The grumpy thread

[Bren]

1 hour ago, myglaren said:

Have you a dental hospital near you?

If so then if you just turn up - here it has to be early, 7 a.m. ish, they will almost always see you.

We don't.  The receptionist at my practice told me there were people of a higher priority  than me. I took this to mean they were private as opposed to NHS.

[Tenmil Socket]

I was on the morning commute earlier behind a car that was about to merge onto the motorway.

In the nearside lane was a flatbed towing a trailer that couldn’t move over and is more or less side by side with the car in front. 

Said car then attempts, without indicating, to merge into the nearside lane almost hitting the flatbed but then speeds up to narrowly get in front with the flatbed breaking hard.

I’m then behind this car for a couple of miles witnessing it changing lanes without indicating and struggling to stay in a straight line. 

I thought they must be drunk. 

When I finally started to overtake and glance over it was a young woman on her mobile literally in her face.

IDIOTS

[Kiltox]

Fucksticks

[barefoot]

Not a major grump, but the Scirocco has recently been recovered to a local garage following a breakdown. Whilst it was there I asked if he could mend my horn. Regular readers may remember that this has taken to sounding on occasion when I simply rotate the steering wheel, culminating in me pulling out behind a bin lorry with all the chaps there & me apparently honking like some kind of twat. Obviously I pulled the fuse. 

Collected the motor car this morning & driving home it honked. I rang up to complain, 'You've not mended my horn'. 'Yes I have mate, it wasn't broken, I only had to put in a new fuse!' 

I am surrounded by twats.

[cobblers]

39C forecast here at work on Monday. That's higher than the highest UK temperature on record.

I bought £600 worth of air conditioner to keep the place cool (and the staff happy) but its turned up and doesn't fucking work.

Just shoot me.

 

EDIT: Sod it, I'm closing up for a couple of days and I'll stay at home in the paddling pool.

[MikeR]

https://ormskirkmotorfest.com/

 

the 2022 Ormskirk motorfest is cancelled ... 

[cobblers]

21 hours ago, sierraman said:

I don’t know I don’t buy into this ‘great investment’ bollocks with them. A £20-30k into Hargreaves Lansdown doesn’t require garaging, tyres and welding. I’m sure you can make a pretty penny but not when you factor in your time and effort. That said if you buy it and it’s a hobby then it is an added bonus if it hasn’t halved in value. 

My mum has a bit of cash spare after a house sale. Last week she sent me a facebook marketplace link to a scruffy 1970s VW bay window that had been fucked about with no end - full of filler, had a poorly fitted subaru engine and a shitty "shabby chic" diy interior. £20k.

I said "why have you sent me this?"

"Well I fancy a camper van and I think it would be a good investment".

After convincing her they are the most hateful piles of shit on the road and that she'd be completely unable to drive it, she was still considering buying it to leave stood out in the rain on her driveway for ten years to pay for her retirement. "they've doubled in value the last ten years" she said. 

 

[omegod]

28 minutes ago, cobblers said:

My mum has a bit of cash spare after a house sale. Last week she sent me a facebook marketplace link to a scruffy 1970s VW bay window that had been fucked about with no end - full of filler, had a poorly fitted subaru engine and a shitty "shabby chic" diy interior. £20k.

I said "why have you sent me this?"

"Well I fancy a camper van and I think it would be a good investment".

After convincing her they are the most hateful piles of shit on the road and that she'd be completely unable to drive it, she was still considering buying it to leave stood out in the rain on her driveway for ten years to pay for her retirement. "they've doubled in value the last ten years" she said. 

 

Tell her to find the best Mk1 Focus RS she can for the money and stash that away instead, solid gold investment !  

[cobblers]

1 minute ago, omegod said:

Tell her to find the best Mk1 Focus RS she can for the money and stash that away instead, solid gold investment !  

I don't think one parked out in the rain for a decade untouched would gain much tbh.

[iainrcz]

I've got circa 35k sat in an old ISA earning literally zero. I'm trying to work out what the fuck to do with it.

[Yoss]

2 hours ago, cobblers said:

39C forecast here at work on Monday. That's higher than the highest UK temperature on record.

I bought £600 worth of air conditioner to keep the place cool (and the staff happy) but its turned up and doesn't fucking work.

