Crankshaft Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 I reckon CAR was the best magazine of the 70s/80s and always liked their 'For, Against, Sum-up' verdicts in the back of each issue. All cars were listed under Interesting or Boring. Some of the Boring ones are quite amusing. I think Nissan stopped lending them cars at one point. 'The Good, the Bad and the Ugly: Our tell-it-like-it-is guide to all the new cars on the market.' Some verdicts of 70s shite from my Dec '77 copy... Morris MarinaFor: Performance, room. Against: Everything else utterly appalling. Sum-up: Embarrassment. Toyota CarinaFor: Trusty. Against: So mundane. Against: ZZZZZZ. Chrysler HunterFor: Price? Against: Just about everything. Sum-up: Horrid. Rover SD1For: Style, go/consumption. Against: Nasty interior, delivery delays. Sum-up: BMW-beater. Austin PrincessFor: Room. Against: Thirsty. Sum-up: Good, but more for the older man. Citroen GSFor: Refinement. Against: Very little. Sum-up: World beater. Let me know if you would like to see any other verdicts, prices etc. NorfolkNWeigh, JeeExEll, FakeConcern and 8 others 11 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bobthebeard Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 Jalopy magazine was obviously later than 1970's.But the car verdicts/ buyers guides were hilarious.If only I could read some of them again. Along the lines of:"Likely to dissolve after an overnight rain shower. Just leaving a car shaped brown stain on the drive"Etc. ProgRocker and privatewire 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorfolkNWeigh Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 Some of my favourites were( I think, it's been a long time);As flash as a rat with a gold tooth. Cadillac , possibly Coupe de Ville or Brougham. Oh death, where is thy sting? Triumph Spitfire Cortina in drag. Obviously for the Capri Their totally biased love for Alfasuds and GSes meant there was never any point in reading a Giant Test that featured either- I can't remember what happened when both were in the same test- must have caused meltdown in Smithfield. Sudsprint and Bobthebeard 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mk2_craig Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 Nissan Sunny. A Datsun for the 80s. 90 year olds will like it too NorfolkNWeigh, Bobthebeard, Banger Kenny and 5 others 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carlo Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 Yes i remember that Sunny one. Another which sticks in my mind was for a Lancer estate I think: For: Tail lightsAgainst: everything aft forgotten the summary was pretty biting no doubt. mk2_craig and egg 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Timewaster Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 Was it the Alfasud that was said to have rampant rust everywhere with the possible exception of the tyres and seats? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crankshaft Posted May 27, 2017 Author Share Posted May 27, 2017 Jalopy magazine was obviously later than 1970's.But the car verdicts/ buyers guides were hilarious.If only I could read some of them again.Along the lines of:"Likely to dissolve after an overnight rain shower. Just leaving a car shaped brown stain on the drive"Etc.I should have said CAR was the best 'mainstream' car magazine. I don't remember ever seeing Jalopy - it sounds ace. Off to eBay to find one. Bobthebeard 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bobthebeard Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 I should have said CAR was the best 'mainstream' car magazine.I don't remember ever seeing Jalopy - it sounds ace. Off to eBay to find one.You won't regret it! One fine publication. I still miss it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lord Sward Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 The MGB was savaged in its final year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
