What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[beko1987]

6 hours ago, 320touring said:

Present of the day from my brother - a service poster for the Oxford!

You could tick it off all year with a dry wipe as you perform the tasks, then wipe clean for next year! 

[Tadhg Tiogar]

14 hours ago, Wack said:

As I've got older I find my gas emissions have become more toxic , there is something quite rewarding in laying a silent but deadly carpet bomb in a public area and just walking on without showing any signs you've left it behind 

Farting is fun, and that's all there is to it.

[MikeR]

14 hours ago, busmansholiday said:

I love dropping one in a lift just as I leave, sound in the knowledge that the next occupants will have selected a high floor and the doors will have closed just as they enjoy my parting gift.

We used to do that on the early shift ... Drive in . Hold on till the lift .. Get in and drop them .....get out at our floor ...wait for the victim to walk throu the door ! 

[Tadhg Tiogar]

Currently in the bog, enjoying a massive post-Christm'arse dump

[Wack]

Maserati employs new team to stop plummeting sales

[hairnet]

got home after coupla days away

flicking thru tv to se if theres anything on that wasnt on last week (ie all the films)

campervan crisis is on together tv on freeview at 1330 till 2100

thatll do

all the biscuits all the tea

 

[hairymel]

 autoshite crackers...

[Tadhg Tiogar]

[Andyrew]

Shake shake shake, *drop* twang psssssssssssshhhbbhb

I can grin now. I was not grinning at the time

 

[myglaren]

Christmas present

 

 

[Tadhg Tiogar]

1 hour ago, myglaren said:

Christmas present

I read through that in one of those cut-price remainder bookshops the other day. Looks like a rehash of Crap Cars.

[NorfolkNWeigh]

3 minutes ago, Tadhg Tiogar said:

I read through that in one of those cut-price remainder bookshops the other day. Looks like a rehash of Crap Cars.

Who'da thunk it ?  Giles Chapman re-hashing some lame captions on photographs we've all seen a million times before ( mostly in his books for the last 20 years) then getting gullible relatives to buy for car loving Dads, Grandads, brothers, uncles etc, at Christmas. And of course we're all too polite to say anything , or are just glad to get anything car related, that he'll get away with it for the next 20 years.

[ChrisWilliams]

4 minutes ago, NorfolkNWeigh said:

Who'da thunk it ?  Giles Chapman re-hashing some lame captions on photographs we've all seen a million times before ( mostly in his books for the last 20 years) then getting gullible relatives to buy for car loving Dads, Grandads, brothers, uncles etc, at Christmas. And of course we're all too polite to say anything , or are just glad to get anything car related, that he'll get away with it for the next 20 years.

Peter Kay got away with that with his dvds for years. The same show as last year's, but in a different theatre, released a month before Christmas. 

[Tayne]

Just seen a DietCoke ad on tv and it looks like they’ve got a dating profile from someone on here.

 

 

Is that @eddyramrod

[MarvinsMom]

i dunno whats better, actually enjoying watching Paddington 2 on the telly,

or the look of utter disdain from Kerry after she asked "what engine is that?" and i replied that "60163... oh that's Tornado"

[xtriple]

I just heard of a car company that has recently set up a plant in China to make one specific model. All the cars have certain tolerences by design but apparently some have been 'pushed' a bit... to the extent that certain parts (namely headlights) from a UK built car will not fit the exact same car being built by the same company in a new factory in that there China.

[eddyramrod]

I'm watching Skyfall on +1, and the motorbike chase across the rooftops reminded me (yet again) of my 1986 Bond Moment.

I set off to a "do" in my tux, driving my Fiat 500 (JTD 241F) and broke a driveshaft.  Conveniently, just up the road from my sister's flat!  So I strolled down and borrowed... her Honda moped!  Riding up to one of the top hotels in Southport in full rig, on  a lovely summer evening, on a moped... it was a joy to walk into the room with helmet and gauntlets under my arm!

OK, so I wasn't chasing anyone, but you know.... it just felt right.

[Wack]

25 minutes ago, eddyramrod said:

I'm watching Skyfall on +1, and the motorbike chase across the rooftops reminded me (yet again) of my 1986 Bond Moment.

I set off to a "do" in my tux, driving my Fiat 500 (JTD 241F) and broke a driveshaft.  Conveniently, just up the road from my sister's flat!  So I strolled down and borrowed... her Honda moped!  Riding up to one of the top hotels in Southport in full rig, on  a lovely summer evening, on a moped... it was a joy to walk into the room with helmet and gauntlets under my arm!

OK, so I wasn't chasing anyone, but you know.... it just felt right.

Is there a video , that sounds great 

[DoctorRetro]

My littlun recorded a little 'news bulletin' on his Vtech watch, while trying to get to sleep on Xmas eve number 2 (He has Christmas day at his mum's, comes over to mine on boxing day and has a second Christmas on 27th) He's 7 by the way. 

 

[dozeydustman]

Had a few good festive gifts, nothing car related sadly.

