The grumpy thread

[Wilko220]

Yeah, this is defo going to make the power-mongering world leaders think twice. WELL DONE TWATS.

 

 

 

http://www.bristolpost.co.uk/Air-cadets-distraught-Bristol-anarchists-torch/story-22874098-detail/story.html

[wuvvum]

  On 04/09/2014 at 13:42, daveb47 said:

Take air filter hose off carb

Rev engine as much as possible

While revving put hand over intake for a second or so till it almost stops then release keeping throttle as wide open as you can,repeat a few times.

Hopefully this will draw water/shit etc though jets and clear them.

Cheers, might give that a whirl.  I also thought of trying revving it up as far as it will go, turning the ignition off until the revs die right down then turning it back on again to see if I can make the bike backfire - don't know if there's any chance of that working though.

[dollywobbler]

Backfiring isn't going to cure it though. I've employed the hand-on-carb trick many times with 2CVs. DO NOT WEAR LATEX GLOVES. 

[twosmoke300]

Re the rover pulley bolt. It's not the springeyness of the bar that is the problem . It's how to lock the crank solid. If you just put it in gear then all you do is wind up the clutch hub springs and risk damaging them. Impact gun or the proper locking tool ftw.

[drum]

Thought I'd dodged that bullet. 'Sake.

[purplebargeken]

5 mins from home. Road blocked by what appears to be all of the police in Edmonton/Enfield/London/the UK. Police chopper hovering overhead.

 

Hmm. Drug bust? Routine traffic stop? No insurance? Nope. 

 

Get home to be told that some fuckwit has decapitated a woman and a cat. I knew I hated the area. Police have the fuckwit, quite impressive, however, It'll be the one covered in blood officer.

 

seems like he stayed put after the deed which has to put him in the following categories:

 

1. Complete raving nut job.

 

2. Jealous ex-partner.

 

3. Jihadi wannabe

 

4. Jealous ex-partner raving nut job.

 

I'm going for #4

 

We are all a bit doomed aren't we.

[Cavcraft]

/\

Sorry, according to Facebook it was a Muslim/all mosques should be burnt to the ground immediately/send them back/don't belong here/we were warned about this/there's a lot of them in that area/it's not stereotyping/I'm not racist/send them back.

[purplebargeken]

Andy Love (himself) MP wheeled himself out and made a comment to some news hack. He included this gem:

 

“This is a relatively solid community with relatively good relations between all of the people living there. It comes as a shock that it has happened.

 

Oh really? What part of the fucking multiverse did you just drop in from. Oi, Love...... the area is an arse pit, 99% full of fuckwits. Especially the road that contains my sister in law. Oddly it was the same road that the poor woman and cats were decapitated.  

[purplebargeken]

Oh, and overuse of the word 'relatively'. Twat. 

[Lankytim]

Maybe her head just fell off by itself?

[Cavcraft]

Good job she didn't LMFAO, that would have been messy to clear up.

[Asimo]

  On 04/09/2014 at 17:00, twosmoke300 said:

Re the rover pulley bolt. It's not the springeyness of the bar that is the problem . It's how to lock the crank solid. If you just put it in gear then all you do is wind up the clutch hub springs and risk damaging them. Impact gun or the proper locking tool ftw.

Now I have not tried this: what about hydraulically locking the engine by filling the front cylinder with oil?

 

Would have to be 90 deg. ish before tdc on the compression stroke or on the power stroke at about 90deg. after tdc depending on which way the engine runs.

[Richard]

I think a less messy version of that is feeding rope into the spark plug hole.

[purplebargeken]

Seems it was an 82 year old woman (rumour has it). Easy target for a passing nut job with a sharp implement. Hello Broadmoor/3 Bridges. 

[sporty-shite]

  On 04/09/2014 at 18:31, purplebargeken said:

Oh, and overuse of the word 'relatively'. Twat. 

It's all relative.

 

[Bren]

I was wondering why the batteries on the SD1 and busa have not responded to being charged.

 

Answer = fuse has gone in charger.

 

New 30A fuse fitted - lets see what happens.

[Noel Tidybeard]

  On 04/09/2014 at 12:56, dave21478 said:

My own grump - supposed to be a quiet day off work today but its been shattered by builders setting up scaffolding right outside my fucking window.

 

Seems that the neighbours are getting some bloody awful looking exterior insulation and faux rendering nailed to the outside of their house. 

P1000802.JPG

 

To the left is the access to my garden and garage, so now I cant get cars in and out. Before they got too far along I moved the car out into the street.

 

"How long will you be here for...a couple of days?" I asked, thinking that a long weekend at home might be just the tonic to revive flagging moral.

 

"Be about 3 weeks" the dude replied.

 

3 weeks? THREE WEEKS? how the fuck is it going to take them three weeks to do that, they are only doing two walls.

And then they fucked off sharpish at 11.45 for lunch and its now 3pm and they are still not back yet - thats why its going to take them three weeks.

did anyone ask permission to block your access?

