The grumpy thread

[yes oui si]

What would actually happen if you didn't pay him now but waited until the end of April as agreed?  Would he send the lads round with baseball bats, or would he just whinge a bit?  If the latter, why not just tell him that to pay him early would cause you major issues so you'll pay when you agreed to pay.

He's hinted at the former, but the last lot who tried that went out of business shortly after due to completely unrelated circumstances.

[gm]

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and guess who left his wallet at home !

 

fuck fuck fuckity fuck !

 

and I'm due at work at 2pm

 

 

 

right then, my 'Frank Spencer' of a day :

 

driving home from work last night, the low fuel warning made itself know - no problem, I'll stop at the supermarket and fill up. except its not 24 hours anymore. no problem, I'll go on my way to work tomorrow.

set off for work today, got to Sainsbury's, went to pay at pump and discovered no wallet - fuck.

time check - 20 mins until I'm due in, no time to go home for wallet, lets keep going and hope for the best

time check - 10 mins before work, outside lane of the redheugh bridge crossing into Newcastle and putt putt putt, no fuck no not here you bastard little car

I coasted up on the the central reservation thus

 

 

and banged the hazard lights on. 

right, phone work, explain to the new boss who I've worked for for less than a week what has happened and that I'm going to be late - not impressed

check the boot - ya fuckin' beauty - a jerry can - all I need to do is get to petrol station

 

 

except you've still got no wallet, you twat.

 

right, phone my sister..........hello, this is the voice mail for aaaaaaarghh !!

right, phone my mam..........hello, this is the voice mail foraaaaaaargh !!!!!! for fuck sake !

right, phone the land line - success - mam, no time to explain, can you get in the car and come to Newcastle quickly, bring your purse 

 

I started walking back over the bridge towards the petrol station and a friendly taxi driver pulled in and offered me a lift. what a hero, I explained my predicament and he even offered to buy me a can of fuel - lovely guy, thankyou so much mr taxi.

 

mam and sister turned up at the garage, I filled my little green can up and we got back to the little red shite bag 107

 

the eagle eyed amongst you may have spotted the next little snag in the plan

 

 

yes, thats a handy wee green can but WHERE IS THE FUCKING SPOUT ?

 

my best guess is at knockhill, or maybe in the back of Domes Audi ? fuck knows, but it wasn't where I most needed it today 

 

I splashed about 2/3rds of the Pez in and got going with scant regard for Newcastles seemingly infinite supply of bus lanes, work was achieved a mere 30 minutes late. 

 

explaining my tale of incompetence to my colleagues, one who had started the same time that I was due in was particularly impressed - "I wondered what idiot had parked up in the middle of the bridge !" - at least they know I wasn't bullshitting them

 

I stopped at the same garage on the way home and brimmed the tank.

 

and purchased a couple of very useful items

 

 

what a fucking day !

[Sheefag]

Broke terms of (admittedly verbal) contract and demanded payment early because he's short of cash.

 

What were the terms of the contract and did he demand payment before he finished the job?

[Cavcraft]

Hey, GM, if you're stuck for a spout in the future then (an empty) one of these...

 

 

 

...works. Scissors/screwdriver/car keys to roughly cut the bottom off and a steady hand when pouring usually works.

[Tamworthbay]

Even a dominos menu will work if you twist it into a cone, they leak a bit but 95% goes in. Don’t ask me how I know.

[purplebargeken]

I used a handy traffic cone once on my Daf 33 when no petrol can spout happened. Worked a treat.. 

[Saabnut]

Todays Grump

 

I have a 150 mile round trip to do in the Saab Convertible which cannot be postponed.

 

This is the view out of my window this morning. Thank goodness Saabs have good heaters!

[louiepj]

Note to self stop buying bloody Wellseal..

[bangernomics]

Todays Grump

 

I have a 150 mile round trip to do in the Saab Convertible which cannot be postponed.

 

This is the view out of my window this morning. Thank goodness Saabs have good heaters!

What a great view.

[yes oui si]

What were the terms of the contract and did he demand payment before he finished the job?

Work to be completed as and when he could (between jobs), but before the end of April. £500 up front, balance at the end of April.

 

He's now said that he delayed another job and did mine instead so he could get paid earlier ("I really need the cash, mate.").

 

He's fucked himself and will be getting no more work from this end - I'll pay for a trusted person to travel down from Berwick in the future.

[Tamworthbay]

Corners, simple yes? Apparently not. I thought even the knuckle dragging three fingered Neanderthal relatives (or residents of Norfolk as they are also known) know that you do not brake mid corner, not even gently, if you are going too fast for a corner (they werent) braking will not help. And I thought the fact that you brake BEFORE a corner and gently accelerate THROUGH the corner was also common knowledge. Apparently not to mr sky blue metallic 320 notfloppy top who decided to brake mid corner on the massive run up to the A38 and then looked amazed as an old Volvo defied the laws of science and went around him. Driving standards are really slipping as every day I see crap driving like this.