Just shoot me.

 

EDIT: Sod it, I'm closing up for a couple of days and I'll stay at home in the paddling pool.

Obviously being a postman I'm not particularly looking forward to this. Today was hot but not too bad but Monday and Tuesday look to be in a different league especially as our normal delivery time is approx 9 til 2. 

On previous hot days the the boss at the time has tried to get the mail sorted earlier so we can get out earlier to avoid the worst of the heat. The current boss I don't think even knows what day of the week it is* so I don't expect much help there. 

 

*you think I'm joking but he has twice rung people up on their days off to ask why they weren't in! And last week there's a duty that comes in about 10 o'clock that just does bigger packets. Boss thought he was off Thursday so covered it with other people. The guy came in to find all his work had already gone out. On the Friday, which was his day off, it didn't get covered so he came back Saturday to two days of packets. 

[Yoss]

9 minutes ago, iainrcz said:

I've got circa 35k sat in an old ISA earning literally zero. I'm trying to work out what the fuck to do with it.

Are you asking us for suggestions? 

[MikeR]

9 minutes ago, iainrcz said:

I've got circa 35k sat in an old ISA earning literally zero. I'm trying to work out what the fuck to do with it.

premium bonds , we have won on average 3 to 4% a year ..

or buy a car , or two , or more

[iainrcz]

Just now, Yoss said:

Are you asking us for suggestions? 

Just thinking out loud really, but any suggestions are welcome.

I'm thinking of a more modern ISA. I have a habit of leaving stuff so what I've got now is really not fit for purpose. It's earning about £100 p/a. 

[Wack]

On 7/13/2022 at 9:54 PM, MikeR said:

Door frames for the over 60s ...

I am sure they have some secret mind wiping device in them ...

whats else can explain the fact that I forget why I walked into a room ..

There's also the walk to the shed that completely fries your brain so you get there looking at the 500 things in it with the ,nope not a clue, look on your face

[cobblers]

47 minutes ago, iainrcz said:

I've got circa 35k sat in an old ISA earning literally zero. I'm trying to work out what the fuck to do with it.

BITCOINS AND NFTS BRO

[sierraman]

Not a lot unless you can commit to 5 years minimum in reality. All depends on how readily you need the cash as well and what level of risk you are happy to accept. 

[iainrcz]

1 hour ago, sierraman said:

Not a lot unless you can commit to 5 years minimum in reality. All depends on how readily you need the cash as well and what level of risk you are happy to accept. 

It's been sat for years and I've slowly topped it up to trigger the higher interest rate. Was 0.1 now 0.2/.0.3

I also started a stocks and shares one at the same time. Similar amount of cash. To be honest I'd like it all in one spot.

[sheffcortinacentre]

11 hours ago, Tenmil Socket said:

I was on the morning commute earlier behind a car that was about to merge onto the motorway.

In the nearside lane was a flatbed towing a trailer that couldn’t move over and is more or less side by side with the car in front. 

Said car then attempts, without indicating, to merge into the nearside lane almost hitting the flatbed but then speeds up to narrowly get in front with the flatbed breaking hard.

I’m then behind this car for a couple of miles witnessing it changing lanes without indicating and struggling to stay in a straight line. 

I thought they must be drunk. 

When I finally started to overtake and glance over it was a young woman on her mobile literally in her face.

IDIOTS

Yeah but I is entitled in it!

[richardmorris]

I’ve got half a million in the work deposit account - it’s getting £37 a month.

[sheffcortinacentre]

5 hours ago, Yoss said:

Obviously being a postman I'm not particularly looking forward to this. Today was hot but not too bad but Monday and Tuesday look to be in a different league especially as our normal delivery time is approx 9 til 2. 

On previous hot days the the boss at the time has tried to get the mail sorted earlier so we can get out earlier to avoid the worst of the heat. The current boss I don't think even knows what day of the week it is* so I don't expect much help there. 

 

*you think I'm joking but he has twice rung people up on their days off to ask why they weren't in! And last week there's a duty that comes in about 10 o'clock that just does bigger packets. Boss thought he was off Thursday so covered it with other people. The guy came in to find all his work had already gone out. On the Friday, which was his day off, it didn't get covered so he came back Saturday to two days of packets. 

