The grumpy thread

[SRi05]

4 minutes ago, outlaw118 said:

Just did a bit of painting in the "spare" bedroom, had some paint flake off due to OMGDAMP, sorted that, primed the wall with damp seal Monday, topcoat today.

Just rollered the whole wall, didn't splash a drop, no spillages, all good, and doesn't look too bad.

Put roller, tray and brush on kitchen worktop while I went for a fag.

Cue the House Tiger jumping ip onto said worktop, directly into the paint tray, then jumping out again and running round the kitchen flicking his feet about.

YOU FUCKING FURRY TWAT.

I've always maintained that cats are arseholes

[outlaw118]

Quote

4 minutes ago, SRi05 said:

I've always maintained that cats are arseholes

 

Yep, but dogs aren't much better. At least my brother's old Great Dane never* stole a cooked chicken off the worktop and stole cheese from the 'fridge....

[Bren]

Forgot to pay my merseyflow. Again.

I is a bellend.

[Supernaut]

1 hour ago, SRi05 said:

I've always maintained that cats are arseholes

There are 3 permanent interchangeable states with cats.

1 - you're so graceful, my house panther

2 - you're my fuzzy little bundle of cuteness

3 - STOP EATING PLASTIC YOU STUPID FURRY LITTLE BASTARD

[HillmanImp]

Ordered some front wing bottom repair panels for the Porsche the other day. 

Here are the photos from the website:

 

 

Here is what I received:

Not what I normally get but okay I guess.........bit scratched up, was the metal they used rusty or something?

Oh, this bit on the outside isn't flush. It will need filling/grinding back on both sides:

Lets look on the inside. Fucking hell.

Who did the fucking welding your Dog? 

Look, there's actually holes I can see through!

I mean I can sort these out in an hour or so by attacking them with a welder myself but do you know how much these fucking things cost?

Take a guess?

No, more

No, more, 

No, still more.

It was £108 plus postage.

£108 plus postage.

EACH!!!!!

Am I fuck sorting these out myself. If they were £25 each I'd just suck it up but FFS.

 

I'm not being mental here am I? These are absolute shit aren't they? 

I ordered some of these for the Triumph a while back for £29.50 on Ebay and they were spot on.

 

All other repair panels I've ever ordered for my Imps, Triumphs and the Lancia have been very professional looking. 

Also, I would've thought they'd be painted to stop moisture getting in the metal or am I going OTT there?

Someone at work pointed out I could get oven trays from Asda for £1.99 and asked why I'd spent so much on these ones. They've got a point.

Can someone confirm that these are indeed fucking WANK. They are so bad I'm concerned that I might have just been really lucky before and this is what you normally get. 

[Tadhg Tiogar]

14 hours ago, FakeConcern said:

In Tesco trying to decide which wishdosher tablets to get, I usually look at the label that tells you how much per tablet, however...

Packet 1 is £8.16 perkg...

Packet 2 is 22.8p per tablet...

and packet 3 is £1.03 per 100g...

You couldn't make it up...

 

Maybe this should have gone in the funny thread...

 

14 hours ago, High Jetter said:

Forward this to Which magazine, they're trying to stamp this out

Yes, this is quite a common tactic to make mental arithmetic difficult. 

[beko1987]

1 hour ago, HillmanImp said:

Well thought out 8/10 rant

£108 plus postage.

EACH!!!!!

 indeed fucking WANK.

Their shit m8, and I'm not a welding person, as you know. If a mate had knocked them out for you as a favour for a pack of beer I'd say their pretty good, but someone flogging those as if their amazing needs to be stamped on

[Kiltox]

I don’t remember making repair panels whilst drunk but if I did that’s what they’d probably look like 

Never used a welder in my life 

[Pieman]

5 hours ago, outlaw118 said:

Just did a bit of painting in the "spare" bedroom, had some paint flake off due to OMGDAMP, sorted that, primed the wall with damp seal Monday, topcoat today.

Just rollered the whole wall, didn't splash a drop, no spillages, all good, and doesn't look too bad.

Put roller, tray and brush on kitchen worktop while I went for a fag.

Cue the House Tiger jumping ip onto said worktop, directly into the paint tray, then jumping out again and running round the kitchen flicking his feet about.

YOU FUCKING FURRY TWAT.

It'll have done it on purpose and then gone and sat somewhere out of reach while quietly laughing at you.  Cats exist solely to piss humans off, yet know they can get away with it because we wuv them so much.  Well not me, I can't stand the things.

