What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[reb]

2 minutes ago, artdjones said:

As long as it's not trying to corner the World market in Alvis Stalwarts.

My idea has slightly more monetisation routes than Stollies and Roadrunners.

[808 Estate]

[Floatylight]

Just seen a N plate White K10 Micra on a bombsite car dealer in Walsall for £1695 alongside a 2006 Ibiza for £4495..

The world's gone mad!

[MikeR]

The world is mad , the new builds near me have lifebelts because of the water drainage system !!

[Wack]

Went to Bents garden centre yesterday 

Outside they had these tiki huts 

 

table and benches inside 

Some info 

fuck me 

[Metal Guru]

4 hours ago, Wack said:

Went to Bents garden centre yesterday 

Outside they had these tiki huts 

 

table and benches inside 

Some info 

fuck me 

Should ad about -£10k to the value of your property.

[MikeR]

Watch this one , the last  test is explosive ....

 

[iainrcz]

I've found where 3 are spending my contract money.

Harrogate.

Mobile internet is as fast as fuck here compared to home.

[Spottedlaurel]

Had been back on British soil for just 20 minues when I spotted @puddlethumperand his Big + Mazda combo bumbling up the M20!

It was me in the black Lexus who gave you a toot, hope you didn't think you'd done anything wrong....

Amongst other things, on the M25 I saw a late '90s Jaguar XJ on an Essex plate with a driver who looked completely appropriate for it (think tall Phil Mitchell) and a V-reg Citroen XM, then a 2CV on the A12, which was quite neat as I'd been seeing them both in their natural habitat for the last fortnight.

[Rustybullethole]

Tea with a veiw and red dirt in my wheel arches.

 

[cobblers]

Cycling to work this morning. Keep fit! I'm Mr Healthy! etc etc. Had a small apple in my bag to eat for breakfast.

I was starving after riding 18 miles. Randomly took a slightly odd route and went through the middle of Bakewell. A familiar smell - onions cooking from a ropey festival burger van. It's market day!

So I had a greasy burger van double cheeseburger at 7:20AM for my breakfast. With all the trimmings. Fucking magnificent.

[jakebullet]

What shall we call our burger van?

That'll get the punters in for sure...

[somewhatfoolish]

Italian-themed and called The Cunning Linguine?

[Stanky]

Yesterday, on my way home from visiting family I was leaving Cobham services on the M25 and followed three Belgian-registered cars onto the motorway. So what?

They were:

A Mk3 Fiesta Si
A Corsa A (Vauxhall Nova) SRI
A Peugeot 205

All sporting mega Max Power bodykits, huge alloys, aftermarket rear lights, backflashes, lowered suspension, big exhausts - the works. The sort of thing that would have had teenage boys in 1998 spontaneously ejaculating into their trackie bottoms, and quite probably caused a significant section of the 14-25 female population to become pregnant just from being in the vicinity. The sort of cars I remember the cool lads who dropped out of school after their GCSEs getting, then driving round and round the school they'd just left in an effort to woo the more promiscuous girls from years 9 and 10. All funded by their wages from stacking shelves in Tesco.

Incredible to see. Not sure where they were off too? They peeled off at J10 with me, I went south and they all headed north?

Literally cars I've not seen for 20 years. Amazing to see people still looking after stuff like that, it's bad enough looking after standard ones, god knows what it must be like to have to keep on top of rust on a barried one all this time later.

[TheOtherStu]

11 hours ago, Stanky said:

Yesterday, on my way home from visiting family I was leaving Cobham services on the M25 and followed three Belgian-registered cars onto the motorway. So what?

They were:

A Mk3 Fiesta Si
A Corsa A (Vauxhall Nova) SRI
A Peugeot 205

All sporting mega Max Power bodykits, huge alloys, aftermarket rear lights, backflashes, lowered suspension, big exhausts - the works. The sort of thing that would have had teenage boys in 1998 spontaneously ejaculating into their trackie bottoms, and quite probably caused a significant section of the 14-25 female population to become pregnant just from being in the vicinity. The sort of cars I remember the cool lads who dropped out of school after their GCSEs getting, then driving round and round the school they'd just left in an effort to woo the more promiscuous girls from years 9 and 10. All funded by their wages from stacking shelves in Tesco.

Incredible to see. Not sure where they were off too? They peeled off at J10 with me, I went south and they all headed north?

Literally cars I've not seen for 20 years. Amazing to see people still looking after stuff like that, it's bad enough looking after standard ones, god knows what it must be like to have to keep on top of rust on a barried one all this time later.

The Max Power Reunion event was a few weeks back (23rd July).
I wonder if they'd been hanging around the UK for a couple of weeks.

[cobblers]

After about 5 pints on sunday night, I decided I really wanted some decent salsa. This lot has just arrived 😅

[Bren]

In Llandudno yesterday. Heard the sound of something electric approaching round the corner.

Much disappoint when it turned out be a xsara picasso with a noisy alternator.

[richardmorris]

[Wack]

On 8/7/2023 at 3:00 PM, jakebullet said:

What shall we call our burger van?

That'll get the punters in for sure...

There's was one at the end of the M67 called Big baps , she seemed quite popular with the truckers so I'm guessing it wasn't just the burger buns that were big.

[gm]

an unusual choice of track car seen at tonight’s teeside session

but seemed to be going well and sounded good too.

i looked up the reg to see what was under the bonnet

didn’t know such a thing existed ? 

he still had a flower in the vase on the dash 🌺 

[horriblemercedes]

7 minutes ago, gm said:

an unusual choice of track car seen at tonight’s teeside session

but seemed to be going well and sounded good too.

i looked up the reg to see what was under the bonnet

didn’t know such a thing existed ? 

he still had a flower in the vase on the dash 🌺 

V5 they're called, I think? A wonky five cylinder 

[Rustybullethole]

53 minutes ago, horriblemercedes said:

V5 they're called, I think? A wonky five cylinder 

Been passenger. They go well. 

Not as well as this;

Bought by my late grandparents. Five grandchildren and eight great grandchildren later its still a weapon.

Race ya

 

[Wgl2019]

Stolen from Twitter......... 

[andy18s]

I really should try to save some of the amazing auto translations I encounter here 

Favourite so far was a Subaru for sale,with "no banging nieces in the rear"

[hairnet]

so ate me dinner

went down stairs to get a brew

came back upstairs with some leerdammer

WTF

getting old sucks

 

[hairnet]

also ffs that post was 45 mins ago im only going down now for a cuppa

'sake

 

[Andyrew]

Monopoly? Jenga? Pffft.

Get one of these and think of all the Retro fun  all the relatives can have this christmas. 

[Bren]

10 hours ago, Wgl2019 said:

Stolen from Twitter......... 

My mother had a lighter from the pound shop. It was adorned with an image of a golden retriever.

It said " kitten."

[richardmorris]

The American write David sedaris has some great ones from hotels around the world. The book is called “ when you are engulfed in flames”.

https://www.waterstones.com/book/when-you-are-engulfed-in-flames/david-sedaris/9780349116471

 

 

[Wack]

This is a photo of the crowd 1966 world Cup final 

Mr Anderson  , we're all living in The Matrix