The grumpy thread

[Cavcraft]

Christ knows why (as I always block this sort of shit) but in my Facebook news feed a group called 'I am English and proud' has popped up. Two or three stories in and they're clearly even more fucking stupid and hateful than the others that went before them. I started typing a reply out to one of their moronic posts, but sacked it off and blocked them instead.

[Talbot]

Fucking bastard wanking cockwomble of a car.

 

It's a diesel mercedes.  A bloody diesel mercedes is not supposed to break down.  They are supposed to go on for ever and ever and ever and never need any work at all, right?

 

Failed O-Rings in the fuel injection pump means all the fuel drains back to the tank when the engine is off, there's no hand primer, so you just have to crank the fuck out of the engine until the tiny little plunger pump manages to drag fuel the 4 miles it is from the fuel tank up to the injection pump.

 

Except the battery is tired, so it will only crank for about 15 seconds before expiring.  Jump start it, cranking for what feels like a month, and it eventually splutters in to life.  To reveal that overnight the exhaust has gone from "gas tight" to "leaking like a bastard".  It sounds a bit throaty at idle and not too bad up to 1500rpm, but above that is droneing like a shithead.

 

And the rear suspension has *one* flat suspension sphere.  So one side rear suspension is hard as fucking nails, and the other side is soft.  That makes for some interesting handling.  Plus the rot that I need to weld up in the driver-side front floorpan. Fuckit.  I think this one is going to be an engine donor.  The rest can go nose-first in a skip.

[Eddie Honda]

What's an "airport"?

 

...Er, sorry, I meant 

 

a) Aerfort Bhaile Átha Cliath.

 

b ) An aeroway station for aerobuses.

 

c) Nah, Luton Airport!

[HillmanImp]

Working from home. Can't do work effectively with just the one monitor so order another from Argos for £100, same day delivery.

 

Monitor arrives 15 minutes after I've finished work. Friggin' typical.

 

Try and plug it in anyway as I will be working from home again soon no doubt.

 

Only 1 output.

 

FML.

[Pillock]

What USBs have you got? You can get a fairly cheap USB3 to HDMI converter that appears to Windows as another graphics card so you get full dual monitor support.

[HillmanImp]

What USBs have you got? You can get a fairly cheap USB3 to HDMI converter that appears to Windows as another graphics card so you get full dual monitor support.

 

Really? That sounds like the shizzle I need as I have, er hang on.......9 of them and only 3 are used. Is there owt else I need to get to make it work? 

[Des]

 

It's a diesel mercedes.  A bloody diesel mercedes is not supposed to break down.  They are supposed to go on for ever and ever and ever and never need any work at all, right?

 

 

Sir, it is the year 2017 currently, NOT 1985, please adjust your calenders / Casio watch accordingly.

[Pillock]

Really? That sounds like the shizzle I need as I have, er hang on.......9 of them and only 3 are used. Is there owt else I need to get to make it work? 

 

Make sure they're USB3 - they'll have a blue bit of plastic in the middle. Anything less than USB3 (erm... 2 and 1) isn't fast enough.

Have you got a desktop PC then? Might be more reliable to just lob another graphics card in - those USB converters work, but are typical Chinese electrics lottery. Mine works fine though.... just a bit slow.

[HillmanImp]

Tis a desktop. Might give one of them a try first. Doesn't need to be fast. One screen is for doing, the other is for looking. If it doesn't work I might look at the more expensive option.

 

Thanks. 

[beko1987]

512mb graphics cards are pennies, just make sure there's a pcie slot free, although a pci cars will prob do for displaying windows, office, the internet etc

[Parky]

Interview tomorrow. Need a job but seriously can't get my head in the right space.

 

Might be because I am doing a sales project on a contract basis and it's not going that brilliantly this week and starting to get me down. I will be alright in the morning, just needed a moan.

 

Last interview I had was with a complete c*nt and it has sort of put me off them! Tomorrow's is a two hour job, video conference with two guys in Seattle and then a chat with a guy in the office. Fairly intense so need to get my head straightened up. Maybe I just need some kip.

 

Daughter is munting on about Christmas, wife is working late and son is moaning I haven't done dinner. Probably not helping my urge to lash out!

