What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[hairnet]

saw a thumbnail for a i3 rex omg what wrong etc

americans

they get it up on the ramp and one of them 'i can smell fuel'

hes stood under the fuel tank but one of them says 

youre 2 inches from the vent tube

ffs

[maxxo]

Currently in the local wetherspoons

ive accidentally drank 16 pints

I’ve spent just under £16

letting myself loose for once and really enjoying it

nice to go out properly, I’ll be heading home at 10 to go to sleep

my sorta night out

[hairnet]

 

and apart from the cops arresting some guy that totalled their suv

these guys are doing 85 down the highway and getting less than 2.5 kwh but its only got 43 miles range wtf? on full - he just mentions the rex kicked in - at 85 mph im not surprised lol

[jakebullet]

50% off today at u pull it York. Quite a nice day out, DIY scrapyard but without dog shit / stacking / grumpy fuckers running it.

Wanted the biggest battery I could jam in the tray for the C1. Batteries are on a pallet, nobody cares that you're measuring sizes, or sticking a battery tester on the ones that are the right size to find the best one. £20 for one at 92% health that's £80 new.

Also in a world first got a parcel shelf. Chuffed at £12.50.

[maxxo]

Just now, CGSB said:

It was Worrhingtons so likely piss water

currently sipping on a glass of water and a red bull so I can be somewhat functional tomorrow 

[reb]

Can the human body even hold 9 litres of fluid in one go without exploding?

[High Jetter]

7 minutes ago, reb said:

Can the human body even hold 9 litres of fluid in one go without exploding?

He didn't say 16 pints without pissing! 

[reb]

1 minute ago, High Jetter said:

He didn't say 16 pints without pissing! 

Can it process the pints into piss that fast though?

I really don't know, I haven't been a beer/cider drinker for a very long time, I just drink entirely too much wine instead these days.

[Markeh]

Pretty sure I managed it (albeit with pissing) back when I was a student.

[primeradoner]

49 minutes ago, CGSB said:

If as I suspect Max is in The Five Quarter in Peterlee and has drank 16pints I can guarantee that there will be people  who have had more than him. Mrs PDs cousin for one.

[somewhatfoolish]

1 hour ago, reb said:

Can the human body even hold 9 litres of fluid in one go without exploding?

Probably not, from extensive empirical tests I have found that after the first few pints the rhythm of pouring it into my pie hole is interrupted by an overwhelming need to piss it out again, followed sometime later by an equally overwhelming need to fall asleep. The internet thinks an adult human stomach can hold 2 litres, but it's a holding tank for a highly sophisticated chemical processing system and it starts things off as soon as they arrive. At the other end the bladder can hold a bit less than a pint. Human beings are highly ill-suited to drinking anything in pints, never mind booze.

[Popsicle]

1 hour ago, Markeh said:

Pretty sure I managed it (albeit with pissing) back when I was a student.

You are about 7 foot tall, which must mean its got further to travel before coming out again 😀.

[High Jetter]

1 hour ago, reb said:

Can it process the pints into piss that fast though?

Dunno, I guess if it can't keep up the body does a Southern Water and lets it flow unprocessed?

[maxxo]

10 pisses

youd be correct about the pub as I don’t leave town for drinking

I’d been in there since 2ish

had some food as well to keep it down

its relatively easy if you space it correctly

[maxxo]

I can drink a very excessive amount

i don’t do it frequently, very rarely these days as it’s a terrible habit 

 

[maxxo]

12 minutes ago, CGSB said:

I can drink 20 pints, if I lie about it

In all honesty I do wish it were a lie

tomoreow wouldn’t be write off in that case

incouldnt do it with proper stuff, but I get the sense this is weak watered down drink so with relatively ease I can

 

as I say i don’t make a habit from it

 

feel free to join next time 😂 just give me time to recover haha

[Rust Collector]

27 minutes ago, CGSB said:

I can drink 20 pints, if I lie about it

I reckon someone could do 16 pints of 99p beer if they started in the afternoon, there can’t be that much beer in it. Piss a pint out, pour a pint in. Maybe throw in a tactical chunder if you outpace your bladder. Then go home, vomit some more, pass out, and have a three day hangover. Job done.

[maxxo]

21 minutes ago, Tayne said:

16 pints is 9088ml.

At 4% ABV, that’s 363ml of alcohol.

I’ll be generous and call that 36 units.

Assuming a 2pm start and instant process at a rate of 1 unit per hour, you should be safe to drive by 4am on Saturday morning.

Please don’t get in the car tomorrow.

 

Zero intention or need to drive until Tuesday

with the driving standards I’ve seen this week, I’ve been looking forward to a few days off

[jim89]

1 hour ago, High Jetter said:

Dunno, I guess if it can't keep up the body does a Southern Water and lets it flow unprocessed?

Back out the way it came in?

[Metal Guru]

I’m sure it’s possible if you’re all day drinking all day, say 10 am to midnight,. 14 hours . The  body can process a pint an hour of weakish  beer ( <4%). 

[myglaren]

[ProgRocker]

14 hours ago, maxxo said:

Currently in the local wetherspoons

ive accidentally drank 16 pints

If I did this today it would likely put me in a coma. 

[maxxo]

Just now, ProgRocker said:

If I did this today it would likely put me in a coma. 

I feel like I should be in a coma today 

[MikeR]

doorbell camera , very handy for looking at your frozen up car , then snuggling back into bed to listen to the neighbours scraping their cars ice off .

Looking back on the days when I would leave a fan heater in the car and flick the garage switch in the morning to defrost the car whilst I did the 4 S's and breakfast before going to work ...

[New POD]

13 hours ago, CGSB said:

I can drink 20 pints, if I lie about it

As @MikeR will confirm, 3 pints and my wallet gives up. 4 pints and I start vomiting.  

Over the whole Christmas break From Wednesday 18 Dec until 9 pm on New Year's Day, I have drunk maybe 15 units. 

At a new years eve party. I drank one unit. Interesting to see other people pissed thou. You realise how much shite they believe, but manage to keep to themselves until they've had 6 pints. 

[reb]

1 minute ago, Tayne said:

Shit

Shower 

Shave

and…..

A shoeshine? Sunny Delight? 

Serial?

[DavieW]

4 minutes ago, Tayne said:

Shit

Shower 

Shave

and…..

A shoeshine? Sunny Delight? 

Shag?

[Rust Collector]

5 minutes ago, Tayne said:

Shit

Shower 

Shave

and…..

A shoeshine? Sunny Delight? 

Shit

Shower

Shit

Shit

At least that’s the 4 S’s if I’ve had my early morning coffees on an empty stomach.

[myglaren]

 

[Matty]

16 hours ago, Metal Guru said:

I’m sure it’s possible if you’re all day drinking all day, say 10 am to midnight,. 14 hours . The  body can process a pint an hour of weakish  beer ( <4%). 

You'd think that wouldn't you. Years of practice and I still couldn't get to them limits!