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Posted

38 quid for day insurance to go collect my new 406.

 

Thats two-thirds the cost of the car.

 

FFS.

  • Like 1
Posted

Whoops it seems to have got very cold and I'm running 100% veg... Just chugged around the caravan park, best put some Dino juice in for the way home on Friday unless it warms up

Posted

At Camelot, we always aim to provide the highest possible standards of service. To help us improve these standards, we would appreciate your completion of our short customer satisfaction survey, by either clicking on the link below, or copying and pasting it in to your Browser’s Address Bar. Thank you.

 

http://survey.national-lottery.co.uk/Community/se.ashx?s=2EA0F6793F09767A&EmailID=mmgarw

The capital E seems the culprit, try: http://survey.national-lottery.co.uk/Community/se.ashx?s=2EA0F6793F09767A&emailID=mmgarw

Posted

We had girls at our school

Mine too, although I was never cool enough to get any.

  • Like 1
Posted

It seems Omegas are the automotive equivalent of herpes right now.

 

I want to make space for a proper piece of shite. I've got two potential candidates but I can't make a move on either until the Omega shifts. :(

Roffle?

 

In other news: One of my cars runs out of MoT today and will need significant work before it passes another; one is due for taxing because it's the end of the month, and the other one runs out of insurance next week.  Oh joy.  Oh and I'm in for two Roffles being drawn tonight so I could conceivably have two more to add to the pile!

Posted

Bollox ... At the end of my garden i built a big shed up against my fence 10 years ago . I could  fit a  car in it but there's only 4ft access up the side of my house ..The other side is a storage yard (friendly enough people ) little plots rented out to builders and the like ..and a concrete pad right behind my shed , and vehicular access :-D .... I wanted to rent it ,remove a bit from my fence ,and extend my shed even bigger into the plot  for my Fiesta. Just been round to see them about cutting down a rapidly growing tree on our boundary , and someone else has just rented it for a few hundred a year . And he's delighted to have got it ...I bet he is  :-(

Posted

Thanks.

 

 

 

At the risk of getting slagged off by even more people - the problem was never with loading up the survey, as I have explained several times, I was able to access the survey, but received an error upon trying to submit it.

 

This led me to conclude the error wasn't to do with the link.

 

I have tested it with upper and lower case today, and it's now OK, which leads me to suspect it was something at their end that someone they care about has noticed or reported.

 

I'm really not trying to be a twat about this (although it seems some would disagree).

Posted

Generic grump about people who can't drive in snow. Just had to drive around a 118d that was stranded on a slight incline and a Copper S on laggy band tyres on a slope. In both cases I just gently drove around them.

 

Hope whoever has entirely blocked the A1 at Doncaster isn't badly hurt though.

Posted

I hate the muzak they play on Wheeler Dealers. It's like... torture to my eardrums.

 

They're playing it without any kind of a decent restraint; totally beyond the pale of any acceptable human conduct, and it has to be terminated with extreme prejudice.

What the fuck are you doing watching that dross in the first place anyway? :P

 

The worst thing, in my opinion, about Wheeler Dealers is Mike Brewer. I can't stand him.

  • Like 3
Posted

Mine too, although I was never cool enough to get any.

 

The young lady leaning attractively on the Minx convertible seems to like you...

 

;)

  • Like 2
Posted

I don't really understand the massive hate Wheeler Dealers generally gets.

 

Its informative, as entertaining as "watch a man do a transmission fluid change on a 20 year old car" programme can be, and it allows people to see that a lot of jobs that need doing on cars aren't THAT hard, encouraging people to have a go keeping their car running.

 

Alright Brewer over eggs it a bit but I'm sure he's asked to ham it up a bit for entertainment value. At least he seems passionate abouts the "motahs" they work on.

I'd happily watch Ed China work on cars all day long.

 

I just cannot stand Mike Brewer and his over-hamming of things for any length of time. That and the fact that he comes across as a lazy ungrateful twat in the way he buys utter heaps then dumps them on Ed's doorstep to do all the hard work.

  • Like 1
Posted

I don't really understand the massive hate Wheeler Dealers generally gets.

 

Its informative, as entertaining as "watch a man do a transmission fluid change on a 20 year old car" programme can be, and it allows people to see that a lot of jobs that need doing on cars aren't THAT hard, encouraging people to have a go keeping their car running.

 

Alright Brewer over eggs it a bit but I'm sure he's asked to ham it up a bit for entertainment value. At least he seems passionate abouts the "motahs" they work on.

Me neither, the earlier shows were a bit bodgey but it's nice to see old(er) motors on the telly getting a bit of love and not smashed up for a change.

 

I even watched and enjoyed the ones about cars I normally have no interest in (e.g the Audi TT), it was interesting to see them fix quite cheaply a problem that I'd have ran away from.

