The grumpy thread

[clayts450]

Got a broken arse from a drink-related injury I assume, when I was out on the pop with some colleagues. Hurts to sit, stand and lie down, and goes right down to my left foot.

More grumpy about the inevitable piss-taking which will occur tomorrow, but at least I'll find out what I did. I suspect trying to sit down on a non-existent seat and banging the left side of my bum on something hard.

[somewhatfoolish]

5 hours ago, omegod said:

I got absolutely savaged by mossies in Tunisia last week, 30 + bites, no repellent made a difference but luckily I had antihistamines aplenty which saved the holiday, one poor bugger had 200 ish bites 

I've been affected by mossies before, the worst was in Croatia a few years ago I ended up covered in lumps and sought relief from the chemist, who despite linguistic barriers knew exactly what the problem was when I rolled up my sleeve! Industrial strength anti-histamines stopped the itching and the lumps were away in short order.

[gm]

got stopped for driving like a c**k, 3 points and £100 fine  

[loserone]

Just now, gm said:

got stopped for driving like a c**k, 3 points and £100 fine  

Where at?

[gm]

in a bad mood after a shite day at work, booted it away from the lights in the toon in the rain and failed to spot the police van just round the corner I was sliding round

"I thought it would be some teenage arsehole driving like that"

[Lord Sterling]

4 minutes ago, gm said:

in a bad mood after a shite day at work, booted it away from the lights in the toon in the rain and failed to spot the police van just round the corner I was sliding round

"I thought it would be some teenage arsehole driving like that"

Don't worry mate. I got clocked twice at the same spot a couple of weeks apart. The second time was the day I lost my job so other things were on my mind.

[gm]

yep, I know what you mean, I've had a pretty rough couple of weeks and needed to blow off steam, just chose the wrong time / place to do it 

the cops were ok, they knew I felt like a twat and didn't milk it. 

[320touring]

Only another 9 points to level up to Bus Wanker:)

Bummer:(

[gm]

30 years of clean license up the farter though  

[320touring]

6 minutes ago, gm said:

30 years of clean license up the farter though  

A shame:(

[dozeydustman]

I would like to know where 3 fucking bog rolls have disappeared to overnight. Got a 4 pack yesterday on way home, half a sodding roll left.

[Rovorsche]

An MOT fail isnt a biggie, everything is fixable but during the emissions test on the K11 and many many many revs, something let go.

The water level is fine but the temperature shot right up and the test was abandoned.

It was fine on the way over, warmed it up and did a few brake tests, gauge was dead centre all the time.

But now the water pump is rattling like a bastard and I think the cams are clattering away too.

 

This might be decision time to persevere or fuck it off

Plus points - Sills are not rusty, Sun roof isnt currently leaking, its yellow

Minus points - Everything else
 

 

Will look again when the bloody rain has stopped

[GrumpiusMaximus]

Serving out my notice at work.  Everything I do is tinged with the conclusion that it's utterly fucking pointless...

[loserone]

1 hour ago, GrumpiusMaximus said:

Serving out my notice at work.  Everything I do is tinged with the conclusion that it's utterly fucking pointless...

There's a lad here on his last week.

 

I think he's probably the most productive member of staff I've dealt with so far this week.

[Lord Sterling]

FFS! I suppose I've had it easy with my journey to my old place of work which consisted of long fast roads and a motorway journey. 

Travelling into Birmingham today was an absolute NIGHTMARE. It at the best of times but when a spot of rain appears, everyone seems to suddenly get scared and jump in the car clogging up the roads even more. Inevitably, there is always someone who doesn't know how to drive on the wet causing an accident and thus tailbacks. Half of my journey into work consisted of back roads and even then I was 10 mins late. Mind you, only one person was in on time and the rest had major problems on the trains so I was the second one in!

[barefoot]

I've been watching a repeat of the first series of Charlie's Angels - 1970's jiggle TV at it's very finest.

My grump is of course Madonna. Until she came along, no-one wore a bra & if they did it was hidden & you spent ages working out if there was an undergarment involved or if they really were that perky. Then fucking Madonna turns up and every fucker is wearing underwear as outerwear. Progress my arse.

[flat4alfa]

On ‎9‎/‎22‎/‎2019 at 10:34 PM, gm said:

got stopped for driving like a c**k, 3 points and £100 fine  

It could easily have been 6 points and Undue Care stamped on your licence so they let you off really

[flat4alfa]

2 hours ago, barefoot said:

I've been watching a repeat of the first series of Charlie's Angels - 1970's jiggle TV at it's very finest.

My grump is of course Madonna. Until she came along, no-one wore a bra & if they did it was hidden & you spent ages working out if there was an undergarment involved or if they really were that perky. Then fucking Madonna turns up and every fucker is wearing underwear as outerwear. Progress my arse.

