The grumpy thread

[Spiny Norman]

Insignificunt driver seems all too typical of a fair percentage of people on the roads nowadays. Zero attention being paid to their surroundings and expecting everyone else to accommodate them.
Hopefully that was a brown trousered wake up call and they'll take a bit more notice in future.

What am I saying, of course it won't. - "OMFG a fucking truck tried to kill me, I was like.....literally just driving along minding my own business and this truck just rammed into me".
 

 

[Spurious]

We did our Blue light course for the ambulances, it was based on roadcraft and their system of driving. A lot of this was positioning yourself on the road and adjusting your speed based on hazards around you. 

Say the car pulling out of the junction who you think hasn't seen you. No point in barreling, albeit with the right of way only to have to take evasive action. No you'll be moving out early, cycling your siren and ready to drop the speed if they don't see you. Morons are everywhere on the road and if they can't see a bloody big ambulance with flashy lights, anyone else doesn't stand a hope. 

Touch wood, it's kept us safe so far. No point getting hurt out on the road, I'd like to get home at the end of the day. 

[High Jetter]

Unfortunately, a very high proportion of the idiots drivers are deaf/blasted out by their 'ICE' 

[New POD]

14 hours ago, wuvvum said:

I'm the other way round - the men on my mum's side tend to go bald early, but that side of the family is late going grey (my mum is 70 and has only just started greying at the temples).  My dad's side they tend to keep their hair but go white.  I'm tending more towards my dad's side.  Probably a good thing - hair dye is cheaper than implants...

What's wrong with embracing the grey? 

What's wrong with going bald? 

It's just normal. 

[New POD]

Wife has got a bee in her bonnet about a member of our extended family, who may need support in the future that the holistically  joined up*  education, social care, benefit system are likely to deliberately refuse to supply.   Every conversation this week has started with a rant at me, which I've realised has nothing to do with the rant and everything to do with a conversation she's just had with someone else. 

Then we've been invited to my parents for new year.  How might that make me grumpy? Well she's had 5 hours to replay what my reaction should be. And the exact words I should use when she tells me. And guess what. I didn't pick those words. 

Added to the fact that I had to have it pointed out that : It might be my dad's last Christmas given that he's 85, and having cancer treatment on his voice box, (they got 99% with a laser and are going to do it again on Wednesday) and is starting to look a bit frail. 

I don't seem to have the emotions that I should have. Yes. It might be his last new year. It might not. Doesn't mean I need to spend new year with my parents.  If he dies, he dies. That's what happens.  It going to happen one day. I'm not going to spend a year grieving. 

This has made me feel like I'm probably not normal.  Is this a normal emotion. I don't actually care enough. I obviously should but I don't. 

[Agila]

3 hours ago, New POD said:

Wife has got a bee in her bonnet about a member of our extended family, who may need support in the future that the holistically  joined up*  education, social care, benefit system are likely to deliberately refuse to supply.   Every conversation this week has started with a rant at me, which I've realised has nothing to do with the rant and everything to do with a conversation she's just had with someone else. 

Then we've been invited to my parents for new year.  How might that make me grumpy? Well she's had 5 hours to replay what my reaction should be. And the exact words I should use when she tells me. And guess what. I didn't pick those words. 

Added to the fact that I had to have it pointed out that : It might be my dad's last Christmas given that he's 85, and having cancer treatment on his voice box, (they got 99% with a laser and are going to do it again on Wednesday) and is starting to look a bit frail. 

I don't seem to have the emotions that I should have. Yes. It might be his last new year. It might not. Doesn't mean I need to spend new year with my parents.  If he dies, he dies. That's what happens.  It going to happen one day. I'm not going to spend a year grieving. 

This has made me feel like I'm probably not normal.  Is this a normal emotion. I don't actually care enough. I obviously should but I don't. 

Don't inflict your wife on anyone.

Leave her at home. When she asks why tell her because she's a "horrible cunt who can't be fucking trusted". Try and do your best Alan Ford impression, glasses optional but recommended.

It maybe your Dad's last Christmas and you don't want her ruining it.

As for your Dad, being realistic and excepting the inevitable doesn't make you heartless.

You will care when it happens, very much so. If you don't then yes there is something very wrong with you.

Good luck.

 

[New POD]

I think my worry is that when it does happen I might not care very much.  Ill think how inconvenient it all is or something equally crass. 

[Agila]

3 minutes ago, New POD said:

I think my worry is that when it does happen I might not care very much.  Ill think how inconvenient it all is or something equally crass. 

Maybe you just aren't that close. You don't have to be. There is no manual on how to be. You don't have to sob every day for hours on end.

For me it was silly stuff that I'd phone and visit my Dad for. Car related things, football stuff, shit jokes I knew he would like.

You'll find your own way with it soon enough. Don't be too hard on yourself either, it's not a competition to grieve.

Go to the funeral, show your respects and that's it.

Anyway, I hope your Dad still has a fair few Christmases left in him. 

