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Everything posted by hairymel

  1. In my experience the topmount on these winds up past where the spring is compressed so no fear of spring of death through your head.
  2. Is the little 8 pin chip on the back of the board assploded ? Looks like it might be damaged in your pic
  3. Shitty Xmas present that. Straight pipe.
  4. Not strippers. Ocado/sister delivered tobacco , much fine whiskey, coke-nohookers and cupcakes. Bit gobsmacked as I have already charged whiskey tax for the job Christmas is unruined 😎
  5. Do not like Unfriend request I hope not. I have a hefty hangover this morning and the thought of doing a brake service fills me with vomit. Oil and filters no worries though😉
  6. Transit guilt trip payment update : brother in law has paid the parts and whiskey bill and tried to add an extra tenner which was refused. sister has asked if I am in at 7 tommorrow night for a 'delivery' I'm hoping for strippers *wire type obviously *not obviously but still hoping😊
  7. Guess you have already found out that generally these type of Chinesium 200a inverters are not bad for the money as long as you factor in that the display shows about twice the actual current. And of course the 200a rating is nearer 100a.
  8. Warranty? You are joking right? As long as it moves out of the spot my voyager normally parks on I don't give a shit. *possibly warranty until it goes to Portugal, I love my sister and I am a mug.
  9. Sisters poxy rotten transit update: 50 mile round trip to collect a new starter motor this morning. Would have been the afternoon if the ecp guy hadnt phoned ,and woke me up, to tell me they shut at 6pm instead of 8. Bit of a struggle to fit the new starter until I got to the ignition feed to the starter. Last connection and the ring terminal fell off before I even touched it. Trip to my buddy to borrow a box full of useful conectors. Pretty shoddy repair but it was the best I could do due to access issues. Then the poxy top bolt on the starter wouldn't go in. 1 1/2 hours into darkness relying on my phone balancing on my forehead and I'm done. In more ways than one! Giving my sister 2 bills One at realistic garage rates and one with just parts and a £43 bottle of whiskey. Wonder which one she will want to pay😀 Ps van starts and runs obvs
  10. Cheers @Skizzer Sadly I expect karma will just bring me more aggro. On the other hand I usually find Xmas family gatherings to be more emotionally draining than transit fettling. And one for the grin thread : I managed to pull my own name out of the hat for family secret santa and, just for once, I got a decent present. 'My' santa massively overspent as well because I/he is such a nice guy😀 A bottle of Makers mark 46 and a six pack of walnut topped whips. I deserve it because I am special* 😂
  11. Although it seems most people only want advice that justifies their already held viewpoint, I still try. I would have posted in the grumpy thread if I had reached my 'go fcuk yourself' limit. They both have been there for me when I have been drowning in my own fuck ups, so it seems reasonable to help out in return. On the flip side when brother in laws sister arrived to ferry them to their next family gathering this afternoon, I stood by watching the chaos as it was realised she had a flat tyre. After 15 munutes I had to take over though because idiots. Then it started raining..... Im still a bit soggy Good cheer to all men and all that other seasonal shit 😉
  12. Starter was surprisingly clean inside. Not sure what the issue is but the starter was not engaging with the flywheel. I did spend a lot of time running through the 'told you so' conversation. If the gearbox needs to come off I will probably tell them find an alternative mug. Probably
  13. My sister and partner are moving to Portugal on the new year. They wanted a van to move there with. They saw a transit on gumtree they liked and asked my advice. I pointed out it was massively overpriced had spent 2 years sitting after a huge mot fail on rot, had had another fail the year after again for rot and the last 2 owners had only had it for 4 months each before punting it on. I searched the ebay for something better near them. Half the milage half the price and twice as nice looking. Apparently it was 'too cheap and probably broken' so they didn't even go look at it. They then go ahead and buy the rotten Shitter. Because the lady selling it 'knew nothing about cars but was very nice.' Fast forward to Xmas eve and on route to our family gathering they broke down. The transit and occupants were then deposited off a flatbed outside my parents house, 8 hours later at 6 am. Guess who spent their afternoon under a transit while everyone else was shovelling dinner down their throats.... Top bolt on the starter was fcuked and no access, so I had to chisel a hole in the transmission tunnel to remove it. New starter ordered to collect Friday and hopefully the dmf and ringgear are ok. Took over 2 hours to get it of so no way am I trying to repair the starter I took off. Merry xmas🙄