[HillmanImp]

Well, thats the last time I will be using 'auto lights' on the Jaguar.

 

Going over Otley chevin this morning it was probably the worst fog I have ever experienced. You could not see more than a few feet ahead of you so I had my front and rear fog lights on. The headlights were also on as the car had decided that it was dark enough for them.

 

At some point at the top of the chevin the car decided it was light enought to turn off its lights, INCLUDING THE FOG LIGHTS and not think it was necesarry to turn them back on 30 seconds later when I decended back into the pea soup.

 

I wondered why people were flashing at me for half a mile until I realised I had no lights on FFS.

 

Technology can go and bite my shiny metal ass.

[dave21478]

This is France. Nobody gives a fuck about stuff like that. Tradesmen are a law unto themselves.

 

If I closed off a road and put up a wobbly scaffold on it, the mayor would be round pronto and would bring whatever clipboard wielding official he thought necessary to have me bollocked and make me take it down, but because this is being done by a registered business they can do whatever the fuck they want and nobody bats an eyelid.

 

 

 

They never came back yesterday afternoon and its now 9am and no sign of them arriving so far today either. It seems that these guys follow the traditional French tradesmans working methods of doing a day here, and afternoon on a different job, a couple of days on a job miles away, another day here, then the rest of the week elsewhere...basically working* all over the place but actually achieving fuck all progress anywhere.

[Jim Bell]

Spend a few hours loosening bolts.

It's probably quite therapeutic.

[dave21478]

Im thinking more along the lines of how cozy my loft would be if some of those styrene panels found their way up there.

[Jim Bell]

Well it is pretty windy. Stuff like that probably blows away all the time.

[Asimo]

  On 05/09/2014 at 07:02, dave21478 said:

 

They never came back yesterday afternoon and its now 9am and no sign of them arriving so far today either. It seems that these guys follow the traditional French tradesmans working methods of doing a day here, and afternoon on a different job, a couple of days on a job miles away, another day here, then the rest of the week elsewhere...basically working* all over the place but actually achieving fuck all progress anywhere.

 

So, basically, French building trades are like English building trades, but left hand drive.

[Parky]

Dear owner of Black S-Max that I parked next to at Lakeside earlier.

 

Thank you so much for slamming your front AND back doors into the side of my car adding additional dents to it. In particular thank you for chipping off a nice big lump of paint right on a swage line which will be impossible to sort without respraying the door. In addition the scratches down the side where you squeezed your fat arse against my car were a nice touch.

 

When I parked there, I was incredibly careful to not use your doors as a target for mine. I now realise this was wrong and I apologise profusely for not inflicting a couple of hundred quids worth of damage to your car when I parked there.

 

In a world gone wrong, where lunatics roam the streets and the planet teeters on the edge of destruction, you are still a cunt of the highest order. Karma is a bitch my friend, Karma is a bitch.

 

Regards, Parky

[beko1987]

Time to go hunting...

[Sigmund Fraud]

I am starting to think that honest, responsible people are a dying breed.

 

One more reason to be driving around in decrepit, old shitters. If someone scratches or dents your car, chances are you won't even notice !

[Angrydicky]

  On 05/09/2014 at 14:02, Parky said:

Lakeside.

Says it all unfortunately, that place does tend to attract all the utter cretins from this area en masse. Commiserations, I had the exact same thing happen to the Maestro three days after a full respray, so I know how you feel. 

[EssDeeWon]

Fuggin ass holes! For the 2nd time this year there has been fraudulent activity on my bank account. Today I notice my balance is down by £429.98, call the bank and this morning someone used my debit card details to buy some electrical equipment for £359.99 and £69.99 spent at Lego!? 

 

Should get the money back but its still infuriates me, having my bank account almost emptied and now having to wait for this back, could be today could be Monday or Tuesday! 

 

My bank (Santander) are pretty good but I detest these pond life thieving unts who make a living from obtaining details.

 

I have one suspicion, the guy I gave my details to when buying car insurance @ Sureterm on Monday, that is the only person who could have seen or heard me say the debit card number / details etc....otherwise I have no idea how/who has pulled this off. 

[Parky]

  On 05/09/2014 at 14:29, Angrydicky said:

Says it all unfortunately, that place does tend to attract all the utter cretins from this area en masse. Commiserations, I had the exact same thing happen to the Maestro three days after a full respray, so I know how you feel.

 

Agreed. It's turned into the Jeremy Kyle show waiting room.

[Cavcraft]

Isn't Lakeside some sort of shopping complex?

For the ultimate LOLs just have a walk round the roundabout off the M53 that takes you to Cheshire Fucking Oaks shopping outlet. Chrimbo is best as a rule, they've put sort of fixed cones/poles in to stop the morons swerving across three lanes of traffic, but most are covered in the paint from myriad dizzy blonde bints in Minis and 4x4s, who clearly have their own set of rules.

It's absolute fucking carnage, CH4 could make a mint by just setting up some cameras and filming the best bits every day, you'd be stunned by the way some of these absolute knob warblers attempt to drive.