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Posted

Insurance specifically excludes dry rot... (To be expected really, the lying, thieving charlatan bastards etc.)

Tbf the quote does include a re-render of a gable end wall - ground to eaves, (though the survey showed no sign of water ingress from there - it's just a suspect atm as the render is not in good condition); treat the dry rot, replace the timber floor in that room and a quarter of the timber floor in an adjoining room; put three vents into the house's three chimneys and six underfloor vents to reduce underfloor condensation (place turns out to be 112 years old and may only have a damp proof course in the extension, though the survey found no rising damp anywhere). Survey showed no evidence that dry rot was caused by sewer malfunction or chimney problems.

 

Dry rot treatment ~1k. Rendering ~6k. Timber floor and vents ~5k.

 

It's the house we used to live in about 10 years ago in south wales before we turned all pikey and went a-travelling. It's had tenants in for much of that time but they left without giving notice two months ago. They reported a problem with the sewers 6 months ago which we had sorted by dynarod - they cleared a blockage and surveyed it, reporting it as AOK. No further complaints from tenant, so we were a bit surprised to find one months rent not showing up and a letter from the council informing us that council tax would be waived as the property is empty. We have no desire to be long distance landlords again so just want it sold, but it won't cover the mortgage in its current state. Mrs CW wants to ask the chap quoting if he could put a concrete floor in instead and would it be cheaper.

 

Sent from my BV6000 using Tapatalk

Posted

I don't drink. Does this mean I can never watch Withnail &I? Not that I have much wish to, from what I've read and heard, but you know....

No, it doesn't mean you can never watch the film. But if you have no wish to watch it anyway then why ask?

Cult late 80s comedy film set in 69. Hope you enjoy it if you watch it.

Posted

Did you get a breakdown of costs to see how the £12k was arrived at? If it's a gut job for the ground floor including removing/ replacing plaster (it can spread behind plaster) then £12k is probably not excessive. Has your damp-course been bridged or under floor vents been blocked up. Until the cause has been found and rectified it would not be wise to start repairs. You have my sympathy, it'll be a horrible job

This ^

IIRC you replaced or treated 1m beyond where you can see the dry rot is, as the spores spread that far.

Posted

moviprep....... urrrgghhh. 

 

Another litre at 6pm. Fucking great :(

Posted

 

Dry rot treatment ~1k. Rendering ~6k. Timber floor and vents ~5k.

 

 

 

The concrete idea sounds good, but its not cheap and very heavy, could cause other problems.

I'd tend to do the treatment and timber floor, that has to be done.

Leave the Rendering for now, survey said it wasn't causing problems.

This cuts your bill in half.

House would then be fine to rent.

If you put it up for sale, rendering may get spotted on buyers survey, and they knock you down £6000, or may be accepted as is.

  • Like 2
Posted

Moviprep - second litre. I swear there is nothing actually left inside me. This includes internal organs. Please....... help........ me.

  • Like 2
Posted

^^ PMSL. I can totally relate. Thank fuck I never got the dates wrong.

Posted

I now hate the taste of vaguely lemony.

 

Not sure if I am going to shit or puke. I may possibly do both. Simultaneously.

Posted

It's like reverse K seal.

 

The agent picolax thread is why the internet was invented :-)

  • Like 2
Posted

This fucking stuff is going through me like a fucking Bullet Train. My innards have gone and have been replaced by a straight through exhaust system, no cat, no baffles, no back box.

 

After the two scopes tomorrow I am stopping off at Tesco's to buy a loaf and a gammon joint. That will be the biggest fucking sandwich of ever.

Posted

I swear I have lost 2 inches from my belly. I feel like my internal bits are fucking teflon coated, 'cos there is there is no way that anything is sticking around.

 

I really would quite like to pass out now. 

Posted

This is why no one makes up stuff about needing intestinal examination.

Posted

I'll tell you my own tale if I may, maybe as a precautionary warning , I attended Whiston Hosp for a bumscope a few years ago and didn't need the bowel prep as I was getting a little something on arrival. A very small tube of stuff was squirted up my hoop and I was told to keep this in for a minumum 15 minutes before using one of the many toilets that lined the corridor in the waiting area, I don't know how I managed 15 secs as the urge to release was like something I've never felt before or since. I sat in the waiting room with another half dozen blokes ,who it quickly became apparent, had been given the same bum potion as I could see them wince with every spasm , sweaty foreheads all round,and mucho belly burbling was going on, one by one we caught each others eye's and began to chortle at the absurdity of the situation , one guys belly made a massive rumble which we had a giggle over but one guy found it so funny he crucially lost focus for a millisecond and shat himself right there and then. I ran and locked myself in the bog for fear of doing the same.

 

Sure you'll be fine though!  :-)

 

Godspeed PBK and enjoy the post scope farts, they are phenomenal. 

Posted

I'll tell you my own tale if I may, maybe as a precautionary warning , I attended Whiston Hosp for a bumscope a few years ago and didn't need the bowel prep as I was getting a little something on arrival. A very small tube of stuff was squirted up my hoop and I was told to keep this in for a minumum 15 minutes before using one of the many toilets that lined the corridor in the waiting area, I don't know how I managed 15 secs as the urge to release was like something I've never felt before or since. I sat in the waiting room with another half dozen blokes ,who it quickly became apparent, had been given the same bum potion as I could see them wince with every spasm , sweaty foreheads all round,and mucho belly burbling was going on, one by one we caught each others eye's and began to chortle at the absurdity of the situation , one guys belly made a massive rumble which we had a giggle over but one guy found it so funny he crucially lost focus for a millisecond and shat himself right there and then. I ran and locked myself in the bog for fear of doing the same.