Before Madonna we had Melvyn Hayes though

'Meet the gang cause the boys are here'

[Tadhg Tiogar]

2 hours ago, barefoot said:

....My grump is of course Madonna. Until she came along, no-one wore a bra & if they did it was hidden & you spent ages working out if there was an undergarment involved or if they really were that perky. Then fucking Madonna turns up and every fucker is wearing underwear as outerwear. Progress my arse.

 

1 minute ago, flat4alfa said:

Before Madonna we had Melvyn Hayes though

'Meet the gang cause the boys are here'

[TataBobu]

2 hours ago, barefoot said:

Then fucking Madonna turns up and every fucker is wearing underwear as outerwear.

I blame Superman for that.

[Wack]

On 9/22/2019 at 10:42 AM, omegod said:

I got absolutely savaged by mossies in Tunisia last week, 30 + bites, no repellent made a difference but luckily I had antihistamines aplenty which saved the holiday, one poor bugger had 200 ish bites 

20 years ago we went to Cyprus , went up in the mountains, stopped at the viewing area and it was like lunch has arrived, they were everywhere, gave up, drove a mile , got out, not one to be seen

[Garythesnail]

5 hours ago, GrumpiusMaximus said:

Serving out my notice at work.  Everything I do is tinged with the conclusion that it's utterly fucking pointless...

Get used to the fact that any and all fuck-ups that come to light in the next 12 months will all be your fault because you were useless*.

[155V6]

A woman came into work today,just after going on a speed awareness course.Obviously she hadn't been listening properly,because apparently,all vans are only allowed to do 60 on dual carriageways and motorways.This includes any car-based van,& any type of campervan ?

[NorfolkNWeigh]

12 minutes ago, 155V6 said:

A woman came into work today,just after going on a speed awareness course.Obviously she hadn't been listening properly,because apparently,all vans are only allowed to do 60 on dual carriageways and motorways.This includes any car-based van,& any type of campervan ?

That she wasn't listening is a distinct possibility, but it could be that patronising old git that last patrolled a motorway when he was driving a Wolesley 6/110 or his oppo, invariably an Advanced** driving instructor , spouted this shit to her.

some of the crap these people come out with ( magnetic sensors that can identify individual cars ,every 100 m on every bit of Smart motorway ,that automatically set the overhead signs, for instance)  beggars belief .

I'm sure the only reason the twat on my ' Motorway Awareness' course got the job was because he worked for free, just so he could preach bollocks like he did when he had a uniform. 

[Lord Sterling]

5 hours ago, Lord Sterling said:

FFS! I suppose I've had it easy with my journey to my old place of work which consisted of long fast roads and a motorway journey. 

Travelling into Birmingham today was an absolute NIGHTMARE. It at the best of times but when a spot of rain appears, everyone seems to suddenly get scared and jump in the car clogging up the roads even more. Inevitably, there is always someone who doesn't know how to drive on the wet causing an accident and thus tailbacks. Half of my journey into work consisted of back roads and even then I was 10 mins late. Mind you, only one person was in on time and the rest had major problems on the trains so I was the second one in!

?

Didn't realise that Birmingham was being turned into Venice with amount of rain that had fallen this morning. So...er...hmmm.

?

[Noel Tidybeard]

On 9/23/2019 at 5:05 AM, dozeydustman said:

I would like to know where 3 fucking bog rolls have disappeared to overnight. Got a 4 pack yesterday on way home, half a sodding roll left.

wimmin

[Mally]

1 hour ago, 155V6 said:

A woman came into work today,just after going on a speed awareness course.Obviously she hadn't been listening properly,because apparently,all vans are only allowed to do 60 on dual carriageways and motorways.This includes any car-based van,& any type of campervan ?

Have also been on a course and she is partially correct.

Vans can do 50 on single carriageways. 60 on Dual carriageways as she said, and 70 on motorways unless towing a trailer.

Some types of car based vans are exempt.

They tell you correct information, but there's a lot of it to absorb.

[puddlethumper]

Bloody Tesco self checkout, I only have a basket with about ten items, coz I'm

single and, not particularly, sad, and every time it stops and tells me help is on the way.

Everything was beeping through nicely up to then. Wait for help. Three items later 

the same shit. 

The other crap bit about these machines is that when I put my banananas 

on the scale, coz I do like a nana, it tells me to pick my favourite or have a browse.

HAVE A FUCKIN BROWSE ???   Oh yeah, I'll have a browse and hold up the queue

while I go off to the fruit and veg to get something that I missed when in the fruit

and veg part earlier. I'm checking out FFS.

[anonymous user]

I no longer use the self scan after my last argument with one. I'm pleased that the bossy, condescending ones have now gone from my local B and Q. The Tesco one tried to charge me twice for something. I had scanned it and put it in the "bagging area" the bloody thing kept telling me to place item in bagging area, I told it that I already had and it kept on at me, so I told it "look, I'll get it back again" and as soon as I showed it the item,"look here it is" it scanned it again, bastard thing.

[omegod]

A" Friend " of mine buys his Sunday newspaper and substitutes the spaffy tv mag for any greeting cards he needs for upcoming occasions,self scanning saves himself a fortune he says