The grumpy thread

[cms206]

T5 works for me and insurance is CHEAP AS M8.

 

But I am also rooked and can't afford to add a fourth Volvo to the fleet.

 

 

Arses

[warren t claim]

I'm pretty sure we haven't had this grump before.

 

Racist Prostitutes.

 

I had 4 Asian lads in my taxi tonight who'd all been to a party and their bollocks were full of Eastern promise and were wanting to continue their enjoyable evening with some extra marital fun of the fiscal variety. They asked if I knew of a 24 hour brasshouse that was reasonably local and being a cabbie with a extensive knowledge of the seedier side of 0151 I took them to a place in Bootle that not only is open 24 hours but they tip any driver that brings them business at the usual rate of £20 per punter. Now with four horny lads on board I was expecting a decent payday of £80 introduction fee plus £30 for the taxi and another £20 waiting time while they enjoyed some female company. I turn up at the massage parlour and inform the maid that I've got four happy punters on board and all goes well until she notices that they're Asian and refused point blank to let them in.

 

In any other walk of life this would be frowned upon.  

[robinmasters]

Been awake since five. As is usual under these circumstances, I've been wide awake until now, but my eyelids are just starting to droop, just as its getting to the time the alarm goes off.

[fordperv]

Mr t claim that is really shocking, business must be really good at said brass house if they can afford to turn 4 paying customers away

[dugong]

WTC! WTF? Brass gaff clearly has no money troubles.

 

For the sake of equilibrium I also have two broken Volvos just to even the balance up.

[Pillock]

They should ring the Daily Mail, that story sounds like something they'd get involved with.

[xtriple]

I've been up all night as well. Bloody body is fooked. If I was a motor I'd be over the bridge by now for sure. The only thing on me that still works properly is the exhaust and that is MOST efficient!

 

Ended up taking Morphine and ora morph again (on top of fentanyl) so I've spent the last few hours scratching like a hobo with fleas and just at the point where I thought I 'might' get some kip, the bloody phone rang, the physio (dear God she's GORGEOUS!!!)  wanted to come round to bring me an excercise sheet and a pressie. She turned up an hour later with a new walking stick with a special handle so I can only use it in my right hand to stop me doing it wrong and screwing up my dodgy left shoulder.

 

Still, this new stick is metal so the next time that puppy nicks it with a view to chewing it to shreds, he's got a nasty shock coming! 

[Richard]

A crow has just tried to steal the DAB antenna off my van, it nearly managed too. That'll teach me to park in Livingston.

[Jim Bell]

 

I'm runnin round your van. Stealin all your ariel stuff.

[Bren]

Why do wheelbarrows come with pneumatic tyres? About as much use as an ashtray on a fireblade.

 

Years of inactivity plus being left outside mean that when you want to use the bastard thing the tyre is flat.

 

Mine would'nt hold air, I blamed valve until I pressed on tyre and saw it had the integrity of a pair of fishnet tights.

 

Had to borrow a barrow, will need to order a wheel with solid tyre.

[Bobthebeard]

Why do wheelbarrows come with pneumatic tyres?

Prams come with pneumatic tyres also..... Another waste of oxygen.

[dollywobbler]

Pneumatic tyres can be good. Our garden is hideously uneven, with some small steps. A lot easier to get a pneumo tyre over than a solid one. We've got a sack truck with pneumo tyres too. It's astonishingly good. Easily one of the best things we've ever bought. That and a saw bench with a chainsaw mount on it. I R LUMBAJACK!

 

However, as this is the grump thread, I'll grump about the sodding weather. Every time I get my chainsaw out, it starts bloody raining! It's an electric chainsaw.

[HH-R]

Had my coolant bled three times by two different garages, tried myself and it's still gurgling

 

My patience is running extremely thin with it.

[sporty-shite]

For the sake of equilibrium I also have two broken Volvos just to even the balance up.

TWO Volvos? Do tell.......

[chaseracer]

I R LUMBAJACK!

 

However, as this is the grump thread, I'll grump about the sodding weather. Every time I get my chainsaw out, it starts bloody raining! It's an electric chainsaw.

 

 

 

Sorted.

[dave21478]

Pneumatic tyres can be good. Our garden is hideously uneven, with some small steps. A lot easier to get a pneumo tyre over than a solid one. We've got a sack truck with pneumo tyres too. It's astonishingly good. Easily one of the best things we've ever bought. That and a saw bench with a chainsaw mount on it. I R LUMBAJACK!

