What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[MorrisItalSLX]

I’ve also got a stack of Maestros cluttering up the place

[Wack]

Saw this sign on a morrisons forecourt , went in ,picked up a sandwich and a bag of crisps 

Disappointed any drink doesn't include the bottle of single malt behind the counter 

[Andyrew]

Spent a few days traveling Wales south to north via the lanes with some friends. We got lucky with the weather. I love the place even more now. What a country. 

 

 

[hairnet]

bought a ticket for this is tomorrow in newcastle on sunday

it said 1pm on the ticket so thought maybe the artiste would be on not long after that or maybe a little later in the afternoon

up till tuesday didnt take much notice but thinking - ive not seen the ticket........i checked their email and it says it will be posted.......if you dont get one the week of the gig contact us etc...........

mailed them and they were completely brilliant and said theyd leave one at the ticket office (which i didnt know thered be when i booked it else id have done that as its an outdoor gig)

larf one - only found out the running order on tuesday and the two artists ones on at 1830

the others on at 2015

i thought cos of early start id be gone from the place early evening id have plenty of time to drive an hour south to stop at zzzzzzz for the night

nope stereophonics get off stage 2230 on sunday

cos im old i decided fk it and found somewhere 10 mins walk from the place

so instead of on the go all day walking roond tha park like  its out from ponteland go for lunch fart about then ride down to jesmond book into hotel and just drink tea and fart about till the evening 

but the daft thing larf two - ill be heading for at least kelso on saturday

youd think id be no problem for 40 miles on a sunday evening

i just decided i couldnt be arsed  i def getting old

 

[stephen01]

My car is mainly one colour, I’m sure my neighbours love me especially given the fact I did this on the road.

Not to bad considering it was about an hours work..

 

[clayts450]

Forgotten I'd taken this photo - the old and the 'new' : the 420 and a random HHR in a car park in Bulwell - the 45 actually parked next to mine whilst I was shopping for cat food or some other shizzle

[The Moog]

13 hours ago, hairnet said:

bought a ticket for this is tomorrow in newcastle on sunday....

 

Only needed to read this twice to understand it ... blimey

[tommytwo]

Was unexpectedly sent to hospital on Friday, and kept in for 2 nights. Released on Sunday and was liable for 2 days car parking. Explained my situation to the Security on the hospital desk, as I had no money to pay for the parking. He told me to just drive up to the exit, press the call button on the machine and explain my situation So I did. The conversation went like this:

" I had to park in the car park for 2 days as, they kept me in for 2 nights and would not let me go home. I have no money to pay for the car parking charges" He asked me who had told me to call him and I said I was told to do this by a guy on the security deslk. He says:" Let me get this straight. You want me to let you out for free"?  I said "Yes"

He says. " All right then", the barrier goes up and off I go.  I was surprised.

I guess those who do not ask, do not get!

[beko1987]

When Eva was little she had about a week at Stoke Mandeville (I had the xm at the time). After the first day I noticed the card machine was out of order... Quickly worked out that if I stood around looking worried because I only had my card on me, or a pocket of change that wasn't enough to pay, they just lifted the barrier. Different parking nod every night too... Quick trip the the security desk, look flustered and tired at 2.30am and voila! 

Week of free parking! Was a bit annoying one night though as the car park was full, and to park on the road the payment is different. I just waited for someone to leave

[wuvvum]

It's Strumpshaw Steam Rally this weekend.  A traction engine has just driven past the office.

[busmansholiday]

[anonymous user]

10 minutes ago, busmansholiday said:

And let that be a lesson not to park near a railway sidings 

[Wack]

[mrbenn]

4 hours ago, tommytwo said:

Was unexpectedly sent to hospital on Friday, and kept in for 2 nights. Released on Sunday and was liable for 2 days car parking. Explained my situation to the Security on the hospital desk, as I had no money to pay for the parking. He told me to just drive up to the exit, press the call button on the machine and explain my situation So I did. The conversation went like this:

" I had to park in the car park for 2 days as, they kept me in for 2 nights and would not let me go home. I have no money to pay for the car parking charges" He asked me who had told me to call him and I said I was told to do this by a guy on the security deslk. He says:" Let me get this straight. You want me to let you out for free"?  I said "Yes"

He says. " All right then", the barrier goes up and off I go.  I was surprised.

