The grumpy thread

[Stanky]

1 minute ago, dozeydustman said:

Guess who forgot to pay a Dart Charge the other day and now has a penalty charge notice to pay.

Arses.

PM Incoming!

[cort16]

Is that paint dry? 
 

No. when will I ever learn?

 

[Zelandeth]

These vans (there are three of them) have been here well over an hour now...Neither neighbour has any idea who they belong to or where the drivers are.

[myglaren]

1 hour ago, Zelandeth said:

These vans (there are three of them) have been here well over an hour now...Neither neighbour has any idea who they belong to or where the drivers are.

They have far too much air in their tyres.

I'm sure they would appreciate if you fixed that for them.

[wuvvum]

...although that could be counter-productive if you want them out of the way as quickly as possible.

[omegod]

1 hour ago, myglaren said:

They have far too much air in their tyres.

I'm sure they would appreciate if you fixed that for them.

Be a shame if all the oil fell out of the sump plug into a drain pan......... usually they get about a mile 

[Jazoli]

There might be a good reason they are there and to be honest the last two posts advocating damaging someone's vehicle isn't what I'd expect to see on here but I guess there are twats everywhere.

[motorpunk]

On 10/13/2020 at 11:57 PM, wuvvum said:

Also, I bought some special Loctite superglue for sticking glass to re-attach the quarterlight catches on the Volvo.  It's fucking useless.  The catch pulled off in my hand as soon as I tried to twist it into the closed position.  WTF did they use to stick the things on at the factory?  I've not been able to find anything that'll hold the bloody thing together for more than about 30 seconds.

I have some 2 part epoxy we use at work, used to fix sensors to steel, subsea. It’s very expensive and tricky to apply, but it will fix anything to anything forever. If you’re passing Leicestershire, I’ll stick whatever for any shiters.

[myglaren]

11 hours ago, Jazoli said:

There might be a good reason they are there and to be honest the last two posts advocating damaging someone's vehicle isn't what I'd expect to see on here but I guess there are twats everywhere.

There may indeed but parking across someone's drive is a twat move at the best of times.  The least they could have done was ask permission if they couldn't find another parking place.

[beko1987]

5 hours ago, motorpunk said:

I have some 2 part epoxy we use at work, used to fix sensors to steel, subsea. It’s very expensive and tricky to apply, but it will fix anything to anything forever. If you’re passing Leicestershire, I’ll stick whatever for any shiters.

That's just crying out for you to bring it to the fod next year/shitefest... 

Epoxy 2 cars together last with its bumper/subframe still attached wins. Bonus points for repairing the losing car for the drive home 

[Aston Martin]

They didn't fit me... And I think it's a racoon.

[mitsisigma01]

Let's try and make the next 111 grumps decent ones, this thread will turn through 100,000 grumpy posts n replies , miserable fuckers 😕

[mitsisigma01]

Sigma is probably dying😢... Clutch possibly gone, other assorted shite little problems added together probably beyond my pocket... 

See my items for sale in non motoring thread 

[SiC]

On 10/5/2020 at 11:45 AM, Fumbler said:

TL:DR- Failed, 4 majors, 7 minors, unsympathetic and unpleasant examiner, rush hour, nerves and a little bit of bad luck. Now I have to go back to college and pretend that nothing ever happened

Could be worse. In my dad's driving test, he did an emergency stop and the examiners glasses came off and smashed. Ultimately failed the test.

Second test a few weeks later, the examiner appears ... same one but with tape around the frame. He failed that test too. 😂

[PhilA]

On 10/13/2020 at 6:42 PM, eddyramrod said:

I feel your pain there!  I haven't found anything that'll stick the rear-view mirror to the windscreen on the Cadillac.... in three years of looking!

 

In other news, Volvo have a lovely new ad running  on the telly, highlighting some sort of radar on their SUVs that tells you if there's traffic coming across your path as you reverse out of your drive.  The strapline is "We're as concerned about your safety as you are" which is a very Volvo thing to say.  Except... if you're even slightly concerned about your safety at all, using as many as one brain cell, you'd be doing what your instructor taught you and reversing INTO your fucking drive!  If you're reversing out you are clearly not concerned with your own or anyone else's safety!  Well done  Volvo, bullet/foot interface there.  Go on, try it in front of Huggy, see what happens.

Funny, they're running that advert here too.

[Remspoor]

Android apps wanting to update every week. It is so annoying. They never inform you what has actually changed either.

 

[PhilA]

3 hours ago, Aston Martin said:

They didn't fit me... And I think it's a racoon.

That's as raccoon as the mediæval pictures of fantastic creatures seen on foreign shores, drawn by fourth-hand description.

Looks more like a weasel

[Soundwave]

Bloody insurance company giving me an affordable quote... then two days later doubling it for absolutely no reason, thus contributing to me missing out on a car because I was trying to root around and find another decent quote. 

[Wack]

What a self centred bitch 

 

 

[High Jetter]

1 hour ago, Remspoor said:

Android apps wanting to update every week. It is so annoying. They never inform you what has actually changed either.

Yup. How much time are we all made to waste by updating stuff? FFS get it right in the first place! I used a Win 7 pro desktop for 10 years without any updates, it worked fine.

