The grumpy thread

[anonymous user]

The real idiot wouldn't have waited for the angle grinder to stop spinning and would be taking their severed fingers to hospital in a bag of frozen peas. I know someone who did this but with a bandsaw, trying to reach past it while it was going, same person managed to build his hearing aid into the garden wall (took it out when he was working and put it on the wall that he was constructing and laid a bed of stone over it) and another time his top set if teeth fell in the cesspool  (he'd put them in his shirt pocket so that he wouldn't lose them and they fell out of his pocket into the tank when he was trying to replace the cover)

[The Moog]

Blisters don't sound so bad!

[beko1987]

The best way to get blisters on your whole hand is to grab the exhaust as it comes out of the manifold to give it a good squeeze thinking it's a radiator hose. 

Takes a special kind of stupid to do that... 

Which is what I did recently

[Cavcraft]

Whoever said cod liver oil is good for joints is badly mistaken. I’ve just smoked one and it was disgusting.

[chaseracer]

There is a special place in COMEDY HELL being prepared for him right now... ?

[New POD]

12 hours ago, Lankytim said:

Rot hole on the drivers side strut top on my 2002 V70. There’s a bit of rust underneath too. Probably not worth repairing seeing as it’s a high mileage clunker. A real pity as I was full on fixorating it to make a reasonably mint daily driver.

Also..

In a well known charity shop today looking at old maps and books (one of each I bought) First of all the elderly female assistant pretended to look at books while she kept her eye on me in a pretty obvious way. She wandered off and was replaced by a younger assistant who did exactly the same. When I went to pay the cashier spoke to the young assistant, nodded in my direction and asked if “everything was ok with him” (btw, I can still hear you if you try not to move your lips like some sort of ventriloquist act)

Do I look like some smack head looking for my next hit? Am I going to steal a Mills and Boon novel and sell it on the black market to fund my habit?

Launceston. IMHO an odd town full of odd people.


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I would have gone back in and ask if they need any volunteers.  Tell them you are a paricularly good shop undercover security guard. And you would be happy to run a Security and safety course for all the staff. Because the way they followed you around the shop in such an obvious manner is likely to result in violence from a real smackhead. 

Put on your best Eton schoolboy accent, and be as condescending as you dare.

 

[Floatylight]

How'd you handle it? Looking forward to some time away, get home and missis gets a call from the school. Stepson 1 has offered a tictac to another pupil. Only it's an ibuprofen. I have my views believe me, but this kid is pushing some boundries recently, like for the last two years. We've done the talks, saw things from his perspective, tried to understand... And then this stunt. Step parenting is hard. If he was my kid I'd be winning the super champion arse kicking competition in approximately 20 minutes but I have to back seat it and support the missis. The thing is, he's a good, loving kid but goes out of his way to fuck his 14 year old life up. His old man is a useless twat as well, living some faux gangster lifestyle abroad, never financially supporting the kids he has. Now, he is a cunt. There's something in that I reckon and it's making stepson 1 be like this...even though he knows what his old man is like. I just can't figure out what. Step son 2 is a pure football and maths genius. Maybe some jealousy there eh? I'm out of ideas.

We've had similar with our youngest, 16 on Sunday, technically my stepson but always treated as my own. He's struggled academically, is Dyslexic and the school have just asked us to get him tested for ADHD.

He's a crowd pleaser, started talking all gansta yo! Which drives me crazy, he's got his internal issues he's struggling with and spends loads of time alone in his room.

Most of the time he just grunts at me but there are a few things which I've found that work, mainly around spending time just the two of us doing things he enjoys, the main one is playing pool & snooker, we've joined a club and go a couple of times a month, when playing he's like a changed person, cool, calm and focussed, still a showoff but hey it's all good fun.

We've had many calls and talks with the school, the truth of it is for the last couple of years he's just wanted out of there and wants to get on with his life, we've taken the decision really that for his mental health that whatever will be will be with his exams, he's focussed on maths and English and will get an apprenticeship.

So, my advice fwiw is to cut him some slack, find something the two of you can do that he's passionate about and do on as equals and try and understand what the real reason behind behaviour is..



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[chaseracer]

He's always been a good kid at heart, Steve - both of them are.  That won't change.

