The grumpy thread

[mercedade]

16 hours ago, TheDoctor said:

I spend my whole life either bodging and making do, or giving up and moving on to the next mess

I have more respect for someone who can do this, than someone whose whole approach is "ha LOL no idea I just pay someone".

Anyone who can bodge/make do gets a doffed cap from me - and same goes for people who know when they're beat.

No joke about it man - you're doing it more right than you realise.

[Cavcraft]

What a load of old bollocks that 'Desert Island Discs' is. Surely the first record anyone would want is the long distance swimming one?

[Datsuncog]

16 hours ago, TheDoctor said:

Fucking fed up with my total lack of talent or even staying power with anything. 

I spend my whole life either bodging and making do, or giving up and moving on to the next mess. This usually applies to cars, jobs, furniture, relationships and probably more. 

Just that. I'm a fucking joke. 

Not that it's much consolation, but you're basically describing me as well.

 

And I don't even have a Rover that will survive a zombie apocalypse.

[DoctorRetro]

35 minutes ago, Datsuncog said:

 

 

And I don't even have a Rover that will survive a zombie apocalypse.

Neither do I, it belongs to Billy now. I even gave up on that. ?

[MikeR]

Nooooooooooooooooooo.....

 

I have to go into Southport.   ..... Not the road to hell again ....

[mercrocker]

I think a common perception amongst some on here is that greatness has never been achieved, things have never been completed and that life is basically a good bit shittier than it could be.    I don't think those feelings are unique or common to only a few - it is just that many other people bullshit and overplay their own lives and make it seem as if we are "missing out".    Some clever fella once wrote to the effect that "the mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation".    We only make sense of it all when its nearly over......  

 It just seems ironic that those on here who appear the most self-deprecating actually have many of the most interesting things to say.    Chin up, fellas......

[somewhatfoolish]

22 hours ago, shedenvy said:

<snip>

- Sort out an electronic version of invoicing her clients (excel)

- Some sort of quoting system for potential new clients

- help choose an account to earn her the best interest rate on some money she's accrued.

- help her make a decision about moving to France and getting a UK loan to buy a property circa €40K in Brittany where my Mum & Dad live.  This is the only option she'll ever have to 'own' a property

Anyway, does anyone have any advice on how to tactfully say FO.  Or any free templates on how to invoice or prepare a quote for people - she only had about 6 clients a year so I guess quickbooks or similar wouldn't be practical.  Oh and her MS office subscription has run out so if anyone can point me to a cheaper version than £5.99 a month i'd also appreciate it.

Do you really need to be tactful about it; if you can't be blunt with a sibling who can you be blunt with? I second the Open Office suggestion, free is the best price.

How long is the money being invested for? As for the last one, good luck with that(how long is a piece of string, B****t, does she speak french, etc) . Will a UK bank loan money on a french property without making you jump through a million hoops? Especially as she's self-employed in a relatively precarious way.

[shedenvy]

@somewhatfoolish

This uk loan is apparently the best way. I would have thought a french loan for a french house makes more sense but apparently #BecauseFrance goverment didn't like that foreigners were buying property, getting bored and buggering off without paying the loan.  No it has to be over a certain amount like €125k or something.

However yes your statement about self employed jumping through hoops is almoast certainly the case.

Got round to asking ina round about way when she was planning on sleeping at her flat - might be on for Wedesday or Thursday once I've figured out how the boiler works, fixed the washing m/c and set up the freesat.

Oh and the gloss ceiling she did yesterday looks fucking awful. The emulsion is going to have a hard time covering it. How do you make such am obvious mistake? It smells of oil, it's called satinwood, it's so much thicker as it goes on FFS!

 

[myglaren]

6 hours ago, paulplom said:

I've used open office for over ten years. Great bit of kit and free to download.

I used to but Libre Office split off a few years ago.

It is very similar but as it is bundled with Ubuntu and Linux Mint then that is the one I use, simpler that way.

