The grumpy thread

[calebaaront]

On the day of my Daimler Hearse passing it’s MOT, this happens. Body shop has quoted £400

[omegod]

Did an oil change on the qashqai, what a bollocks these huge undertrays are , new clips on order !!

[UltraWomble]

How come range meters are hopelessly optimistic? 

[Metal Guru]

29 minutes ago, UltraWomble said:

How come range meters are hopelessly optimistic? 

Because the designer isn’t the one who has a long walk if they run out.

[scaryoldcortina]

I've always found VW have the largest reserve amount after it says it's empty, there's often still over a gallon remaining in the tank.

[myglaren]

When my C5 said the range was 0 I could still get at least 60 miles out of it.

And filling it up, could get 72L in the 65L tank.

[Metal Guru]

1 hour ago, scaryoldcortina said:

I've always found VW have the largest reserve amount after it says it's empty, there's often still over a gallon remaining in the tank.

Possibly so you don’t have starting problems if parked on a slope. There’s enough petrol when signalling empty, to ensure the pick up pipe is covered and the pump won’t pump air (especially imp for diesels).

[artdjones]

20 hours ago, UltraWomble said:

And now wankers who wobble because they loaded the Mondeo arse first onto the trailer...
Why would you do that?

 

Because you're from a certain demographic in Ireland who rules don't apply to? That rig must be right on the towing limit, or over.

[jakebullet]

Cunts next door are attempting to piss off the maximum number of people possible with top quality* parking. After Mrs. Cunt got a nice visit from the 5-0 she stopped parking touching Hazel's car, which was a win for a while.

However, this weekend Hazel has Mr. Cunt's pikey tipper touching her bumper, so she's less than happy. The £30,000 cat S disco 4 is now parked a bit further up, in such a position that the next 2 houses to Hazel struggle to get past the bastard to get off their drives. So that's 3 annoyed on the other side of the street.

But wait, there's more! Pikey tipper is in the street because round the back there's pikey tipper #2 appeared. This is a kicked to fuck example that is SORN, no insurance, and crucially is parked badly so it's going to block access for 7 more houses to get out. Mrs. Cunt isn't capable of driving manual cars, so that's 7 who's going to find getting to work a soupcon difficult in the morning. Assuming he's not going to be driving that one around illegally of course.

Yes, I know I'm just green with envy that I don't own 2 shit pikey tippers and a written off disco 4.

[GrumpiusMaximus]

On 21/04/2024 at 18:12, scaryoldcortina said:

I've always found VW have the largest reserve amount after it says it's empty, there's often still over a gallon remaining in the tank.

It's about five litres on the reserve, based on my experience of a MK4 Golf.

[andy18s]

9 hours ago, jakebullet said:

Cunts next door are attempting to piss off the maximum number of people possible with top quality* parking. After Mrs. Cunt got a nice visit from the 5-0 she stopped parking touching Hazel's car, which was a win for a while.

However, this weekend Hazel has Mr. Cunt's pikey tipper touching her bumper, so she's less than happy. The £30,000 cat S disco 4 is now parked a bit further up, in such a position that the next 2 houses to Hazel struggle to get past the bastard to get off their drives. So that's 3 annoyed on the other side of the street.

But wait, there's more! Pikey tipper is in the street because round the back there's pikey tipper #2 appeared. This is a kicked to fuck example that is SORN, no insurance, and crucially is parked badly so it's going to block access for 7 more houses to get out. Mrs. Cunt isn't capable of driving manual cars, so that's 7 who's going to find getting to work a soupcon difficult in the morning. Assuming he's not going to be driving that one around illegally of course.

Yes, I know I'm just green with envy that I don't own 2 shit pikey tippers and a written off disco 4.

I'm sure the insurance must cost more than buying the Disco 4,Shirley?

[cobblers]

15 hours ago, scaryoldcortina said:

I've always found VW have the largest reserve amount after it says it's empty, there's often still over a gallon remaining in the tank.

On my T6 I needed to drop the fuel tank to fit a dip tube for a diesel heater, so I ran it til it said "range 0 miles" and then did 17 more miles, driving fine.

Drove the front wheels onto some ramps, turned the engine off and realised I wanted to reposition it a bit and the bastard wouldn't start again!

When I dropped the tank there was no more than a litre left in, I was amazed the van even ran. Van does 25mpg so I would say that 0 miles means there's a gallon left in the tank.

[beko1987]

I don't trust my fuel needle for shit, and doing 50 mile round trips to work I've never dared try 😂

My friend used to run his hyundai i40 to 0 then do another 100ish miles though, many mornings we'd be smashing down lane 3 of the m40 with it showing 0 and been showing that since he picked he up 10 miles back! Guess you've got to do it to trust it... 

