What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

14,486 · January 25

Due to the large population and insufficient number of police officers, the Chinese have developed a unique culture of intimidating warning signs:

Road sign: " Please drive safely, there is no hospital nearby."

Office building: "No parking, for any violations we will deflate your tires."

Construction site: "My dear workers, when you are at work, pay attention to safety. In case of an accident, another guy will sleep with your wife, beat your children and spend your life insurance! Work safely, for your own good."

Neighborhood Watch:

"Beware of all thieves! Once captured, you will be beaten from the beginning to the end of the alley. This alley is 786 meters long."

These are genuine warning signs, no joke.

Swiped from Quora.

https://qr.ae/pCVaXN

18,809 · January 26

11 hours ago, myglaren said:

Due to the large population and insufficient number of police officers, the Chinese have developed a unique culture of intimidating warning signs:

Road sign: " Please drive safely, there is no hospital nearby."

Office building: "No parking, for any violations we will deflate your tires."

Construction site: "My dear workers, when you are at work, pay attention to safety. In case of an accident, another guy will sleep with your wife, beat your children and spend your life insurance! Work safely, for your own good."

Neighborhood Watch:

"Beware of all thieves! Once captured, you will be beaten from the beginning to the end of the alley. This alley is 786 meters long."

These are genuine warning signs, no joke.

Swiped from Quora.

https://qr.ae/pCVaXN

I saw a warning sign in Iceland similar to the first sign. It was at a hot spring. It said “Do not touch! Water is 85C , hospital is 65km”.

10,181 · January 26

rescued a friends car today , my wife and her friend went for a walk , parked up , came back and her new leccy car was gone .. and a long walk back home .

cue police calls , driving around looking for it , gave up , took her friend back home ..

had a word with a her daughter who said mums mobile was ringing out , so we logged in and searched for it and bingo ..

was parked up locally in a side road , some distance from where it was left , waiting for a pick up , so we rescued it ....

one very happy person . some right *unts around .

3,985 · January 27

Time for a crooklok, disclok.or some such @MikeR?

If it's gone once, fair chance it'll happen again.

Just make it easier to nick someone else's😕

10,181 · January 27

11 hours ago, CGSB said:

What car was it?

Aside from those keyless relay attacks are some modern cars dead simple to steal still these days?

It was a dolphin surf , we reckon they got followed and code grabbed , parked in a quiet locals now type place so it was out of the way ... Google suggest a few local cars have disappeared..

21,351 · January 27

14 hours ago, MikeR said:

had a word with a her daughter who said mums mobile was ringing out , so we logged in and searched for it and bingo ..

Can you explain what you did here? It mught be useful for someone to know.

As an aside

Linda (the owner) is a ditzy kind of woman who would go for a walk and leave her phone in the glove box.

And your own wife obviously leaves her phone at home. Despite her sister (my wife) telling her to take it just in case of emergencies.

Hence the long walk home.

14,486 · January 27

6,974 · January 27

Just noticed a colleague’s electric VW says GTX on the side… the first thing I thought was Castrol 🤦‍♂️

12,058 · January 27

13 minutes ago, Tenmil Socket said:

Just noticed a colleague’s electric VW says GTX on the side… the first thing I thought was Castrol 🤦‍♂️

I had one of these - it used ELF oil though - don't know if elves piss better than unicorns?

10,181 · January 27

3 hours ago, New POD said:

Can you explain what you did here? It mught be useful for someone to know.

As an aside

Linda (the owner) is a ditzy kind of woman who would go for a walk and leave her phone in the glove box.

And your own wife obviously leaves her phone at home. Despite her sister (my wife) telling her to take it just in case of emergencies.

Hence the long walk home.

all android phones have an account with google , so if you can remember the login details , log into google on a pc for example ..

then manage your account , go to Devices , select your phone , find it .... up pops a nice map .

in our case , the daughter knew the login details , I told her how to work the menu , found the phone , then we all jumped en mass into the cars , base ball bats , pitchforks etc to go and recover the car .. daughter monitored the location in case the car moved ... the car had been left in a side road on the other side of town .

the police were net to useless at first and refused to take a stolen car report as they thought the girls had mislaid the car , or had it towed away ...

the 2nd attempt a report was taken and passed to the anpr team , but communication was difficult with many phone numbers being used and not being answered or busy , the 101 team stuck to following procedures and got arsey because we pinched the car back , contaminating the evidence , despite us only letting the original driver move the car .

so if your car goes walkies , your on your own , if you leave a mobile in the car make sure its hidden , in this case, in a boot , under a load of belongings .

the girls learnt a lot that day about car theft ....

2,135 · January 27

1 hour ago, MikeR said:

all android phones have an account with google , so if you can remember the login details , log into google on a pc for example ..

then manage your account , go to Devices , select your phone , find it .... up pops a nice map .

in our case , the daughter knew the login details , I told her how to work the menu , found the phone , then we all jumped en mass into the cars , base ball bats , pitchforks etc to go and recover the car .. daughter monitored the location in case the car moved ... the car had been left in a side road on the other side of town .

the police were net to useless at first and refused to take a stolen car report as they thought the girls had mislaid the car , or had it towed away ...

the 2nd attempt a report was taken and passed to the anpr team , but communication was difficult with many phone numbers being used and not being answered or busy , the 101 team stuck to following procedures and got arsey because we pinched the car back , contaminating the evidence , despite us only letting the original driver move the car .

so if your car goes walkies , your on your own , if you leave a mobile in the car make sure its hidden , in this case, in a boot , under a load of belongings .

the girls learnt a lot that day about car theft ....