Posted

Dear Mr PBK, you need to renew your licence and can do so online!

 

Wayhey! Tap, tap, tap. nearly there 'Please enter the 10 or 11 digit number on the back of your photocard licence'.  Fuck off, there's no number there. There's just a fucking bar code. Electron microscope (reading glasses) deployed. Ah, so there is a number. Could they have made the fucker any smaller? I mean really? It looks like a fucking smudge. Twats. Show said number to Ben and he just rattles the fucker off. 

 

I hate the young!

Posted

Here's my little rant - why does everything have to be tied into contracts, and why do technology companies rape you over it?

 

I discovered my gym signed me up this year on a contract - it's £35 a month and I can't cancel. Does nobody move to another location, or end up in a situation where they can't afford or use the facilities of a service offered up under a contract?

I had Virgin internet in my last place, I really reluctantly signed up to a 12 month contract which was £20 a month. I checked my balance not long ago and they were suddenly charging me £35 a month. I don't trust these twats with their contracts and billing. I moved recently and Virgin said they couldn't transfer my internet (at a £20 charge) so I would have to pay £240 to cancel. Naturally I told them where to stick their cancellation charge.

 

When I was with Three on an IPhone 4, I had unlimited data, it was fantastic, and I just used the phone as a modem and connected my PC to it. £35 a month - for my punishment, I am now with Vodafone with my Iphone 6 which I bought last year in May - on a 24 month contract. It's convenient more than anything, you can phone etc without the worry of running out of credit, but I didn't take into account that a 2GB data limit would be gobbled up within a couple of weeks, unless you just want to use your phone to read 1mb text files for entertainment. I'd love to go on YouTube or use sat nav, but your data limit will be up within a week. You could watch 20 10 minute videos on YouTube on 2GB, and I've got another year of this. What a mess.

 

I've had an EE dongle which is pretty crap, but after the bollocks of contracts, I've gone back to this now again, and I'll top it up £28 a month and have 16GB without a contract, which I can then attach my phone to. Even the internet activation doesn't work and I really don't know how much money I've paid as I currently have a 512MB plan it says, and I've paid £28. So something's gone wrong, and the EE shop add on page doesn't work (it says 'come back later' but it was saying that three days ago).

I should've just gone into the EE shop, paid £28 and said 'do this for me please'.

 

This all boils down to sending work off to an employer who is getting tired of the 'my internet isn't working', as I can't send anything to them - I'm on the verge of tearing my hair out over this - I fucking hate technology, it's great when it works, but when there's so much handshaking and protocol, especially over the net, it rarely does.

 

I could put all my work on my laptop and take it to my mum's and use her internet, but my laptop has just bit the dust. In theory I could transfer it to either my IPhone or IPad, which is literally a computer, but Apple don't allow that.

 

As you can see from the attached screenshot, I have used nearly 50MB in the past few minutes - 10% of my monthly allowance.

 

Fuck it all in the arse!

 

post-3738-0-94100600-1461790476_thumb.png

  • Like 3
Posted

Had that issue with daughters phone. Ended up paying another couple of quid a month to increase the data use to 4gb. Sometimes that's not quite enough but the bills are generally a bit smaller

Posted

Trying to sleep in a cramped freezing van. Not happening. Plus this bloody thing being a diesel takes ages to warm up. All this because the company I picked it up from couldn't be arsed to tell us that it was in the garage having work done which made me late for it's delivery.

Posted
Here's my little rant - why does everything have to be tied into contracts, and why do technology companies rape you over it?

 

I discovered my gym signed me up this year on a contract - it's £35 a month and I can't cancel. Does nobody move to another location, or end up in a situation where they can't afford or use the facilities of a service offered up under a contract?

I had Virgin internet in my last place, I really reluctantly signed up to a 12 month contract which was £20 a month. I checked my balance not long ago and they were suddenly charging me £35 a month. I don't trust these twats with their contracts and billing. I moved recently and Virgin said they couldn't transfer my internet (at a £20 charge) so I would have to pay £240 to cancel. Naturally I told them where to stick their cancellation charge.

 

When I was with Three on an IPhone 4, I had unlimited data, it was fantastic, and I just used the phone as a modem and connected my PC to it. £35 a month - for my punishment, I am now with Vodafone with my Iphone 6 which I bought last year in May - on a 24 month contract. It's convenient more than anything, you can phone etc without the worry of running out of credit, but I didn't take into account that a 2GB data limit would be gobbled up within a couple of weeks, unless you just want to use your phone to read 1mb text files for entertainment. I'd love to go on YouTube or use sat nav, but your data limit will be up within a week. You could watch 20 10 minute videos on YouTube on 2GB, and I've got another year of this. What a mess.

