The grumpy thread

[captain_70s]

Stuck behind some old duffer for miles going slow as fuck, then when I overtake, he finds the accelerator. No doubt he will have done it because I'm a dangerous driver!1111!!1 and wanted to teach me a lesson!!1111! for wanting to do 60 on a ruler straight road in perfect visibility, doesn't matter about nearly causing a head on. Of course he dropped down to doing about 40 after. I hate driving.

The other day I overtook a Transit minibus that was bumbling along at 45mph, nice clear and otherwise deserted A-road on a minor corner, road markings agree overtaking is acceptable. I pass and Mr Transit beeps the horn and flashes the lights repeatedly in an animated manner with the sort of hand in air gesture that says "what are you doing you maniac?".

 

I was tempted to blast off into the distance, turn around and crash into him head on at 110mph but the lead foot driving would reduce my 42.8 avg mpg.

[warren t claim]

Missed the postman trying to deliver a recorded letter yesterday morning so attended sorting office at 7:30am this morning as instructed. Obviously the lazy cunty fuck cunt cunts couldn't be arsed to get my letter back to the sorting office as promised so I'm now having to miss out on today's sleep. I sincerely hope all their children grow up to have very small cocks. Including the girls.

[strangeangel]

FFS. Australian ebay pool ball buyer is back a fucking gain.

 

First he tell me the thread size is 14.5 mm. No it isn't you retard.

Then he says it's m10 x 1.5 which actually makes sense! Okay buy it.

No! send me an invoice.

I can't send you an invoice. hit buy it now.

send me an invoice.

************

no.

He buys it now, and pays.

I go drill the fucking thing, and come back to another message. I'm ripping him off. 2 balls are £10 delivered, and I'm charging him £11 for one. So send him two.

Point out yet again that it's 99p for a ball with no holes in it. £5.99 if you want it drilled.

 

Think fuck it, bang it in an envelope, mark dispatched,

 

Anyone betting tomorrow he wants to know where it is?

 

The point I've marked in your conversation is where I would have blocked him from bidding and stopped answering his messages.

 

I probably lose one or two decent bidders going all 'Block first and ask questions later', but life's a lot simpler for not having to deal with fuckwits like him.

[fordperv]

Some scrote has damaged the mirror on mrs fp's car in the night, there was a group of spunkys in their late teens walking up that I saw who cause trouble about, I'm 99% sure it was them, one of them I see about by the shops and is easily recognisable, mrs fp has told me I'm not allowed to have a word I'm bloody steaming

[Christine]

One good fist says a thousand words

[strangeangel]

One good fist says a thousand words

 

But remember - revenge is a dish best served when there aren't any witnesses.

[fordperv]

One good fist says a thousand words

I agree and thats the type of word it would end up being, that's why she won't let me confront them, she reckons they would just run to the police and try and have me done, which means I also lose my job, she doesn't think a £10 mirror glass is worth it

[HH-R]

The other day I overtook a Transit minibus that was bumbling along at 45mph, nice clear and otherwise deserted A-road on a minor corner, road markings agree overtaking is acceptable. I pass and Mr Transit beeps the horn and flashes the lights repeatedly in an animated manner with the sort of hand in air gesture that says "what are you doing you maniac?".

 

I was tempted to blast off into the distance, turn around and crash into him head on at 110mph but the lead foot driving would reduce my 42.8 avg mpg.

 

Pretty good MPG in a petrol Honda! I only get about 34-37 with a 1.4 but I think it's all the crappy town driving I do rather than OMG maniac. That, and I'm overweight so the A/C is on overtime.

[beko1987]

The power steering in the ZX is getting worse, it's very notchy now, and there's a lot of resistance trying to turn, if I 'turn' against the resistance a few times it eases up for a bit, then goes back to being almost not power assisted at all (although I have never driven a non-PS car so no idea what it feels like) It has fluid in, although most of it is 'conditioner', should I get that out and put proper PS fluid in? I'm not 100% sure it's not a joint or something failed, but when they all clonked their arse off when I got it the steering was still feather light.

 

Will have a look tomorrow and see.

 

I noticed this because I've just been to Henley to get a hoover from freecycle, which turns out is missing some parts so fucked off about that too

[chaseracer]

...I've just been to Henley to get a hoover from freecycle, which turns out is missing some parts so fucked off about that too

 

Let me cheer you up a bit.

