What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

19,897 · July 28

July 28

Well heres some more of matey's C280 news for you all!

Took it to a garage today which didn't go well - waiting for space to put the car didn't materialise so we went home fairly dejected.

Out of some anger, I did some stomping on the carpet where the CANBUS lives, then pulled the carpet up where it splits and pushed the cables towards its connector as far as I could.

We went back into the car, and then thought hang on, the fan (which would run nonstop) wasn't running. Hang on, it's reading the outside temp. HANG ON THE INDICATORS ARE WORKING?

Turns out sheer anger got the CANBUS working again!

At a later date we'll have the carpets etc out and give it all a good push and clean but as of right now the car is 100% and everything is functioning!

Here it is all polished up and after a semi thorough test drive to ensure it's all functioning fine - you can see the 1 series behind it, preparing to cook up a world class borkage...

3,080 · July 28

The ML500 failed it's MOT. No dramas though, a set of new rear springs and she's passed. WINNER. 😊

Not bad for a 'Mouldy' bag of shite (insert other negative things)

24,331 · July 29

I've a suspicion this txt message I received is a scam!

24,331 · July 29

Phishing I’ve heard of , what’s smishing?

32,484 · July 29

Same thing but SMS

24,331 · July 29

Anyhoo, I’m a man with no children, pretty sure it’s a scam!

15,963 · July 29

34 minutes ago, richardmorris said:

Anyhoo, I’m a man with no children, pretty sure it’s a scam!

You sure? It's ok, if you want to share 🤣

15,665 · July 30

4 hours ago, richardmorris said:

Anyhoo, I’m a man with no children, pretty sure it’s a scam!

I’ve had several like that, but as I only have one child, I can recognise the number. If I had 3 or more, I probably wouldn’t , and would have replied to see who it was.

Definite scam.

7,826 · July 30

14 hours ago, richardmorris said:

I've a suspicion this txt message I received is a scam!

Could you sign that number up to several online continuous news update txt services in Japanese to help?

19,897 · July 30

19,897 · July 30

@Skizzer

13 minutes

2,827 · July 30

Bad News...... the 12V battery in my granddaughter's little pink jeep has died.

Good news.... her dad has wired in one of his 18v Milwaukee tool batteries and, much to young madam's enjoyment, it will now GLF🤪

12,054 · August 1

15,665 · August 1

37 minutes ago, myglaren said:

Also near the end of Bell Island. There’s also Come by Chance , it’s like the set for a Carry On film Ffs!

10,966 · August 1

10,966 · August 1

On 30/07/2025 at 09:49, castros_bro said:

Could you sign that number up to several online continuous news update txt services in Japanese to help?

Plus the Jehovas, Viagara sales and maybe some other weird shit.

3,961 · August 1

Round at my folks last night and Mum says "do you have any of the man that died's records?". That'll be Ozzy then. 😄

12,054 · August 2

Quote

The RAF has appointed Suraya Marshall to the rank of Air Vice-Marshal. This means that there are now two Marshal Marshalls in the force, as her husband Allan Marshall is Air Marshal Marshall.

9,499 · August 2

Started Xmas shopping today ....

15,665 · August 2

19 minutes ago, MikeR said:

Started Xmas shopping today ....

That should be in the grumpy thread.

19,897 · August 2

@wuvvum

15,963 · August 2

2 hours ago, MikeR said:

Started Xmas shopping today ....

For yourself, I hope?

8,979 · August 3

Purchased some ex army overalls as fancied a pair for work and rolling around under cars too.

They have someone elses name in them are pre dirtied with a small hole in the knee.

I really like them. Enough to try lose a bit of weight so they fit properly.

19,733 · August 3

Well I found this interesting

21,544 · August 3

been playing through GTA 4 again, and in that game you occasionally get NPC's tending to broken down cars leaning over smoking engine bays on the side of the road

spot the problem? developer oversight much? :mrgreen:

29,789 · August 4

This is so weird and shit that it's good. And the teenage hole thing gave me a laugh.

9,864 · August 4

My wife just sent me a screen shot from her FB. I think she's trying to tell me something......

12,054 · August 4

Stolen from another site.

Only in Britain – Complaints to Councils and extracts of letters written to them:

1. It's the dog's mess that I find hard to swallow.

2. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.

3. I wish to complain that my father twisted his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.

4. Their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence.

5. I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was bad wind the other day that blew them off.

6. My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?

7. I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from the wall.

8. Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.

9. I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.

10. 50% of the walls are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster, and 50% are just plain filthy.

11. I am still having problems with smoke in my new drawers.

12. The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.

13. Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny colour and not fit to drink.

14. Our lavatory seat is broken in half and now is in three pieces.

15. I want to complain about the farmer across the road. Every morning at 6am his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me.

16. The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.

17. Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third, so please send someone round to do something about it.

18. I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night.

19. Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife.

20. I have had the clerk of works down on the floor six times but I still have no satisfaction.

21. This is to let you know that our lavatory seat is broke and we can't get BBC2.

22. My bush is really overgrown round the front and my back passage has fungus growing in it.

23. He's got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can't take it anymore.

15,665 · August 4

1 hour ago, myglaren said:

Stolen from another site.

Only in Britain – Complaints to Councils and extracts of letters written to them:

1. It's the dog's mess that I find hard to swallow.

2. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.

3. I wish to complain that my father twisted his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.

4. Their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence.

5. I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was bad wind the other day that blew them off.

6. My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?

7. I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from the wall.

8. Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.

9. I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.

10. 50% of the walls are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster, and 50% are just plain filthy.

11. I am still having problems with smoke in my new drawers.

12. The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.

13. Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny colour and not fit to drink.

14. Our lavatory seat is broken in half and now is in three pieces.

15. I want to complain about the farmer across the road. Every morning at 6am his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me.

16. The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.

17. Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third, so please send someone round to do something about it.

18. I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night.

19. Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife.

20. I have had the clerk of works down on the floor six times but I still have no satisfaction.

21. This is to let you know that our lavatory seat is broke and we can't get BBC2.

22. My bush is really overgrown round the front and my back passage has fungus growing in it.

23. He's got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can't take it anymore.

Can’t argue with any of them except dog shit which is always a sticking point.

What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

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