[Burnside]

Since having the headgasket replaced at a garage on my Punto last November. There been on going issues. First off the garage informed me, that the gearbox mount was fucked and the flexi was blowing upon collection. Which puzzled me, as surely it would have made more sense to ask me if I wanted to get them changed before collecting it.

Anyway they said it would be ok for now if I drove 'steady', so que terrible knocking every time I pulled away and the Ferrari like appetite for fuel. 

It went back after Xmas to get these problems fixed. So had them replace the flexi and gearbox mount. But I'd also noticed inbetween bringing it back that the Punto was loosing coolant from somewhere, and the Gauge dropped to 0 expect when it's left ticking over stationary. I suspect they haven't fitted a new thermostat when they did the Headgasket, even though they said they did. As from inspecting the casing it look's old and weathered. 

But after picking it up last weekend they could find nothing to explain the problem. So I decided to fit a new coolant temp sensor first. An if that doesn't solve it I'll fit a new thermostat myself. 

Meanwhile there been this strange intermittent vibrating noise since I had it back, suspecting it might be exhaust related. I decided to have a route around the car after fitting the new sensor.

Didn't take me a second to see the problem. When they supposedly replaced the midsection of the exhaust as it's part of flexi. The rubber hanger at the front is attached to the mount, expect the mount not attached to the car! 

Bloody bolt missing and the mount hanging about 2 inches from the ground. Oh and the exhaust is still bloody blowing and it's drinking fuel like Oliver Reed. 

An this is the best part about the hole saga, the person ment to be a Punto Specialist. 

Oh yer, your special alright. 

 

[High Jetter]

Mrs J informed me she had need* need of a new pair of black shoes to attend one funeral this week, and one next. I dutifully ordered the selected £45 pair, which arrived in time but had a scuff on one toe which didn't seem likely to polish out, so returned. As a replacement wouldn't arrive in time for funeral No. 1, a trip to town ensued where a 'feels like I'm walking on air' pair was sourced for a bargain* £75. Their comfort was re-enthused over the following day, and they were duly worn on Wednesday. I wonder if you can guess who's fault it is that one foot hurt all day yesterday and again today?

[inconsistant]

5 hours ago, beko1987 said:

Their shit m8, and I'm not a welding person, as you know. If a mate had knocked them out for you as a favour for a pack of beer I'd say their pretty good, but someone flogging those as if their amazing needs to be stamped on

Yeah, this. Im shit and a beginner at welding and even I know thats bad, bad welding, even for tack welding.  If a mate made these for free I’d appear grateful and bin them. They’re worth less than the cost of the metal they’re made from.

[HillmanImp]

46 minutes ago, inconsistant said:

Yeah, this. Im shit and a beginner at welding and even I know thats bad, bad welding, even for tack welding.  If a mate made these for free I’d appear grateful and bin them. They’re worth less than the cost of the metal they’re made from.

Yeah, I'm fuming. They'll be going back. 

I ended up going out of the orifice to calm down as was so pissed off. I rarely smoke now unless I'm pissed so ate 4 Cadbury twirls instead. 

[Ohdearme]

Been doing the washing up and tidying kitchen. 

Took wedding ring off to wash up. All tidied and saw bottle top I’d missed.

chicked it in recycling, two items chinked and clonked to bottom of bin.

Guess who also picked fucking ring up without thinking...

Bin diving. Ace.

at least missus in bed so she can’t see me sorting it out in new kitchen, Rick doing it outside, it’s cold and dark!

 

 

[Mr_Bo11ox]

Those repair patches are mega wank arent they. They could at least get the friggin things sandblasted for gods sake. If only to stop them looking like something made by that 'scmick' dude off Retro Rides (other shite welders are available)

[M'coli]

Someone's coming the cunt if they're selling hand-made panel patches for that price that are worse than you could knock up yourself! Get them telt, they're taking the piss.

[captain_70s]

Fuck, those panels are shit.

I thought this Econoline van panel I saw on YouTube the other day was bad...

[jon928se]

Not sure if this is a grump or a grin.

Being Burns night I was scouting around for a recipe for a whisky sauce to have with Haggis and Tatties (can't get Neeps this time of year in Aus) and found one on Gransnet. Heard of Mumsnet but not Gransnet. Guess what I have been doing for the last hour. Does this mean I is old?

