What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[High Jetter]

1 hour ago, Dyslexic Viking said:

This was great and also explains why parts of the lawn look like it does.

Well fertilised?

[Dyslexic Viking]

8 minutes ago, High Jetter said:

Well fertilised?

No more that it looks like several stoned moles have been there

[andy18s]

A few spots from today

[Tadhg Tiogar]

32 minutes ago, Dyslexic Viking said:

No more that it looks like several stoned moles have been there

I'd feel sorry for the mole that tunnelled its way into cat turd.

[D.E]

9 minutes ago, Tadhg Tiogar said:

I'd feel sorry for the mole that tunnelled its way into cat turd.

[beko1987]

He pulled his trump card and won the game 🙄

[anonymous user]

I hadn't noticed the bird, I thought the reference was to the Donald Trump mole in the post above 

[vulgalour]

19 hours ago, andy18s said:

 

Either something is wrong with my monitor/eyes or someone is lying about the  colour of that bus.

[wuvvum]

1 hour ago, beko1987 said:

He pulled his trump card and won the game 🙄

Yeah, playing dinosaur bingo against an actual dinosaur is never going to end well.

[Inca-mpetent]

18 hours ago, D.E said:

Oh damn, I remember that children's book(no seriously, it's a children's book)
"The mole who wanted to know who shat on his head"

 

Might have a copy somewhere at my parent's

[somewhatfoolish]

19 hours ago, D.E said:

Life imitating art.

[meggersdog]

Some thieving scote had a bad day

 

This car has a manicat, thieving scrote has nicked a silencer.

[meggersdog]

The police got back to me about the nasty old lady from my grump of the other day. They visited her yesterday and agree she is not safe to drive, the car shouldn't be driven until fixed (she is insured) and she should not be out on her own. They have arranged for a health visitor to, erm, visit.

[Rusty_Rocket]

20 minutes ago, meggersdog said:

The police got back to me about the nasty old lady from my grump of the other day. They visited her yesterday and agree she is not safe to drive, the car shouldn't be driven until fixed (she is insured) and she should not be out on her own. They have arranged for a health visitor to, erm, visit.

You did the right thing.

Years back my elderly neighbour started having a series of car crashes; stupid things like hitting the wrong pedal etc and knocking over walls.  It was only a matter of time until he hurt someone.  I had to jump through the most ridiculous hoops to get attention from the authorities, doctors appointments etc until he was called to a meeting at a local DVLA office.  He had to answer questions, they checked his reactions and took him out in a learner car.  They did revoke his licence straight away, which is sad but was unfortunately necessary.

[Tadhg Tiogar]

[andy18s]

4 hours ago, vulgalour said:

Either something is wrong with my monitor/eyes or someone is lying about the  colour of that bus.

I was wondering who would spot that 

[anonymous user]

7 minutes ago, Tadhg Tiogar said:

Could be handy, but what the hell does a church need a project manager for?

[Tadhg Tiogar]

3 minutes ago, anonymous user said:

Could be handy, but what the hell does a church need a project manager for?

It could turn out to be Hell...

[New POD]

30 minutes ago, anonymous user said:

Could be handy, but what the hell does a church need a project manager for?

No so much a church But a diocese. A multimillion pound organisation employing lots of people, owning lots of land, and buildings, working with lots of different community groups.  I wonder if they'd employ a none believer? 

[Remspoor]

14 minutes ago, New POD said:

No so much a church But a diocese. A multimillion pound organisation employing lots of people, owning lots of land, and buildings, working with lots of different community groups.  I wonder if they'd employ a none believer? 

You must believe in something, no?

[Tadhg Tiogar]

2 minutes ago, Remspoor said:

You must believe in something, no?

Mammon.

[New POD]

3 minutes ago, Remspoor said:

You must believe in something, no?

No. 

[mintwth]

2 hours ago, Tadhg Tiogar said:

Some might say the cut off ad must have been an act of god. 

 

Demons might be more use to a Diocese than a project manager. It's a fairly standard religious tactic. 

Q: How can we get more people to attend church (and give us their money)?

A: Scare them into it with demons! 

[3VOM]

6 hours ago, Inca-mpetent said:

Oh damn, I remember that children's book(no seriously, it's a children's book)
"The mole who wanted to know who shat on his head"

 

Might have a copy somewhere at my parent's

Isn't that book called What's on my head? Or something like that

[iainrcz]

Anyone want any windows fitting?

Last night and tonight, working in the pitch black 😆

They're just packing up, 22:40

[High Jetter]

2 hours ago, New POD said:

I wonder if they'd employ a none believer? 

What's a none? 

[Inca-mpetent]

Isn't that book called What's on my head? Or something like that

Probably, this is a translation of the title I know(the Dutch one)

Sent from my Redmi Note 9 Pro

[fairkens]

9 hours ago, iainrcz said:

Anyone want any windows fitting?

Last night and tonight, working in the pitch black 😆

They're just packing up, 22:40

Our neighbours had pointing done in a similar fashion this time last year. It is, unsurprisingly, a complete mess. Looks like Gulliver has spaffed all over the walls

[cort16]

Ford marketing meeting. What high class brand do we want to associate our new camper with?

How about McDonalds Chicken Nuggets and Neds that call each other pure fuckin nuggets while drinking buck fast in the park? That could work?

Ha Ha, you're a pure fuckin custom nugget man.

 

[somewhatfoolish]

Presumably available with Diddy, Roaster or Rocket option packs? I think even FoMoCo would draw the line at Bawbag.

Edit to add; I'd hope there would be room for a Dobber option too.