What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[stonedagain]

Ask Alexa to fart, pmsl!

[iainrcz]

The 1980s has been achieved.
We've bought an electric hand mixer.

Now, where's the dream topping..

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[Cheggers]

The house move is finally happening!
21st of December is the date I'm moving, other half will be in sooner than that because they haven't had to work around the same logistics that I have.  Look out, Kent, here I come.

Finally!!...Congratulations Angyl.

[Mally]

I'm in Benidorm for Xmas, have enough euros to last me.

I draw my pension every week, so realised I will have 2 spare wages on my return.

So this morning spent it on a week in Fuengirola in February.

[clayts450]

Love a bargain me. Popped into Aldi for some bog roll, came out with some axle stands as well, reduced to 7.99 at the till, 9.99 on the shelf. 

https://www.aldi.co.uk/2-tonnes-wheel-axles/p/020749297750700

[myglaren]

[busmansholiday]

1 hour ago, Mally said:

I'm in Benidorm for Xmas, have enough euros to last me.

I draw my pension every week, so realised I will have 2 spare wages on my return.

So this morning spent it on a week in Fuengirola in February.

Is that, you're going to Benidorm for Xmas or you're already there?

[hairnet]

On 12/8/2019 at 6:27 PM, PhilA said:

Parents going for a jolly. 

 

Phil

put them in the renault theyll book a flight in that 10 mins  (kidding)

 

[HillmanImp]

Well will you look at that. 

[Wack]

20 hours ago, jamiechod said:

Hopefully this will make me grin, just left a deposit on it collecting Saturday  no logical reason for buying it I have a perfectly good diesel estate with probably more power but I've just always wanted to scratch the itch. Cheapest fn2 type r which has been for sale recently  wcpgw? 

A guy I know had one of those , somebody egged him on so he went after them on a dual carriageway ,caught them just as they went over the brow of a hill only by then the guy was braking hard 

That'll be because of that roundabout then , he didn't stop , straight into it 

When the police arrived they started questioning his son who had to point out the old guy sat on the wall as the driver, Rick was 70 at the time

[Mally]

16 hours ago, busmansholiday said:

Is that, you're going to Benidorm for Xmas or you're already there?

Yes, can be read either way sorry. There on Monday.

[xtriple]

Bought new jeans from eBay, MandS rejects apparently. Had a whinge the other day on here cos they don't fit - too big by miles round the waist and a lot tighter round my manly and masculine (hahahaha) thighs. However, with a belt cinched up tight round the waist they are really bloody comfortable! Stretch fit apparently and so soft on my delicate skin but yes, they look silly and a bit 'hipster' but as anyone who knows me will attest, I ain't no fashion victim!

For a penny under a tenner I don't think I have a right to complain, do I?

[High Jetter]

Asda jeans do me for working in. Used to be £5 a pair, last time I bought had gone up to £7. Comfy and strong enough for what I need, again not fussed about fashon.

[busmansholiday]

3 hours ago, Mally said:

Yes, can be read either way sorry. There on Monday.

Bugger, back home from Benidorm shortly so you'll be pleased to know you'll miss me!

[Mally]

Ah pity I miss you.

Been going every Xmas for years.

Missed last year as my wife died, but back in the routine now.

Know someone in same hotel, so not on my own for gala meal.

[HillmanImp]

Now I've got an estate I've decided I can start going mountain biking again as its so simple to just lob the bike in the boot. No fucking about with bike racks, taking wheels off and all that Jazz. 

Fuckin' winner. 

Don't even have to fold the whole seat, just half. Even easier as Imp Jrs seats there. 

Just need some sheets down to keep the boot clean. 

However I've not ridden for a bit so this was me taking the bike to the shop for a 'service' which will probably cost more than I paid for it in the first place. 

But if it gets me out again then bob on mofo. 

[iainrcz]

We're away in Manchester for a few nights.

