What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[HarmonicCheeseburger]

 

[Metal Guru]

6 hours ago, hairnet said:

watching bangers and cash and derek is talking about singer chamois

better car than a mini better engine than a mini and even tho built by them lot up there

still better built than a mini

compliment i think?

hes right tho

 

They also said “better handling than the Mini”. Surely not? I thought the Mini’s handling was sensational for the time , whereas the Imp had the engine hanging way out the back .

Never driven either , just what I was led to believe. Anyone with experience of both?

[Aston Martin]

On 18/01/2023 at 16:20, goosey said:

To be fair I do like the Old Town and will probably have a walk around the Marina after the work is complete, it’s just I wouldn’t be a able to pull the kind of shit that the salesman gets away with that bugs me, it’s like he’s Teflon coated 

 

How did you enjoy the fucking roadworks?

[cobblers]

Took the "scenic" route home last night and ended up in a few puddles.

I knew it would be mucky but it was pitch black when I got back. Here's the result, no wonder the headlights didn't seem very good 😅

 

[Wack]

Costco petrol

E10 137.9

E5 146.9

Premium diesel 159.9

Queues like it's 50p a litre as usual, pulled on to the pump and both of them had £20 fill ups, the one in front of me was a driving instructor 

[Tenmil Socket]

21 minutes ago, Wack said:

Costco petrol

E10 137.9

E5 146.9

Premium diesel 159.9

Queues like it's 50p a litre as usual, pulled on to the pump and both of them had £20 fill ups, the one in front of me was a driving instructor 

I use the one in Haydock, St Helens but beginning to question myself as to why due to the massive queues... I do fill the tank though.

[Wack]

1 hour ago, Tenmil Socket said:

I use the one in Haydock, St Helens but beginning to question myself as to why due to the massive queues... I do fill the tank though.

That's where I was, constant stream of cars in and out to the petrol station, it's 6p a litre cheaper than shell on the east lancs 

[Tenmil Socket]

1 hour ago, Wack said:

That's where I was, constant stream of cars in and out to the petrol station, it's 6p a litre cheaper than shell on the east lancs 

A rough calculation shows I save £3 per tank. 

[goosey]

16 hours ago, Aston Martin said:

 

How did you enjoy the fucking roadworks?

I was unfazed 

[Aston Martin]

Just now, goosey said:

I was unfazed 

😢

[goosey]

3 minutes ago, Aston Martin said:

😢

I’ll be honest I’d rather be stuck in roadworks than be in the Office 😀

[iainrcz]

Describing an air freshener she bought, my Mrs said "it's a bit clawing"

Daft cunt 🤣

[Wack]

1 hour ago, Tenmil Socket said:

A rough calculation shows I save £3 per tank. 

If I queued up in the range rover SC it'd cost me £10 by the time I got to the pump

[Wack]

Just now, iainrcz said:

Describing an air freshener she bought, my Mrs said "it's a bit clawing"

Daft cunt 🤣

We went to a funeral on friday, first into the function suite after the service, we both went for a pee , the toilets are shared by the pub and the function suite L for pub R for suite , I come out and she's stood in the pub looking bewildered so I go in and she says, is this where we came in , the pub looks like a pub, the function suite is big round tables with white table cloths and white chairs

er, no, this is the pub

[iainrcz]

11 minutes ago, Wack said:

We went to a funeral on friday, first into the function suite after the service, we both went for a pee , the toilets are shared by the pub and the function suite L for pub R for suite , I come out and she's stood in the pub looking bewildered so I go in and she says, is this where we came in , the pub looks like a pub, the function suite is big round tables with white table cloths and white chairs

er, no, this is the pub

They're special.

Reminds me of the time my Mrs tried getting in the wrong car when I went to pick her up from work.

 

[jakebullet]

Ma was talking to Hazel across the street. Hazel is a big fan of cunts next door due to their habit of parking 2mm away from her car to intimidate her.

Well a bit back CND bought his n hers range rover sports, which are of course top quality cars and never break down. Turns out the one 2mm from Hazel's bumper is fucked and doesn't run. So she has CND hammering on her door to move her car so he can get it on a pikey recovery truck. What a shame she was suddenly hard of hearing and didn't hear a thing. Took them quite a long time to push it up hill to be able to get it out and on the truck. She waits till they're strapping it down and strolls out and drives away.

[Rust Collector]

My mrs brought this home tonight for the little one:

I’m looking forward to bath time so I can see what new letters are in the ‘new and improved’ 72 letter alphabet, I’ve been using the crappy old one with 26 letters.

