What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[Station]

Microsoft develops a tweeting AI program which turns into a racist Jew hating, holicaust denying spleen venting machine in 24 hours:

 

http://www.marketwatch.com/story/microsoft-pulls-plug-after-chat-robot-slings-slurs-rips-obama-and-denies-holocaust-2016-03-24

 

[beko1987]

About to go on a ride in a trailer attached to a j reg tractor!

[mouseflakes]

Microsoft develops a tweeting AI program which turns into a racist Jew hating, holicaust denying spleen venting machine in 24 hours:

 

I don't understand the point of Twitter, but that seems a daft idea from the outset - bound to be exploited.

[Pillock]

Yeah, it appears that someone at Microsoft is way more naive than anyone thought, even more so when they thought the entire world would welcome a touch-first interface in Win8.

 

It's been taken offline for a bit of "tweaking". Essentially it seems if enough people tweeted the same sort of things, it would take it on as something it needed to repeat. 4chan got involved and it all went a bit pear shaped within hours.

[xtriple]

I got asked out today.

 

Twice.

 

By two different women!

 

Unfortunately, I had to decline as one wanted me to fund her drinking habit and the other didn't realise I'm a cripple!

[saucedoctor]

ISTR that Microsoft had an issue with (I think) Word for Windows 95. If you typed in, for example "Mexican", and used the thesaurus, it would give alternatives like "Bandit", "robber", "Illegal" etc.

 

Maybe Donald Trump worked at MS in those days, who knows.

[Cavcraft]

Sod all to you young fit people, but for a 17 stone, asthmatic 52 year old cake lover on a 20 year old Italian cycle it was like the TDF three times over...

 

[andrew e]

Christ on a... er bike Billy! Coupled with tonight's piss up, your going to be one sore/hungover/grumpy bastardised Sunday morning!

[dinglem]

Bloody hell, that's some going! I thought I was doing ok doing 20km on the exercise bike last night :-/

[cort16]

What happened here, was their semi clothed women standing in her balcony?

 

[Cavcraft]

No drinking tonight, that's reserved for tomorrow evening. 

[saucedoctor]

Get the Buckfast down yer neck. It's good* for you.

[hairnet]

Sod all to you young fit people, but for a 17 stone, asthmatic 52 year old cake lover on a 20 year old Italian cycle it was like the TDF three times over...

 

image.jpg

them numbers dont make sense

[phil_lihp]

Just back from a couple of days in Amsterdam where they don't really do cars for the most part, just millions of bicycles, but that said, dotted around the streets there were a few Volvo 240s, an Amazon and a Peugeot 504 parked up which all looked slightly scruffy but obviously in regular use.  No photos I'm afraid but the top sighting had to be a woman in a brightly coloured knitted jumper taking her kids home from school in a scruffy and slightly battered (but still lovely) Citroen DS, she wasn't hanging around either in among the manic traffic of rush hour.  I did spot a couple of DS's knocking about on side streets around the city including a tatty Safari but it's great to see these old cars out on the road and being used every day.

[FakeConcern]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0k_03C768hU&feature=youtu.be&t=25s

 

 

[plasticvandan]

Tax rebate.

[cobblers]

This morning I did the usual "someones coming to buy my car tomorrow, lets dig the V5 out. I know it's here somewhere" search descending into panic. 

Absolutely turned my workshop upside down, it's nowhere. I'm getting belligerent and pissed off at myself for being so badly organised and stuff. I'm on the DVLA website printing forms off and just about to ring people to tell them "I'm a moron and can't find the v5"

Anyway our lass hears me cursing and carrying so she comes and asks me what's up. I describe a V5 to her.

 

20 seconds later she comes walking in with said V5 and a bacon sandwich. It absolutely doesn't get any better than that.

[cort16]

so it was in the fridge?

[Noel Tidybeard]

I'd love to live on a boat. Fishing tackle and no bugger to bother me

yes  fewer walls to run over

 

 

i'll get me coat

[fordperv]

Just stumbled across this, there's some fantastic aerial pictures from the mid to late 1920s

 

http://www.britainfromabove.org.uk/

[Guest Hooli]

Technically*, for an RHD market, they are correct. Everybody else is wrong...

 

Indicators on the right is so much better for any country that drives on the left. Damn those bloody yanks, I blame them for this along with bikes having the gears on the wrong side & upside down.

[robinmasters]

Free premier inn breakfast smashed. Lady looked at me funny when I asked for thirds...

 

I don't think Premier Inn make any profit from me. Thirds on the breakfast buffet are inevitable, then back to the room for the post-breakfast shit before checking out. 

[Richard]

How do you get a free breakfast, or free anything, out of Premier Inn? The last (and only ever) time I stayed in a Premier Inn even the continental breakfast was something like £1000000.

[omegod]

How do you get a free breakfast, or free anything, out of Premier Inn? The last (and only ever) time I stayed in a Premier Inn even the continental breakfast was something like £1000000.

 

Generally it is accepted form to give someone else's room number 

[purplebargeken]

Picked up Ben from the local station last night. Stopped at some lights and a chav/gangster hot hatch pulled up along side. Drivers window open, young lad, bass making your eyes bleed, has his lean on, one arm draped over the door type thing. Engine revving, you get the idea. I obv knew he was going for it as there was a bus on his side of the road further up.

 

Mrs. PBK's Micra is no slouch, so I thought, why not. Lights change, he goes to hurtle off and stalls it. I pulled slowly away, laughing myself sick, almost to the point of vomiting. Funniest thing of almost evah.

[dollywobbler]

Picked up Ben from the local station last night. Stopped at some lights and a chav/gangster hot hatch pulled up along side. Drivers window open, young lad, bass making your eyes bleed, has his lean on, one arm draped over the door type thing. Engine revving, you get the idea. I obv knew he was going for it as there was a bus on his side of the road further up.

 

Mrs. PBK's Micra is no slouch, so I thought, why not. Lights change, he goes to hurtle off and stalls it. I pulled slowly away, laughing myself sick, almost to the point of vomiting. Funniest thing of almost evah.

 

Reminds me of the time I saw a twattish lad in a Saxo go for a proper burn out style pull away to show how macho he was. Backfired rather when the driveshaft went BANG and dropped into view. NICE 1 M8!

[cort16]

Some great rust pervert SD1 pictures on pistonheads

 

They only left them in the rain for one night etc..

 

 

 

 

 

http://www.pistonheads.com/gassing/topic.asp?h=0&f=140&t=1567400

[mercrocker]

Took a break from work this morning to go and pick up a starter motor from a rural garage I frequent.   There is a long up and down hill on a bit of straight near there and I had the Minor pretty wound up to ensure a constant velocity on the down, then the up, gradients. 

 

I could see a pig-eyed Landy coming t'other way and a moped just starting his descent on my side.   Before I got to the moped the B reg'd soft top 88 incher passed me by and I could then see that the moped was in fact a Raleigh Runabout (also B reg) being furiously pedalled as the gradient started to kick in.  I gave the poor bloke some room and carried on up the hill.

 

I wasn't able to fully enjoy the spectacle (or take pics) but just for a moment or two there the whole road was 1964.  

[fordperv]

That's what dash cams were made for

[Cavcraft]

Just picked a cycle trailer up from a top geezer the other side of town. He had two cars, one was a 14 plate MG3 and a 14 plate MG6. He said both were top of the range and the 6 was a dealer registered brand spanker that should have been £21,000 but he got it for just under £13,000. he reckoned his was one of the last of the petrols and MG just couldn't shift them. His plans are to run both into the ground, keeping them as long as he can. One was to replace the 190,000 mile Honda Jazz he had before it.