  14. Afaik the mini uses similar hardware /software to a 1 series bmw. Some obd codes bring up the service light. Perhaps you need to fix some of the broken stuff as well as giving it oil 😛
  15. Never used a hole saw but back seat base out and application of aviation snips enables replacement of the fuel pump from above. YouTube videos are available
  16. I have been ignoring a small split on my voyager exhaust for 3 and a half months. It's been very noisey for the last 3 months In a act of extreme exertion I have dragged my arse out of bed before 11am and popped to work to have a look. It's split and rusted out over half way round the middle box. So up on the 'portable lift' and a quick buzz with the welder. Hopefully it will at least last to mot time
  17. Smoll update on my previous posts on my mates 1 series bmw. Apparently I am now his diagnostic first line. So far i have struggled through inoperative electronic steering lock, radio recoding , immobiliser reprogramming and several other stupid computer related issues. It's come back with airbag/seat belt light on On closer inspection it appears to have an intermittent fault in the explosive disconnect on the battery positive terminal. What the actual fuck is that was my first response. Not come across one before but apparently it's a thing. I cleared the code as mot is due and left him to reset the connectors to see if it comes back. I was also asked to reset the service light as he has done engine and brake service. That went as well as expected. There are 5 or six items on the conditional service list that need resetting. All fine except the front brakes. On reset they showed 255% and then threw a code for implausible data which would not clear. Further research shows this is another 'common' issue when new wear sensors are not fitted. Old one was fine apparently. At 7pm at night the fix was to disconnect the loom to the sensor, jumper the two feed wires and then perform the reset. Replugged the sensor and currently all lights are off. All through this procedure my buddy was telling me that what I was doing was wrong and couldn't possibly work. This really sets off my autism. I can't deal with people who ask me to do stuff for them and then tell me what/how to do the thing they getting me to do. After that I went to my dads to look at some garden tools. He seems to pay a 'gardener' to come round and break stuff. Chainsaw and chainsaw on a pole both with jammed/fallen off chains. I was presented with a box full of bits as my dad 'had had a look at them' The bar on one apparently was bent but he had staightened it already, reassembly was halted by the chainbrake not fitting back on. I sorted that, all the while being told I was doing it wrong. The chainsaw on a pole after much pissing about seems to have an issue with the teeth meshing in the gearbox. I think either the gearshaft or bearing cover is bent enough to jam the teeth. Cue 45 minutes googling the poxy home shopping channel 'multitool' and I have ordered a whole new generic gearbox from China. £14 and i don't have to worry about putting back together for a month Tldr: bmws are unreliable and have too many electronics, people are annoying and gardeners are more so.
  18. Always a good thing to have an excuse to buy inexpensive tools😉
  19. Think you only need to find a way to cut off fuel flow between the pump and after the pressure reg. Dunno about vulvas but most ford's you can use a bit of 8mm copper microbore and a bit of fuel hose to bridge the quick connects. ie female connector has a bit of microbore shoved in it then a bit of fuel hose that pushes onto the male connector. Plus a couple of jubilee clips. Do that before the fuel rail and after the reg then power up. Crimp the pump side hose and you rule out the pump back feeding Crimp the return and power off and you at least narrow it to reg and injectors
  20. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=DL8toqPcXKA Diagnostic procedure from south main auto.
  21. In my experience that proverb does not compute if you are the poor sod who has the problem shared* with😂
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