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What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread


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Posted

^ Until I maximised the picture, I thought the character on the label was actually holding a poo that he intended to kick :-D

  • Like 1
Posted

Freedom!

This makes me happy to be alive.

 

This morning I had to pick up a lady from Heathrow T5 at 9 O'clock , beforehand I took a guy down at 5, so made sense to park up and have a kip/ watch I-player( how has no one on Shetland noticed Perez has gone from a £300 52 reg V70 to a brand new V90 ?)

Anyway woke up went into the carpark, parked in my usual spot on the deserted 2nd floor, the relevance of which will become apparent.

Obviously this was about time for my morning poo, especially after an hours kip in the car.

Went into the nice clean toilet, in the quiet bit of the carpark remember.

Phone buzzes, " I'm through, just getting coffee do you want one?" Timing perfect.

Go about my business, turn handle to unlock door, and...

Nothing! It just spins not attached to anything.

Trapped in the bog, I give the door a shove, it's massive and VERY solid, I kick it , nothing.

I notice a red rubber strip around the wall- it's an emergency call button- I push it, a siren starts up, quite deafening inside the toilet.

Nothing happens.

I start yelling and shouting- nothing.

I start kicking fuck out of the door, bits of frame fall down, the handle comes off- the door doesn't budge.

Phone rings, it's my passenger, " Where are you"

I explain.

She laughs, a lot .

I then explain where exactly I am.

10 minutes later , the door opens.

It's her, she rescued me!

To make matters worse, the first thing she says is" That must have been awful, it stinks in there "

I said " Yes it was like that when I went in there" !?!

"Mmmmm" says she...

Posted

Freedom!

This makes me happy to be alive.

 

This morning I had to pick up a lady from Heathrow T5 at 9 O'clock , beforehand I took a guy down at 5, so made sense to park up and have a kip/ watch I-player( how has no one on Shetland noticed Perez has gone from a £300 52 reg V70 to a brand new V90 ?)

Anyway woke up went into the carpark, parked in my usual spot on the deserted 2nd floor, the relevance of which will become apparent.

Obviously this was about time for my morning poo, especially after an hours kip in the car.

Went into the nice clean toilet, in the quiet bit of the carpark remember.

Phone buzzes, " I'm through, just getting coffee do you want one?" Timing perfect.

Go about my business, turn handle to unlock door, and...

Nothing! It just spins not attached to anything.

Trapped in the bog, I give the door a shove, it's massive and VERY solid, I kick it , nothing.

I notice a red rubber strip around the wall- it's an emergency call button- I push it, a siren starts up, quite deafening inside the toilet.

Nothing happens.

I start yelling and shouting- nothing.

I start kicking fuck out of the door, bits of frame fall down, the handle comes off- the door doesn't budge.

Phone rings, it's my passenger, " Where are you"

I explain.

She laughs, a lot .

I then explain where exactly I am.

10 minutes later , the door opens.

It's her, she rescued me!

To make matters worse, the first thing she says is" That must have been awful, it stinks in there "

I said " Yes it was like that when I went in there" !?!

"Mmmmm" says she...

 

Just as well a certain Forum member with a penchant for having a dump hadn't been in there before you, wha'?

Posted

Took the Saab in for its MOT, and since last year the garage have replaced the cold MOT viewing area with the installation of cameras in both the MOT area and in the pit, so I could see exactly what the tester was doing from the comfort of their sofa in their lovely reception area. Pass achieved, no advisories.

 

Been a good MOT day, with copious amounts of free coffee too.

  • Like 3
Posted

Freedom!

This makes me happy to be alive.

 

This morning I had to pick up a lady from Heathrow T5 at 9 O'clock , beforehand I took a guy down at 5, so made sense to park up and have a kip/ watch I-player( how has no one on Shetland noticed Perez has gone from a £300 52 reg V70 to a brand new V90 ?)

Anyway woke up went into the carpark, parked in my usual spot on the deserted 2nd floor, the relevance of which will become apparent.

Obviously this was about time for my morning poo, especially after an hours kip in the car.

Went into the nice clean toilet, in the quiet bit of the carpark remember.