[chaseracer]

All the best with that, Parky 

[Parky]

Yeah cheers. Think a nice long walk and a fag is in order, that usually helps

[HH-R]

Work has been so stressful this past few weeks, I've been having palpitations and a chest so tight I can hardly breathe for days.

 

Keep telling myself that in the grand scheme of things it doesn't matter, and there's no point in having a stroke over it, but of course the mind doesn't work that way.

[hennabm]

Resurfacing the road here; Again.

Fucking hell, they hadnt got round to re-painting the white lines since they were done last time, but here they are again.

Its the usual shit job of spraying piss-thin tar then dumping hundreds of tons of gravel, leveling it out a little and just fucking leaving it like that for the traffic to press the gravel down and push the excess into the ditch over the next six months. Motorcyclists fucking love it.

 

 

The half-assed job they do really, really annoys me, but what gives me the proper fucking rage is the whole "we have to spend the money on something...." attitude. Also, I obviously have no proof but I will eat my shoes if there isnt some backhanders going on between the surfacing company and the local authority.

 

Earlier this summer they "resufaced" the wee lane right in front of my house. It apparently cost about five grand to do not even 100 meters..... the bit they are re-doing this week is about 6 kilometers....... and the cunt of a mayor gets to trot out his standard reply to any request..."There is no money in the budget for that..." aye, thats because you have pissed it all away on utterly pointless road coverings you wanker.

So it's not just the UK then? Standard procedure here. Just had a section done in our village. The fact that the road was/is full of bumps and potholes didn't bother them; they just didn't bother and so it is now bumpier than ever but covered in stones.

 

I wonder if you spilt a load of stones from a truck and just let them, the council would soon be after you. But call it "resurfacing" and you can leave as many tons of crap on the road surface as you want.

Plus the windscreen companies love it as th 20mm stones they use here really cause a lot of damage.

[AlabamaShrimp]

Interview tomorrow. Need a job but seriously can't get my head in the right space.

 

Might be because I am doing a sales project on a contract basis and it's not going that brilliantly this week and starting to get me down. I will be alright in the morning, just needed a moan.

 

Last interview I had was with a complete c*nt and it has sort of put me off them! Tomorrow's is a two hour job, video conference with two guys in Seattle and then a chat with a guy in the office. Fairly intense so need to get my head straightened up. Maybe I just need some kip.

 

Daughter is munting on about Christmas, wife is working late and son is moaning I haven't done dinner. Probably not helping my urge to lash out!

Is it with Clem Fandango and Danny Bear?

[strangeangel]

Resurfacing the road here; Again.

Fucking hell, they hadnt got round to re-painting the white lines since they were done last time, but here they are again.

Its the usual shit job of spraying piss-thin tar then dumping hundreds of tons of gravel, leveling it out a little and just fucking leaving it like that for the traffic to press the gravel down and push the excess into the ditch over the next six months. Motorcyclists fucking love it.

 

 

The half-assed job they do really, really annoys me, but what gives me the proper fucking rage is the whole "we have to spend the money on something...." attitude. Also, I obviously have no proof but I will eat my shoes if there isnt some backhanders going on between the surfacing company and the local authority.

 

Earlier this summer they "resufaced" the wee lane right in front of my house. It apparently cost about five grand to do not even 100 meters..... the bit they are re-doing this week is about 6 kilometers....... and the cunt of a mayor gets to trot out his standard reply to any request..."There is no money in the budget for that..." aye, thats because you have pissed it all away on utterly pointless road coverings you wanker.

 

There are many on here who rant, but few who can match the quality and ferocity of your arguments, Dave_numberz.

 

More power to your elbow, Sir.

[Cavcraft]

Interview tomorrow. Need a job but seriously can't get my head in the right space.

 

Might be because I am doing a sales project on a contract basis and it's not going that brilliantly this week and starting to get me down. I will be alright in the morning, just needed a moan.

 

Last interview I had was with a complete c*nt and it has sort of put me off them! Tomorrow's is a two hour job, video conference with two guys in Seattle and then a chat with a guy in the office. Fairly intense so need to get my head straightened up. Maybe I just need some kip.