Also use Google Docs quite a bit as it is very easy to share with any interested parties.

[Lord Sterling]

On 5/13/2019 at 5:34 PM, TheDoctor said:

Fucking fed up with my total lack of talent or even staying power with anything. 

I spend my whole life either bodging and making do, or giving up and moving on to the next mess. This usually applies to cars, jobs, furniture, relationships and probably more. 

Just that. I'm a fucking joke. 

 

Don't worry so much about it man. I'm pretty much shit at most things and fairly average at others. I just had to accept it and keep trying to muddle my way through life. 

[Cavcraft]

2 hours ago, TheDoctor said:

Neither do I, it belongs to Billy now. I even gave up on that. ?

Ahh, but it doesn't mean you won't get any money out if it! Shall we advertise it on Facebook?

[GrumpiusMaximus]

ARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

[myglaren]

3 hours ago, shedenvy said:

@somewhatfoolish

Oh and the gloss ceiling she did yesterday looks fucking awful. The emulsion is going to have a hard time covering it. How do you make such am obvious mistake? It smells of oil, it's called satinwood, it's so much thicker as it goes on FFS!

 

Give it a good wash with degreaser (turps, meths etc.

Then with detergent and water.

Let it dry, rub it down with very fine sandpaper/wetordry.

Coat with undercoat - acrylic should be fine but may need two coats.

Finally refinish with emulsion.

If there is a Johnstone's/Leyland warehouse near you, I recommend Johnstone's paints.

They are also available but in limited ranges at B&B Bargain stores.

Less expensive than Dulux and the results of a recent empirical test a damn site better too. (currently redecorating here too)

Have used Johnstone's for years, after Sigma folded.

[ProgRocker]

Fecking traffic, caused by some roadworks near my area.

It took me 30 minutes to drive home from work - around 1.8 to 2 miles. This is just over what it would have taken me to walk. Once the roadworks are complete it should reduce my drive home by a bit. Drive to work at 7:35am = 5 minutes. 10 minutes at the

I end up catching the end of the school rush hour traffic as I now start and leave work a little earlier in the day.

I'm getting right royally pissed off with driving at the mo. Fecking traffic left right and centre. I may decide to sell my car and go without.

Edited May 14, 2019 by ProgRocker
corrected a word

[wuvvum]

10 hours ago, GrumpiusMaximus said:

Had an all-staff meeting yesterday at work.

At the end, the new Grand Overlord showed us a video of all of the good things that have happened over the last year.  Which was actually quite nice.

If it hadn't gone on for ten bloody minutes.  The worst thing is that everybody was still lapping it all by the end, braindead...

We had something surprisingly similar this afternoon.  A presentation about the harmonisation of job roles under the new combined corporate regime.

Pretty much the first thing that was said was "this won't result in any difference to your pay, and if you get a new job title it will be for internal use only, you won't be using it on external correspondence."

Righto then.  So we should give a fuck because...???

[stonedagain]

47 minutes ago, ProgRocker said:

Fecking traffic, caused by some roadworks near my area.

It took me 30 minutes to drive home from work - around 1.8 to 2 miles. This is just over what it would have taken me to drive. Once the roadworks are complete it should reduce my drive home by a bit. Drive to work at 7:35am = 5 minutes. 10 minutes at the

I end up catching the end of the school rush hour traffic as I now start and leave work a little earlier in the day.

I'm getting right royally pissed off with driving at the mo. Fecking traffic left right and centre. I may decide to sell my car and go without.

30 minutes to drive 2 miles? I owned a car like that once!

[brownnova]

18 minutes ago, stonedagain said:

30 minutes to drive 2 miles? I owned a car like that once!

I think that’s probably DollyWobblers progress in Twc today! 

[strangeangel]

On 5/13/2019 at 5:34 PM, TheDoctor said:

Fucking fed up with my total lack of talent or even staying power with anything. 