Phone buzzes, " I'm through, just getting coffee do you want one?" Timing perfect.

Go about my business, turn handle to unlock door, and...

Nothing! It just spins not attached to anything.

Trapped in the bog, I give the door a shove, it's massive and VERY solid, I kick it , nothing.

I notice a red rubber strip around the wall- it's an emergency call button- I push it, a siren starts up, quite deafening inside the toilet.

Nothing happens.

I start yelling and shouting- nothing.

I start kicking fuck out of the door, bits of frame fall down, the handle comes off- the door doesn't budge.

Phone rings, it's my passenger, " Where are you"

I explain.

She laughs, a lot .

I then explain where exactly I am.

10 minutes later , the door opens.

It's her, she rescued me!

To make matters worse, the first thing she says is" That must have been awful, it stinks in there "

I said " Yes it was like that when I went in there" !?!

"Mmmmm" says she...

 

Did you at least badly draw a penis on the door whilst you were in there?

  • Like 4
Posted

Currently in Malaysia (Langkawi) and had to buy a bottle of this for the name alone.

It was ok, but hardly poo kickin or particularly joyous ... image.png

Was it a long ass fucking time ago?

  • Like 1
Posted

Decent weather and half-term giving me about a bit of flexibility about what I drive means I'm going for the full 5/5 commuting experience. Don't think I've done it in February before......................

 

3/3 so far this week. I had started the 1200 Tuesday evening to make sure the battery still had some life in it, but that was as far as my post-winter check procedure went.

 

It coped just fine with suddenly being pressed into use, and was very enjoyable to drive. It gets up to a somewhat noisy indicated (and probably optimistic) 55-60 quite nicely so it's fine on the local roads. Created a bit of interest/amusement amongst one or two people on site.

 

The contrast between that and the RX I'm going to use today is dramatic. That's 3-4x the weight of the 1200, 5x as powerful and about 1000x more complex.

Posted

Bees make me grin

Zoe Ball's dad was on her show this morning talking about maths

 

Something he said about bees left me gobsmacked , they know maths , when they build a hive each hexagonal wax segment is made up of 120 degree walls so they slot together and its angled down at 36 degrees so the honey doesn't run out.

 

Also when one finds a good source of food it flies back and gives directions to where it is , a step to the left or right then a wiggle of its bum tells them how far to fly , more wiggles the further it is

 

Utterly amazing

  • Like 9
Posted

I went out on this and a mate on a ZXR10

 

It was sunny. We went far and quite fast.

 

post-3776-0-45400500-1550774512_thumb.jpg

 

 

I got home and was a trampoline for my two lads.

 

Now I'm off to play 6-a-side.

 

:-)

 

 

Posted

Zoe Ball's dad was on her show this morning talking about maths

 

I bet he didn't explain his "Think of a Number" insurance premium figures.

Posted

3 of these arrived today.

All thanks to the internet arrived under 24 hours of ordering.

 

post-26181-0-14500200-1550782205_thumb.jpg

  • Like 2
Posted

Reading the "What makes you grin ? Antidote to grumpy thread " thanks all .

  • Like 2
Posted

Reading the "What makes you grin ? Antidote to grumpy thread " thanks all .

All of them? Wow, well done man!

Posted

When I first realised I'd got tickets to see a female Tommy Cooper/Monkees tribute act, I was sceptical.

 
 
But then I saw her fez.
Posted

The Scottish parliament looks so much more fun than hours, doesn't it?

  • Like 2
Posted

I've used this garage for 20 years or so. I rang yesterday morning for a service and mot on our 2006 V70. They said just to bring it down. My partner dropped it

about 12. they rang at 3 asking if I was picking it up! full service, mot, new rear discs and pads and they were busy welding the exhaust as the receptionist was talking to me. There's a few garages could take a lesson from that. If I have issues with my van they drop everything to get it sorted. It's like a formula one pit crew watching them.

 

 

https://www.facebook.com/pages/category/Automotive-Repair-Shop/Barrington-MOT-Centre-657190807717963/

 

It's worth having a look through their page at some of the stuff they do. There's a defender with the 'dreaded disease'.

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