I guess those who do not ask, do not get!

Liked for the parking story rather than the hospital visit, obvs.

Hope you're alright!

[hairnet]

8 hours ago, snagglepuss said:

Only needed to read this twice to understand it ... blimey

glasses for you

ps 

[vulgalour]

In town today and typically, I didn't have a camera on me.  Managed to park next to the ancient Vauxhall Victor I've papped a few times over the years and in the car park elsewhere was the two-tone Beetle I've not seen for a while, a very clean Mk5 or Mk6 Escort and, of all things, a bright orange and black Panther Kallisto.  You'll have to take my word for it, naturally, I doubt I'll see that assortment in the same place again.

[Tamworthbay]

Well it’s been a hell of a fucking year so far. Massive shout out to all our wonderful NHS staff and particularly the neonatal heart team at Glenfield's in Leicester. After a six hour heart op my niece’s 6 day old daughter is doing well. Massive relief all round.

[hairnet]

ROOOOOAÀAAAAADDDDDDDTTTTTTTRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIPPPPPPPPPPP

 

But

 

Got to where staying got stuff out of bike went watched TV and made a brew

 

Went downstairs to lock bike - chain yes lock yes 

 

Fuck where s the keys

 

Back in Manchester :j

I wear a different jacket during the week and carry all.keys as the big bunch has house keys on it too

Different jacket for trips DOH

Had to go to the handy Asda ( why I pick places.like this)

 

Padlock bough ( phew)

Only done it three times now last time I was in coenwall

 

[Bucketeer]

At least you didn't lock it before discovering you didn't have the keys with you. Only a complete absolute moron would do that.

Yes, I have.

[purplebargeken]

House is worth around 380 to 400K. 

Main stumbling block to moving somewhere nice, isolated, with a bit of space and not London would be Mrs PBK. Would likely struggle with something like a small holding but anywhere* would be better than fucking Edmonton.

[Tadhg Tiogar]

15 minutes ago, purplebargeken said:

....anywhere* would be better than fucking Edmonton.

Except maybe Dalston.

[hairnet]

23 minutes ago, Bucketeer said:

At least you didn't lock it before discovering you didn't have the keys with you. Only a complete absolute moron would do that.

Yes, I have.

Can't do that lock is type can't open or close without the key

[catsinthewelder]

I think you should stick to that type ?

[LightBulbFun]

26 minutes ago, purplebargeken said:

House is worth around 380 to 400K. 

Main stumbling block to moving somewhere nice, isolated, with a bit of space and not London would be Mrs PBK. Would likely struggle with something like a small holding but anywhere* would be better than fucking Edmonton.

so what your saying is you should copy DW and move to wales? and get an invacar 

[Tamworthbay]

3 hours ago, purplebargeken said:

House is worth around 380 to 400K. 

Main stumbling block to moving somewhere nice, isolated, with a bit of space and not London would be Mrs PBK. Would likely struggle with something like a small holding but anywhere* would be better than fucking Edmonton.

You could buy Lancashire for that mate, get out of that dreary place to somewhere decent.

[3VOM]

10 hours ago, hairnet said:

Can't do that lock is type can't open or close without the key

Can't open without a key you say?

 

[cobblers]

My van was in at a local bodyshop for the tailgate painting and a few touchups before I sell it. As usual it took them three times longer than they said and it's not a particularly fantastic job.

I picked it up yesterday lunchtime, drove straight down the M1 back to work. Home from work after, and there and back today.

A bit after I got home I went upstairs to the bog and looked out of the window - there's a flipping roll of masking tape left on the roof!

It's been there for two days and about 80 miles!

[Sealtainn]

Getting pissed with the Bulgarian neighbours on home brewed Rakia, can’t feel me legs so getting home should be a riot
Thank God for autocorrect as me spelling is up shit creek


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[dollywobbler]

My old Westminster has been on telly!

I'm thrilled about that. It appeared on Ebay a few years back, looking quite rotten and a bit sad. Still shows as 2660cc because some idiot (perhaps when it was plate raped) put the previous four-cylinder A90 engine size.

[hairnet]

21 hours ago, catsinthewelder said:

I think you should stick to that type ?

I have the lock

NOT THE KEY

hairy fecker ?