What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[Joey spud]

[3VOM]

The time to be worried in a prostate exam is when you feel both his hands on your shoulders.

[beko1987]

2 hours ago, richardmorris said:

They’ve really lost the plot. There’s a very nice 1980s 6 series outside my work at the moment( highline I don’t know) that looks very smart and understated. I loved watching spencer for hire back when I was a teenager.

Their horrible! And now I've seen one I see them everywhere. They must be throwing the little 5 door hatchback one at people cheap, I'm seeing 20 plates bloody everywhere, all povvo spec in free colours and cloth

[High Jetter]

5 minutes ago, 3VOM said:

The time to be worried in a prostate exam is when you feel both his hands on your shoulders.

How do you know?

[Garythesnail]

7 hours ago, High Jetter said:

How do you know?

He's a doctor.

[New POD]

19 hours ago, Jerzy Woking said:

My former employers had an office in the Triad building in Bootle. I had to attend a meeting there and found it to be a horribly depressing  place. I was told many staff suffered from "Sick Building Syndrome" and the building itself had concrete cancer.

They are moving to the India Building in Liverpool, but that seems to be blighted with asbestos. Out of the frying pan...

Did they turn the triad into flats ? 

[808 Estate]

 

[Jerzy Woking]

8 hours ago, New POD said:

Did they turn the triad into flats ? 

No idea, but their office at Queens Dock close by to the Arena was converted to flats. Only went there for 4 weeks to deliver a training course. It was falling to bits, to the extent that a fai few windows fell out

In the last month they have jvacated their building by the Thames in Tower Hill, London. Sold for conversion to a hotel and apartments that no one working there would ever afford to buy. Beautiful building, great history but totally unsuited as a modern day office, sadly.

[Crackers]

18 hours ago, beko1987 said:

Their horrible! And now I've seen one I see them everywhere. They must be throwing the little 5 door hatchback one at people cheap, I'm seeing 20 plates bloody everywhere, all povvo spec in free colours and cloth

I've warmed to the new 1 series now, although the 2, 4, 7 and X models still haven't convinced me.

I don't know what they're like in pov-spec, but a new 1 series with a good amount of toys is a properly nice car. BMW have got something seriously right with the interiors on them and they ride infinitely better than the old RWD ones. Many people are saying they're a better drive too, although I haven't actually driven one yet.

[Remspoor]

23 hours ago, Garythesnail said:

FFS don't eat it - just rub Lada Cream in to the rust.

FTFY

[myglaren]

[myglaren]

 

[MarvinsMom]

On 5/11/2021 at 10:46 PM, beko1987 said:

Their horrible! And now I've seen one I see them everywhere. They must be throwing the little 5 door hatchback one at people cheap, I'm seeing 20 plates bloody everywhere, all povvo spec in free colours and cloth

cos in the olden dayz BMW sold cars to folks for proper money.

now, well they rent them too all and sundry, so much down and so much a month for so many months.

so people go there instead of to Fords or Vauxhall, cos apparently that badge on the front is a "better" one than a Griffin or Blue Oval.

apparently......

 

[outlaw118]

On 5/11/2021 at 10:44 PM, 3VOM said:

The time to be worried in a prostate exam is when you feel both his hands on your shoulders

Here's a tale told to me by my mate Dr Pants (a proper doctor)

Whilst doing his placement at A London Hospital with some other med students, one of his fellow doctors-to-be had cause to do a rectal exam on some chap who had suspected inflammation of the prostate. The patient assumed the position, and the senior doctor started the exam. Student doctor enters the cubicle and senior doc gestures that the student should have a go. He does so, and whilst having a root around he puts his left hand on the blokes shoulder. Knowing the senior doctor had his hand on his right shoulder the patient panics, clenches and wriggles, breaking the student doctors finger.........

[robinmasters]

Tim Hunkin, explaining how computer-aided design was making cars all look the same. 

"This body shell could be from anything, even professional mechanics couldn't tell what makes and model it was at first sight"

I've got 20p here that's says you're wrong, Tim. 

