The grumpy thread

[jakebullet]

I think I've been a bit food poisoned. All this last week I've had gut ache, shits etc.

 

Said to Ma I'll have sausages today. Got some out of the freezer and they're not properly frozen. Investigation with laser thermometer has temperature ranging anywhere from +2 to -10, so freezer is fucked at a quick guess. I had sausages last Sunday as well, and they was shite, so guessing that's source of poisoning. I'd put shiteness down to Ma having face on as usual cos I'd dared to go out and have fun.

[purplebargeken]

^^ Good luck.

[Frogchod]

I'm in my old stopping ground for a weekend in October without Mrs Frogchod. Great chance to get together with old mates and go for a few* pints

Except so far two are under orders from their Mrs' and two have given up the evil alcohol.

FFS all I miss from the UK is real beer and curry

 

Perhaps they've heard I'm still driving about in unfashionable motors ?   

 

Theale / Beenham area if anyone's up for too much beer and a curry on the 22/23rd....

[Rocket88]

0625 this morning, fuelling up the truck before end of shift at the Shell garage on the Ilminster bypass roundabout. BMW one series parked up outside with a couple of likely looking lads therein.

Waiting behind driver of said conveyance at the checkout, he doesn't have enough cash to pay a can of Red Bull, leaves it on the counter, and returns to his car.

I pay for fuel with card, and exchange light banter with bloke behind the counter. Red Bull bloke returns with a mit full of shrapnel to pay for caffeine infused shite.

I walk out, and perambulate truck wards...........someone behind me shouts "Paedo!". I turn round to see passenger in Beemer madly pointing at the bloke in the back in a "It was him" gesture.

I slowly walk over to the Beemer, open the back door, and enquire of the fat gobshite within the nature of his problem. At this point the Beemer driver emerged, rushed over, started up, and sped off, still with the back door open. Gobshite nearly fell out....

W.T. actual F. ?

[RoadworkUK]

I went to Halfords today.

[messerschmitt owner]

I've been cutting up a car today! More fun than Halfords!

[RoadworkUK]

I should probably elaborate on the above.

 

Haven't been to Halfords for A Very Long Time, but I gave Mrs RoadworkUK a lift to work, whence we would continue for a nice drive in the country after she's done the couple of things she needed to do. Anyway. I was in town, Halfords, also, was in town, so I and they became one.

 

Needed more P38 ready to embark on the final cosmetic making good of project Bridge? No Fear on wifey's 306. I also bought some primer, a brush and a pair of amusingly hopeless looking "sanding sponges" for a few shekels each.

 

I also had want of a Bilt Hamber Clay Bar. I've never tried it before, and Halfords On Line reckon they can supply one for some £10.49. I fancied seeing if I can miracle up a bit of "new car shine" on the Audi, so I went over to the 'detailing' section, where it wasn't.

 

Shrugging, in the same way I do when my most local branch of Argos inevitably has everything in except anything I need, I went to the till.

 

"Alright buddy?" He asked.

 

After I shuddered, vomited, smashed his head against the "Wipers Fitted For £5" sign, released his lapel from my grasp and calmed down I asked him:

 

"Bilt Hamber Clay Bar. Regular. £10.49. Do you have one in stock?"

 

"Built, sorry. What?"

 

With the aid of a few diagrams and a game of charades I saw the low-wattage light bulb dimly illuminate above his head, and his lips straightened as if to break troubling news,

 

"Ah. Web exclusive, I'm afraid m"

 

He stopped short of saying "Mate."

 

I bloody hate this Web Exclusive bollocks. Customers should be rewarded for making the effort to go INTO the shop. Instead, by actually visiting the retailer's premises in the flesh, they run the risk of being spoken at in ASBO TXT SPK language by people who probably only just know which facial orrifice to stick their Vapestick into, only to then find the item you're after is either not in stock, only stocked in certain branches, or not stocked AT ALL.

 

Of course. If I'd stayed at home, visited the Halfords website and bought my stuff without leaving the sofa, it would all have been delivered to my very house FOR FREE! No postage charge with orders over £20! I need not have have struck up a relationship with mushybrains!

 

What annoys me THE MOST, is that I only went in for P38 and that clay bar and Halfords granted me only 50% of what I was looking for. Yet, I still bought some other things. ON IMPULSE. Because I was in the shop, and that's what people do in shops.

 

Just bloody close and save me the bother of trying. Harrumph.

[Cavcraft]

'Have you still got the (push)bike and what's the best you can do on it?' 

 

Yes it's still here and about 25mph, maybe 30 down a steep hill.

 

{silence}

[Kiltox]

Buy the G3 clay mitt instead - makes it 100000x quicker and easier than a bar

[dome]

I should probably elaborate on the above.