 

Daughter is munting on about Christmas, wife is working late and son is moaning I haven't done dinner. Probably not helping my urge to lash out!

 

Good luck, chief!

[sheffcortinacentre]

The British gas "rewards" ad has just been on again, fuck off with your free cuddly toy,etc if you've made that much profit just drop the price of your gas!

[purplebargeken]

Sorry mate but 'Mystic Fucking Ken' just made me nearly puke laughing. 

 

Today was mostly made very irritating by wankers who appear utterly unable to comprehend what 'one way' actually fucking means.

[Talbot]

Sir, it is the year 2017 currently, NOT 1985, please adjust your calenders / Casio watch accordingly.

It's a 1996 model, so closer to 1985 than today. But yes, I take your point, this is not a W123 300d by any stretch of the imagination.

 

*walks off, muttering about 'progress'*

[clayts450]

Streetshite got coated in a shitty film of crap this afternoon following cricket-wrecking torrential downpours in Notts.

 

The rain seemed to lift up all the loose mud and sand which lies around in the filthy, pot-holed, dark and creepy car park I dump the car in for work each afternoon (off Alfreton Road anyone who knows it - essentially a demolition site masquerading as a car park) and flung it at the exterior surfaces and windows of any vehicle belonging to the poor saps who parted with £2.40 for a day's quality* parking.

 

No amount of screenwash or frantic scrubbing of the windscreen rendered anything more than 5% visibility. Reminded me of the old days when there were no heater blowers in cars and you drove along with a 10p size worth of ice-free windscreen which you stuck your face to and relied upon for all round vision.

 

Essentially most of my drive home was like this:

 

.

[M'coli]

...Er, sorry, I meant

 

a) Aerfort Bhaile Átha Cliath.

 

b ) An aeroway station for aerobuses.

 

c) Nah, Luton Airport!

Luton...? I think I remember going there in 1999 to get to Abersheep...but still, no Dyce.

[wuvvum]

I am now officially in my late 30s.

[Parky]

Is it with Clem Fandango and Danny Bear?

"You can shut the fuck up Clem Fandango! With your made up name!"

[Cavcraft]

To be honest, Talbot, the 1990's were about the years Merc's reliability and build quality plummeted quicker than a greased anvil lobbed off Beachy Head.

[chaseracer]

I think they practised with my 300E...

[Exiled_Tat_Gatherer]

Interview tomorrow. Need a job but seriously can't get my head in the right space.

 

Might be because I am doing a sales project on a contract basis and it's not going that brilliantly this week and starting to get me down. I will be alright in the morning, just needed a moan.

 

Last interview I had was with a complete c*nt and it has sort of put me off them! Tomorrow's is a two hour job, video conference with two guys in Seattle and then a chat with a guy in the office. Fairly intense so need to get my head straightened up. Maybe I just need some kip.

 

Daughter is munting on about Christmas, wife is working late and son is moaning I haven't done dinner. Probably not helping my urge to lash out!

 

Dude, hope you got your head on straight....... and it went well enough. Keep us posted.

 

As an aside - how old are the kids then? My treasure* (actually he really is at the moment) is already being shown the workload he has to undertake to earn his weekly allowance etc... and is helping with meal prep to a certain extent. If the kids are (I started at 5) old enough then can't they learn the age old lesson of - you're hungry - get off your butt and help get it (or other things done to leave you free) sorted then? Of course if they're toddlers then you can just tell me to FRO!

If teenagers - a decent horsewhip or liquid suspended over precious electronics would also act as incentive

 

Best of luck on the job front

[xtriple]

Puncture. Bugger, and indeed, damn! Went out to the KIA of much indiference to wander up to the shop and the back tyre is as flat as a witches tit. Good job I always wander round the cars before I get in or I'd have missed that and ruined a tyre. Had to take the Mazda instead which is not really a hardship apart from the fact I (currently) have to roll out on to the floor to exit yon heap which is no fun when:

A, it's raining.

B, when the dogs are in the car 'cos Chester jumps all over me the fat sod!

 

I wonder how long it'll be before I bother to get it fixed?

[Lankytim]

I am now officially in my late 30s.

Happy birthday Wuv! Slippery slope to death from now on I'm afraid.