 

[Remspoor]

On 5/11/2021 at 11:44 PM, 3VOM said:

The time to be worried in a prostate exam is when you feel both his hands on your shoulders.

What about if he is a she?  Would her name be Peg?

[Remspoor]

9 hours ago, myglaren said:

Was that on the BBC?  😉

[Aston Martin]

People of Derby, what's the deal with that little road off Queensway near the McDonald's?

 

2 volvos.... 2 alfas.... 2 volvos..... 2 bmws.......  1 Volvo

 

It's very odd, or maybe a weird ebay seller. But they take up the entire road.

[Agila]

27 minutes ago, Aston Martin said:

People of Derby, what's the deal with that little road off Queensway near the McDonald's?

 

2 volvos.... 2 alfas.... 2 volvos..... 2 bmws.......  1 Volvo

 

It's very odd, or maybe a weird ebay seller. But they take up the entire road.

Or just a legend. If it's the same gaff I think there is a black a3(upgraded intercooler), seen a merc e class coupe thing, also a slammed lexus.

Don't know what's going off with the houses either, half look like a compulsory purchase order thing, half still lived in.

I assume they will widen the bottleneck and create a left hand turn slip road. That roundabout is always jammed up.

[Aston Martin]

25 minutes ago, Agila said:

Or just a legend. If it's the same gaff I think there is a black a3(upgraded intercooler), seen a merc e class coupe thing, also a slammed lexus.

Don't know what's going off with the houses either, half look like a compulsory purchase order thing, half still lived in.

I assume they will widen the bottleneck and create a left hand turn slip road. That roundabout is always jammed up.

 

Yes, some of the houses look boarded up. But you'll just see similar makes paired together. It's very odd.

[Popsicle]

1 hour ago, Aston Martin said:

People of Derby, what's the deal with that little road off Queensway near the McDonald's?

 

2 volvos.... 2 alfas.... 2 volvos..... 2 bmws.......  1 Volvo

 

It's very odd, or maybe a weird ebay seller. But they take up the entire road.

Not sure about the cars but they've been planning a underpass for years: https://highwaysengland.co.uk/our-work/east-midlands/a38-derby-junctions/

[catsinthewelder]

On 5/11/2021 at 11:06 AM, Wilko220 said:

Oops…

https://www.thecomet.net/news/grenade-found-in-hitchin-7962144?fbclid=IwAR2MNfdaAIYuDGVMBiJyYIeWGVv0KZWZGvc26HCbgGMUjRs6JkxHNVugWVQ

 

Ironic finding a grenade at a Citroen specialist, the bomb squad are usually out when people have dug a Citroen suspension sphere up in their garden.

[Tadhg Tiogar]

1 hour ago, catsinthewelder said:

Ironic finding a grenade at a Citroen specialist, the bomb squad are usually out when people have dug a Citroen suspension sphere up in their garden.

To be fair, the pressure inside a Cit sphere is probably greater than that inside a wartime grenade.

[PhilA]

Went get a chocolate malt. Was looking at the archaeology outside the window.

Some old tar from about 1970 (according to the owner when they redid the roof) has captured old bottle caps and ring pulls.

Time capsule!

[Ghosty]

Spotted a turbodiesel ZX at Birchanger Services. 

Something tells me it isn't running on diesel...

[auntiemaryscanary]

We've moved house, only half a mile away, but new chod spotting potential aplenty. I'm easily pleased

A high rise roof rack and a kwality sun roof repair.

[Floatylight]

Exhaust problems M9?

[jakebullet]

Someone doesn't like pineapples. Recovery truck's reg is VW 10SER

[Agila]

18 minutes ago, jakebullet said:

Someone doesn't like pineapples. Recovery truck's reg is VW 10SER

They probably keep him in business. 

[PhilA]

Little local car show. Took the Pontiac along and parked up in the trees.

 

Not a bad turnout. Some really nice machinery too.

 

Phil