The grumpy thread

[SiC]

Especially DVLA may be helpful considering its rarity and as a vehicle of historical interest. It's not like you're bringing back a Ford Focus back.

[cobblers]

Yeah I have seen things caved from a COD with a few letters and phone calls. DVLA do seem to have somewhat whipped themselves into shape lately too, so it's worth a crack anyway, even if only to save it getting baled complete.

[Captain Furious]

My ST220 is fucked again blah blah

So, incredibly, swapping the battery to a known fully charged one has no effect either, so it would seem that at the exact same time I swap a duff battery the starter motor packs in. Can’t seem to get a decent angle on it to give it a good sturdy thwacking but the taps with a wheel brace I have managed to rain down on it have had no effect.

 

Tried shoving it backwards and forwards in gear but in this heat I was sweating like fuck in no time.

 

The really worrying thing is that the starter motor was new in my ownership and them failing is often indicative of an impending DMF failure (also new in my ownership)

 

Fucking bastard Ford shit bollocks tit wank cuntrod

[Guest Hooli]

Check the earth strap. Try a jump lead from the block to the neg side of the batt as a quick test.

[Des]

And when you check the earth on a Ford, you also need to check the bit it's earthed to is earthed, The earth return system is an electrical marvel, but challenged somewhat by Fords whimsical little nuance of large sections of bodyshell transmogrifying into soggy wheatabix.

[Captain Furious]

Thanks, I’ve tried the jump lead trick, no change. It’s almost certainly the starter motor tbh, though why it would suddenly completely fail when it has never missed a turn of the key in the past I don’t know, just to piss me off I suppose.

 

Flippin thing always breaks when it’s either 30 degrees Fahrenheit or 30 degrees Celsius too.

[BorniteIdentity]

If a car has already had a CoD issued - could you register it in another country before importing it into the United Kingdom of England?

[Mr_Bo11ox]

I doubt it, if it has no hope of achieving a basic standard of roadworthiness!

[sierraman]

If worst comes to worst and its only used for bits, I'd imagine it would keep another on the road.

[DodgeRover]

I doubt it, if it has no hope of achieving a basic standard of roadworthiness!

 

Register in Romania then?

[chaseracer]

Wouldn't need to leave the UK...

[MorrisItalSLX]

Didn't Trigger "un-scrap" his Marina? It must be possible.

[Tadhg Tiogar]

Spiders have spun several webs on various parts of the CX since FotU. Must get the battery back in and get down to the jet wash.

[Lord Sterling]

Yes that's exactly where the water appears from, I'll have a look later when the sun goes down a little. Thanks .

Let us know how it goes, they are a bit difficult to pin point but the expansion tanks are a known weak point in the E46s. Also, apologies for the poor spelling in my last post. Fat fingers and touch-screen tablets don't mix well

[angle]

Firstly, road resurfacing. Now, I’ve worked in highways, I know you’ll have a programme manager breathing down your neck but THIS IS NOT THE WEATHER FOR IT YOU IDIOTS. I’m not even talking about the M5 being closed because it was the consistency of Bovril – they did my road using the patented ‘tarmac and vaguely spray some loose chippings around’ technique and a week on it still covers your shoes every time you go outside. Which, with a new carpet, is great. It also now looks worse than it did before they started because anyone driving vaguely like a cock is gouging holes in it – a man in a Civic did an emergency stop to avoid a rat last night, and his skidmarks are now preserved for posterity.

 

They're back for another go. Except - they were meant to do it on Friday. All the suspension signs went up, most people moved their cars, and... nothing. At some point they came around and changed the signs so parking was suspended yesterday instead. Again, road more or less cleared, and... nothing. So everyone moved their cars back again.

 

So, at half eight this morning, a man came round with some stickers and changed '23' to '24'on all the signs. They've been around knocking on doors, but most people have left for work, there was at least 20 cars parked up when I left. So now they've started towing everyone. I think there's going to be some annoyed phone calls to the council tonight...