[omegod]

First proper night out in 2 years  last night and I drank quite a bit, jesus i'm wrecked  , now got to get a car cleaned an polished for a viewing later and it's pishing down 

Prayers for Omegod please !

 

[Metal Guru]

8 hours ago, Spurious said:

We did our Blue light course for the ambulances, it was based on roadcraft and their system of driving. A lot of this was positioning yourself on the road and adjusting your speed based on hazards around you. 

Say the car pulling out of the junction who you think hasn't seen you. No point in barreling, albeit with the right of way only to have to take evasive action. No you'll be moving out early, cycling your siren and ready to drop the speed if they don't see you. Morons are everywhere on the road and if they can't see a bloody big ambulance with flashy lights, anyone else doesn't stand a hope. 

Touch wood, it's kept us safe so far. No point getting hurt out on the road, I'd like to get home at the end of the day. 

It doesn’t look like the lorry had any option to pull into lane 2, but even when there is , few drivers do it.

My parent’s house is on a busy dual carriageway way. It’s downhill from about 5 miles to there, so even the biggest lorries are doing 70+. 
There is no slip road at all , you have to join the road at right angles from a standing start. However, when waiting at the edge of the road, approaching drivers can see you for at least 1/2 mile, but does anyone ever move into lane 2 , to let you join safely ? No more than 5% , I’d say.

Now I know me joining that road safely is my responsibility and no one else’s , but if you can make live easier for someone  for no effort ,why don’t you?

Similarly, it wasn’t the lorry driver’s responsibility to avoid that crash, but he could have done and was a complete bar steward to do what he did.

 

[junkyarddog]

10 hours ago, Spiny Norman said:

OMFG a fucking truck tried to kill me, I was like.....literally just driving along minding my own business and this truck just rammed into me".

U ok hun?

🤣

[wuvvum]

10 hours ago, High Jetter said:

Unfortunately, a very high proportion of the idiots drivers are deaf/blasted out by their infotainment system

EF2021

[Crackers]

On 20/11/2021 at 22:48, Crackers said:

Bollocks and double bollocks. 

The 14-day sweat starts now. Passed a Piggy Bank on the A27 with 70+VAT dialled up on the speedo. 

Not sure if the  camera van was aimed at mine or the opposite carriageway, but it was in the central reservation so could have been either or both. Bit gutted that I didn't spot it earlier as I'm usually pretty hot on them. 

Oh well, if I didn't get the speed down quick enough, then fair enough, bang to rights I suppose. If it's a speed awareness course then a bit of dented pride, if it's points and a fine, then fuck. 

Today is day 14 and nothing has come through the post.

It's the small wins, etc.

[MikeR]

3 hours ago, omegod said:

First proper night out in 2 years  last night and I drank quite a bit, jesus i'm wrecked  , now got to get a car cleaned an polished for a viewing later and it's pishing down 

Prayers for Omegod please !

 

My turn today to hit town , just waiting for the x2 bus ..and it's pissin down .....

[grogee]

8 hours ago, New POD said:

Wife has got a bee in her bonnet about a member of our extended family, who may need support in the future that the holistically  joined up*  education, social care, benefit system are likely to deliberately refuse to supply.   Every conversation this week has started with a rant at me, which I've realised has nothing to do with the rant and everything to do with a conversation she's just had with someone else. 

Then we've been invited to my parents for new year.  How might that make me grumpy? Well she's had 5 hours to replay what my reaction should be. And the exact words I should use when she tells me. And guess what. I didn't pick those words. 

Added to the fact that I had to have it pointed out that : It might be my dad's last Christmas given that he's 85, and having cancer treatment on his voice box, (they got 99% with a laser and are going to do it again on Wednesday) and is starting to look a bit frail. 

I don't seem to have the emotions that I should have. Yes. It might be his last new year. It might not. Doesn't mean I need to spend new year with my parents.  If he dies, he dies. That's what happens.  It going to happen one day. I'm not going to spend a year grieving. 

This has made me feel like I'm probably not normal.  Is this a normal emotion. I don't actually care enough. I obviously should but I don't. 

Struggling to unpick this one as it's written straight from the heart but I'll have a go:

Wife is stressed because family member won't get the support they need because education and social care has been stripped past breaking point by a decade of brutal Tory austerity. You get the brunt of her frustration on unrelated issues. 

Then, she feels you "should" spend time with your ill father because it might be "last chance". You disagree. 

You're not wrong to feel the way you do, there are no rulebooks written to prescribe how you should behave. Your viewpoint is as valid as your wife's, if not more so (it's your dad after all).

My sympathies and unfortunately I don't have any answers. Except possibly compromise and do a flying visit?

[grogee]

12 minutes ago, MikeR said:

My turn today to hit town , just waiting for the x2 bus ..and it's pissin down .....

 

[Noel Tidybeard]

On 03/12/2021 at 08:59, junkyarddog said:

Or,you know,the car driver could have timed his merge better,sped up and got well in front,or slowed and went in behind,the truck had nowhere to go,seeing as it was being overtaken at the time.