 

I've had an EE dongle which is pretty crap, but after the bollocks of contracts, I've gone back to this now again, and I'll top it up £28 a month and have 16GB without a contract, which I can then attach my phone to. Even the internet activation doesn't work and I really don't know how much money I've paid as I currently have a 512MB plan it says, and I've paid £28. So something's gone wrong, and the EE shop add on page doesn't work (it says 'come back later' but it was saying that three days ago).

I should've just gone into the EE shop, paid £28 and said 'do this for me please'.

 

This all boils down to sending work off to an employer who is getting tired of the 'my internet isn't working', as I can't send anything to them - I'm on the verge of tearing my hair out over this - I fucking hate technology, it's great when it works, but when there's so much handshaking and protocol, especially over the net, it rarely does.

 

I could put all my work on my laptop and take it to my mum's and use her internet, but my laptop has just bit the dust. In theory I could transfer it to either my IPhone or IPad, which is literally a computer, but Apple don't allow that.

 

As you can see from the attached screenshot, I have used nearly 50MB in the past few minutes - 10% of my monthly allowance.

 

Fuck it all in the arse!

 

 

That sounds pretty shit to be honest, I have just got the three payg bundle for £20 and you get 300 mins 3000 texts and a massive 12GB data allowance, I thought that was a great deal, I only bought it to use on hols in Spain as there are no roaming charges but will probably carry it on when I come home.

 

Posted

American cars, I just don't get them (as much as I lust after a V8-powered muscle car)... I've driven 1000 miles in the last week in something called a Chevrolet Traverse. (I know this, because it's printed on the rental papers - the car is otherwise about as anonymous as they come).

 

This 7-seat mommy-wagon features a 3.6 litre (sorry, liter) engine and returns 19 (American) mpgs. These facts might lead you to think it's some sort of performance machine - yet the shit heap feels so woefully underpowered that you literally need to book ahead to overtake. There appears to be no connection between the accelerator (sorry, gas pedal) and the engine, and if you put the box in manual selectamatictronic mode, it pays no attention whatsoever to the gear you pick.

 

Only two redeeming features:

(1) it's exceptionally quiet and smooth, the quietest car I've ever had - both engine and road noise.

(2) At night, the solid-looking silver trim strips on the tupperware dashboard light up with little green neon strips inside them (this of course serves no purpose and is very tacky, but I like it)

Posted

Lazy and strangled. 19mpg is a new American record don't you know?

 

Sent from my GT-I9505 using Tapatalk

 

 

Posted

Seen it all now,woman driver bumped up kerb in a small hatchback outside my house narrowly missing my car.

Phone held up to her ear rabbiting away.On her lap was a large staff or similar buckled in by her seatbelt.

Posted

Feel like shit, flu, then cold now feel sick. Cant wait to get into bed.

Posted

I've not seen this grump on here before, but iPad/iPhone/Apple horrible oppressive autocorrect function while typing.

It corrects words into two words that don't even make sense in combination. I unintentionally called my male work manager a 'bitch' a few months ago. I sent a single word 'curry' to my Indian mate, completely out of the blue, unrelated to the conversation.

 

Selecting and copying/pasting is a true test of patience and mental endurance.

Posted

The only redeeming feature on an iPhone for me is the fatally flawed autocorrect. ......it opens up a whole new avenue of discussion amongst my mates......try put Lardarse into a message and see what it throws up (or used to,depending on how hard feet have been stamped ect ect)

 

Sent from my SM-G920F using Tapatalk

 

 

Posted

Feel like shit, flu, then cold now feel sick. Cant wait to get into bed.

Been to docs got some tablets. Feck me its like trying to swallow a whole spaceship!

Posted

Part 1

Mike announces that this week we're looking for one of his 'all time favourite motors' - the xxx xxx
Finding one at this budget is going to be tough so Mike takes to the classifieds and an un-named internet auction site (occasionally an old flame from the motor trade)
Mike is on his way to see a xxx he's found thats in budget - at this money it could be a gamble
Mike prods around a rough looking example and quickly identifies a number of issues using his knowledge gained in the motor trade
On the test drive he determines that none of them will be a problem for his mechanic, Ed, so he decides to go in with his "size 9's" and "bid him"
Mike offers 40% below the asking price whilst thrusting his hand into the poor unsuspecting sellers midriff chanting "hold out yer'and" in a strangely hypnotic ritual
The seller quickly relents, Mike turns to the camera "I've just bought myself a xxx xxx, FANTASTIC!"

