The grumpy thread

[Remspoor]

Give it a rest.

https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2024/dec/24/average-briton-causes-23-times-more-co2-on-christmas-day-study-reveals

[Metal Guru]

20 hours ago, gm said:

doing the christmas drinks shop this afternoon at aldis and i managed to smash a full bottle of wine all over the conveyor belt at the till !

i can’t recall my reaction but have a suspicion that i may have just said “fuck” really loudly.

the cashier was sound and got another till open for the amused / horrified queue behind me while we cleaned up the mess. you’d be amazed just how far one bottle of red can spread in a flat surface. 

i apologised profusely and offered to pay for the broken bottle but was told not to worry,  apparently this happens more often than you’d think. 

i still felt like a total tit, but the staff were great. might avoid the store for a few weeks though  

 

When I worked in a supermarket the rule was before you paid , you were lucky and got a replacement free, after you’d paid, tough.

One day a rough looking guy broke a bottle of whisky after he’d paid. However, our store manager decided to replace it for him. I think the guy standing there with a broken bottle in his hand someone swayed his decision.

[BorniteIdentity]

22 hours ago, richardmorris said:

I’ve always found the checkout staff at Aldi to be great. You just need to be ready to catch the shopping as it flies past their scanner.

The problem isn’t the staff, it’s the shoppers that don’t understand the protocol. 

You’re not supposed to pack your bags at the checkout. You stick it all back in your trolley as fast as the bird on the till launches it at you, and then you pack it once paid over at the bagging area.

Whenever everyone’s singing the same song, it’s amazingly efficient. Sadly, it only takes one old giffer who wants to talk about the weather and pay with two deep pockets full of change to fuck the whole thing. 

I only go to these places to perv on the Eastern European women who patronise them; obviously I’m more of a Waitrose fellow 😉

[hairnet]

https://www.malloryparkcircuit.com/event/plum-pudding-races-4/

ffs 

always think its at new year

[myglaren]

Some of the female staff at one of the local Lidl's are very attractive and can make the visit worthwhile.

One looks like Ekaterina (Katya, Katy) Menz, on bass here for the Otta Orchestra.

The one shown on the thumbnail.

[sheffcortinacentre]

4 hours ago, Remspoor said:

Give it a rest.

https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2024/dec/24/average-briton-causes-23-times-more-co2-on-christmas-day-study-reveals

The human race needs to commit mass suicide , only these people will be happy.

[reb]

8 minutes ago, sheffcortinacentre said:

The human race needs to commit mass suicide , only these people will be happy.

Article written to make you grumpy has made you grumpy. Does that make you grumpy?

[Pieman]

1 hour ago, hairnet said:

https://www.malloryparkcircuit.com/event/plum-pudding-races-4/

ffs 

always think its at new year

1) you've linked to the 2023 event page with my mate's old Hyundai Coupe on it, and 2) I've posted twice in relevant threads about this year's in the last few days.  

[Pieman]

19 hours ago, jakebullet said:

Idiot sister is driving Ma to want death by playing the opposite game to extreme. Ask Ma something, then rubbish the answer and say it's the exact opposite. Repeat daily. Result another one who doesn't want to be here. Quite why she can't tell Idiot to fuck right off, and then fuck off some more I don't know. No, I can't say anything to sister, as she then makes up shite that I've said, and Ma believes the lying sack of shit and gives me shit about it for months.

I've reminded you before that this is the person who deliberately ran you over with her car.  She needs a good slap in the fucking face.