 

I have the ancient Hoover Junior in the back of the Blingo and I'm currently negotiating to see whether my sister can drop it off to you on her way back to THAT LONDON on Sunday, via the ageing parents in Malvern.

 

[Chas4545]

The other day I overtook a Transit minibus that was bumbling along at 45mph, nice clear and otherwise deserted A-road on a minor corner, road markings agree overtaking is acceptable. I pass and Mr Transit beeps the horn and flashes the lights repeatedly in an animated manner with the sort of hand in air gesture that says "what are you doing you maniac?".

 

I was tempted to blast off into the distance, turn around and crash into him head on at 110mph but the lead foot driving would reduce my 42.8 avg mpg.

Are you sure the road markings agree overtaking on the bend is o.k. ? Of course hazard broken white lines are slightly  longer than normal broken white lines. I slow right down when I approach hazard lines so that the 300 cars behind me stay safe. It makes me feel good.  Seriously though, its the arm waving and fist shaking that is daft, just be glad you are all safe  and carry on. Saying that I've lost two relatives to really silly seemingly minor accidents.

[beko1987]

Let me cheer you up a bit.

 

I have the ancient Hoover Junior in the back of the Blingo and I'm currently negotiating to see whether my sister can drop it off to you on her way back to THAT LONDON on Sunday, via the ageing parents in Malvern.

 

Oooh that is cheery! Happy to meet her somewhere to save her coming all the way into Thame, will she be on the m40 at all?

 

The problem with my fault is if I google 'Citroen ZX Heavy Steering' all I get results for is xantia or xm heavy steering, which will be completely different. May have a go at removing and re-fitting the aux belt at the weekend, see if that makes a difference! But the car has to be driveable on Monday to go on holiday

[chaseracer]

...will she be on the m40 at all?

 

Yes - which is enough to warrant leaving this in the grump thread!  What's the nearest service area, or could she meet you just off the motorway?

[beko1987]

The M40 isn't that bad! I could meet her at Oxford Services if you/she likes? Or she could come off at J6 and I'll meet her in a layby (that sounds wrong)

[myglaren]

 

Pretty good MPG in a petrol Honda! I only get about 34-37 with a 1.4 but I think it's all the crappy town driving I do rather than OMG maniac. That, and I'm overweight so the A/C is on overtime.

 

 

 

I never managed to get more than 32 mpg out of mine - never got any less either, no matter how it was driven, which defies all the laws of cars and things.

The C5s have been the same until recently, now crept up to 37 andabit mpg

[jakebullet]

Idiot sister has been dumped. Turns out the holiday to New York they'd booked for 5 weeks time at a cost of several bags has been paid for in it's entirety by idiot sister. As well as the other 5 or so holidays for the rest of the year.

 

No, I'm not grumpy that her life is now shit n she's out £kerching. I'm grumpy 'cos Ma is doing the usual oh what a disaster, a boo hoo hoo crap. And I've got to live with it. Ma will also be expecting me to sit around the house and watch her mope, when it's been a full week without Kinky girl. So I'll be the most evil bastard on earth for going to Kinky's palace of love.

 

TL DR:

Fucking idiot sister.

[Jazoli]

Idiot sister has been dumped. Turns out the holiday to New York they'd booked for 5 weeks time at a cost of several bags has been paid for in it's entirety by idiot sister. As well as the other 5 or so holidays for the rest of the year.

 

No, I'm not grumpy that her life is now shit n she's out £kerching. I'm grumpy 'cos Ma is doing the usual oh what a disaster, a boo hoo hoo crap. And I've got to live with it. Ma will also be expecting me to sit around the house and watch her mope, when it's been a full week without Kinky girl. So I'll be the most evil bastard on earth for going to Kinky's palace of love.

 

TL DR:

Fucking idiot sister.

 

Sounds like you need to move out pronto.

[Parky]

I don't know who is worst Jake, your family or your customers!

[jakebullet]

Idiot sister never learns. This is the third bloke in a row where she's had a billion things booked in advance and it's gone tits up. She then doesn't go to the things that are booked, or flog them on where possible (concert tickets etc). Idiot in her case is an earned title.