[MikeR]

things that are missing because it was given to you to put away ......  yeah right not ...

turned the house upside down last night looking for a missing passport , which WAS 100 PER CENT GIVEN TO ME TO PUT AWAY in the safe drawer ...  could/did   not find it last night

and I was again cast into the endless  pit of despair and reminded how important it was to put things away ...

had a crap night with my cold , all my leg /arm joints ached like they were on fire all night , then I was coughing and throwing up ....  at 7am ..

so I got up

so turned out the safe drawer again ,,nope

sorted out other piles of crap ,,, and binned then ......  nope

went around other piles of books / paper / shite which the poltergeist has now put in the bin ...  still nope

then when I looked out of the window ... there it was by the picture frame within arms reach of her pillow  , behind a book ....  

was 100 per cent never ever given to me to put away !!!

on the bright side I found a lost Asus tablet and cleared out loads of shite .

[myglaren]

^ I've been looking for my tube of Autosol.  Bought years ago to remove wiper scratches from the Volvo windscreen*

It has always lived on/in a small set of shelves in the understairs cupboard.  Looked there a dozen times and was blaming my son for taking it for his bike.

Looking for something completely different (not found) here's the Autosol right in front of me.

I estimate that it has been there over 20 years

 

*bought a replacement windscreen from a scrappy, spend several hours on a very hot July day removing it, got it home, removed the old one, fitted the replacement and went to clean it.

Someone had been using the wipers with no blade in and scratched some impressive arcs in the drivers half.  Took several hours and much Autosol and a B&D with polishing mop on to get it acceptable.

[dozeydustman]

On 5/22/2019 at 7:02 PM, dozeydustman said:

Thank you @Fumbler. I've not heard anything as to how advanced it is but MiLaw has been recommended to go for chemo as they *think* it's treatable at the moment. Knowing my in-laws they are not letting on the whole situation. Just got to support my wife and stepdaughter as much as possible and take some of the pressure off father in law - he's 78 and still as active as he can be with bad hips and bad knees.  I'm hoping my nearby nieces and nephews pick up the baton from time to time as well.

I have 2 sister in laws, one on the Isle of Wight who I know will try and get over most if not every weekend to see her, the other is totally hopeless at supporting others in times of need and is the sort that would normally claim she's had the same condition as someone but 9 times worse and survived it, because she lives in her own little bubble.

Father in law received a letter this morning. MiLaw doesn't get to see an oncologist for nearly another month. I don't know if this is because she's quite frail at the moment and may not be able to stand any therapies, or the writing is on the wall for her, or it's been caught early enough not to warrant urgent care. Hospital have offered no advice, leaflets etc to my father in law so this morning Mrs D and I have been contacting loads of charities etc for some advice. 

Perplexed and disappointed about this.

[MorrisItalSLX]

Chest infections suck.

[Inspector Morose]

Bought my first reading glasses today after 47 years of spectacle-less sight.

I am now officially old.

[MikeR]

Hamster drivers ...

Today every middle lane hogger has been one .. 

How can they drive like that ?

[chaseracer]

36 minutes ago, FPB7 said:

Bought my first reading glasses today after 47 years of spectacle-less sight.

I am now officially old.

Welcome to middle age, friend.

I am, of course, suitably ashamed of my initial reaction above...

?

[Tadhg Tiogar]

1 hour ago, FPB7 said:

Bought my first reading glasses today after 47 years of spectacle-less sight.

I am now officially old.

Reading glasses!? Lightweight!

Ye're old if those 47 years have ended up in having to wear varifocals. 

[myglaren]

1 hour ago, Tadhg Tiogar said:

Reading glasses!? Lightweight!

Ye're old if those 47 years have ended up in having to wear varifocals. 

I'm somewhat older, can't be doing with varifocals/bifocals so have three pair (actually 5, a couple of duplicates) and four pair are buggered, need updating

[Tadhg Tiogar]

6 minutes ago, myglaren said:

.... can't be doing with varifocals/bifocals ...

I put it off as long as I could. But resistance was futile.

[dozeydustman]

3 hours ago, MikeR said:

Hamster drivers ...

Today every middle lane hogger has been one .. 

How can they drive like that ?

Hamster drivers?

[MikeR]

The ones that hug the steering wheel with nose touching the wheel ......

I could not get in the car if the seat was that far forward !

[MikeR]

Another day another grump .. Yesterday it was a gaggle of  tandams ...  As in many trying to climb a steep twistry hill together .... And i am stuck 3 cars back from a "carefull driver " who cant/could not get past the lead bike to save his life ..  Lead bike nearly stops because its a f in steep hill  .. The carefull  car does stop..  And We all stop on this 1 in 8 .. And the  trailing tandams dont want to stop on a 1 in 8 because they dont have handbrake . so they starts overtaking the stopped cars . wobbling uphill on a blind bend on the wrong side of the road .

