What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[Wack]

All praise the British eccentric 

Best comment is his last three words , no shit

 

 

[wuvvum]

I couldn't quite catch what he said at the end?

[Wack]

Didn't make it , I don't think he'd have made it if he'd started off in Northampton 

[Wack]

I've hit a car in a car park 

Which one 

All of them 

[mitsisigma01]

8 hours ago, MikeR said:

finally got hold of a helpful human

Argos ...helpful human .. how the fk did you manage that .... Live chat is a bot ...fkin useless...no help on stock availability enquiry...no phone number for local store... Customer service human allegedly made contact via a text .... probably a bot ...still didn't answer the simplest of questions ...if only some cunt would pick up a fkin telephone nowadays😡😡😡

Ooops wrong thread 😕

[robinmasters]

On 12/24/2021 at 10:18 AM, cort16 said:

News just in Phil Mitchell tops Keven Webster by buying a Fiat 500C in a Tracksuit

That salesman has just had a really good idea. 

[MikeR]

15 hours ago, mitsisigma01 said:

Argos ...helpful human .. how the fk did you manage that .... Live chat is a bot ...fkin useless...no help on stock availability enquiry...no phone number for local store... Customer service human allegedly made contact via a text .... probably a bot ...still didn't answer the simplest of questions ...if only some cunt would pick up a fkin telephone nowadays😡😡😡

Ooops wrong thread 😕

it ( the bot )  didna understand me accent ..  and passed me on

[hairnet]

eyeyey or fahhhhkin ell mate

 

[Out Run]

They fookin robot dis nae ken!

[AnnoyingPentium]

One of my favourite eBay listings ever, still makes me chuckle.

[willswitchengage]

[gm]

today i am day off so filled the tank on the mx5………..

………and pissed it all away up in the hills 

excellent fun  

so glad i didn’t sorn it for the winter 

[Agila]

Just smelled my old best mate from the mid 90's.

Ok that needs further explanation, just out of shower, reached for a lynx can, it's only retro java I think I got for Christmas. My old mate Dave used to wear that back in the day.

Still smells shit though, it's no Africa 🤣

[Wack]

Let's just say my wife and I had a cooped up for too long domestic earlier this evening 

This just popped up on Facebook , what do they know that I don't 

[Wack]

Just been talking to a guy that owns a body shop 

One of his customers had an new RS6 , he'd been for PPE and paint correction but he was obsessed with it , decided he wanted an interim oil service so bough the correct oil and took it to one of the high st tyre service places 

They did the oil change , took it off the ramp , gave it back , he got about a mile and the dash lit up like a Christmas tree so he took it back , they got a guy in to scan it and it came up with a gearbox fault 

What numbnuts had done was removed the sump plug , drained the oil , refilled it and given it back , only he'd drained the gearbox oil and filled the engine up so it had double the oil in it 

There's a moral to this story but I'm sure you can work it out

[mitsisigma01]

You don't get thicker than a Kwik fit fitter ...

[AnnoyingPentium]

32 minutes ago, mitsisigma01 said:

You don't get thicker than a Kwik fit fitter ...

That's quite a tongue twister there. 😆

[Tenmil Socket]

18 hours ago, Agila said:

Just smelled my old best mate from the mid 90's.

Ok that needs further explanation, just out of shower, reached for a lynx can, it's only retro java I think I got for Christmas. My old mate Dave used to wear that back in the day.

Still smells shit though, it's no Africa 🤣

I can still remember the lovely smell of Lynx Oriental.

[Remspoor]

Today I shall be mainly eating Oliebolle with a few Appelflappe. The wife makes some mean ones. I am a fat git with a sweet tooth who will never say no to them!

Just will not be on the streets of Rotterdam.

https://www.rotterdamcentrum.nl/en/news/delicious-oliebollen-rotterdam

[Agila]

10 minutes ago, Tenmil Socket said:

I can still remember the lovely smell of Lynx Oriental.

Yeah. I used to use that. Back in the day you couldn't beat the success rate with Fahrenheit or Kouros.

Moved onto joop original late nineties. One squirt would make your house stink for a week. No idea what the hell was in that.

I had an amazing night with Miss Doncaster(yes that was such a thing) thanks to joop once. Worth every penny it cost in Boots 👍

[somewhatfoolish]

All of those smelt like teargas then and still do; why do people perpetrate such nasal atrocities upon everyone?

[wuvvum]

2 hours ago, Wack said:

Just been talking to a guy that owns a body shop 

One of his customers had an new RS6 , he'd been for PPE and paint correction but he was obsessed with it , decided he wanted an interim oil service so bough the correct oil and took it to one of the high st tyre service places 

They did the oil change , took it off the ramp , gave it back , he got about a mile and the dash lit up like a Christmas tree so he took it back , they got a guy in to scan it and it came up with a gearbox fault 

What numbnuts had done was removed the sump plug , drained the oil , refilled it and given it back , only he'd drained the gearbox oil and filled the engine up so it had double the oil in it 

There's a moral to this story but I'm sure you can work it out

Not the first time that kind of thing has happened.

https://www.audizine.com/forum/showthread.php/681930-Just-another-reason-not-to-take-your-S4-to-an-instant-oil-change-shop

[gm]

some years back i was watching a guy working on a very nice jag while i was having tyres fitted. i presume the jag was needing a ball joint or track rod end as the guy had the oxy acetylene torch out and was belting seven bells out of something. 

then it went very quiet. 

then the shouting started. 

then the customer saw the massive gouge in his wing from a misjudged swing of the lump hammer.

not sure how it ended as my tyres were done and i nicked off sharpish before things got too heated  

[Spurious]

What a pleasant way to end the year. Little jaunt up Black hill. Windy. But seen the sun set on the year is worth it. The Dark Peaks living up to their name..

 

[twosmoke300]

2022 biking season begins ! Trail riding in wales booked for March and Castle Coombe track day in April 😀

[anonymous user]

20 hours ago, Wack said:

Let's just say my wife and I had a cooped up for too long domestic earlier this evening 

This just popped up on Facebook , what do they know that I don't 

I get those fairly often. As even I don't like me, I think it's extremely unlikely to work.

[Wack]

3 hours ago, gm said:

some years back i was watching a guy working on a very nice jag while i was having tyres fitted. i presume the jag was needing a ball joint or track rod end as the guy had the oxy acetylene torch out and was belting seven bells out of something. 

then it went very quiet. 

then the shouting started. 

then the customer saw the massive gouge in his wing from a misjudged swing of the lump hammer.

not sure how it ended as my tyres were done and i nicked off sharpish before things got too heated  

I once misjudged the width of the pit when driving over it to get my exhaust changed , a mate worked there , I think I'd have been about 18 , drove over it without anyone watching me , because 18 , next second in it 

It was only an old Cortina , put a dent in the sill that went with the other dents 

The same guy a few weeks after drove a reliant robin over the pit instead of reversing it , that didn't go as well 

[Remspoor]

15 hours ago, somewhatfoolish said:

All of those smelt like teargas then and still do; why do people perpetrate such nasal atrocities upon everyone?

Better than smelling like a tramp or fishmonger.

[808 Estate]

[808 Estate]