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The grumpy thread


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Posted
  On 22/05/2016 at 16:16, Tamworthbay said:

my mate is there at the moment, a couple of days ago it was 46 degrees outside and 52 in the factory. I love the heat but that is pushing it even for me.

I would actually burst into flames in that sort of heat . Or top myself !
Posted
  On 22/05/2016 at 16:26, twosmoke300 said:

I would actually burst into flames in that sort of heat . Or top myself !

I like it around 40 but found 45 a bit much when we were in Cyprus in a heatwave a few years back. It was ok if you could sit in the sea but the idea of it being nearly ten degrees more AND have to install heavy machinery doesn't bear thinking about and he is always rough when he gets back as the food doesn't agree with him. I normally take the mick but just feel sorry for him this time.
Posted
  On 22/05/2016 at 16:26, vulgalour said:

I'm having one of those weekends.  Burst tyre on the Rover, welder not welding, trigger on the chainsaw broken, hedge loppers broken, household fuse blown... I think I'll just stay indoors for a bit and try not to touch anything.

 

be careful going to the toilet then! :mrgreen:

Posted

Thanks to our dog pissing on the busa and stripping the paint I have been forced to spend £26 on the correct colour aerosol from RS paints. They are very good - and they should be at that price.

 

The dog has been warned.Consequently I have the only King Charles that can walk and cover its knackers.

  • Like 1
Posted

Christ, what does it piss? Battery acid?

Posted
  On 22/05/2016 at 10:17, Junkman said:

They send me to India for two weeks.

Can't stand Indian food. I hope they have Austrian takeaways there.

 

Bizarre but if you pop over the border to the North there's an Austrian Restaurant in Kathmandu called the Kaiser Café -  which I frequented when working at the university. 

  • Like 3
Posted
  On 22/05/2016 at 10:06, HH-R said:

The fortnightly moans about the quality of content on here are incredibly tedious.

 

We never get anywhere with it because by and large there aren't rules about what you can post, there's just each member's own arbitrary standards of what they deem is or isn't shit. There's usually a kick off, a few people will flounce off, then everyone else is left uneasy about what they're posting to avoid the "you're posting shit" moan but it happens anyway like a fucking broken record.

 

Absolutely spot on.

Posted

We got told last week that we are not getting any pay rises this year as the chap that owns the company said there was not enough money to warrant it.

 

Today he turned up to work in a brand new BMW i8.

Posted

Liked that in solitary, not because your company's owner is a prick.

  • Like 3
Posted

Had about 8 reminders in the last 2 weeks to fill in the completely anonymous* staff survey

 

Followed up by an email from our Director this morning that 2 people in our department haven't filled it in and can they do so by the end of the week so we have 100% response rate

 

was previously not filling it in due to couldn't be arsed, now not filling it in due to clearly NOT being anonymous.

Posted

Twat in the Merc Sprinter on the 303 this morning....................if you going to carve up a large yellow recovery truck, best not have the website of the company you work for emblazoned across your back doors........your boss had an enraged email from me before you got to the next roundabout..........have a nice day.

  • Like 2
Posted
  On 23/05/2016 at 12:36, Captain Furious said:

Had about 8 reminders in the last 2 weeks to fill in the completely anonymous* staff survey

 

Followed up by an email from our Director this morning that 2 people in our department haven't filled it in and can they do so by the end of the week so we have 100% response rate

 

was previously not filling it in due to couldn't be arsed, now not filling it in due to clearly NOT being anonymous.

Yep, had that at a previous job.

 

"Everyone's done the survey except Jon because he refused".

 

Me: "Yep, well anonymous, cheers."

Posted

Some twat has keyed my car today. Well done, knobhead. Really brave of you.

Posted
  On 22/05/2016 at 07:03, beko1987 said:

So after messing about with the sky to get fibre, but downgrade the TV so the cost doesnt change, all hell breaks loose this morning when half of the TV channels stop working. I said not to worry, we can stream from the sky kids app, but no, that stops working if you don't have the package we used to have. I could sense a big argument coming, so fuck it, online, upgrade, £7 more than we paid before, so fuck all point doing anything really.

 

Fuck it, I'll just pay the bills and shut up, it's easier. Thank fuck she's going out in a bit, I fancy smashing something up with a hammer

 

Cancel it and within a few hours you will get a 50% offer on your on-line account. Or at least you def would if you had not just upgraded. We sacked ours off 2 months ago and have a youview box and 2 Now TV boxes plus an extra £35 in the bank every month. 

Posted

Some arsehole in a new Golf TD giving it the bigguns to me making hand jestures. What's the point lad? What is it I'd done wrong exactly? If ya gonna start playing hard man behind the wheel, don't run away because you'll only get trapped behind slow moving traffic allowing me to pull up beside you and simply ask what the problem is. Wanker.

  • Like 2
Posted

Went to the garage this afternoon to say 'Hello' to the dollop and see if it would start after two weeks of being idle. It started fine, but the bloody car was COVERED in snails and their delightful trails all over the flaming thing! There was something on the side of the front wing that looked... 'orrible. So, instead of letting it stay in there slumbering, she was dragged un-ceremoniously  out into the daylight and the Mazda got dumped in there. Brought it home and washed the poor old thing in a 'vigorous' manner.

 

She looks great now all leathered and shiny.

 

Oh, and some arsehole used the front of the Mazda as a parking aid AGAIN last night. Another new front number plate required and the plastic plinth behind as well for good measure. What's worse is: the alarm must have gone off (it did the multiple bleeps thing when I turned it off this morning) and I didn't sodding hear it.