[jakebullet]

3 hours ago, andy18s said:

I'm sure the insurance must cost more than buying the Disco 4,Shirley?

Not if you get your bezzie m8 to stick it on his trade policy. Works great until she stacks it, or it's routine stopped and they realise she's not the hairy arsed bloke who's insured it.

[sheffcortinacentre]

Won't happen as it show as insured so not bothered.

[PicantoJon]

Fuck me sideways, the job I was on yesterday was a blast... 

'Can I plug it back in? I have work to do...' 

'Ol' mate fix`

'It's fine, just don't unplug it...' 

'Insert screwdriver here for a good time...' 

I give up. 

[Dick Cheeseburger]

200+ year old oak tree which is protected by a TPO apparently should be removed because it casts a shadow. Might as well chop down all trees, just to be thorough. 

 

[chadders]

We've got several horse chestnut trees, at least 2 of which we believe to be over 200 years old.

They're a complete pain with all the sticky bits that drop off, followed by the conkers which can do some damage if they've come from the top of the tree.

But they're part of the garden and provide homes for squirrels and birds so will stay.

[High Jetter]

They were there first, after all.

[sheffcortinacentre]

1 hour ago, Dick Longbridge said:

200+ year old oak tree which is protected by a TPO apparently should be removed because it casts a shadow. Might as well chop down all trees, just to be thorough. 

 

Yes

[Saabnut]

Late April and it is snowing  

[loserone]

Here too!

[scaryoldcortina]

Why are people able to leave blank reviews and why can't I remove them?

 

I have no clue who this was or why he thought three stars appropriate, Google doesn't even check for a verified customer.

[motorpunk]

Bye bye Golf. Hello insurance claim. Some bastards broke into our house last night and nicked the keys and drove off. Never woke us up. Didn’t touch anything else. Appearing soon in a robbery in Birmingham or ‘spair and reper’ online. Zero crime here in 25 years of living here, Golf here for 6 months and *poof* it’s gone, stolen to order.

[St.Jude]

2 minutes ago, motorpunk said:

Bye bye Golf. Hello insurance claim. Some bastards broke into our house last night and nicked the keys and drove off. Never woke us up. Didn’t touch anything else. Appearing soon in a robbery in Birmingham or ‘spair and reper’ online. Zero crime here in 25 years of living here, Golf here for 6 months and *poof* it’s gone, stolen to order.

It would depend on a few things, but this is likely to be parked up somewhere near by. They'll give it 2 weeks before moving it on as they want to see if there is a tracker on it.

Happened to a bloke I know with his Audi. He found it parked up. So maybe worth putting it out there and asking people to keep an eye out?

[beko1987]

5 hours ago, scaryoldcortina said:

Why are people able to leave blank reviews and why can't I remove them?

 

I have no clue who this was or why he thought three stars appropriate, Google doesn't even check for a verified customer.

We could all leave you good reviews with feedback? Chuck the link up and I'll do one 😂

[hairnet]

6 hours ago, Saabnut said:

Late April and it is snowing  

sleet here earlier and its well above freezing

[Zelandeth]

Finally, after months and months, managed to actually speak to my GP today.

I was in there for a grand total of three minutes and then seconds.  During which I think I managed to say about ten words.  Five of which were my greeting when I walked in.

Have we achieved anything?  No.  I've been referred for a group session cognitive behavioural therapy pain management course.

You know, maybe investigating the potential cause of the debilitating headaches might be more useful?   Or maybe prescribing something to offer at least some sort of relief for times when it becomes too much to put up with?  No?  However this gets me out their door and kicks the problem down the road for a year, so I guess ticks their boxes.  *Sigh.*

[artdjones]

2 hours ago, St.Jude said:

It would depend on a few things, but this is likely to be parked up somewhere near by. They'll give it 2 weeks before moving it on as they want to see if there is a tracker on it.

Happened to a bloke I know with his Audi. He found it parked up. So maybe worth putting it out there and asking people to keep an eye out?

Weirdly, back in the mid 80s I was instrumental in getting 3 different friend's cars back to them after spotting them in the street. 2 Marinas and a Mk 3 Capri. I was hoping it wouldn't happen again in case my friends all started believing that it was me stealing them, then "returning" them to make myself look good.

[High Jetter]

9 minutes ago, CGSB said:

I still go back to that Pistonheads "dominate the stairs" post every year or so for a laugh, where the guy on there detailed how he would fight off anyone that tried to take his keys in the middle of the night.

Yea, but, you can't defend if you're still snoring! I'm a heavy sleeper, my keys sleep in a basket on my bedside table. Mrs' keys are in the hall drawer, but she's a very light sleep.