[STUNO]

Try being sympathetic so you and kinky girl can score a free holiday in new York.

[Cheggers]

Have we had a holiday roffle before? 😉

[DVee8]

Try being sympathetic so you and kinky girl can score a free holiday in new York.

 

 

Exactly what i was thinking.

[Tamworthbay]

What is it with idiots in range rovers? Just been to pick up my daughter from a brownies disco and parking is chokka as usual, a few of us have parked across the entrance of the factory next door as its closed and won't be an issue. Donkey in a range rover decides to just pull in behind the car parked on the road which means he is half way on the road and half way across my car. I politely point out that he can't leave the car there as it is blocking me in, his response - 'why what are you going to do about it', I point out that I will leaving whatever and if his rear end looks different, oh well'. He then states that it will be on my insurance, I point out that a, he is parked illegally (although I probably am as well) and b, where are the witnesses? Or is he going to stand there and leave his daughter...... Muppet finally susses that he isn't going to win so calls me a wanker and moves his car. My wife and daughter arrive and I drive off, only to see the imbecile is now parked blocking an entire car park and giving it the big man to a woman in a micra because she is trying to leave. Why? Just twat. One life - pond life

[Timewaster]

There is something about Range Rovers - newer ones anyway.

 

I saw an Overfinch in town today (parked in the pedestrian area) in a lovely metallic blue with reasonably subtle wheels and an inviting looking leather interior.

 

Did I think, "ooh nice" or "I'd love one in a few years when they are worth buttons"?

 

No. I thought "Prick!" I never saw the owner, but I bet I was right.

[Cavcraft]

In the spirit of Autoshite I'd probably go on holiday with your sister if she wants.

[cobblers]

Jesus wept, I've just been ripping some wiring out of my house cos I'm doing the kitchen. It's getting rewired professionally but I'm just going through running cables for the new sockets and wragging the old stuff out to fill the hole etc.

 

Anyway, it's got a wooden Wylex fuse box, installed at least 40 years ago. There's two 16A fuses. One feeds 5 or the 6 sockets in the kitchen, and also the entire rest of the house.

The other feeds a single socket in the corner of the kitchen. The circuit is ran with Aluminium cable, which after the socket then goes down the wall diagonally behind the plaster, behind the skirting board all round the room and up two flights of stairs (literally up each stair under the carpet) to the single socket in the back corner of the attic. 

 

There's also a wire coming out on the wall adjoining our neighbours that use to power some old lights in a kitchen cabinet, but I think it's powered off nextdoors electric because it's still live even when I take every fuse out of our box.

[Junkman]

They do say that if alcohol was invented today it would be a class A drug. Having seen the effects of alcoholism on people, I'm inclined to agree

 

I'm actually less obnoxious when I'm plastered.

[Tamworthbay]

Jesus wept, I've just been ripping some wiring out of my house cos I'm doing the kitchen. It's getting rewired professionally but I'm just going through running cables for the new sockets and wragging the old stuff out to fill the hole etc.

 

Anyway, it's got a wooden Wylex fuse box, installed at least 40 years ago. There's two 16A fuses. One feeds 5 or the 6 sockets in the kitchen, and also the entire rest of the house.

The other feeds a single socket in the corner of the kitchen. The circuit is ran with Aluminium cable, which after the socket then goes down the wall diagonally behind the plaster, behind the skirting board all round the room and up two flights of stairs (literally up each stair under the carpet) to the single socket in the back corner of the attic. 

 

There's also a wire coming out on the wall adjoining our neighbours that use to power some old lights in a kitchen cabinet, but I think it's powered off nextdoors electric because it's still live even when I take every fuse out of our box.

Just cap it off and leave it, or have a very friendly chat with the neighbour!

[cobblers]

They're absolute dirtbags so I'm more inclined to reinstall an immersion heater tbh

[hairnet]

There is something about Range Rovers - newer ones anyway.

 

I saw an Overfinch in town today (parked in the pedestrian area) in a lovely metallic blue with reasonably subtle wheels and an inviting looking leather interior.

 

Did I think, "ooh nice" or "I'd love one in a few years when they are worth buttons"?

 

No. I thought SIx Cylinders got one of them RUUUUUUN AWAY QUICK

 

 

CHRISTOPHER _ THIS IS A JOKE