What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[cort16]

Unfortunate. 

 

 

http://www.mandatory.com/2015/12/15/texas-plumber-suing-car-dealership-after-his-old-truck-ends-up-w/?ncid=txtlnkusaolp00002185

[meshking]

Clearly, my mechanic is winning at life.

 

[Taff]

I paid TEN PENCE for this at the charity shop today:

 

 

I'll probably read it at some point, but for now I'm still admiring the bleak title and cover artwork.

 

I dare you to type out the entire contents of that book, format it nicely into a new "thesis" and then do the rounds of the telly, blarting on about how you could cure broken Britain.

 

dare you

[M'coli]

Grin 1) it looks like I've sorted out digs near Midsomer Norton for my new job, and grin 2) there was a red Sierra dolly-towing a yellow mk3 Cortina (looked project material) down the M18 towards the M1 today.

[Lacquer Peel]

Clearly, my mechanic is winning at life.

 

The wheels and tyres on the silver Frontera are awful, vans and 4x4s never look good on big alloys and low profile tyres.

[NorfolkNWeigh]

 

Used the e30 as the junction box for outside lights and had a socket spare.

[hairnet]

i could tell how much tread was left on the front facing part the front tyre of a 15 plate pug 208

 

from 15 feet behind it

 

[gm]

I was supposed to be going Christmas shopping this afternoon, the weather was fairly mild so I took the mazda - and made a fifty mile detour round the back roads with the roof down. I love that little car - it's just such simple fun

 

The shops were surprisingly quiet when I eventually got there so managed to get everything done in under an hour - just a quick trip to the supermarket for some wine and beers and Christmas is all organised

[richardmorris]

Had a Christmas card from some Muslim friends - ex 2cvers. The card is from www.muslimsforpeace.org.uk and www.loveforallhatredfornone.org.

 

 

 

I'd sent them a card from the ashmolean in Oxford- titian's madona and child.

[anonymous user]

Grin 1) it looks like I've sorted out digs near Midsomer Norton for my new job, and grin 2) there was a red Sierra dolly-towing a yellow mk3 Cortina (looked project material) down the M18 towards the M1 today.

Do be careful, watch out for a bunch of piquantly assorted eccentric characters living there, avoid all village get-togethers, group activities and local societies and hopefully you will avoid being murdered.

[michael1703]

Was singing along to comfortably numb as I was loading my jag up with a 6ft length of sheet metal and as I sung the line "there is no pain you are receiving" managed to smack my head on the gutter. I pissed myself with the irony

[chaseracer]

... currently watching '2001....'

 

There is NO film since... That Is All

 

"What are you doing, Dave?"

 

"I'm trying to sort out a dodgy earth in your logic generators, you irritating bag of spanners.  Now shut the fuck up and let me think."

 

"I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that." 

 

"What's the problem?" 

 

"I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do." 

 

"What are you talking about, HAL? Your readout displays are lit up like a fucking Christmas tree and there is no Haynes Book of Negotiable Truth that fully covers the 9000 series.  You might as well be a fucking Citroen CX."

 

"I know that you're planning to disconnect me, and I'm afraid that's something I cannot allow to happen." 

 

"Where the hell did you get that idea, HAL?"

 

"Dave, this conversation can serve no purpose anymore. Goodbye."

 

"MY GOD.... IT'S FULL OF SHITE...."

 

 

[richardmorris]

Open the pod bay doors Hal. I don't want to do that Dave. Prescient c5 experience there!

[Parky]

I reckon Kubrick flogged all the HAL technology to Renault after filming finished, where it sat in a storeroom gathering dust until the engineers found it just before starting work on the Laguna II engine management....

[fordperv]

This picture posted by someone on the blue forum as a reply to something I said

 

 

Not only is his kitcar chassis strapped to the roof of an accent, the accent is JRG, what a winner

[steve_earwig]

I reckon Kubrick flogged all the HAL technology to Renault after filming finished, where it sat in a storeroom gathering dust until the engineers found it just before starting work on the Laguna II engine management....

Akchwally, HAL was instructed to lie, that's why he/it went bonkers, so I reckon he's been employed over at VW.

 

I know I've made some very poor decisions recently, but I can give you my complete assurance that my work will be back to normal. I've still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in the emissions.

[Parky]

Is that Vivian Stanshall in your avatar?

[steve_earwig]

Er, yep. Well spotted.

 

Sir Henry belches loudly

Lord Tarquin: I say! How dare you belch in front of my wife??!

Sir Henry: Sorry old man, didn't know it was her turn.

[Craig the Princess]

Anyone want to buy a white Vauxhall Nova?

[beko1987]

Is it mildly barried?

[Cavcraft]

I sacked off two thirds of a meeting yesterday (and cost myself about £30 in doing so) then breezed in towards the end and scored a massive work related victory.

[jakebullet]

Cunning scheme of buying loan parts on funding secure and flipping them for 2% more on the secondary market has broken the £9 profit barrier. Doesn't sound much, but I'm only cycling the same few hundred quid round. If I could be arsed to keep it up for a full year I'd be looking at a return of 40%. Beats chuff all interest in the bank.

[Keymaster]

[Taff]

Do be careful, watch out for a bunch of piquantly assorted eccentric characters living there, avoid all village get-togethers, group activities and local societies and hopefully you will avoid being murdered.

 

My folks live there. You speak with 100% accuracy

[coalnotdole]

Double grin, Work has shutdown for christmas and I'm off now until the middle of January. Also this morning a car transporter came and took the spare rebel away so I now have a spare space in a garage!

It was this one in case anyone was wondering:
 

Be like CoalNotDole but without the boat
http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/1974-Reliant-Rebel-Van-Tax-Exempt-project-find-classic-car-mini-barn-/231745200928?hash=item35f5172320:g:QOcAAOSwwbdWPhsq

Now all I need to do is sell the nicer blue van!

[dollywobbler]

Just had a remittance advise telling me a sizeable invoice is going to be paid before Christmas. On the day my insurance renewal is due in fact! That takes some pressure off. 

[Tam]

Diesel at 99.9p And 103.9p for unleaded. Cost was less than the amount!!

[Timewaster]

^^ That's a cock up Shirley?

[Richard]

99.8p for both here, also at a not supermarket.

[xtriple]

101.9 here today.