What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[Floatylight]

3 hours ago, somewhatfoolish said:

SpaceX win contract for Tesco Express home delivery.

This lives just around the corner from me in Stafford! Where's the pic taken?

[omegod]

I've done the sleep pissing thing after a heavy session when about 19, woke up and relieved myself on the gas heater in my bedroom. thankfully it wasn't electric! woke up halfway through and stumbled backwards into a freestanding mirror and basically sat into it, impaling my self with a massive pointy shard of glass in the process, poor mum had the shock of her life when she came in to see what the noise was  as it looked like a slaughterhouse in there. Blue lights, much embarrassment and many stitches  followed 

I was a proper tit when young

[somewhatfoolish]

4 hours ago, Floatylight said:

This lives just around the corner from me in Stafford! Where's the pic taken?

No idea, I pinched it off farceache.

[dome]

An iconic V8 powered car in a fetching shade of green. Parked beside some old Ford

[myglaren]

[Wack]

On 7/29/2021 at 9:45 AM, Wack said:

Twat of the week award goes to this guy 

Spoiler - twat 

Driving on the beach in a lowered sports car - twat 

Getting stuck- twat 

Best bit , he's a banned driver 

 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/3535660586462020/permalink/4623396581021743/

Update 

 

 

 

 

 

Update 

[somewhatfoolish]

Did it get a briny wash?

[SRi05]

God I've missed Scottish fitba 

 

[Wack]

4 hours ago, somewhatfoolish said:

Did it get a briny wash?

No they dragged it off , as he was already banned I'm thinking it was an expensive photoshoot 

[Wack]

Just Eat 

Never used it before , the mechanic stayed behind to get my smart car back on the road so I bought us lunch 

He fancied KFC so that's what we had , driver was there within 15 minutes , brilliant , only once he'd gone I noticed only one can of tango 

So I look at the app ,

I'm not happy with my order , was something missing , 

sent it off , within an hour a full refund for one of the meals , impressed with that 

[Tadhg Tiogar]

18 minutes ago, Wack said:

No they dragged it off , as he was already banned I'm thinking it was an expensive photoshoot 

I wonder if the ban will be extended. Not that an extension would make any difference as the beach incident may not have been the only time he's ignored his original ban.

Herts Road Traffic recently picked up a disqualified driver who was only 48 hours from the end of his current ban, but who didn't give a shit and got behind the wheel anyway.

[reb]

What's better than an XUD?

Two XUDs!

[Soundwave]

The journey to the FOTU today was the first time I've used the 216 for an extended journey. It performed pretty much flawlessly, bar a slight wheel wobble at 70 - must go and have the wheels tracked and balanced at some point.

Very impressed at how efficient it is on a run - did a 130 mile round trip on less than £20 of pez, which is impressive for a 1.6 engine with its design roots in the 80s. It's pretty comfy too - I remember driving my Beetle to and from VW shows back in the day, even after a relatively short trip I'd be tired and aching, as if I'd been slipped a sedative and then suplexed into a rockery. No such issues here, was completely fine when I got home!

Overall, really pleased with how it performed. So pleased, I'm going to gloss over the fact it's a Honda Concerto in a tweed jacket and declare this a victory for British design.

[Sir Chocolate Teapot]

10 days quarantine finishes today.

I am free, in soo many ways now, new life starts today.

I will take a walk.

Take the sj for a spin. 

Finally look at the Honda civic o bought off here and got delivered 8 months ago. I have a box of goodies all ready to service it.

Onwards and upwards. 

[beko1987]

Got a hoover friend coming over for a chat, coffee and to pick up some machines I've refurbished for him and his BMW X5 4.4 v8 splaffed a load of coolant out at him last night... 

ARSE is on standby from my end  but he seems to be doing well so far!

[beko1987]

My friend made it fine, seems to be a split header tank. Barely used any coolant though. 

Its a lovely beast, smells like new despite being a 54 plate. He drives 3 miles a day and says its no more to run than his old derv BMW for that (and is fully ulez compliant. 

Gets 8mpg in lahndan, he had it to 27.3 coming here doing 65 so as to not make the coolant escape. Can't say I wasn't a bit jealous, although I'd still not get one. 

 

[vulgalour]

That, I believe, is the very last of the old wiring removed from the Lanchester.  Took four hours just to get the one run out of the chassis, like, but it's done.  Ready for the new wiring to go in which will hopefully be easier now I know what I'm doing.

[richardmorris]

On 7/30/2021 at 5:42 AM, Austat said:

 

Tom dean was trying not to laugh. 

[warch]

My spray gun packed in yesterday afternoon as I was about to lay a lovely thick coat of Bronze Green enamel on my Land Rover panels. A bit of desultory dismantling revealed that one of the o rings on the trigger was buggered. Despite having had hundreds of o rings in various service kits for things that I've never used, I could only find one, which was the same size and girth as a cock ring (apparently). 

Luckily popped into my local motor factors on a whim this morning and managed to find a replacement o ring for the princely sum of 5 pence. I can't actually remember the last time I spent 5p in a shop before, probably in the early 80s.  

[Agila]

42 minutes ago, warch said:

same size and girth as a cock ring

 

42 minutes ago, warch said:

the princely sum of 5 pence

Buy them, stick them in some sexy packaging, job done.

Dragon's den idea?

[warch]

10 minutes ago, Agila said:

 

Buy them, stick them in some sexy packaging, job done.

Dragon's den idea?

I should point out that the 5p ones have an internal diameter of about 5mm, so unless you are hung like Richard Richard or are going for hardcore levels of blood restriction then a larger size would probably be advisable.

[vulgalour]

The Lanchester wiring, it is routed!  Last section didn't go too badly apart from getting rained on at a point in the job where I couldn't really stop.  Just to connect things up and test and whatnot now... when it stops raining that is, and my arms have recovered from being noodles.

[reb]

Actual business venture or a ploy to get a Hellfrauds trade card? Only time will tell.

[Tickman]

That's a good idea Robin

 

[reb]

40 minutes ago, Tickman said:

That's a good idea Robin

 

It worked too!

[hairnet]

Got  huggyed :D

Thanks eewar ya madman @eddyramrod

[Minimad5]

Visited a flower selling place full of old folk, the good lady was enjoying looking at pretty flowers and spender her hard earned ££.

All through this posh gaff I was getting the beedy eye from staff (anyone who knows me will know I dress like a scruffy fecker) ... so anyway an old bloke approaches us and asks were we got the trolley from, the poor bloke was on two walking sticks and looked a tad wobbly on his legs, so I told him to wait and I'll return with one, of which a member of staff overheard & looked shocked that this scruffy bastard was helping someone out, he thanked me endlessly - which was lovely. And the 'fuck you' grin the helpful* staff member recieved made my day 😅

Didn't stop them counting all items in the trolly 4 times and checking we hadn't hidden anything between plants 🤦‍♂️

 

[beko1987]

[eddyramrod]

14 hours ago, hairnet said:

Got  huggyed :D

Thanks eewar ya madman @eddyramrod

Good to see you again, young man!  It's been much too long!

[808 Estate]