[High Jetter]

'Gransnet' just sounds so wrong, on many levels.

[yes oui si]

16 minutes ago, High Jetter said:

'Gransnet' just sounds so wrong, on many levels.

Don't knock a gilf 'til you've tried one. 

 

[yes oui si]

This morning, I'm mostly pissed at people who try to correct the writings of others in an attempt to make themselves appear intelligent. 

"Actually, it's 'Octopi'..." 

Actually, it's a Greek root, not a Latin one, so the plural of Octopus is Octopodes, but it is also a loan word, so it is perfectly acceptable and correct to JUST CALL THEM FUCKING OCTOPUSES. 

Anyone pluralising something which isn't a Latin root ending in 'ius' with 'i' or increasingly with 'ii' needs a bolt through the forehead. 

[DeeJay]

11 hours ago, captain_70s said:

Fuck, those panels are shit.

I thought this Econoline van panel I saw on YouTube the other day was bad...

 

Mustie 1. He would've made a better stab at them himself.

[MarvinsMom]

2 hours ago, yes oui si said:

Don't knock a gilf 'til you've tried one. 

 

a friend of mine did his degree in aberdeen, and a couple of us went up for a couple of days which included him showing us the highlights* of the town on a night.

we ended up in this dive nightclub. for the life of me i cannot remember its name, but i DO remember seeing Martin disappear off out back with this old biddy.

she had been and given ihm what was in his own words "the BEST blowjob of my life!" 

though he also said that watching her put her teeth back in afterwards was "very disturbing"

[MarvinsMom]

oh and my grump?

i feel like shit. kerry too feels like shit.

the reason for us both feeling like shit? no its not that new chinese super flu thing, but the fact that both of us, have managed to get perhaps 4 hours sleep again. 

yes, the third night running, neither of us could get settled down and have a good night kip.

the reason? well i'm fretting about this job in leeds that i have been offered, and kerry too is anxious, cos i am anxious, about this fuckin' job in leeds, the one i have not even accepted yet. but are awake all fucking night worrying about.

this all started, funnily enough when i got told that i had been offered this job in leeds.

i think that is my subconscious telling me that this new job, might not be "the one" for me.....

 

[Bren]

Apparently it 6 degrees here. But I have inflated tyres on both cars and it is cold enough to make my ears ache.

[yes oui si]

29 minutes ago, MarvinsMom said:

a friend of mine did his degree in aberdeen, and a couple of us went up for a couple of days which included him showing us the highlights* of the town on a night.

we ended up in this dive nightclub. for the life of me i cannot remember its name, but i DO remember seeing Martin disappear off out back with this old biddy.

she had been and given ihm what was in his own words "the BEST blowjob of my life!" 

though he also said that watching her put her teeth back in afterwards was "very disturbing"

As my mate from Paisley says, "Wallies oot, willy in..." 

[Lord Sterling]

On 1/23/2020 at 12:51 PM, Lord Sterling said:

Finding a job is a fucking bastard these days.

My current job is due to end tomorrow. Despite applying for a similar non-customer service position with similar pay I didn't get it because they didn't feel I was "the right person for job". I am once again looking at oblivion, as per fucking usual.

Boss at my last job is being an arsehole refusing to provide me with a reference for an possible new job starting on Monday despite being asked 5 times by my current agency. I fancy just turning up and smacking him one, but of course, as everyone says, 'it won't solve anything' maybe not, but it'll bloody make me feel great and him like the arsehole he is. The evil Lord Sterling is starting to be real.

Not sure how long I can weather this arsehole of not having a permanent job/struggling/financial issues etc.... Someone is gonna hurt real soon.

So as correctly predicted, on Monday, I am facing the dole queue again.

Also, I noticed someone robbed the aerial off the Vectra. New one is on order and the threads will get some loctite before it goes back on.

[Craig the Princess]

8 minutes ago, Lord Sterling said:

So as correctly predicted, on Monday, I am facing the dole queue again.

Did you see the railway jobs link on the railshite thread? If you are still near (within an hour of) Birmingham that could be worth an apply.

[Craig the Princess]

Fucking people who park their short arsed car at the far end of a car park space so it looks like there is a space until you get right up to it.

[Lord Sterling]

Just now, Craig the Princess said:

Did you see the railway jobs link on the railshite thread? If you are still near (within an hour of) Birmingham that could be worth an apply.

Cheers man. I'll take a look.