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What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread


outlaw118

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I genuinely think I'm developing some form of Tourette's lately

I sat an exam this week and, after making the examiner aware I'd finished, she escorted me from the room , she asked me quietly how it had gone.....I could have said "good", "not bad" but instead found it entirely appropriate to say " I've not been that nervous since my last prostate exam"    She didn't appear to be shocked but why the hell are things like this just coming out of my mouth without any filter.

Is it an age thing ?? I'm baffled ! 

 

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But if we give the marbles back what next?  We can't just go giving artefacts back to the people we stole them from, where does it end?  There'd be no cultural heritage left to display!

- Sir Barry Bumface, Richtwat-on-the-Hill, Little Britain

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1 minute ago, loserone said:

Perhaps you should contact the ottoman empire

I don't know about the rest of you, but I've always thought that if there isn't a furniture shop out there somewhere that's called 'The Ottoman Empire' then it would be really disappointing.

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1 hour ago, vulgalour said:

But if we give the marbles back what next?  We can't just go giving artefacts back to the people we stole them from, where does it end?  There'd be no cultural heritage left to display!

- Sir Barry Bumface, Richtwat-on-the-Hill, Little Britain

I'm told by a reliable sauce  HP.jpg.efb0a9d8f047f70f2a1707a13198ab25.jpg  that Rich O'soonback was just going to demand the rest of the Pantheon be repatriated to the Museum of Britains  as it was obviously part original purchase BUT the Greek Prime minister decided it was not to be discussed. 

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9 hours ago, DSdriver said:

Today is the day fifty years ago that MrsDS and I got married. Tomorrow will be the day that I was wondering how to remove the colourful stains on the white paintwork of my Triumph 2000 after the confetti had frozen on overnight.

I wasn't being cruel, but shirley you can only be unmarried if you've been married before - otherwise you're just single!

Anyway, Happy Anniversary. 🍺🍷🎉

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10 minutes ago, High Jetter said:

I wasn't being cruel, but shirley you can only be unmarried if you've been married before - otherwise you're just single!

Anyway, Happy Anniversary. 🍺🍷🎉

Thank you, the celebration is about to begin! I had read your post with the humour that you intended. 

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Sold an old Hoover I paid £20 at the car boot a few years ago for £400 earlier! 

That's Christmas saved 😂🎄 Buyer is happy too, apparently with this machine he has an example of every single Hoover vacuum ever made, and several nos parts for it like a brand new bag which tbh it does need

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