 

Haven't been to Halfords for A Very Long Time, but I gave Mrs RoadworkUK a lift to work, whence we would continue for a nice drive in the country after she's done the couple of things she needed to do. Anyway. I was in town, Halfords, also, was in town, so I and they became one.

 

Needed more P38 ready to embark on the final cosmetic making good of project Bridge? No Fear on wifey's 306. I also bought some primer, a brush and a pair of amusingly hopeless looking "sanding sponges" for a few shekels each.

 

I also had want of a Bilt Hamber Clay Bar. I've never tried it before, and Halfords On Line reckon they can supply one for some £10.49. I fancied seeing if I can miracle up a bit of "new car shine" on the Audi, so I went over to the 'detailing' section, where it wasn't.

 

Shrugging, in the same way I do when my most local branch of Argos inevitably has everything in except anything I need, I went to the till.

 

"Alright buddy?" He asked.

 

After I shuddered, vomited, smashed his head against the "Wipers Fitted For £5" sign, released his lapel from my grasp and calmed down I asked him:

 

"Bilt Hamber Clay Bar. Regular. £10.49. Do you have one in stock?"

 

"Built, sorry. What?"

 

With the aid of a few diagrams and a game of charades I saw the low-wattage light bulb dimly illuminate above his head, and his lips straightened as if to break troubling news,

 

"Ah. Web exclusive, I'm afraid m"

 

He stopped short of saying "Mate."

 

I bloody hate this Web Exclusive bollocks. Customers should be rewarded for making the effort to go INTO the shop. Instead, by actually visiting the retailer's premises in the flesh, they run the risk of being spoken at in ASBO TXT SPK language by people who probably only just know which facial orrifice to stick their Vapestick into, only to then find the item you're after is either not in stock, only stocked in certain branches, or not stocked AT ALL.

 

Of course. If I'd stayed at home, visited the Halfords website and bought my stuff without leaving the sofa, it would all have been delivered to my very house FOR FREE! No postage charge with orders over £20! I need not have have struck up a relationship with mushybrains!

 

What annoys me THE MOST, is that I only went in for P38 and that clay bar and Halfords granted me only 50% of what I was looking for. Yet, I still bought some other things. ON IMPULSE. Because I was in the shop, and that's what people do in shops.

 

Just bloody close and save me the bother of trying. Harrumph.

Yeah, sorry. I'm gonna bite.

 

As an ex Halfords employee(bike hut sales manager for what it's worth) it's worth you knowing a few things.

 

1. Staff are not well trained. It's a Halfords thing. They can't be arsed. I avoided as best I could letting management know I was car savvy as they'd get me fitting wiper blades all fucking day and ignoring my department. Your man may not have been at the top of the evolutionary chain but it sounds like he was trying to help. Crazy as it may seem, he won't know every single product or brand that they sell.

 

2. Web Exclusive. It's a clue-if you'd try to reserve it via click and collect then it'd say it would be a few days before you could get it from a particular store. The information is there, if you look for it.

 

Halfords as a company are a shower of arseholes, don't get me wrong. However they are an easy target for folk to take a shot at and its not always the poor sod on the shop floors fault.

 

Apologies if I sound like a cunt. Too long in retail. The customer is always right? My fucking arse he is.

 

*This post may have been fuelled by beer.

[RoadworkUK]

*This post may have been fuelled by beer.

Yep, as somebody who has worked in retail for 12 years until finally escaping three months ago, I knew all that. And I'm drinking Highland Park right now, too.

 

"Web Exclusive" and "Buddy" still annoy the shit out of me, though. And I may have exaggerated the actual level of violence I exhibited.

 

In fact I was embarrassingly polite, even offered to take my own basket back to the front door. He knew nothing of the fury brewing in my fragile little mind, ready to boil over in a shameful torrent of keyboard warfare.

 

(You'll have to forgive me, I'm really not very good at being grumpy)

[Mr_Bo11ox]

Halfords sucks major league spaceman c0ck 24/7 y0

[RoadworkUK]

See, why can't I think of concise, acerbic summations like that?

[dugong]

Eating £180 of fail after my 960 turned into a fugging smoke machine.

 

Wafted me back with PURE SKILL and CLASS last night from Maidstone; spent an hour at Lakeside Essex cleaning the bastard. Should have gone for the turn off marked 'ARENA' instead.

 

It's not all lost. Not yet. On Tuesday I'm gonna bust out the INDUSTRY CONTACTS and ask them in a squeaky voice to help (possibly sobbing as that seems to work on the X Factor).