[maxxo]

Well I’ve fallen out with my uncle today

(Grandparents son)

all the family together, now bear in mind I am the only person in the family who actually visits my grandparents regularly and bother with me (I visit them twice a week without fail)

anyway he was trying to talk them into getting a new boiler/heating system (had this before around 6k to do it)

saying all the benefits like oh you’ll gain a small amount of loft space and an extra cupboard in the massive airing cupboard getting rid of the tanks etc on demand hot water blah blah blah

i said it

”I think it’s a complete waste of money personally, they’ve never had an issue with the current system and it works absolutely fine, personally I feel you’re just trying to get them to spend the money so the house will supposedly be worth more then they die so you can sell it”

that’s my honest opinion, I’ve spoken with them afterwards and we all agreed it’s a complete waste of money and would be a difficult job anyway due to pipe runs

anyway

according to my quite nasty aunt (dickheads wife) I’m a right little bastard 

aye

I live around 18 miles from the grandparents and visit them twice a week, he lives 1 mile away and hasn’t stepped foot in their house in 5 years, never calls etc or does anything to help then

it reminded me just how pissed off I am with the entire family just abandoning them and not bothering with them at all, I mean it’s only ever me who actually goes to see them, who calls them, who takes them on trips out, who does all the jobs for them

yet I’m the bad one

ive made a promise to my grandparents when they die I’m changing the locks and protecting their house until something proper is sorted, which I’m happy to do to make sure nothing is thrown away etc

i needed to get that off my chest, I’ve been stewing on it all day and quite frankly I’m sick to shit of them all

perhaps also not helped whilst I was at their house today the landline rang, I answered it and it was the cow, I frankly told her to piss off and actually understand that they won’t be around forever and maybe come and see them

a discussion about boilers led to a falling out I’m pleased about

successful Christmas 

[maxxo]

Also bloody Citroen Xsara Picassos

i can go years without really giving them a second thought

then for example I watch Gavin and Stacey and then I hanker for another one

i don’t know why, I’ve just always thought they’re fantastic 

[chodweaver]

Well I’ve fallen out with my uncle today
(Grandparents son)
all the family together, now bear in mind I am the only person in the family who actually visits my grandparents regularly and bother with me (I visit them twice a week without fail)
anyway he was trying to talk them into getting a new boiler/heating system (had this before around 6k to do it)
saying all the benefits like oh you’ll gain a small amount of loft space and an extra cupboard in the massive airing cupboard getting rid of the tanks etc on demand hot water blah blah blah
i said it
”I think it’s a complete waste of money personally, they’ve never had an issue with the current system and it works absolutely fine, personally I feel you’re just trying to get them to spend the money so the house will supposedly be worth more then they die so you can sell it”
that’s my honest opinion, I’ve spoken with them afterwards and we all agreed it’s a complete waste of money and would be a difficult job anyway due to pipe runs
anyway
according to my quite nasty aunt (dickheads wife) I’m a right little bastard 
aye
I live around 18 miles from the grandparents and visit them twice a week, he lives 1 mile away and hasn’t stepped foot in their house in 5 years, never calls etc or does anything to help then
it reminded me just how pissed off I am with the entire family just abandoning them and not bothering with them at all, I mean it’s only ever me who actually goes to see them, who calls them, who takes them on trips out, who does all the jobs for them
yet I’m the bad one
ive made a promise to my grandparents when they die I’m changing the locks and protecting their house until something proper is sorted, which I’m happy to do to make sure nothing is thrown away etc
i needed to get that off my chest, I’ve been stewing on it all day and quite frankly I’m sick to shit of them all
perhaps also not helped whilst I was at their house today the landline rang, I answered it and it was the cow, I frankly told her to piss off and actually understand that they won’t be around forever and maybe come and see them
a discussion about boilers led to a falling out I’m pleased about
successful Christmas 

...is the correct way to handle crap family at Christmas. Respect, Max!

[reb]

I handled crap family by telling them to piss off and going for a walk to see if I could find Phil Jupitus.

 

 

I didn't find him, but given he lives in the town, I might have.