Your at our local sorting office & icm£5

[iainrcz]

6 hours ago, cobblers said:

BITCOINS AND NFTS BRO

We've already got a bitcoin billionaire at work. Why he hasn't already bought the Bahamas and fucked off I don't know.

[MrGTI6]

Just got back from picking up a 2008 Mitsubishi Outlander from Devon this morning. I wanted something (relatively) modern and nice for commuting, and to use as a family bus. Found one a long way away but it looked good and well-priced. 

About 10 miles into my 250-mile drive it suddenly felt down on power. No warning lights or anything, but it wouldn't go above 70mph on the flat, and on steep hills speed started to drop. On one particular (very steep) hill, it went as low as 45mph and I had to drop down a couple of gears. 

On downhill sections it would get up to 80mph+ and I spent most of the journey trying to carry as much momentum as possible. 

Acceleration was noticeably lacking on slower roads. It keeps pace with traffic but it's definitely not right. 

I'm hoping it's something simple but I'm wondering if it's perhaps the turbo. The engine sounds sweet and there's no untoward noises or warning lights. It even managed 44.3mpg.

I'm gutted as the car should clean up really well and it's fully-loaded with huge spec. I just haven't got the energy for this. Maybe I'll feel differently in the morning... 

[Spurious]

6 minutes ago, MrGTI6 said:

About 10 miles into my 250-mile drive it suddenly felt down on power. No warning lights or anything, but it wouldn't go above 70mph on the flat, and on steep hills speed started to drop. On one particular (very steep) hill, it went as low as 45mph and I had to drop down a couple of gears. 

My C5 was doing that when the MAF sensor was bad. No warning lights, it just felt very sluggish and down on power. New car with a new maf sensor. 

Did you buy it off a garage? Sounds very like the fault was there already. 

 

[Remspoor]

@MrGTI6Look at the fuel filter too.

[Sunny Jim]

And the air filter too, hopefully it is something that simple. Years ago I bought an Audi A4 which displayed similar symptoms on the journey home and on checking the air filter it was filthy (I mean black and covered in leaves and twigs). New filter and it was fine. Fingers crossed for you.

[MrGTI6]

Thanks for the replies.

Went out in the car this morning. It instantly felt more responsive. I took a detour down a local stretch of dual carriageway and it was spot on. In fact the engine felt very strong and the turbo was kicking in nicely. 

Better still the EML came up, so I should be able to get some fault codes off of it tomorrow.

Thanks again for the responses, much appreciated! 

[artdjones]

23 minutes ago, MrGTI6 said:

Thanks for the replies.

Went out in the car this morning. It instantly felt more responsive. I took a detour down a local stretch of dual carriageway and it was spot on. In fact the engine felt very strong and the turbo was kicking in nicely. 

Better still the EML came up, so I should be able to get some fault codes off of it tomorrow.

Thanks again for the responses, much appreciated! 

It could be a problem with the solenoid that controls the vacuum supply to the turbo actuator.

[Low Horatio gearbox]

Getting a flat on a tyre that was new and put on, on Friday afternoon with about 20 miles.

[jakebullet]

FFS cunt next door problems again!

To stop cunt climbing over the wall I did a trellis installation:

Looks nice yes?, better than the plain wall.

I'm looking out the window, and I can see a broom bending the trellis from the cunt side. So I went out for a word. Cunt doesn't like them, they look ugly from his side of the wall. I may have enjoy telling him they're on my side of the wall, and it's my wall not his anyway.

He then threatens he's going to snap them off. I tell him to go ahead, I will sue him for damage. There's some bollocks about his mate built the wall, so he thinks he owns it?? So I grab my phone and start recording, and invite him to say what he likes about my new trellis. I then get random abuse about I haven't got a bird and do I fuck my mum, so I tell him he's a clueless cunt who need a shoeing. 

His stupid big gobbed bird comes out and starts screaming about she's phoning the police as I'm filming her naked children and I'm a disgusting pervert. Er, knock yourself out, unless your naked children are invisible they're not on my video. She then makes cunt go in the house while screaming threats at me.

I guess it's only going to get more unpleasant from here on, so operation solicitor starts tomorrow. I'm downloading video files, as while the camera doesn't show him in his garden, there's no doubt audio of him saying he's going to damage the trellis.