Reasonably pleasant trip over, despite the rain. Not to mention the wanker who was driving like a massive cock behind me so I pulled over to let him pass.

 

Had my belly filled and a few beers, we've decided it's bed time already.

 

Bonus points to the Mrs for packing some hot chocolate.

 

God we're fucking ravers.

 

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[cobblers]

I like burgers, I'm not a snob about them, I'll eat any burger, but I do appreciate a good one, and I've found the best burgers always come from the last place you'd expect. Five guys, In'n'out  and all those "hipster" burger places are great, but the really amazing ones take you by surprise.

On sunday I drove cross country to Warrington to pick our lass up after she'd had an operation, where she couldn't eat any solids for 6 weeks after. On the way back home I was fucking starving so I popped into a Spar on the way and they had some burgers in a hot cabinet, not thinking I grabbed one and wandered back to the car where she was sat and started eating it infront of her.

This burger was the best burger I have ever had. Lovely thick patty, cooked and seasoned perfectly. Soft bun, grated quality cheese on it. My mouth is watering just thinking about it. Three bites in I was just about to go off on how great this burger was, but I looked over at my mrs who can only eat jelly for two months and realised I'd dropped a bit of a bollock and just had to eat the rest of it very quickly and keep quiet about how bloody amazing this burger was.

I'm trying to find an excuse to drive the 40 mile round trip for another. 

(It's Spar in Calver, S32 3XH)

[myglaren]

[Tayne]

1 hour ago, cobblers said:

I like burgers, I'm not a snob about them, I'll eat any burger, but I do appreciate a good one, and I've found the best burgers always come from the last place you'd expect. Five guys, In'n'out  and all those "hipster" burger places are great, but the really amazing ones take you by surprise.

On sunday I drove cross country to Warrington to pick our lass up after she'd had an operation, where she couldn't eat any solids for 6 weeks after. On the way back home I was fucking starving so I popped into a Spar on the way and they had some burgers in a hot cabinet, not thinking I grabbed one and wandered back to the car where she was sat and started eating it infront of her.

This burger was the best burger I have ever had. Lovely thick patty, cooked and seasoned perfectly. Soft bun, grated quality cheese on it. My mouth is watering just thinking about it. Three bites in I was just about to go off on how great this burger was, but I looked over at my mrs who can only eat jelly for two months and realised I'd dropped a bit of a bollock and just had to eat the rest of it very quickly and keep quiet about how bloody amazing this burger was.

I'm trying to find an excuse to drive the 40 mile round trip for another. 

(It's Spar in Calver, S32 3XH)

 

Find somewhere nearby that serves Beyond Meat burgers.

 

Seriously. 

[paulplom]

This car is like that everyday. The guy owns the convenience shop. Why not just by a car that fit for purpose? Completely over loaded. It's only 3 years old, I kind of feel sorry for it.

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[somewhatfoolish]

Dob him in to the dibble for overloading and wait until the heat death of the universe(approx 10 with another 99 zeros after it years) before they spring into action.

[myglaren]

 

 

 

[paulplom]

Are those carrier bags of petrol? What a great idea. Why waste your money on those green plastic things.

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[wuvvum]

When I was working in a BP petrol station years ago, we did actually have one bloke who'd run out of petrol up the road come in and try to fill a Tesco carrier bag with petrol.  Fortunately the woman on the till at the time was on the ball, spotted him on the camera and refused to start the pump.

[face]

That video also represents quite possibly the most dreadful musical composition the world has ever heard.

[myglaren]

3 minutes ago, face said:

That video also represents quite possibly the most dreadful musical composition the world has ever heard.

Crap isn't it?

I listen to it with the sound off.  Better that way.

[face]

Who the hell buys this shit?

I cannot for the life of me understand the attraction.

[Tadhg Tiogar]

3 hours ago, paulplom said:

Are those carrier bags of petrol? What a great idea....
 

....and she double-bagged it!

[HMC]