[loserone]

I know, we should all go back to having software set when you buy a device so it can't change and slow you down.  Noone ever got infected on Windows 7, and no Android devices are running spambots.  See also, the China virus is a conspiracy to control us all.

 

(What's wrong with just updating overnight when it's on charge?)

[puddlethumper]

This is the reason I don't charge my phone up when I'm asleep.

[MikeR]

Butthole sunning !

What the F is that all about ?

[Wack]

Facebook,

Woman puts a picture of a box for current gen HD recorder £50

I offer the £50 , she replies with a picture of another HD box that's about 5 years old 

It's not the one on the box , it's this one

Right.... What model number is that 

No idea sorry 

OK good luck with that then 

FFS

[somewhatfoolish]

4 hours ago, MikeR said:

Butthole sunning !

What the F is that all about ?

So you look good for the close-up with the proctologist?

[MikeR]

43 minutes ago, somewhatfoolish said:

So you look good for the close-up with the proctologist?

Or his finger ....

[jakebullet]

Bob the fucking builder next door is becoming an even bigger twat. This morning Ma announces I'm to have the joy of running the hedge trimmer over the conifer hedge at the front of the house. In the middle of doing said fun task BTFB appears and says / demands I can come in his yard to cut the end that has grown a full 6 inches into his yard.

Hmm, let me think about it for a minute. You're a bunch of annoying twats. There's feral children + dog roaming in said yard. There's a dog egg every 12 inches as you never take it for walks or clean up after it shitting everywhere. That's a nope then.

Later we notice that he's cut it himself. And has then collected all the clippings and strewn them everywhere along the pavement in front of our house so it looks like we've cut the hedge and just left it on the floor. Must have taken a fair bit of effort to achieve this artistry, you would have to pick it up and bag it without getting dog shit on you, carry said bag thru the minefield and then spread it evenly along the pavement.

Is it petty to play the same game? It's guaranteed every bin day our bin gains a bin liner full of beer cans as an 80 litre recycling bin emptied once a month has no hope against their drinking. We really should return this lost* property.

[Jazoli]

1 hour ago, jakebullet said:

Bob the fucking builder next door is becoming an even bigger twat. This morning Ma announces I'm to have the joy of running the hedge trimmer over the conifer hedge at the front of the house. In the middle of doing said fun task BTFB appears and says / demands I can come in his yard to cut the end that has grown a full 6 inches into his yard.

Hmm, let me think about it for a minute. You're a bunch of annoying twats. There's feral children + dog roaming in said yard. There's a dog egg every 12 inches as you never take it for walks or clean up after it shitting everywhere. That's a nope then.

Later we notice that he's cut it himself. And has then collected all the clippings and strewn them everywhere along the pavement in front of our house so it looks like we've cut the hedge and just left it on the floor. Must have taken a fair bit of effort to achieve this artistry, you would have to pick it up and bag it without getting dog shit on you, carry said bag thru the minefield and then spread it evenly along the pavement.

Is it petty to play the same game? It's guaranteed every bin day our bin gains a bin liner full of beer cans as an 80 litre recycling bin emptied once a month has no hope against their drinking. We really should return this lost* property.

Just put a padlock.on your bin for now...

[red5]

On 10/14/2020 at 12:42 AM, eddyramrod said:

I feel your pain there!  I haven't found anything that'll stick the rear-view mirror to the windscreen on the Cadillac.... in three years of looking!

 

In other news, Volvo have a lovely new ad running  on the telly, highlighting some sort of radar on their SUVs that tells you if there's traffic coming across your path as you reverse out of your drive.  The strapline is "We're as concerned about your safety as you are" which is a very Volvo thing to say.  Except... if you're even slightly concerned about your safety at all, using as many as one brain cell, you'd be doing what your instructor taught you and reversing INTO your fucking drive!  If you're reversing out you are clearly not concerned with your own or anyone else's safety!  Well done  Volvo, bullet/foot interface there.  Go on, try it in front of Huggy, see what happens.

Ford mirror pads or Tiger Seal. Win.

[BorniteIdentity]

6 hours ago, jakebullet said:

Bob the fucking builder next door is becoming an even bigger twat. This morning Ma announces I'm to have the joy of running the hedge trimmer over the conifer hedge at the front of the house. In the middle of doing said fun task BTFB appears and says / demands I can come in his yard to cut the end that has grown a full 6 inches into his yard.

Hmm, let me think about it for a minute. You're a bunch of annoying twats. There's feral children + dog roaming in said yard. There's a dog egg every 12 inches as you never take it for walks or clean up after it shitting everywhere. That's a nope then.

Later we notice that he's cut it himself. And has then collected all the clippings and strewn them everywhere along the pavement in front of our house so it looks like we've cut the hedge and just left it on the floor. Must have taken a fair bit of effort to achieve this artistry, you would have to pick it up and bag it without getting dog shit on you, carry said bag thru the minefield and then spread it evenly along the pavement.

Is it petty to play the same game? It's guaranteed every bin day our bin gains a bin liner full of beer cans as an 80 litre recycling bin emptied once a month has no hope against their drinking. We really should return this lost* property.

He needn’t have left them on the path; he’s legally entitled to cut it and chuck it on your lawn- as long as it’s your hedge and it encroaches over his property. 

Some people will tell you that they MUST return them, as they are legally yours!

In short, grin and move on. He sounds like a right cherub.