I spend my whole life either bodging and making do, or giving up and moving on to the next mess. This usually applies to cars, jobs, furniture, relationships and probably more.

 

Dude, what you have just described there is LIFE. Don't be so hard on yourself for just getting on with it.

[LostnotFound]

1 hour ago, ProgRocker said:

 

I'm getting right royally pissed off with driving at the mo. Fecking traffic left right and centre. I may decide to sell my car and go without.

Time for a motorbike surely? Especially in this weather. Even if you don't ever filter in moving traffic just rolling past the stationary queues will make you feel more relaxed than buddah on his hols to Amsterdam. 

 

But on a serious note yes traffic can get to fuck, rush hour is now 7am till 9:30am with a minor low spot around 10 am. Before it starts ramping up around lunch which rolls into school run then office traffic. 

Weekends are usually worse as every moron decides they really need to spend a nice day driving around various car parks shopping at the same places with the same stock as last week. Once the shops close the post pub lunch traffic is dicey at best. Sunday morning before the shops open is about the only time you can actually enjoy being on the road. 

[richardmorris]

Madness on the roads this morning. Is it a full moon? Riding in at 8am I hear a small motorbike engine coming behind then a. Crash, horn and shouting. I stopped and turned round and a Saab turning right has hit a motorbike overtaking sending him over the bonnet. He gets up though.  It’s recorded on my rear camera and does show the Saab stationary and indicating before turning into the side road. If a yellow police sign goes up I’ll contact them with the footage. Not entirely sure it’s all the car driver’s fault but they should have used their mirrors I suppose before the manoeuvre, then the biker shouldn’t have been overtaking indicating traffic at a junction.

 

On the way home just now, it’s gone six and quiet, until someone passing ( didn’t even slow down i wasn’t holding them up), shouts something out of an open window. Before turning without indicating cutting the corner and nearly hitting a car coming the other way.

Finally I turn right in Bagshot at the mini roundabout, with no traffic front, rear or side. A second or two later hear a large engined something roaring up behind, there’s no room to pass because of a zebra crossing with traffic island in the middle. This is no problem to Porsche 4x4 driver with penis number plate though who drives on the wrong side of the road , island and keep left arrows forcing the oncoming car to swerve to a halt. But he then has to stop 20m further on as the lights are red. As I pull up behind, he’s on the phone. I’m very tempted to send this footage into the police. 

 

All this is doing nothing to help stop mid-week alcohol!

[GrumpiusMaximus]

Dob him in.  He'll kill someone before too long.

[BorniteIdentity]

On 5/13/2019 at 5:34 PM, TheDoctor said:

Fucking fed up with my total lack of talent or even staying power with anything. 

I spend my whole life either bodging and making do, or giving up and moving on to the next mess. This usually applies to cars, jobs, furniture, relationships and probably more. 

Just that. I'm a fucking joke. 

 

Ah man. 

I promise you that having everything new, and everything perfect does not lead to complete happiness. Nirvana doesn’t lie beyond a big bank balance and a lass with big jugs and a small waist. 

As others have said, it’s life. It’s not equal, but it is what you make it. (I’ve had to learn this). And your life? Well it’s described brilliantly by Carole King and the song I’ll have played at my funeral. 

“My life has been a tapestry of rich and royal hue
An everlasting vision of the ever-changing view
A wondrous woven magic in bits of blue and gold
A tapestry to feel and see, impossible to hold”

 

Keep buggering on, man. 

[strangeangel]

2 hours ago, ProgRocker said:

Fecking traffic, caused by some roadworks near my area

I'm getting right royally pissed off with driving at the mo. Fecking traffic left right and centre. I may decide to sell my car and go without.

 

The Bikeshite thread is over here - JOIN US!

[shedenvy]

The sister saga continues....

We go over to her flat last night to sort out:

A. washing mc cold water feed - purchased and fitted 2.5m hose. Done.

B. free sat box not working. Last worked fine when I plugged it in. No idea. Bodged on terrestrial aerial so DTV available.