 

Also went into an actual shop (as opposed to eBay or Amazon where I normally shop) 'cos I wanted a new kitchen knife - I only have one and I broke it last week doing something to the car. I came out £71 worse off after buying loads of stuff I didn't need (breadbin, new can opener, and....) amd a fancy block of wood with LOADS of sharp knives embedded in it - I feel like King Arthur now whenever I have to cut something!

 

The above reminded me why I don't go in shops: I am financially irresponsible and have no self control and I am prone to bouts of 'Magpie' shopping.

Posted
  On 23/05/2016 at 15:46, dugong said:

Yep, had that at a previous job."Everyone's done the survey except Jon because he refused".Me: "Yep, well anonymous, cheers."

Stupid thing is, I'd happily fill it out with my name all over it, hell they can publish it on the intranet for all I care, just don't piss on my back and tell me it's raining with this anonymous bullshit

  • Like 3
Posted
  On 23/05/2016 at 18:56, Captain Furious said:

Stupid thing is, I'd happily fill it out with my name all over it, hell they can publish it on the intranet for all I care, just don't piss on my back and tell me it's raining with this anonymous bullshit

It used to amuse me that our IT department had an "anonymous feedback" system; I always filled it in whether negative or positive, it made no difference the systems were still pretty poor.

Posted

Wanted to change fuel filter on A6.

 

Jack car up, remove cover, surprise surprise - a fairly new looking mann filter.

 

Only problem is the circular clamp holding the filter has been butchered due to a broken screw - whole shebang secured with a cable tie.

 

Because of this, the whole moves about, preventing me releasing the connections on the filter.

 

Bollocks. Whole lot reassembled. I now have £23 worth of filter in the boot which is unlikely ever to be fitted.

 

Sometimes I do think if I bought shares in a crematorium people would stop dying.

Posted

Golf has rewarded last week's efforts of painting it's wheels and buying it some suitably 90's rubber mats in the most predictable way...

 

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Sigh.

Posted

Dropped the Locosts cylinder head off 3 weeks ago to get the porous issue fixed. Been fobbed off every time I phone them for an update. Was promised a phone call today but got fuck all. For a supposedly well respected engineering company they're doing a good job of behaving like incompetent fuckwits who couldn't find there arse with both hands. And the weathers good so I could've been driving it :(

 

Annoying thing is they did a great job on the Mercs head so can be good if they want to be. 

Posted

Xtriple:  Can you put some non-drying paint on the front of the Mazda to leave an incriminating mark on the perpetrator of the Paris parking?

  • Like 2
Posted
  On 23/05/2016 at 21:11, vulgalour said:

Xtriple:  Can you put some non-drying paint on the front of the Mazda to leave an incriminating mark on the perpetrator of the Paris parking?

Thats a bloody good idea. Where would one acquire said item? It should be safe for a day or two as it's locked away where only the snails can get it! On the other hand, this means that the big green bogey will be used for the same parking methods for a while.

Posted

It doesn't have to be paint, I suspect anti-climb paint might be a bit annoying.  You could just tape a cream bun to the front of your car and it'll leave telltale cream bun on the other car.

Posted

Couriers.  Again.  Yodel in this particular instance.

 

I ordered a new tyre for the Transit off eBay over a week ago.  It hadn't turned up and I was starting to get slightly miffed - was about to email the seller asking where it was when I got a knock on the door from my next door neighbour.

 

Yodel had obviously turned up when I was at work, so (as they often do) they went to leave the tyre with next door.  Except that they were out as well.  So Yodel man simply pushes open nehgbour's shed door and dumps the tyre in there.  No card left with either me or the neighbours.  He obviously hadn't stood the tyre very securely as it had fallen over and the neighbour now couldn't open her shed door.

 

FFS.  :roll:

Posted
  On 23/05/2016 at 21:11, vulgalour said:

Xtriple:  Can you put some non-drying paint on the front of the Mazda to leave an incriminating mark on the perpetrator of the Paris parking?

I know the animal lovers will be after me with pitchforks, but a hound owner kept letting their hound shit on my grass verge, then leaving it (It must have been the bloody hound of the baskervilles too, judging by what it left behind) anyway, one day I found some green spray paint at work... A quick wiz over the grass (always the same spot) one last deposit and never seen again.
  • Like 3
Posted

this afternoon on the M1 southbound between J33 & J31 in the 50mph roadworks with distance/speed scamera's.

dear mr 16 plt coach driver  the stopping distance at this speed is not 20ft (being a professional driver you prob know this) so FUCK OFF i'm not breaking the limit & getting a ticket for you while I pass the artic in lane one just so you can hog lane 2.

if I hadn't been alone I to would have done a colc.

Posted

PM in shite shocker thread pisses me off, it's got fuck all to do with cars and everything to do with politics, which is fucking boring and deserves to be shifted to the open section where i can ignore it, people so inclined can whip up internetz keyboard warrior rage without knocking any number of decent threads down the list.

 

Anyone got a picture of an L plate Carina E in 90s turquoise to restore the shite balance

Posted
  On 23/05/2016 at 22:03, Honey Badger said:

Anyone got a picture of an L plate Carina E in 90s turquoise to restore the shite balance

No, but here's a pic of my P reg one.

 

post-190-0-97229600-1464041607_thumb.jpg

Posted
  On 23/05/2016 at 22:13, wuvvum said:

No, but here's a pic of my P reg one.

 

attachicon.gifDSCF8468.jpg

 

Close enough, are they as exciting to drive as they are to look at?

 

I can almost feel the multi coloured seat pattern searing my eyeballs.

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