Trucks are heavy old beasts and take longer to stop/slow down.

I think this is firmly the cars fault.

exactly this- they are give way lines on the slip the truck has the right of way

[Noel Tidybeard]

12 hours ago, High Jetter said:

Unfortunately, a very high proportion of the idiots drivers are deaf/blasted out by their 'ICE'  wearing ear buds

efa

 

[hairnet]

View for next hour

[High Jetter]

18 minutes ago, hairnet said:

View for next hour

You didn't reserve a seat?

[paulplom]

1 hour ago, Noel Tidybeard said:

efa

 

I've seen plenty of cyclists with these and headphones on. Total wankers.

How will they hear my horn blasting them out of the way ffs.

[New POD]

9 minutes ago, paulplom said:

I've seen plenty of cyclists with these and headphones on. Total wankers.

How will they hear my horn blasting them out of the way ffs.

If you saw them in enough time to process the idea of pressing your horn, and then actually pressing your horn, you had time to avoid them by braking swerving or both, right ? 

[Zelandeth]

Just very, very, VERY nearly took out a cyclist.

Crossing a 70mph dual carriageway in the dark, wearing all black on a bike with no lights, reflectors etc whatsoever. 

Only reason I saw them about 0.02 seconds before it was too late to swerve around them was that they obstructed the headlights of the oncoming traffic.  Also bloody lucky there was nothing in the overtaking lane so I had room to swerve.

Spent the next 300 yards trying to get the car pointing straight ahead again.

Was literally about 20 metres from an overpass with the off street footway/cycleway on it.  Wish I could say it was the first near miss with cyclists around here.

Not quite as bad as the one a year or so back who was cycling the wrong way up a dual carriageway (again, in the dark with no lights), but this one was probably closer to ending up embedded in my windscreen.

[richardmorris]

24 minutes ago, Zelandeth said:

Just very, very, VERY nearly took out a cyclist.

Crossing a 70mph dual carriageway in the dark, wearing all black on a bike with no lights, reflectors etc whatsoever. 

Only reason I saw them about 0.02 seconds before it was too late to swerve around them was that they obstructed the headlights of the oncoming traffic.  Also bloody lucky there was nothing in the overtaking lane so I had room to swerve.

Spent the next 300 yards trying to get the car pointing straight ahead again.

Was literally about 20 metres from an overpass with the off street footway/cycleway on it.  Wish I could say it was the first near miss with cyclists around here.

Not quite as bad as the one a year or so back who was cycling the wrong way up a dual carriageway (again, in the dark with no lights), but this one was probably closer to ending up embedded in my windscreen.

I’ve no idea why some people do this. My bike has reflectors spoky dokies and multiple front and rear lights. I wear clothes with reflective patches ( and yet still car drivers ignore me).

[captain_70s]

Loads of light/reflectorless cyclists around here, often doing take out deliveries. Red lights optional, pavements fair game.

Nutters.

[Zelandeth]

1 hour ago, captain_70s said:

Loads of light/reflectorless cyclists around here, often doing take out deliveries. Red lights optional, pavements fair game.

Nutters.

Pavement would make more sense than this!

(The streetlights there haven't worked in a couple of years).

Where were they even going?!?

The lower of those overpasses (which are combined footway/cycleways) is directly behind us in the first photo.

[Angrydicky]

Going to score/deal in those trees I’d imagine.

[GrumpiusMaximus]

There's a lane down here on my way back to work that's very dark, narrow and surprisingly busy.  Driving down it the other day, the only reason I realised there was a pedestrian in the middle of the road was that they were carrying a torch.  Black top, dark jeans.  Absolutely lethal.  Got shivers afterwards thinking about what could have happened...

[cobblers]

On my old commute there was a guy who cycled to work at 6:30am on pitch black fast flowing country lanes in dark clothing with no lights, every day. I have no idea how how he survived two winters. At some traffic lights I spoke to him and said "mate, I see you every day on the road with no lights, you're gonna end up killed" and his response was "well you've seen me". About a week later he got a white light and put it on the back of his bike which caused massive confusion. 

[beko1987]

28 minutes ago, GrumpiusMaximus said:

There's a lane down here on my way back to work that's very dark, narrow and surprisingly busy.  Driving down it the other day, the only reason I realised there was a pedestrian in the middle of the road was that they were carrying a torch.  Black top, dark jeans.  Absolutely lethal.  Got shivers afterwards thinking about what could have happened...

One of the driving factors in my going to specsavers a while ago was near miss like this. Driving home one night with a bloody pedestrian walking towards me with a tiny little shitty torch. On the road as theres no path... 

I was going 55 (in a 60, goes into a 40 a few yards further on) and luckily had nothing coming my way so could dive right fucking quickly but if I hadn't I doubt I'd have noticed as I fucking punted him square into death... And it would have been 100% my fault I imagine 

Zero lights, the car behind me gave him a toot as well but fuck me I went cold! Always struggled with blur at night... 

Had a shudder just typing this!