C. Boiler controls infathomable to a technophobe. All seemed logical to me but calor gas bottles have run out and landlord ordering replacements so unable to test.

On way back at exuberant speeds in the Multipla, pigeon or owl decides kamikaze is the order of the day. £75 on my insurance.

 

[5speedracer]

@somewhatfoolish
This uk loan is apparently the best way. I would have thought a french loan for a french house makes more sense but apparently #BecauseFrance goverment didn't like that foreigners were buying property, getting bored and buggering off without paying the loan.  No it has to be over a certain amount like €125k or something.
However yes your statement about self employed jumping through hoops is almoast certainly the case.
Got round to asking ina round about way when she was planning on sleeping at her flat - might be on for Wedesday or Thursday once I've figured out how the boiler works, fixed the washing m/c and set up the freesat.
Oh and the gloss ceiling she did yesterday looks fucking awful. The emulsion is going to have a hard time covering it. How do you make such am obvious mistake? It smells of oil, it's called satinwood, it's so much thicker as it goes on FFS!
 

If you need to cover gloss, varnish etc. use Zinsser B-I-N. Not cheap but it works.

Sent from my Redmi 4 using Tapatalk

[Bobthebeard]

Another grump about inconsiderate and selfish parking.

Dropped Mrs Beard off at a school where she was working for the day. Small ish car park with parking spaces in the middle and around the edges, vivid yellow hatchings and NO PARKING writ large on the ground to allow cars to enter and exit the (fenced off rectangular) car park through two gates. In and out. Goes in, Mrs B wanders off and I go to leave. Large black new Audi parked on the yellow hatchings blocking 70% of the exit route.. Hmmm. Left my car, went into reception to ask if they know who owns it, can they move it etc. No joy.

Had to reverse out three sides of the (small) rectangular car park, avoiding all the properly parked cars and attempt to exit through the entrance. 

Whilst faffing about doing this another car had parked badly, but just about in a space, meaning I had to reverse through a gap just about* large enough. It wasn't. Four foot long scrape down passenger side of the car on the stone wall ensued. I was livid. Partly because I had hit the wall, but mainly fuming at the driver of the Audi. As usual they were fine and got away with it, I raked a wall with my newly and recently smartened up old Honda FFS. 

[somewhatfoolish]

20 hours ago, ProgRocker said:

Fecking traffic, caused by some roadworks near my area.

It took me 30 minutes to drive home from work - around 1.8 to 2 miles. This is just over what it would have taken me to walk. Once the roadworks are complete it should reduce my drive home by a bit. Drive to work at 7:35am = 5 minutes. 10 minutes at the

I end up catching the end of the school rush hour traffic as I now start and leave work a little earlier in the day.

I'm getting right royally pissed off with driving at the mo. Fecking traffic left right and centre. I may decide to sell my car and go without.

You could walk it in 30 minutes and work off pies at the same time, plus walking will work up an appetite for more pies. Winning. Or use a bicycle, even a fat knacker like me could do 2 miles in 12 minutes or so.

[Exiled_Tat_Gatherer]

18 hours ago, GrumpiusMaximus said:

Dob him in.  He'll kill someone before too long.

Not particularly wanting to argue here - but who will kill someone?  The biker?

Car driver is sitting and waiting to turn, gap opens up - he takes it...…. he's indicated his intent to other users. Biker - I feel for him - but I would NEVER go around a car indicating! You have no fucking clue when they will 'go for it'. That is completely and utterly the bikers fault - I wouldn't wish it on anyone, but he gambled and lost. Hope he is OK and can walk away and learn from it all.

I'm sure there's no-one to 'dob in' - it was a crash, the biker, by the sounds of it, isn't exactly pootling off into the sunset. Old bill will already be in the know………

[wuvvum]

I assume Grumpius was referring to the cockwomble in the Cayenne.

[GrumpiusMaximus]

Yes.  I was.