Presumably that would only work if phone has location turned on? And phone is powered?

10,181 · January 27

1 hour ago, jim89 said:

Presumably that would only work if phone has location turned on? And phone is powered?

Yes and yes .

10,181 · January 28

That's Linux Mint installed on the desktop pc instead of win10 , it now kicks arse and even runs Canva without braking a sweat instead of dying .

Printers work , scanner works , access the network ok and sees the nas .

Just user training to do .....

14,486 · January 28

29 minutes ago, MikeR said:

Printers work , scanner works , access the network ok and sees the nas .

Which printers are you using?

I have always bought HP printers as they 'just work' whereas many don't provide Linux drivers.

18,490 · January 28

14 minutes ago, myglaren said:

don't provide Linux drivers

My printer is a nearly 25 year old Dell laser unit, and I was sure i'd have problems getting it working on Linux because it never really played nicely with modern Windows.

The linux driver they provide is for a version of Red Hat from about 2005, and... It works absolutely fine!

It has a built in ethernet print server, so it just hangs off of the same switch as my servers and happily prints from any of my machines. I'm thinking of changing to connecting it to a server with USB and running a print server that way, just so that I can print directly from machines that are on my VPN not just the actual LAN, but I don't want to break anything.

It is also basically free to run, I've bought maybe two toner cartridges in the decade I've had it, and there's always a deal to be had on a box of half decent printer paper.

10,181 · January 28

using a epson wf2935 prints and scans ok

hp P1005 laser jet says its there , says its printing , but nothing turns up , working on it because it used to work

10,181 · January 28

35 minutes ago, myglaren said:

Which printers are you using?

I have always bought HP printers as they 'just work' whereas many don't provide Linux drivers.

answers above due to fumble fingers

10,181 · January 28

37 minutes ago, MikeR said:

using a epson wf2935 prints and scans ok

hp P1005 laser jet says its there , says its printing , but nothing turns up , working on it because it used to work

sorted it thanks to the online helpers ..

https://forums.linuxmint.com/viewtopic.php?t=193863#:~:text=I have LM 17.1 and,nothing happen with the printer.

2,135 · January 28

7 minutes ago, MikeR said:

sorted it thanks to the online helpers ..

https://forums.linuxmint.com/viewtopic.php?t=193863#:~:text=I have LM 17.1 and,nothing happen with the printer.

Forbidden

You don't have permission to access the requested URL on this server.

Is that my end or theirs ?

2,135 · January 28

1 hour ago, myglaren said:

Which printers are you using?

I have always bought HP printers as they 'just work' whereas many don't provide Linux drivers.

Hmmm I've had pretty infuriating experiences with Linux (Ubuntu) & a HP laserjet 5p...

Usually a Ubuntu update borks the fragile setup 🙄😬 & prompts another extensive poke around online for crumbs...

14,486 · January 28

19 minutes ago, jim89 said:

Hmmm I've had pretty infuriating experiences with Linux (Ubuntu) & a HP laserjet 5p...

Usually a Ubuntu update borks the fragile setup 🙄😬 & prompts another extensive poke around online for crumbs...

My last printer, an HP Laserjet, would only work if I emailed the item to HP who then emailed it to the printer.

Worked OK though.

7,383 · January 28

On Saturday I was at an awards evening for the Rallycross championship I do TV commentary for, at which I made a speech and presented a trophy in memory of my girlfriend which the championship committee had very kindly organised.

After I sat back at my table, to my utter shock a picture of me flashes up on the big screen and the championship manager and sponsor called me up to be presented with a "Special award for Services to Rallycross". I was completely stunned and I think it's the first time in nearly 20 years as a motorsport commentator that I have been lost for words.

In addition, there was a Scalextric layout in attendance and I won the fastest lap contest!

1,903 · January 28

Just… this picture

18,172 · January 28

3 hours ago, Pieman said:

After I sat back at my table, to my utter shock a picture of me flashes up on the big screen and the championship manager and sponsor called me up to be presented with a "Special award for Services to Rallycross". I was completely stunned and I think it's the first time in nearly 20 years as a motorsport commentator that I have been lost for words.

Well done, I'm sure it was well deserved. Big fat cheque? 😀

3 hours ago, Pieman said:

In addition, there was a Scalextric layout in attendance and I won the fastest lap contest!

Bloody well done!

12,058 · January 28

Kids.
Youngest has been punting the C220 Estate around for a fortnight to see if she likes it. Turns out a four door estate with a decent boot is much better than a two door Freelander when it comes to baby seats and inserting small passenger into them,
So, a swap was setup and I took her old Freelander to its new home today. On the way I was marvelling at her amazing Inversed Midas Touch with anything mechanical as we creaked and grated our way along in the FreeLander she's had for a whole year.
Then I got to contrast and compare with the 2004 C220 which was full of people, kids and baby stuff :-) - quite a contrast to the 2005 Freelander - I know which one I prefer.

Paperwork setup, hands shook and off she goes with her new possession. Half an hour later 'ping'

How does she do it?

25,941 · January 28

20,643 · January 28

she was doing a makinen on the country lanes?

14,486 · January 29

14,854 · January 29

On 24/01/2026 at 17:48, DavieW said:

Are you from/live in Blairgowrie? I've been there a couple of times to pick up cars back when I was trade plating. Nice little town.

5,337 · January 30

36 minutes ago, Lord Sterling said:

Are you from/live in Blairgowrie? I've been there a couple of times to pick up cars back when I was trade plating. Nice little town.

No. Wife has family there though.

What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

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