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outlaw118

What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

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Just checked my emails. One of my "sign up for random shit" accounts had this beauty sat waiting for me.

 

I dream of making love to you slowly like turtles…
 
Wed 10/07/2019 14:29
Greetings, my dear! I hope to find a great passion and I’m twenty three years old. Do you wish to know how many play things it's possible to put inside my bum? Perhaps you might want to help me in this? Get in touch with me faster, my body need to have a warm fingers! My pictures and personal contacts are in my personal profile! look here
 
Nearly spat tea on my monitor.

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Son, who was having so much shite in his first year as a teacher and resigned to finish at the end of term, has got on the PWC graduate scheme as an trainee auditor leading to become a chartered accountant and eventually managed to pass his NQT so if he ever wanted to do private tutoring, it would be easier.  

Just waiting on daughter's pre-reg exam results next week to find out if after 5 years of study, she's a fully qualified pharmacist or if she has to retake. 

The exam appears to be mental.  They could be asked anything. Some of the answers? 2 out of 4 are right. But one of those is more right  pass Mark is 90% I think. 

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On 6/29/2019 at 9:23 AM, twosmoke300 said:

Why do vegans have to let you know that they are ?

Much like pilots in my experience.

You're not wrong about pilots

You can't tow anything with a Mustang, not approved to tow in the EU but that hasn't stopped a few numpties importing a tow bar from the US , one guy was asking about towing so I pointed out that it wasn't legal and you're probably voiding your insurance

Oh I wasn't going to tow my glider with it

 

How do you know if somebody has read Game Of Thrones, oh they'll tell you , just wait

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11 hours ago, Wack said:

I don't need to tell anybody , they can hear it coming then when it's in sight they see it going sideways into a wall

FTFY because according to the interwebs, all modern Mustangs in this world eventually end up crashing into something. 

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Just stopped the guy on my road that owns the XM (it must be the shitest one that's still road legal). 

'Sorry, just thought I'd let you know your sunroof's open' 

'Ah yes, you see none of the windows work so I thought I'd air it. Anyway, it's pointing uphill, so even if it rains not much water will get in. Of course, if I park it facing downhill then it leaks whether its open or not...' 

CITROEN LIFE

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Applied to be apprentice bike mechanic.

Tell mate that's in the cycling scene, gets me a reference in exchange for a week or so of work experience in a different, one-man bike shop.

Head down, take my most recent bike build with me as quasi-CV.

One and a half hours in I'm asked if I can run the shop for two weeks next month while the owner's on holiday, paid.

 

:shock:

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6 hours ago, Ghosty said:

Applied to be apprentice bike mechanic.

Tell mate that's in the cycling scene, gets me a reference in exchange for a week or so of work experience in a different, one-man bike shop.

Head down, take my most recent bike build with me as quasi-CV.

One and a half hours in I'm asked if I can run the shop for two weeks next month while the owner's on holiday, paid.

 

:shock:

 

Nice one Max! Result.

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12 hours ago, Ghosty said:

Applied to be apprentice bike mechanic.

Tell mate that's in the cycling scene, gets me a reference in exchange for a week or so of work experience in a different, one-man bike shop.

Head down, take my most recent bike build with me as quasi-CV.

One and a half hours in I'm asked if I can run the shop for two weeks next month while the owner's on holiday, paid.

 

:shock:

Trustworthy face

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I'm posting this with a heavy heart... 

Car collecting has been part of my life for decades and as much as I love my car collection and adding to it and enjoy the constant fettling, it takes up too much of my time and I am struggling to keep up with the everyday basics such as cleaning and maintaining my home, so something has to give. 

I will be re-homing my collection 


Please don't ask any questions, as I can't handle talking about it. 





Below is a list of what's available. All FREE of charge, but to good homes only. Serious enquiries only please. 




Thanks for reading and understanding . . . . 
.... 
.... 
.... 


1. Dustpan and brush 
2. Sponges 
3. Dusters 
4. Mop and bucket 
5. Window cleaner 
6. Hoover 
7. Dishwashing liquid 
8. Laundry detergent 
9. Fabric softener 
10. Laundry baskets 
11. Toilet brush 
12. Cleaning sprays 
13. Scrubbing brushes (various) 

 

 

 

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