[somewhatfoolish]

1 hour ago, maxxo said:

”I think it’s a complete waste of money personally, they’ve never had an issue with the current system and it works absolutely fine, personally I feel you’re just trying to get them to spend the money so the house will supposedly be worth more then they die so you can sell it”

Have you ever considered a job with the diplomatic service?🤣

[New POD]

7 hours ago, maxxo said:

Well I’ve fallen out with my uncle today

(Grandparents son)

all the family together, now bear in mind I am the only person in the family who actually visits my grandparents regularly and bother with me (I visit them twice a week without fail)

anyway he was trying to talk them into getting a new boiler/heating system (had this before around 6k to do it)

saying all the benefits like oh you’ll gain a small amount of loft space and an extra cupboard in the massive airing cupboard getting rid of the tanks etc on demand hot water blah blah blah

i said it

”I think it’s a complete waste of money personally, they’ve never had an issue with the current system and it works absolutely fine, personally I feel you’re just trying to get them to spend the money so the house will supposedly be worth more then they die so you can sell it”

that’s my honest opinion, I’ve spoken with them afterwards and we all agreed it’s a complete waste of money and would be a difficult job anyway due to pipe runs

anyway

according to my quite nasty aunt (dickheads wife) I’m a right little bastard 

aye

I live around 18 miles from the grandparents and visit them twice a week, he lives 1 mile away and hasn’t stepped foot in their house in 5 years, never calls etc or does anything to help then

it reminded me just how pissed off I am with the entire family just abandoning them and not bothering with them at all, I mean it’s only ever me who actually goes to see them, who calls them, who takes them on trips out, who does all the jobs for them

yet I’m the bad one

ive made a promise to my grandparents when they die I’m changing the locks and protecting their house until something proper is sorted, which I’m happy to do to make sure nothing is thrown away etc

i needed to get that off my chest, I’ve been stewing on it all day and quite frankly I’m sick to shit of them all

perhaps also not helped whilst I was at their house today the landline rang, I answered it and it was the cow, I frankly told her to piss off and actually understand that they won’t be around forever and maybe come and see them

a discussion about boilers led to a falling out I’m pleased about

successful Christmas 

Have they made a will and who is the executor?  

If No. Then offer to organise it for them. 

If yes, and the executor isn't you, then it's up to the executors to dispose/value/sell/hand out to family and stuff. 

If it is you. Jobs a good one. Change the locks. 

[maxxo]

1 hour ago, New POD said:

Have they made a will and who is the executor?  

If No. Then offer to organise it for them. 

If yes, and the executor isn't you, then it's up to the executors to dispose/value/sell/hand out to family and stuff. 

If it is you. Jobs a good one. Change the locks. 

they do not have one, i suspect it will likely end up being me as they have hinted towards wanting me to look after their affairs when they pass

i understand it's not tat what they have, a lot of it is actually antiques, just no one else realises that so i've promised to care for it all

[Westbay]

You really need them to put it in writing, there's a world of grief coming if they don't ...

[Morris 63]

22 minutes ago, Westbay said:

You really need them to put it in writing, there's a world of grief coming if they don't ...

Couldn't agree more. No will leaves a shit situation (guess how I know).

It can end up as your word against the uncle's. He'd likely win as their direct descendant. 

An total respect for you seeing them and sticking up for them.

[Metal Guru]

29 minutes ago, maxxo said:

they do not have one, i suspect it will likely end up being me as they have hinted towards wanting me to look after their affairs when they pass

i understand it's not tat what they have, a lot of it is actually antiques, just no one else realises that so i've promised to care for it all

Where is your parent , son or daughter of your grandparents in all this? Surely it’s their job not yours. (Sorry if they’re dead , but just asking).

Without a will naming you as either executor or beneficiary , you’ll have no say and be told to FRO.

 

[maxxo]

1 minute ago, Metal Guru said:

Where is your parent , son or daughter of your grandparents in all this? Surely it’s their job not yours. (Sorry if they’re dead , but just asking).

Without a will naming you as either executor or beneficiary , you’ll have no say and be told to FRO.

 

they've mentioned about me being on the will to sort it all out and i think a plan is in place for that

no other family, even my parents have any interest in doing it and have said they'll just skip everything in the house

 

[Metal Guru]

Just now, maxxo said:

they've mentioned about me being on the will to sort it all out and i think a plan is in place for that

no other family, even my parents have any interest in doing it and have said they'll just skip everything in the house

 

I’m sure they’d not skip stuff if they knew it was valuable. Nothing gets people interested more quickly than money.

