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What silly mistakes have you made?


Philyc

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Bought the OH's stilo with a blown head gasket, was in a hurry to have the car ready for her getting out of hospital. Took the head off, the locating dowels stuck in the head, nothing to worry about I'll just hold the head gasket against the head as I lower it down. Made sure the gasket was the right way up, popped it onto the cylinder head dropped it down and rebuilt the engine. Started it up, top end was really tapping, I'll let the oil get through it I thought so I rev'd it a bit and it just sounded worse, took off the oil filler and noticed the cam shaft was going round completely dry of oil. Did a quick google, turns out you can fit the head gasket 180 degrees out, I didn't notice I'd blocked the oil way as I was holding the gasket on the bottom of the cylinder head. Changed it all again and it was fine, didn't swear too much, others online weren't so lucky with seized camshafts and wrecked engines.

 

Same car had always had an oil leak round the back of the block, changed head gasket AGAIN applying sealant round each hole in it, but it still leaked, you couldn't see where it was coming from thanks to the snail shell inlet manifold. Mentioned it on the Fiat forum and someone kindly gave me a diagram showing that there were no oil ways in the back of the gasket so I could rule that out, after I had changed it of course. Another person had the same fault, he eventually solved it when he took the engine out, turns out the middle inlet manifold bolt was missing as it was on mine. The hole for this penetrates into the head so oil can piss out of it if the bolts missing, added a bolt and solved an oil leak that had been going on for over a year! 

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Using blue hylomar to seal the sump gasket on the Meriva. Took 3 months for me to realise this was the issue, and another 4 months to actually fix it, when the oil level dropped to a certain level it didnt leak as much...

 

This then killed the exhaust flexi section with death by burning oil which has still to be replaced, so it blows like shit...

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Put a disc pad in metal face to disc... forgot to put a pair of disc pads in completely ... cut through a petrol pipe when I was welding, repaired it and lost the brakes - yup, brake not petrol pipe and flexi plastic doesn't do the job... lost a rear wheel twice through forgetting to tighten bolts...  jacked a Fiesta up on a bar at the back and bent it so badly the car crabbed for England...

 

Every time because I was talking to someone while working.

 

A mate of mine was rebuilding a Pug 405 engine (wet liners, have I got the right car?)  and was called away by the boss to do a quick job on something else and when he started the pug, noise and smoke and steam and oil and lots of horror as he remembered he'd been halfway through changing the seals at the base of the liners....

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Back in the late 80s - early 90s, my Rover P6B used to love to lunch on electric fuel pumps.  Said pump is above the offside back axle, so you have to lie on your back to change it out.  I got expert* at taking the pump off and putting it back again, and could do it really quickly.

 

Now *expert* is synonymous with getting lazy and forgetful, and one evening, when probably too tired to be tacking the job, I undid the fuel line UPSTREAM of the shutoff tap.

 

Fuel tank was full, so I had to just lie there in a pool of petrol while I got the nuts done up again.

 

TL;DR:  the skin of your back is tender, and petrol burns.

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Changing the clutch years ago, on the street in the FREEZING cold, on my Cavalier SRi130. Forgot to take off 1 of the clips that hold the pressure plate and clutch plate together. Started it up and bang... clip through the side of the box and a growing puddle of oil.

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I bought a locking fuel cap for my Mk1 Mini many moons ago but it didn't quite fit the filler neck. No problem, I'll just file the lugs on the neck a bit. I'm happily filing away metal on metal on the open filler neck and suddenly realise, hmm, maybe this isn't such a clever idea it wouldn't take much to spark. Thankfully nothing happened and I decided to stop there!

 

I've had the lose wheel nut thing and forgetting to put the HT leads back on but neither caused any problems other than head scratching.

 

The most annoying one was trying to scan the ECU of my Seat Toledo using a dodgy copy of VAG-COM. It did clearly state that it should not be used for scanning for airbag faults on cars of a certain age but I did it anyway and lo and behold it zapped the airbag ECU meaning that the light was constantly on. Replacing the ECU was a dash out job and the garage were going to charge £900 to do it  - traded the car in not long after that.

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Overtightened the scuttle panel on Mondeo mk2 during filter change, left something in the way, cracked screen...

 

ooof, that's a harsh lesson.

 

I've mentioned this elsewhere  but mine is Landrover based. Doing a clutch change on a Defender in Gorni Vukuf and rushing it a little bit. The engine went back in surprisingly easy and everything bolted down with no problems at all. Then I noticed the brand new clutch plate on the work bench.

That was a fun evenings work, I can tell you.

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Using a screw down ball joint splitter, it looked to be going off centre but I persevered and gave it some more tension..it flew off and twatted me on the forehead knocking me clean out  

 

Bleeding brakes on my old 190e, hose wasn't going into the jar of fluid so rather than use a longer hose I decided putting my brand new Samsung contract phone under the jar to raise it up was a far better idea, seem's overflowing brake fluid and delicate electronics don't get on that well 

 

I could go on but those two are enough for now

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Buying a certain blue Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme.......... errr, ooops :)

 

Nah, I like it really. 

 

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

 

I took a front wing of a Triumph a few years ago and was tidying up the inner wing with the grinder/flap wheel. Forgot to cover up the windscreen. I'd never seen glass rust before.

 

During same event I nearly ground through the grinders power cable with said grinder.

 

I am safe with power tools. Honest.