 

Back at the workshop Ed emerges and gives the car a cautiously pesimistic look over
Mike, in his cheeky chirpy mockney  manner, reassures him what a great deal it was and how with a bit of Ed's magic, we could turn a tidy profit on this one
In the workshop, Ed gives a detailed run down of the cars faults, gradually more upbeat, he concludes that its going to be a lot of hard work, but it will be worth it in the end

 

Part 2

At the workshop Ed is carrying out a series of major mechanical repairs far beyond the scope of any home mechanic who doesn't have a fully kitted out garage with ramp
Mike drops by with a set of refurbed alloys and asks what Ed has been up to (ha ha)
Ed notes that all the jobs so far have been underneath, its a lot of hard work but will really make the difference - Mike leaves
Paintwork by Dick, refurbished parts from an internet auction site applied as necessary

 

 

Part 3

Mike is off to meet xxx who has one of the cleanest examples of a xxx xxx in the country
xxx gives a breif monotonous history of his ownership and the little touches he's done to the car, Mike doesn't give a shit, he just wants a go
Mike asks for a drive, xxx drops the keys in his hand - montage of Mike driving around an airfield like a ham fisted ape going "WOOHOO" and "FANTASTIC" a lot
Mike concludes that this is a real cracka of an example and hopefully with a bit of magic from Ed, theirs won't be a million miles away

 

Mike returns to the workshop where Ed is just finishing up
Mike and Ed say "wow" "fantastic" and "well done fella" Ed says that its been a lot of hard work but the results really speak for themselves
Mike gives a run down of the spend, which is curiously much cheaper than you might think
Ed hands Mike the keys and they're off for a test drive

 

Part 4

Mike blasting down a mountain road or country lane with Ed awkwardly crammed into the passenger seat like Donkey Kong in Super Mario Kart
Using his knowledge from the car industry Mike identifies that top models are fetching xxx, but he's not going to be greedy and pitches his at several thousand below this
Ed agrees with the valuation, noting that its been a lot of hard work, but it now really is one of the best and worth every penny

Mike is showing around xxx who really likes the car and immediately points out all the jobs Ed has done
The buyer 'bids him' Mike counter bids saying if its any less he will keep it, its tense, but Mike thinks he knows where this is going to end up and they settle on a figure in the middle resulting in a negligible profit\minor loss
Mike turns to the camera while still grasping the sellers hand "You've just bought yourself a xxx xxx Well Done Fella!"

 

Mike summarises that (contrary to the premise of the entire show) sometimes its not all about making a profit, its about keeping another classic on the road - Tala

 

You have now seen every episode of Wheeler Dealers ever - That said, I do actually quite like it..

Posted

Is that with a dongle? Going to go into the actual EE shop today.

Did that today.apparently my 'account' is suspended and in £56 debt from a previous pay as you go account that was apparently a 'rolling contract'. So my pay as you go phone was actually a contract. Who'd have known!! CUNTS

 

I was given a number for helpline to phone. Which doesn't work.

Posted

American cars, I just don't get them (as much as I lust after a V8-powered muscle car)... I've driven 1000 miles in the last week in something called a Chevrolet Traverse. (I know this, because it's printed on the rental papers - the car is otherwise about as anonymous as they come).

This 7-seat mommy-wagon features a 3.6 litre (sorry, liter) engine and returns 19 (American) mpgs. These facts might lead you to think it's some sort of performance machine - yet the shit heap feels so woefully underpowered that you literally need to book ahead to overtake. There appears to be no connection between the accelerator (sorry, gas pedal) and the engine, and if you put the box in manual selectamatictronic mode, it pays no attention whatsoever to the gear you pick.

Only two redeeming features:

(1) it's exceptionally quiet and smooth, the quietest car I've ever had - both engine and road noise.

(2) At night, the solid-looking silver trim strips on the tupperware dashboard light up with little green neon strips inside them (this of course serves no purpose and is very tacky, but I like it)

That 19 mpg would be 23 mpg here so not bad for a 3.6 liter
Guest Hooli
Posted

Seen it all now,woman driver bumped up kerb in a small hatchback outside my house narrowly missing my car.

Phone held up to her ear rabbiting away.On her lap was a large staff or similar buckled in by her seatbelt.

 

I don't understand people driving with dogs on their laps, it's not hard to train them not too & if you cared about the dog surely you'd make sure you could drive safely so the poor dog isn't in an accident?

Posted

I don't understand people driving with dogs on their laps, it's not hard to train them not too & if you cared about the dog surely you'd make sure you could drive safely so the poor dog isn't in an accident?

Exactly. The parents have a proper dealer-fitted dog guard in the back of their C3 Picasso. Dog sits in boot, dribbles where it wants and doesn't get in the way.

 

Admittedly, their Legacy Outback doesn't have a dog guard in it, but the dog is well trained enough to stay in the boot anyway.

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