I’m in the process of  clearing out my mother’s house. There’s no antiques. A few things that various people want but the vast majority is stuff my mother liked but no one else wants. Sad to do, but if it doesn’t get dumped, my son will just have twice as much stuff to get rid of when I die. You can only take so much to charity shops. 

[maxxo]

2 minutes ago, Metal Guru said:

I’m sure they’d not skip stuff if they knew it was valuable. Nothing gets people interested more quickly than money.

I’m in the process of  clearing out my mother’s house. There’s no antiques. A few things that various people want but the vast majority is stuff my mother liked but no one else wants. Sad to do, but if it doesn’t get dumped, my son will just have twice as much stuff to get rid of when I die. You can only take so much to charity shops. 

i don't know even half the stuff they have, i know there's a lot of antiques etc so i'd want a few days going through everything sorting it out

i guess i'm just more pissed off no one bothers with them

[GrumpiusMaximus]

@maxxo if they don't have a will, as others have said, you are in for an absolute World of pain.  It doesn't need to take them long or cost them much to write one.  If everybody gets along and nobody argues, it's not so bad but nothing divides a family like an inheritance and if there's any animosity in the family it makes probate (the inheritance process where there is no will) a lot, lot harder.

There are also other considerations like lasting power of attorney that can make things a lot easier but conversely, if not done in time can make your life so much harder.

I'm not trying to alarm you here - but there's an example at the moment with a friend of ours.  Her Dad is disabled, blind, deaf and has some signs of dementia.  Her mother - who is also her Dad's carer - has just had a major stroke and during her hospital stay that she has terminal cancer with a short prognosis.  Our friend and her two siblings are trying to get power of attorney so that they can sort out their affairs but because their Dad has some signs of dementia, they're fighting a battle to try and demonstrate that he has enough mental capacity to sign over lasting power of attorney.  Once somebody is assessed as losing capacity then it can't be signed over and you can't make legal decisions for them.

Conversely, when my Grandmother moved into my parents house a few years ago she signed over power of attorney.  A few months later she started showing signs of dementia and by the end I suspect it wouldn't have been granted.  Because it was granted, dealing with her affairs (including her flat, etc.) was relatively easy.

Lasting power of attorney is only ever needed by the time it gets too late for it to be granted - so if it feels like it's too early for it be discussed, it might actually be the right time.

[myglaren]

I have no will and it is something that I have been considering.  I don't  have much of value and am fortunate in that my kids would never fight over the things they might want, none are in the least avaricious and all get on well with one another.

I did mention it to my son, who's partner is a lawyer and his recommendation was to propose my son in law, a very smart bloke, to act as executor as he has no vested interest in whatever estate may need to be handled.

I think that this is excellent advice, to have an executor someone who is not a beneficiary and can be neutral with regard to all parties and items.

[High Jetter]

10 hours ago, maxxo said:

successful Christmas 

I want to react to that, but couldn't decide if you'd take Congratulations the wrong way. Your grand parents are lucky to have you - and you them, of course.

[Metal Guru]

1 hour ago, GrumpiusMaximus said:

@maxxo if they don't have a will, as others have said, you are in for an absolute World of pain.  It doesn't need to take them long or cost them much to write one.  If everybody gets along and nobody argues, it's not so bad but nothing divides a family like an inheritance and if there's any animosity in the family it makes probate (the inheritance process where there is no will) a lot, lot harder.

There are also other considerations like lasting power of attorney that can make things a lot easier but conversely, if not done in time can make your life so much harder.