[Richard]

My wife was out this afternoon so the radio was switched off well in advance of 1pm, result.

 

Or so I thought. Now the shitpump is spewing out something that has not only Elaine bastard Paige but also John FUCKING Barrowman.

[GrumpiusMaximus]

I suggest playing the Conet Project on a nearby rival system.  Particularly the data CD.

[anonymous user]

This is why god invented cds, or silence.

[Richard]

Unfortunately she's setting up a new laptop (and not even watching the shitpump) and I'm expected to answer questions or the headphones would have been well and truly on.

[Richard]

Christ, there's judges as well.

[castros_bro]

Last week booked Ibiza FR in for MOT as it hasn;t been used for months and got a job starting Monday so need transport.  Arrived at garage surrounded by chaos as but DVLA system was offline so garage not able to do any MOTs, FR batt light then came on, drove back in day light, steering light came on and steering go a bit heavy, did Charles Atlas parking manoeuvres, turned off engine and now FR is dead. Never-mind - there;s always another car somewhere  nearby.

[MikeR]

I suppose it saves putting a seat belt around the plant ......

 

 

 

[dozeydustman]

I've had 2 weeks of tidying up both my new and my old home, living out of boxes, replacing the cam belt on the Toyota, injuring my shoulder, shampooing carpets (Beko - I have a Vax Rapide Plus, autographed photo available on request) and having hands that smell like various household cleaning agents, I am absolutely shattered.

 

So the Saab decides now is the time to have grindy brakes. Pah!

 

EDIT - It's a Vax Rapid Ultra Mr Beko

[HillmanImp]

GT6 has a seized rear drum still. Can't free it off at all. Decided to just get the car running today as its on a drive wheel but just as I was getting ready to go out the neighbours came round and pointed out the fence had come down in the back garden so spent the day sorting that out FFS. A right pain I could do without.

[Cavcraft]

Don't really know what you're moaning about, tbh.

I was advised to say 'No comment' all the way through my police interview.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Never got the job.

[mercrocker]

Likewise I kept quiet about my embarrassing police record during my civil service interview.  (It was only a small matter and happened when I was still in my teens).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wasn't even sure the bloke had even heard "Roxanne" anyway.

[anonymous user]

I brought the Land Rover home this morning. It hates me, it is now as bad, if not worse than before. It really isn't running right it is damp and horrible inside as the window has been left open and to cap it all I snapped the mirror off reversing onto the drive. I was concentrating so much on not colliding with the holly bush on the left that the driver's mirror caught on the rainwater downpipe. The downpipe is cast iron so that won.

I've had enough of it now and refuse to spend any more money on it so will have to take a bigger hit on it to sell it with a dodgy engine.

[Cavcraft]

Just picked my scooter up from being serviced. 'We clean and polish them as part of the service and we have fixed your horn'.

 

It's filthy dirty, 3/4 of the fuel seems to have disappeared and the horn still doesn't work.

[Tenmil Socket]

Hey, GM, if you're stuck for a spout in the future then (an empty) one of these...

 

 

 

...works. Scissors/screwdriver/car keys to roughly cut the bottom off and a steady hand when pouring usually works.

 

Yep, had to do this myself not so long ago whilst nursing a petrol light on the dash... although in the end, after all the faffing, I hadn't actually run out of petrol, it was a dodgy wire to the ECU. 

[Tenmil Socket]

The local Morrisons jet-wash. There's either no shampoo in the thing or when there is, that much comes out, you struggle to get it all off in the remaining time...

[SiC]

More of a sad thing than a grump. But got new contract signed at new place and handed my notice in today at my current employer.

 

Great team and a good employer. Really interesting tech too. Will certainly miss some of my colleagues. Genuinely feel quite sad.

[busmansholiday]

This weather. How the fuck am I going to get the recently purchased TF sorted when it keeps pissing it down. I might have a garage, but the MGB GT is in there still winking at the MiG welder and the MGB Roadster is in front of the garage.

Saying that, since I taxed it on March 1st, I've only been out in it twice, and it pissed it down on one of those days.

Bastard weather...

[catsinthewelder]

The weather just hates me at the moment,  I washed up on Sunday looking out the window at the sunshine then went outside to fix the car and a blizzard appeared out of nowhere.  Today the weather appeared to be lovely until I ventured outside with a basket of laundry.  Fucked it into the dryer and the sun came out.

[gm]

FOUR MILLION VIEWS !

 

 

WHAT A BUNCH OF GRUMPY TWATS