[Talbot]

Not giving appropriate notice and then towing any and all cars out of the way is just bloody rude.

 

I suspect there will be more than just annoyed phone calls. If someone tows a legally parked and otherwise legal car, they are denying the use of that vehicle, which I believe is an offence.

[Tadhg Tiogar]

Not giving appropriate notice and then towing any and all cars out of the way is just bloody rude.

 

I suspect there will be more than just annoyed phone calls. If someone tows a legally parked and otherwise legal car, they are denying the use of that vehicle, which I believe is an offence.

 

...followed by claims for compo?

[Hertz]

Ebay. Oh my fucking god, I despair. I've had so far 16 pretty faultless years on there but this year every other sale or thing I buy I seem to be involved with either a crook or a premier league numpty. 

 

I bought a PAS pump recently, supposedly a manufacturer refurb. Just looked like it had a blow over with a matt black rattle can when it arrived. Still fitted it though and it works if you hit it with a hammer. Not ideal so asked if he could send me another to save time and costs and do another direct swap Can't do that, send me the faulty one back and I will test and send you another if faulty. He's had it back a week and now radio silence. Twat.

 

Had several sales with no money as well so had to cancel the sale then go through the rigmarole of putting it back on and getting fees back.

 

I had one dick who did the above then 2 months later decides he now wants it and says I was impatient so it's my fault. Jesus what planet are these people on?

 

So yes I now appreciate what many of you have been through with ebay. 

[Zelandeth]

You...Yes, you in the Audi A8L.  KY17ZKW.  Reality check time...

 

The fact that you want to be doing 90+mph again by the time I've got into second gear in the van is not my problem - if you're that impatient, just stay in the right hand lane and overtake me.  It was empty and nothing stopping you doing that.

 

Do NOT bloody cut in to my left, drive through the hatched area beside the roundabout then cut back in in front of me (forcing me to virtually do an emergency stop), then have to dodge to the left myself to avoid the other numpty in the BMW coming round the roundabout at 50mph who hadn't noticed I'd stopped because he was on his phone.

 

I either need to get about 20 cameras fitted to everything I drive or just stop driving I think.  You couldn't make up the nonsense I seem to be seeing almost daily these days.

[Supernaut]

My visit to the midlands to go to FoTU is what made me order a dashcam.

 

The driving down there is fucking terrible! RantingYoof picked me up from Birmingham airport, and by the time we got to Northampton we had two really bad near misses. FFS!

 

One was caused by a new-shape Merc A class undertaking us. Yoof pulled into the middle lane to overtake a truck, and as he started to pull back into the inside lane this A-class appeared from behind us at warp 9, then cut between the front of the truck and the back of Yoof's car. As he went past us, we already had 2 wheels in the inside lane again! Cue much horn blaring and swerving as the A-class just continued to fuck right off down the road without caring.

[Captain Furious]

Sunday afternoon I started getting verification text messages for an online payday loan application, I didn't think too much of it, probably some numpty mistyped their number and when they don't get the text through they'll realise and correct it.  The same text came through about 15 times...then stopped.  Monday I had another flurry of them and then they stopped.  Today I had a missed call from a number I didn't recognize, so I google it - its this payday loan companies collection department.  I'm intrigued at this point so I wait for them to call back, which they sure enough do about an hour later.

 

"Hi can I speak to Mr xxx (not my name) please"

"Sorry I think you must have the wrong number"

"Oh OK no problem, I will get the record updated.....do you know Mr xxx?"

"No, never heard of him, is this about a loan application because I've been getting text messages on my mobile about a loan"

"I'm afraid I can't tell you any details because of data protection"

"OK, so the loan is not being applied for in my name"

"No Sir, its a Mr xxx at postcode xxxxx" (so much for that privacy eh?)

"Do you know my name?"