At least this will allow me to do a bit of rammel spotting

 

on way home yesterday 

 

bargaibous! Freezer is well stocked now woth this and Xmas eve meat auction goodies.

back to work now. Not a harumph as I know what I’m doing today can be done by 10:30....

[beko1987]

1 hour ago, dozeydustman said:

Had a few good festive gifts, nothing car related sadly.

At least this will allow me to do a bit of rammel spotting

 

on way home yesterday 

 

bargaibous! Freezer is well stocked now woth this and Xmas eve meat auction goodies.

back to work now. Not a harumph as I know what I’m doing today can be done by 10:30....

I could do with going to tesco later, might have a mooch about. Co-op had nothing yesterday, town was dead though! 

[MorrisItalSLX]

It’s not too late to get yourself the ultimate accessory for your motor this Christmas.

https://www.unclothez.com/products/keeping-up-appearances-richard-hyacinth-bucket-car-auto-sun-shade/

[Rovorsche]

There may be interesting times in years to come, the quantity of flying space junk is set to double

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-50870117

To quote ESA " In general the amount of dedicated observation campaigns to study re-entry break-up events, be it via on-ground, on-orbit, or in-situ sensors, is surprisingly low given that on average an object with mass above one ton re-enters the Earth's atmosphere every two weeks. "

There are a number of impact trackers out there but ths is the first I found with a map
http://www.satview.org/spacejunk.php

What I find strange is the biggest contributor to the increase is Space-X Starlink, their products are also beginning to clutter the predicted re-entry list on spacejunk.

I dont understand their business model at all, putting things in orbit is expensive, are there really enough Mongolian Goatherders just waiting to sign up to Just Eat ?

Or is this just another layer of mobile phone tracking on a global scale ?

(Yes I have been catching up on The Grand Tour, and found it has improved with age)

Anyway, keep an eye on the trackers, the impact point isnt an exact science and most break up about 70 Km above ground and have fuel reserves to force a safe re-entry into the sea or a place nobody gives a crap about but with commercial pressures leading to cost cutting you never know if that very bright star you can see will be coming very close, very soon.

 

As its Christmas, Moonraker must be on somebodies TV today

Q: "My God, what does Bond think he is doing???! "
M: "I think he's attempting re-entry, sir "

 

 

 

 

[clayts450]

It's that time of year again for the 620.

Fuck me....

Martyn Lewis style keyboard bashing. Hmmm...

Phone call to Tesco, 5 mins on the phone.

Thank you please.

[Rovorsche]

Tesco Insurance are CUNTS!

My Mother In Law stayed with them for Ten years, and was paying £650 for a 1.4 seat, the yearly increments were excessive but affordable to her.

Switched to RAC for £280 including breakdown cover and hasnt looked back.

[clayts450]

Thing is, every year it's the same for the Streetwise and the 620 - Tesco always come in cheapest on the comparison sites (not the other fleet members, bizarrely), you ring them up, give them the quote number and they match without quibble.

The lassie I spoke with today was genuinely gobsmacked at my 62% saving !

They just rely on people not taking a few minutes to hit Confused etc

[Rovorsche]

That was the final straw, I gave her the price from Confused.com and she called them back to challenge the renewal value, Tesco would only offer a £50 reduction as their best online price was for new customers only.

Perhaps some layer of middle managers with agressive targets has been Re-deployed.
I have even ignored their quotes on comparison sites, an additional £3.00 for anyone but Tesco seemed attractive to me.

[Fumbler]

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/IGBT-ARC-20-200Amp-Stick-Welder-DC-Inverter-MMA-Welding-Machine-Mask-Cable-Kits/401985213054?_trkparms=aid%3D111001%26algo%3DREC.SEED%26ao%3D1%26asc%3D20160908105057%26meid%3D50d2152842864c8290c1e470fd6516f4%26pid%3D100675%26rk%3D1%26rkt%3D15%26mehot%3Dpp%26sd%3D401985213054%26itm%3D401985213054%26pmt%3D1%26noa%3D1%26pg%3D2380057&_trksid=p2380057.c100675.m4236&_trkparms=pageci%3Ab06693e3-28b7-11ea-884e-74dbd1803f10|parentrq%3A47d2dd0e16f0aad70163b82dff9b4514|iid%3A1

200 amps. Ha ha ha haaaaa......
Might be complete dogshit but after doing some research and stuff, I've decided that it's so cheap I might just buy one of these death toasters, make it electrically safe and actually make good on my New Year resolutions!

[HillmanImp]

Was in TK Maxx buying some unfashionable and unflattering jeans and saw this BMW next to the tills. 

Well, its German so they're not miles away. 

[beko1987]

Home from work at 2 today, so grabbed half an hour with a vacuum and gave the ZX a muck out! No pics because I was just very into it. 

Do need to carry on with the interior cleaning though... Feel a drill brush and a cheap drill is a good thing to buy next year. 

Did enquire about a new interior for it, and found one but the rear seats were different. Do the sliding rear bench seats bolt up as the fixed/folding rear seats do on mine? 

Was a well nice L reg brown cloth interior too, from a breaker up in Worcester if anyone wants details, he still has the car I think (it's white)