 

Darwin still lives .

 

ps . found the car cam footage , woman on the left was looking at us as if the say "what the f is going on " ...  and behind me to my right is a tandem coming up the outside of the cars !!

[bigstraight6]

On 5/26/2019 at 5:41 PM, FPB7 said:

Bought my first reading glasses today after 47 years of spectacle-less sight.

I am now officially old.

That’s the age I reached when I found quite by accident I needed glasses to read, 4 years on now and sight is bang on except the glasses for reading issue, I really struggle to read anything without glasses now.

[dozeydustman]

6 hours ago, volvov70 said:

Father V  had two Meso tumors removed from his left lung three weeks ago - he is fine. Lung cancer is pretty much curable these days if caught early enough.

My thoughts are with you.

Thank you for the kind words. We're not entirely sure what timescale we're looking at but have been told already that it's inoperable. TBH I think months or even weeks as she's getting very very weak.

[Zelandeth]

What is it with me finding the most self important assholes of "traffic officers" lately?
Just got given an absolute ear bending for "revving my engine in an antisocial and intimidating manner."

I blipped the throttle when shifting down from second to first as I came to a halt... because it's an old school commercial box and will often crunch at you if you don't double declutch while doing that...though you wouldn't know what double declutching was if I battered you round the head with the IAM handbook would you...

Absolute asshole... absolutely suited the BMW he was driving...

[chaseracer]

What manner of 'traffic officer' was this, Zel - proper plod or highway womble?

[LightBulbFun]

3 minutes ago, Zelandeth said:

What is it with me finding the most self important assholes of "traffic officers" lately?
Just got given an absolute ear bending for "revving my engine in an antisocial and intimidating manner."

I blipped the throttle when shifting down from second to first as I came to a halt... because it's an old school commercial box and will often crunch at you if you don't double declutch while doing that...though you wouldn't know what double declutching was if I battered you round the head with the IAM handbook would you...

Absolute asshole... absolutely suited the BMW he was driving...

that sounds like you where in the camper van

why would someone think you would be ""revving your engine in an antisocial and intimidating manner." in a 30 year camper van?!

as I said before with the Xantia incident, its going to be a right laugh if they make the mistake of pulling you over in the Model 70

 

[Zelandeth]

Aye... menacingly displaying all 78 raging horses the camper van has to offer.
 

Was one of the highways agency idiots as always seems to be the case around here.

He'd been following me for about 20 minutes, so had obviously decided he wanted to give me hassle long  before I turned into a car park and he boxed me in.

 

Good thing he didn't follow me home... someone has spilled something all over one of the roundabouts which has reacted with the water from a recent deluge to make it into a giant foaming skidpan.  Wound up drifting a good 3/4 of the way round it on about 50% opposite lock - at about 15mph.

[jumpingjehovahs]

Aye... menacingly displaying all 78 raging horses the camper van has to offer.
 
Was one of the highways agency idiots as always seems to be the case around here.
He'd been following me for about 20 minutes, so had obviously decided he wanted to give me hassle long  before I turned into a car park and he boxed me in.
 
Good thing he didn't follow me home... someone has spilled something all over one of the roundabouts which has reacted with the water from a recent deluge to make it into a giant foaming skidpan.  Wound up drifting a good 3/4 of the way round it on about 50% opposite lock - at about 15mph.

How can a Highways Agency Officer justify following you and then offering advice on your driving? Certainly, he can’t have any power to block your vehicle in and prevent you from moving on?


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[chaseracer]

Way exceeding his already spurious 'authority'...

[sheffcortinacentre]

Last womble that came on to me like that was told to go hassle someone who thinks they were guna be taken in by his pretend plod appearance.

His female associate said I want your name & address so I asked are you a police officer?

Her reply was no.

So I said Im not giving you them then, you could be going to give them to your mate to burgle me seeing as I'm broken down overan hour from home.now go away I'm waiting for the AA.

A mate who's a time served mechanic was changing a tyre on the hard should when as if by magic one appeared beside him & during the procedure was constantly told you shouldn't be doing that you should get to a safe position & wait for a professional to come do that when he done he said I am but it's my day off but I still now what to do see you  & drove off.

You should have took there details & reported him traffic cops can't stand them.