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First time I did a coil spring change, was on a Mercedes W123 (up till then any suspension work I'd done was Citroën). Bought a lovely set of leg-style spring compressors and set about trying to make them fit. Due to the spring perch and arm design, they kept moving around and the spring wouldn't stay straight.

 

Tried levering. Tried jacking car up more. Decided to just keep on doing them up. You know how when you're trying to see where the ratchet is and the light's bright outside so you stick your head right into the wheelarch so your eyes adjust? Doing that.

 

*wrench wrench wrench*

 

*scree-clunk*

Hmm. Odd noise. Spring's bulging a bit. Better tighten the other side.

Go to move socket. Very loud bang. Spring is no longer in the car, having whizzed past my face, through the not-as-rusty-as-you-think front edge of the wing, and is now making a sort of ringing bell noise about 20 ft away having pinged off the house and the yard wall.

 

Yes. A coil spring can 'ping'.

 

Won't do a Mercedes without disc tools again - the set i use cost more than that Mercedes did!

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I took a front wing of a Triumph a few years ago and was tidying up the inner wing with the grinder/flap wheel. Forgot to cover up the windscreen. I'd never seen glass rust before.

 

I bet you could sell that technique to people who want rat-look VWs.

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Yeah. Didn't WD do something like that on their rat truck thing. They etch WD onto the side glass using grinder sparks. I started a trend!

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Years ago I did the points on my mate's mkII Fester. All done, tried to start it. Nothing. It wouldn't fire, just churning away on the starter. Mate says it does that sometimes and his solution was to add some extra oil. So he does. Still won't start. Adds a bit more. Same story. Adds more. On and on until he poured a whole 5L bottle in and it still wouldn't fire.

 

Then I spotted I had put the distributor cap on the wrong way round. So I quickly turned it 180 and it fired into life immediately, while smoking the entire street out.

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I was undoing rusted sierra fuel tank bolts with a battery impact gun, one was spinning so I popped my finger through the hole to check that the bolt was spinning inside while pressing the trigger and I found out the hard way that the rectangular captive had broken free, it flailed around taking chunks of flesh from my finger leaving a deep gash and lots of blood

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Rebuilt a p5 Rover v8 engine , fitted it in my Lightweight LR  , ran spot on !  Brimmed the underseat tank at filling station ,and took it for a blast ,, got about 1/2 a mile ,and it goes like stink !!  Then popping and banging ..smoke ..backfire... rolls to a halt ..  Ring a mate ..come and tow me ,its blown up ..

 

"What exactly did you do ? "

I explain..

 

"You're sure you put petrol in it ? "

Quick sniff ..

Ahh.... yes it's diesel.. :oops:.  

Only twats do that don't they?

 

Did petrol in the T4 too !! Idiot..

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I was removing something from the back end of a derelict Vanden Plas Princess 4 Litre R when the leaf spring let go pounding into the concrete about an inch away from my head.

 

I wondered why the brake pedal on my freshly cleaned, fluid changed Sierra went to the floor after numerous pumps, it helps if you fit the rear brake drums.

 

Adjusted the valve clearances on my 1.6 Pinto Cortina, started it up and it sounded like a machine gun.  I have both metric and imperial feeler gauges, setting them to 0.80 and 1.00 mm is a bit different to setting them to 0.20 and 0.25 mm.

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Got my finger stuck in the hole of an aluminium spat on an Austin 1300GT steering wheel while sat at a set of traffic lights in Bolton town centre....then the lights changed. 

It is possible to drive with one hand to your mate's house, only to find that soap, WD40  and grease are useless at releasing a by then swollen digit, and to have to resort to a hacksaw blade to remove bits of very nice ally.

 

Headed for the balcony of a borrowed apartment in Key West late one night armed with a long relaxing smoke and a bottle, it was  around 90f but a slight breeze was blowing in from the open sliding door...good times...until I was met at the threshold of said balcony by an invisible force field that stopped further forward motion. The legs refused to negotiate with brain and kept going, why wouldn't they, invisible force fields don't exist.  The sliding aluminium frame mozzy net that Mrs B had thoughtfully closed after opening the patio door for some ventilation offered little resistance and was very quickly in need of replacement. Not a drop was spilled nor carefully constructed cheroot damaged in this episode of social research. Cost Dollars the day after though.

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Yes. I decided to drive the MX5 the 100 miles to Derby at 5:30 am. By 5:50 am I was phoning the RAC, from the M57. By 7:05 I was sitting nice and warm in a recovery truck. by 7:40 my wife was having a go at me for breaking her car. by 8:05 I was in a 100 mile traffic jam, that starts from the end of my road and finishes in Derby.

 

My mistake ? Not replacing the alternator/water pump belt YEARS ago.

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Fucking hundreds.

 

Forgot to tighten wheel nuts on my brothers civic after some MOT remedial work.

 

Bought ABS pads for a non ABS Fiesta. By the time the pad change came around, the larger pad had cut a deep groove in the disc hub.

 

Forgot to turn the headlights off before attempting to snip the bulb plug leads.

 

Cracked a windscreen trying to pop a rear view mirror on.

 

Stripped the threads holding a Fiesta rear beam to the shock absorber, so fitted a nut and bolt instead.

 

Drove for about 40 miles with a burst brake pipe, blaming the spongy pedal feel on my new shoes.

 

Locked myself in the boot of a saloon Primera, only freeing myself when I found a rust hole big enough to poke my keys through.

 

Bought a Peugeot.

 

 

 

Sent from my SM-G900F using Tapatalk

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