I'm not trying to alarm you here - but there's an example at the moment with a friend of ours.  Her Dad is disabled, blind, deaf and has some signs of dementia.  Her mother - who is also her Dad's carer - has just had a major stroke and during her hospital stay that she has terminal cancer with a short prognosis.  Our friend and her two siblings are trying to get power of attorney so that they can sort out their affairs but because their Dad has some signs of dementia, they're fighting a battle to try and demonstrate that he has enough mental capacity to sign over lasting power of attorney.  Once somebody is assessed as losing capacity then it can't be signed over and you can't make legal decisions for them.

Conversely, when my Grandmother moved into my parents house a few years ago she signed over power of attorney.  A few months later she started showing signs of dementia and by the end I suspect it wouldn't have been granted.  Because it was granted, dealing with her affairs (including her flat, etc.) was relatively easy.

Lasting power of attorney is only ever needed by the time it gets too late for it to be granted - so if it feels like it's too early for it be discussed, it might actually be the right time.

I left it too late to get power of attorney over my Dad’s stuff. He signed it (probably shouldn’t have done), but he died before it was issued let alone registered. (This does take some time especially if there are several bank / savings accounts, probably at least 6 months).

Soon as he died, I got it set up for my Mum. We never had to use it, she died quite suddenly without any serious dementia, but it was still useful helping her with financial stuff without being quoted “data protection shit”.

[somewhatfoolish]

4 hours ago, maxxo said:

i understand it's not tat what they have, a lot of it is actually antiques, just no one else realises that so i've promised to care for it all

If they know what they have a list of it all is very useful, it's O/T but if they genuinely are of value the grandparents are probably outside their household insurance limits and wouldn't be covered if the items are not individually declared and there was a fire or burglary etc. Another thing of huge help to the executor is a list of all investments and bank accounts etc, where all the documents are stored and if there are online accounts then account numbers etc.

Totally agree with the above comments about getting LPA set up too, while it can be abused(there are press horror stories) not having it can cause terrible problems too.

[Spiny Norman]

To echo what's been said already, if there isn't a will now, get them to make one. If they don't want to go to an office most solicitors will send round a minion to do it at their home for a modest fee.
What won't be a modest fee is what you'll get if they do die intestate and a solicitor has to get involved in all the legal shizz that follows. If the final bill for sorting it all out isn't into five figures you're doing well.

Also the 'We'll just skip all the stuff in the house when you've gone' people are usually the first to start bickering when someone starts actually going through the deceased's belongings, especially if there's a sniff of profit in it.

It's not a pleasant thing to think about or discuss with anyone, the usual answer of 'It'll not happen for ages, plenty of time yet' only runs for so long.

I hope they still have a long and happy life ahead of them but it never hurts to get these things put in place while they still can.

[beko1987]

Even when they have all their marbles but no health it gets no better. Both my grandparents are 90+ in a big house they should have moved out of 20 years ago. 

Was talking to dad about it earlier and he said there's no point doing anything about it now, when they go it'll all have to be done at once. 

Sheds full of 30+ year old welding gear and old blacksmithing apparatus is in the sheds somewhere. Finding a good home for it all that isn't straight for scrap will be the hardest bit. Most of it will probably be scrap by that time 😂

I hope to leave nothing for the kids to sort bar either sentimental and  keep or bin. 

Another problem is furniture. When my mum goes ill inherit a beautiful 18th century marble top sideboard... Which I'm sure will fit well in whatever tiny flat I can barely afford to be renting when the sad time comes 😢 Same with my grans stuff, pretty much none of us have a big house in the extended family, let alone space for all the nice proper wood early 20th century furniture that will be sloshing around. I can see why so many families just skip alot of stuff and have done with it 

[bramz7]

I was quite done with car buying this year, but the Corolla E10 I've done nearly 1000 miles in has been exhibiting some worrying cooling behaviour as of late...I think the head gasket is going very slowly as there is a distinct hum of coolant in the exhaust and quite a lot of smoke when the engine is at temp (and been at temp for an hour).

Xsara still broken

Mazda is ok, but not good daily driver for my commute (80 miles per day).

So it looks like I now have to panic buy something in my 5 days off. Exactly what I didn't want to do!