"No Sir"

"Good - lets keep it that way and please remove my phone number from your systems too"

"No problem sir, sorry to have bothered you"

 

10 minutes later - more automated texts, another call from their collections department which went dead after I answered....now I know its not in my name, both numbers blocked.

[barefoot]

Smart motorways.

The fair wife works just off J28 of the M1

The journey time from here at J24 varies between about 33-38 minutes in normal traffic conditions.

Tonight, there's a lorry broken down just north of the junction and the journey time heading North is 90 minutes.

Before smart motorways, it would have pulled onto the shoulder and no one would have even noticed.

Brilliant.

[MikeR]

I either need to get about 20 cameras fitted to everything I drive or just stop driving I think.  You couldn't make up the nonsense I seem to be seeing almost daily these days.

 

no , just bang your car up a bit

 

 

my car has a dented rear offside wing ( not my fault , some scum who pissed off ) , however this war wound seems to say "back off"  to a lot of posher cars !!

[MikeR]

mean while at home I spend all day painting the downstairs doors with gloss , which is still drying , when I remember I have to feed man's best friend

 

 

who promptly gets excited , stands up on his back legs ,

 

and reverses his hairy arse into a nearly dry door  .........

[Timewaster]

I can pop in Saturday and have another word with him if you want?

Officially?

 

Or are you just going to wander in and say " my mate wants your old Mazda. His name is Mister Bollocks! "

[Zelandeth]

no , just bang your car up a bit

 

 

my car has a dented rear offside wing ( not my fault , some scum who pissed off ) , however this war wound seems to say "back off"  to a lot of posher cars !!

 

Scruffy looking 28 year old Merc camper van missing a bunch of bits of trim...Thought that would have put the fear into them.  Likewise the Lada with the wing tops made of duct tape...Nope!

 

Probably the scruffiest car I've owned was the first Xantia (in fairness, she was a 200+K mile car, so a few war wounds were fair!), that just seemed to attract cash-for-cash idiots at least once a week. 

 

Given the roads round here are more or less all 70mph dual carriageways with a roundabout every 0.9 miles they're a serious problem here.  Usual MO is to slowly drift into the right hand lane in front of you then slam on the anchors (at which point you also discover that they have no brake lights).

 

I did report the first few times this happened to the police, before being asked to "please stop wasting our time with crap like this" when I called 101 to report the second time that I'd nearly been taken out by the same untaxed, un-MOTed and uninsured Mondeo on the same half mile long stretch of road which would have made it really easy to find them!  Have to admit I gave up after that.

[Mr_Bo11ox]

No news from Mazda 929 dude today. I will probably call him tomorrow and if I can't get any closer to a deal, attempt to block the whole thing out of my memory

[sierraman]

They leave you hanging these fuckers sometimes. I'd want to be winching it onto the beavertail by tomorrow morning, unable to sleep with excitement at the thought of spending hours looking it over on the drive followed by a huge row when the wife gets in from work.

[Captain Furious]

Check the earth strap. Try a jump lead from the block to the neg side of the batt as a quick test.

Removed the starter motor tonight, fortunately it’s one of the very few jobs that are possible without too much effing and blinding. Definitely bolloxed, hooked up to a battery on the floor and still doesn’t want to turn. Dismantled it and the brushes are toast, solenoid is a bit hit and miss too. Debated a DIY refurb but I can’t be arsed if I get it all back together again and it still doesn’t work...

 

So looking at probably another 200 quid bill on top of the 400 already spent and 400 still needed to be spent on tyres. Great...however I did look at potential replacements for the same 1000 budget and there is fuck all anywhere near as decent at that price range, plus I know my air con works. So best the devil you know eh

[dollywobbler]

They leave you hanging these fuckers sometimes. I'd want to be winching it onto the beavertail by tomorrow morning, unable to sleep with excitement at the thought of spending hours looking it over on the drive followed by a huge row when the wife gets in from work.

 

Which I suspect they know and understand all too well. Hopefully as long as I don't call them again, they might realise that really, only one person wants it.