[somewhatfoolish]

The world's gone mad, etc. By next year I'll be able to sell mine and retire on the proceeds. WTAF.

[High Jetter]

2 hours ago, Rust Collector said:

My mrs brought this home tonight for the little one:

I’m looking forward to bath time so I can see what new letters are in the ‘new and improved’ 72 letter alphabet, I’ve been using the crappy old one with 26 letters.

It doesn't say they're all different. Am a bit confused about 'Wet, Stick and Play!' though.

[Rust Collector]

1 minute ago, High Jetter said:

It doesn't say they're all different. Am a bit confused about 'Wet, Stick and Play!' though.

What’s confusing about those instructions? Grab a stick from the garden, dunk it in the bath water and then play with it 😅

[wuvvum]

We're finally out of fucking January. 🕺

[Datsuncog]

Probably shouldn't be laughing at this, but interesting* to find out that you're as likely to find a heinous bodge carried out on the reactor of a nuclear submarine as on a grotty old Laguna from the armpit of Facebook Marketplace.

Royal Navy orders investigation into nuclear submarine ‘repaired with glue’ | Royal Navy | The Guardian

The faulty repairs on the cooling pipes aboard the HMS Vanguard were found after one of the bolts fell off during an inspection, the Sun reported.

The bolt heads originally came off due to over-tightening. But, rather than replacing the damaged shafts, staff at the defence contractor Babcock implemented a quick fix and glued them back on.

Engineers at the contractor reported it as a procedural glitch after the problem was found, but did not mention the botched nature of the repair.

The glued bolts held insulation in place on the coolant pipes in the nuclear reactor and were found just as workers were set to fire it up to full power for the first time, the newspaper reported.

Investigators will trawl records of repairs to find out when the bodged work occurred and who was ultimately responsible.

A navy source told the newspaper: “It’s a disgrace. You can’t cut corners with nuclear. Standards are standards. Nuclear standards are never compromised.”

 

*interesting = terrifying

[somewhatfoolish]

7 hours ago, Datsuncog said:

Probably shouldn't be laughing at this, but interesting* to find out that you're as likely to find a heinous bodge carried out on the reactor of a nuclear submarine as on a grotty old Laguna from the armpit of Facebook Marketplace.

Royal Navy orders investigation into nuclear submarine ‘repaired with glue’ | Royal Navy | The Guardian

The faulty repairs on the cooling pipes aboard the HMS Vanguard were found after one of the bolts fell off during an inspection, the Sun reported.

The bolt heads originally came off due to over-tightening. But, rather than replacing the damaged shafts, staff at the defence contractor Babcock implemented a quick fix and glued them back on.

Engineers at the contractor reported it as a procedural glitch after the problem was found, but did not mention the botched nature of the repair.

The glued bolts held insulation in place on the coolant pipes in the nuclear reactor and were found just as workers were set to fire it up to full power for the first time, the newspaper reported.

Investigators will trawl records of repairs to find out when the bodged work occurred and who was ultimately responsible.

A navy source told the newspaper: “It’s a disgrace. You can’t cut corners with nuclear. Standards are standards. Nuclear standards are never compromised.”

 

*interesting = terrifying

Shitty but not terrifying, at least not directly, an insulation clamp falling off will only result in sweaty tiffs being slightly sweatier; that fitters who think this is an acceptable way to behave are anywhere near a submarine is a concern and I hope Babcock receive a large corporate wedgie. Shades of the glued on bolt heads on an RN patrol ship recently.

[High Jetter]

41 minutes ago, somewhatfoolish said:

Shitty but not terrifying, at least not directly, an insulation clamp falling off will only result in sweaty tiffs being slightly sweatier; that fitters who think this is an acceptable way to behave are anywhere near a submarine is a concern and I hope Babcock receive a large corporate wedgie. Shades of the glued on bolt heads on an RN patrol ship recently.

Are they not torqued up, and failures removed and the bolt suppliers bollocked? It is worrying if this wasn't an isolated incident.

[Wack]

[High Jetter]

1 hour ago, Wack said:

Pressed for a comment, he could only manage "Ta, Mac"

[Dick Cheeseburger]

Haven't we got a few Iveco fans on here? 🤣

[High Jetter]

58 minutes ago, Dick Longbridge said:

Haven't we got a few Iveco fans on here? 🤣

This keeps springing up...

[omegod]

I got a £20 voucher free for Sports Direct/USC after buying a load of stuff in November so ordered a Berghaus T shirt online on 14/12 , no sign of it so in early January I contacted USC who promptly sent me a replacement one, I was very surprised when the original order turned up today !  

You gotta love Evri in this case   

 

[Remspoor]