[xtriple]

I quite like our local Halfords. Not because they are any good or the staff knowledgeable or anything like that ('cos they aren't) but because they are local. Useful being able to go at 8:00p.m. to get some piece of crap you'd be stuffed without and the staff are all friendly and usually reasonably helpful... and I can park right outside as they have a big carpark and I have a cripple badge

 

I like supporting local shops just because they are there. I go to the little shop round the corner at least twice a week and always buy loads more than I need, I just like the fact the guy is there, open when I need him and I'd very much like that to continue!

 

The internet is great (and I buy the vast majority of my stuff online) but it is fuck all use on a rainy Sunday when you need something NOW.

[Eddie Honda]

Halfords sucks major league spaceman c0ck 24/7 y0

 

Only Mon-Sat. If they have what I desperately need on a Sunday or their Professional tools on 1/2 price offer then they are the dogs doodahs.

[Cavcraft]

One of my local Halfords is pretty good to be fair. The bike department are helpful, good at their job and friendly and the car bit even more so.

[twosmoke300]

'Have you still got the (push)bike and what's the best you can do on it?'

 

Yes it's still here and about 25mph, maybe 30 down a steep hill.

 

{silence}

 

Brilliant ! Missis is now wondering why I woke her up with laughter

[twosmoke300]

Bastard fucking useless cockwarbling met office . I check the forecast last night before agreeing to today's ride . Just cloudy - no rain . Wake up to it pissing down . Check forecast 6 am it says light rain at 8 . Check it again at 6.30 it says heavy rain at 7 , light at 8 and light rain this eve . Fuck me I could look out the window and get a better forecast

[purplebargeken]

I like going to our local Halfords. The counter girl is bloody gorgeous, always smiling and even talks to me quite a bit.

[RoadworkUK]

Have to admit, they have had some absolutely tip-top girls behind the counter before. You're right.

[cobblers]

Yeah, when I worked there there was always at least one good looking but usually quite stupid 18 year old girl on the workforce at all times. Only one of them was stupid enough to let me get across her, She was lovely.

She now a flippin area manager at DHL or something which makes me feel incredibly old.

[xtriple]

Todays grump is not Halfords related.... but it is related to the garage which I rent. It is fucking useless at keeping my cars clean and dry which sort of defeats the object! Had to go and meet Paul (Specialist cars) up there to get the BGD out for him to fuck about with and charge me a fortune as usual and even though the Bentley was covered it was still as damp as fuck on the outside and the Mazda is covered, yet again in what I think is bat shit. I have put the new car cover on the Mazda (after cleaning it of course) but I reckon the garage is a lost cause.

 

Also, when I spoke to Paul last week he was confident that the car would be in for one day only, but this morning... he was a bit less sure. No idea why, maybe he thinks he hasn't relieved me of enough cash yet this year? I am also incredibly grumpy anyway as, once again, I have not slept. It cannot continue as I am so knackered it's untrue and I seem to be unable to sleep until I am soooooo fatigued that I just collapse in a heap and sleep. This constant pain is truly wearing.

[Supernaut]

I've just come home after spending all of an hour and a half at work.

 

I have some sort of flu / virus thing that makes my arms and legs weak and my brain feel like it's wobbling around inside my head. Bleh.

[twosmoke300]

Flu / hangover ?

[Supernaut]

Wasn't drinking last night.

 

I know what a hangover feels like, and this isn't it.

[dean36014]

In agony today after yesterdays stroll around the Citroen show. Had a GP appointment this morning and my MRI results still aren't in after 2 months, GP has requested them as urgent and nothing, zilch. At least he's up my meds to something slightly stronger and also discussed my memory issues. It really sucks getting older, I'm 46 trapped in an 70 year old body!

[Cavcraft]

Don't some sellers make life hard? I've been chasing a couple of things for a bit now, the vendors just deciding to reply randomly after days of nothing. Finally pinned one of them down to a viewing day after probably 3 weeks of half arsed messages from him, now he's just mailed and asked if I definitely want it as someone else wants to view it. That earned my stock reply of 'let him have it, I'll find something else'.

[strangeangel]

Don't some sellers make life hard?

 

Don't they just. I've spent three months hassling an eBay breaker to sell me a door off a BX estate he's parting out. All he's done is makes excuses as to how he's not been able to get to the car, and can't even manage to check the front inner wing for the paint code. I only went to this much effort because I think it's the same colour as my car and it wouldn't need painting. However, after the last round of stupid answers - "I forgot to check the paint code but it's an old car so it will be faded anyway"... it's the same age as mine, you cock - I lost what little remained of my patience and told him to shove it. Why advertise the fucking thing if you don't want to/are unable to/are too retarded to sell it?

[Mr_Bo11ox]

I'm sure I heard someone ranting on here once before about trying to deal with some mental old git who had a yard full of BX's from which he 'sold parts' but actually buying anythign off him was nigh on impossible. where was your seller?