 

Sure you'll be fine though!  :-)

 

Godspeed PBK and enjoy the post scope farts, they are phenomenal.

 

Thanks for posting that! Properly made me laugh!

 

 

 

Not sure if I am going to shit or puke. I may possibly do both. Simultaneously.

Been there done that.

I was rather violently ill one morning a while back. I got out of bed and instantly needed to go to the loo so I legged it in and sat down just in the nick of time only for the whole world to fall out my arse! At that moment my guts also started churning and I puked while sitting on the can mid shit!

It was literally pouring out of both ends unstoppabley, the floor around the toilet was just a huge puddle of puke, all over my feet and everything.

 

It was awful at the time but funny now. Anyway, best of luck Ken.

  • Like 1
Posted

I'll tell you my own tale if I may, maybe as a precautionary warning , I attended Whiston Hosp for a bumscope a few years ago and didn't need the bowel prep as I was getting a little something on arrival. A very small tube of stuff was squirted up my hoop and I was told to keep this in for a minumum 15 minutes before using one of the many toilets that lined the corridor in the waiting area, I don't know how I managed 15 secs as the urge to release was like something I've never felt before or since. I sat in the waiting room with another half dozen blokes ,who it quickly became apparent, had been given the same bum potion as I could see them wince with every spasm , sweaty foreheads all round,and mucho belly burbling was going on, one by one we caught each others eye's and began to chortle at the absurdity of the situation , one guys belly made a massive rumble which we had a giggle over but one guy found it so funny he crucially lost focus for a millisecond and shat himself right there and then. I ran and locked myself in the bog for fear of doing the same.

Sorbitol in sugar free mints has the similar making you shit yourself very badly every 2 mins effect. Ask me how I know.

  • Like 1
Posted

Been there done that.

I was rather violently ill one morning a while back. I got out of bed and instantly needed to go to the loo so I legged it in and sat down just in the nick of time only for the whole world to fall out my arse! At that moment my guts also started churning and I puked while sitting on the can mid shit!

It was literally pouring out of both ends unstoppabley, the floor around the toilet was just a huge puddle of puke, all over my feet and everything.

 

It was awful at the time but funny now.

 

Our bathroom is helpfully designed so you can not only be sitting on the bog draining the sump but also, if an accelerated reverse peristalsis scenario manifests unexpectedly, by turning your head slightly to the right you can fill the basin with the recent contents of your entire gastric system.

 

Haven't tested this myself, but Musical Offspring did when he was about eight...

  • Like 3
Posted

Our bathroom is helpfully designed so you can not only be sitting on the bog draining the sump but also, if an accelerated reverse peristalsis scenario manifests unexpectedly, by turning your head slightly to the right you can fill the basin with the recent contents of your entire gastric system.

Mine too.  I knew there had to be some point having a tiny house!

Posted

& Me3 :)

 

.... Good friends ONLY apply for a 'shit 'n shower' though :(

 

 

TS

Posted

University halls of residence had ensuites where it was feasible to shower while on the loo, while brushing your teeth.

 

Never tried it mind.

Posted

We had a bidet next to the bog, just removed it because A. I'm not posh and B. Never used it. I have no safety net for double trouble, my sink is 8ft from bog, projectile vomiting only

Posted

Sat indoors on a lovely sunny day waiting for world superbike and world supersport races on euros port, 4 red flags so far

Posted

To add to a shit week it now appears one of our cats is on its last legs and may have gone off to die and I have pulled something big time in my side and am in agony. Roll on Monday.......

Posted

I'll tell you my own tale if I may, maybe as a precautionary warning , I attended Whiston Hosp for a bumscope a few years ago and didn't need the bowel prep as I was getting a little something on arrival. A very small tube of stuff was squirted up my hoop and I was told to keep this in for a minumum 15 minutes before using one of the many toilets that lined the corridor in the waiting area, I don't know how I managed 15 secs as the urge to release was like something I've never felt before or since. I sat in the waiting room with another half dozen blokes ,who it quickly became apparent, had been given the same bum potion as I could see them wince with every spasm , sweaty foreheads all round,and mucho belly burbling was going on, one by one we caught each others eye's and began to chortle at the absurdity of the situation , one guys belly made a massive rumble which we had a giggle over but one guy found it so funny he crucially lost focus for a millisecond and shat himself right there and then. I ran and locked myself in the bog for fear of doing the same.

 

Sure you'll be fine though!  :-)

 

Godspeed PBK and enjoy the post scope farts, they are phenomenal. 

 

Nice one. Rancid grapefruit juice has a similar affect, btw.

Posted

Mrs fp showed me the agent picolax story a month or so back when she was preparing to have the botty camera i thought it was hilarious, she wound herself up about the effects of the picolax for no reason, she took it and it didnt cause a poo volcano

Posted

& Me3 :)

 

.... Good friends ONLY apply for a 'shit 'n shower' though :(

 

 

TS

 

.... may have misrepresented, here.... I mean only a very close intimate would agree to showering happily, but let someone in who 'dumped the frog' >> 3 foot away... Ooof!!

 

TS

Posted

Just sold the Escort to a collector back in the UK

Things have obviously changed since we made the move out here and tbh it was going to be left sitting for a while once i got it shipped out

Doubling it's value in the short time I had it helped to ease the sting a bit though..

  • Like 2

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