 

However, as this is the grump thread, I'll grump about the sodding weather. Every time I get my chainsaw out, it starts bloody raining! It's an electric chainsaw.

 

offtopic....

 

This kind of thing?

 

Is it any good? I was sniffing one in the DIY shop the other day and couldnt decide. Ideally I want a big circular saw log chopper, but a decent one is €500+ so thats out of the question.....

 

My worry with the chainsaw one is the wood I have is very well seasoned and mega-hard so blunts the chain in no time.

[Bren]

Had my coolant bled three times by two different garages, tried myself and it's still gurgling

 

My patience is running extremely thin with it.

What car?

[HH-R]

Mk3 Panda. They are total shit. Or mine is anyway, they seem to have a decent rep with everyone else.

[dollywobbler]

offtopic....

 

This kind of thing?

 

Is it any good? I was sniffing one in the DIY shop the other day and couldnt decide. Ideally I want a big circular saw log chopper, but a decent one is €500+ so thats out of the question.....

 

 

 

The very badger. Can get a proper chop on. My wood is soft though, so the chainsaw just rips through it. I don't leave it outside though - build quality isn't the best and I reckon it'd rust in no time. It can't cope with HUGE lumps of wood very well. 

 

At a local show, there was a tractor with a HUGE circular saw on the back, and a happy bloke chopping ridiculous hunks of timber. That's the next level I reckon. Looked ridiculously dangerous.

[Craig the Princess]

Car insurance (again). How can a Saab 900 be £150 more to insure than a Rover 220 Coupé?

[The Moog]

The 900 was £200 cheaper than the Civic!

[Craig the Princess]

Say whaaaaaaat? Bizarre.

[dave21478]

The very badger. Can get a proper chop on. My wood is soft though, so the chainsaw just rips through it. I don't leave it outside though - build quality isn't the best and I reckon it'd rust in no time. It can't cope with HUGE lumps of wood very well. 

 

At a local show, there was a tractor with a HUGE circular saw on the back, and a happy bloke chopping ridiculous hunks of timber. That's the next level I reckon. Looked ridiculously dangerous.

 

Thanks, I will have a think about it.

 

There are lots of this sort of thing for sale locally...

http://www.leboncoin.fr/bricolage/729082935.htm?ca=16_s

 

But they all look like a guaranteed trip to A&E. That particular one has the blade mounted the wrong way round too, for added risk of getting the log smashed into your face as well as hacking your arm off.

 

I kinda fancy making one. I built a log splitter a while back which I slightly* over-engineered and could probably split engine blocks with it

http://retrorides.proboards.com/thread/155646/giant-log-splitter-build#.VGEmhfnF-lA

 

 - but the price of buying the bits to make a saw...motor, blade, pulleys, drive belt, blade mount etc adds up quickly too, to say nothing of finding the time to do it.

[nacho man]

Worst day Eva so far. Topped oil up in mr2, it's using a bit not good at all. Forgot to put cap back on. Drive off. Oil everywhere. Fiddle sticks. Then I get back pissed off, stand on missus ghd expensive hair straighteners, they break, give me a break, go to see a mate, get a parking ticket, what else is gonna happen!!!!

[320touring]

Back at work...

[Jazoli]

I am sick of listening to stupid moronic twats who's vocabulary is so limited they have to say 'like' every other word, an example is a work colleague, 'Its only like 39 pounds a month' I did ask whether it was 38 or 40 and just got a blank look, do fuck off.

[Cavcraft]

I just liked that, like.

[Jazoli]

I just liked that, like.

You mean you just like liked that don't you?

 

My daughter is the worst, top marks at school, studying English at uni, sounds like a stupid american brain dead bimbo, like.

[dave21478]

Cutting out fizzy pop, most alcohol, crisps and sweeties has meant that I have lost a fair bit of weight.

Why is this in the grump thread? I am now no longer heavy enough to close my tipping trailer. It tips with help from two massively powerful gas struts, and when you drive a car up it, it closes itself with the weight of the car. Previously, to close it when it was empty I just sat on the front edge and it pushed the struts in and I could latch it but now I am no longer fat enough. Gonna have to make some kind of lever or something.

[Alan_Green]

Why do wheelbarrows come with pneumatic tyres?

 

For bumping up kerbs etc.