holbeck Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 From memory Montego 2.0.For: Torquey engine. Against: Talkey engine mk2_craig 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zantimisfit Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 I think reading Car as a kid was basically responsible for my unreasonable prejudice against Japanese cars... they were all shit and/or deathly dull according to Car, and they still are in my head. I've only had one, a Honda Accord that was excellent in most respects but still failed to worm its way into my heart. Just a Honda innit? Same with MGBs, Midgets, Spitfires etc. I love the most hopeless of old cars...I would really like a Hillman Super Minx one day for example, but still turn my nose up at 70s BL sports cars as they were such objects of total derision when I was of the age where I was forming my opinions about such things. Now an MG Montego is another matter entirely. Thats like Lagonda for somebody short on cash. They has it in for Minis as well for a long time...but even as an 8 year old I knew that was bollocks Crankshaft, cros, carlo and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirk Diggler Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 .They has it in for Minis as well for a long time...but even as an 8 year old I knew that was bollocksApart from Setright; I still remember a Group Test in around 1990 where the relaunched Cooper nearly won against 205 GTI, R5 gt, Golf GTI etc etc. Read it intermittently until about 2002; glory days well behind it from mid 90s on For Goes like stinkAgainst Rodeo RideSum-up Wild man on wheels Zantimisfit, Sudsprint, Crankshaft and 2 others 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zantimisfit Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 Apart from Setright; I still remember a Group Test in around 1990 where the relaunched Cooper nearly won against 205 GTI, R5 gt, Golf GTI etc etc. Read it intermittently until about 2002; glory days well behind it from mid 90s on For Goes like stink Against Rodeo Ride Sum-up Wild man on wheels Yeah remember that one. Tested against those three plus quite a few others...Metro GTI, AX GT, Alfa 33, XR2, Uno Turbo etc. A couple, including Setright, had the Cooper at the top, the 'softees' had it near the bottom cos it 'lacked lumbar support' etc. Jessies! Dirk Diggler and Crankshaft 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crankshaft Posted May 27, 2017 Author Share Posted May 27, 2017 Apart from Setright; I still remember a Group Test in around 1990 where the relaunched Cooper nearly won against 205 GTI, R5 gt, Golf GTI etc etc. Read it intermittently until about 2002; glory days well behind it from mid 90s onFor Goes like stinkAgainst Rodeo RideSum-up Wild man on wheelsI remember that group test with the Mini. Each writer had to rank the cars on which was the most fun to drive and Setright placed the Mini 1st as it was fun even going slowly. Dirk Diggler 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crankshaft Posted May 27, 2017 Author Share Posted May 27, 2017 I think reading Car as a kid was basically responsible for my unreasonable prejudice against Japanese cars... they were all shit and/or deathly dull according to Car, and they still are in my head.Me too. These are from GBU 1982: Datsun SunnyFor: Looks a little better than before. Against: But the dynamic qualities are just as terrible. Sum-up: Another dependable but deadly dull Datsun. Few cars more mediocre. BluebirdFor: Sturdiness. Against: Terrible ride. Sum-up: Among the worst of the Japanese. 280C (no F, A, S-U)Datsun aren't silly - they won't let us drive one. Funny how their opinion of the Mini changed - in '82 it was a 'decrepit curiosity', in the 90s it was seen as a charming/fun/icon or something - with no significant changes. Want my Sandglow Clubman back now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crankshaft Posted May 27, 2017 Author Share Posted May 27, 2017 Love this - makes me want one even more: GBU 1980, Allegro Vanden Plas For: Those impervious to its looks. Against: It exists. Sum-up: Leyland joke. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
martc Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 Their totally biased love for Alfasuds and GSes meant there was never any point in reading a Giant Test that featured either- I can't remember what happened when both were in the same test- must have caused meltdown in Smithfield. Still the same with modern mags + Top Gear (TV); but substitute Alfa/GS for anything with a German badge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FakeConcern Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 I remember the new VW Beetle "What's the point, Dude?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sierraman Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 They loved the Citroen Visa IIRC Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mat_the_cat Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 I remember their sum-up for the (original) Dacia Duster:"Duster to dust, ashes to ashes. Quick someone, pass us the matches." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndyW201 Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 Loved the GBU. I remember their one for the FSO Polonez, For: In Poland, this is regarded as a luxury good.Against: So is bread.Sum up: Lacks solidarity. Nissan Prairie, For: Large doors aid entry.Against: Why would you want to get in?Sum up: At least they tried. Subaru XT, For: Certainly distinctive.Against: So is wearing a fez. Nissan Sunny coupe, For: Enormous rear speakers.Against: No power, dreadful looks, awful ride and handling.Sum up: The world's worst "performance" coupe. Reliant Kitten, For: At least it has four wheels.Against: But not much else.Sum up: Frightful! Ironically, most or all are autoshite favourites these days! Timewaster, NorfolkNWeigh, egg and 4 others 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crankshaft Posted May 27, 2017 Author Share Posted May 27, 2017 They loved the Citroen Visa IIRCYep. 1982 - Sum-up: Peugeot origins but so very Citroen in appeal and ability - sensible in town and good on open road. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProgRocker Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 Re: Jalopy - I remember a bit of what they wrote about Fiat in their data section. Something along the lines of: 'most of the cars have plenty of GO but also have the capacity to STOP at random intervals.' Quite apt I thought. And a brief data write up about something called an 'Earnshaw Diamond' with a 666cc whirlygig engine. ????? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProgRocker Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 Yep. 1982 - Sum-up: Peugeot origins but so very Citroen in appeal and ability - sensible in town and good on open road. I once had a copy of a 1987 issue of Car and there was a top 10 of their favourite cars (or LKJ Setright's?). The Citroen Visa 17D and 2CV6 was in there amongst the Porsche 911 and other posh motors. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crankshaft Posted May 27, 2017 Author Share Posted May 27, 2017 GBU '82: OMFG: TAGORA! £7739 - 10815 For: Space, comfort, clean handling, fair zip and stability of SX. Against: Excessive width, slightly sluggish feel of 2.2. Sum-up: Half Peugeot, very good all round, likeable and a serious rival for Granada and Rover. Peugeot 504 £5485 - 8522Sum-up: Hard to beat, at any price; smooth, quality saloon. Triumph Acclaim, £4829 - 5742Sum-up: Thorough, impressive and satisfying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Reverend Bluejeans Posted May 28, 2017 Share Posted May 28, 2017 BMW E21: 'more upmarket Cortina than exalted sports saloon' Probably. Renault 30: 'Only needs self levelling to be a world beater' O RLY? CAR was a superb magazine until about 20 years ago. LJKS, Bishop, Phil Lllewwellllyn, Frazer, Mel Blaaady Nichols etc made it great. Gavin Green kept the standard high and Russell Bulgin - an utterly awful man in real life - was a superb writer. Steve Crapley was okay but I felt that Bremner was about the last half decent writer before CAR's descent into becoming another coffee table mag. The standard of journalism in car mags like this is utterly dire now. I read - in disbelief - an Autocrap road test involving a new G30 5 Series and a Jag. It was utter verbal diarrhoea, quite the worst piece of writing I've read for many years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dome Posted May 28, 2017 Share Posted May 28, 2017 I've just dug out a load of early to mid 90s Car magazines whilst clearing out my Dad's house. I've also got the first 70 odd issues of Evo which I used to love, I was encouraged to see how much some issues go for on Ebay! I'll be keeping the Car magazines and punting the Evos I think. I also found some Performance Cars, I used to love that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
egg Posted May 28, 2017 Share Posted May 28, 2017 I remember that group test with the Mini. Each writer had to rank the cars on which was the most fun to drive and Setright placed the Mini 1st as it was fun even going slowly.I love that group test, I read it about once a year! Zantimisfit 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Felly Magic Posted May 28, 2017 Share Posted May 28, 2017 Modern car mags suck up to their advertisers, as they rely on that revenue, as no bugger really buys them. What Car? constantly cocksuck VAG, and Auto Excuse, LOLZ, comedy photoshops as 'exclusives' The Reverend Bluejeans 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pillock Posted May 28, 2017 Share Posted May 28, 2017 My uncle used to give me CAR magazines as a nipper. I'd flick through the articles but then head straight to the GBU and read any particular scathing ones to my enthralled* family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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