What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[vulgalour]

Spindlewhip Crosspole is definitely somebody's upper class boarding school chum.

[Wack]

I hope that's not a body

[Joey spud]

I went to use my Hiace today but both its batteries were near flat,i know i will jump it off my year old Sprinter...

After 20 mins of boosting it off the mighty German brand the result was barely any improvement  so step forward the little Daihatsu.

Five minutes later and the Toyota clattered in to life emitting a lovely claggy cloud that you just don't get these days.

[hairnet]

I r disapoint the cop in the drive thru before me didn't order any donuts

[warch]

I am no expert but I think I may have identified some previously undiscovered work by Banksy, or at the very least someone whose work also contains the trademark shared elements of satirical street artwork and subversive epigrams, combining dark humour with graffiti executed in a distinctive stenciling technique.

#reclaimthestreets #mkhanisbent

[loserone]

4 hours ago, Wack said:

I hope that's not a body

Rigor Mortis

[Remspoor]

4 hours ago, warch said:

I am no expert but I think I may have identified some previously undiscovered work by Banksy, or at the very least someone whose work also contains the trademark shared elements of satirical street artwork and subversive epigrams, combining dark humour with graffiti executed in a distinctive stenciling technique.

#reclaimthestreets #mkhanisbent

Bearded exploring Youtube*  was there?

[Wack]

5 hours ago, loserone said:

Rigor Mortis

When the kids were about 9&11 we went to Amsterdam for a long weekend , I'd drawn a big X through the red light district so we could avoid it which we almost did

Early Sunday morning we were walking down this street when we passed a sex shop with a black Dildo in the window you could've used to moor a boat 

I just said to Mrs wack , if you ignore it they might not notice , no chance , my 9 year old daughter pointed at it, what's that 

 

[camryv6]

12 minutes ago, Wack said:

When the kids were about 9&11 we went to Amsterdam for a long weekend , I'd drawn a big X through the red light district so we could avoid it which we almost did

Early Sunday morning we were walking down this street when we passed a sex shop with a black Dildo in the window you could've used to moor a boat 

I just said to Mrs wack , if you ignore it they might not notice , no chance , my 9 year old daughter pointed at it, what's that 

 

Well what did you say ?

[richardmorris]

17 minutes ago, camryv6 said:

Well what did you say ?

I’m all ears. It’s not like it’s going to be mistaken for anything else.

[Wack]

I just ignored her hoping she'd shut up which thankfully she did 

[warch]

Last time I went to the ‘Dam was with a group of mates, one of whom was desperate to shag a prostitute. Not sure why, must’ve been a bucket list thing or something. Despite being outwardly confident about the whole idea he ended up prevaricating so much that he ended being taken down to the red light district by another mate’s girlfriend so she could do all the ‘setting up’ for him and so she could make sure he got a nice girl to go with.

[beko1987]

1 minute ago, warch said:

Last time I went to the ‘Dam was with a group of mates, one of whom was desperate to shag a prostitute. Not sure why, must’ve been a bucket list thing or something. Despite being outwardly confident about the whole idea he ended up prevaricating so much that he ended being taken down to the red light district by another mate’s girlfriend so she could do all the ‘setting up’ for him and so she could make sure he got a nice girl to go with.

They use so much lube I doubt he'd notice either way. So I've heard... 

[eddyramrod]

The Yorkshire Tea ad with Sean Bean has just been on.  "Do it for Yorkshire!" :)

[Aston Martin]

Stolen from Twitter I apologise in advance.

[beko1987]

35 minutes ago, Aston Martin said:

Stolen from Twitter I apologise in advance.

[DSdriver]

43 minutes ago, Aston Martin said:

Stolen from Twitter I apologise in advance.

 

Turn your posh Citroen into a mobile portaloo

[somewhatfoolish]

 

Holy good gravy, a demountable camper modelled on the remora fish.

[Stanky]

I'm done in, I've spent a goodly portion of yesterday and today painting the fences in the garden and I'm exhausted! I've done about 40m of 6' high fence panels in Ronseal 'one-coat*' stain.

They look good though, and doing it now means I could get in behind all the shrubs in the border on one side while the leaves have fallen off. I just have 2 smaller panels to do on one side that I can't get at until the new grass I put down as seed has grown a bit more, and its less boggy, plus the far end which I think is three more 4' x 6' panels but I need another tub of stain for that.

I'm pretty pleased with how it looks, and I'm also very pleased that of the three fences that hem in my garden, I'm only responsible for one of them. And its the most recent and most stable by quite a long way!

 

[hairnet]

4 hours ago, Aston Martin said:

Stolen from Twitter I apologise in advance.

 

humped by a whale.........

[Noel Tidybeard]

20 hours ago, eddyramrod said:

The Yorkshire Tea ad with Sean Bean has just been on.  "Do it for Yorkshire!"

shame they've cut the "tea break" bit off though

[hairnet]

 

❤️

[MikeR]

When you don't quite catch the writing on a product and go "what !" 

[Wack]

[myglaren]

 

[Parky]

In an age of political upheaval, global instability, pandemics and conspiracies, there is a person in New Zealand who cuts through the confusion and reports on what really matters

Keith Fishingham, 22 from somewhere cold said he had “been on a massive sesh with some Walruses” and last remembered climbing into a Taxi outside an Ice Bar.  He said he had enjoyed the Park “especially the roundabout” but eventually a Policeman with a Pork and Apple with Sage had proved too tempting.

”Normally I’m more into Fish but variety, spice of life and all that”

Keith was last seen heading home.  When asked whether he knew the way, he said “Its OK mate, there’s some Japanese whaling ships nearby, I will check with them.  Cheers yeah”

Lovely tale all round.  

[Inspector Morose]

I’m sure it’s safe to post here as nobody from my extended family would ever frequent such a forum focused on vehicular nonsense.

I watched a programme on BBC iplayer yesterday. Nothing unusual with that, I know, but it was narrated from start to finish by my niece. 
I know I have played no part in the tireless effort and tenacity on her part in achieving what she has achieved so far and I know that she will grow much, much further.

Still, makes me feel a bit proud of her.

 

[hairnet]

1 hour ago, Inspector Morose said:

I’m sure it’s safe to post here as nobody from my extended family would ever frequent such a forum focused on vehicular nonsense.

I watched a programme on BBC iplayer yesterday. Nothing unusual with that, I know, but it was narrated from start to finish by my niece. 
I know I have played no part in the tireless effort and tenacity on her part in achieving what she has achieved so far and I know that she will grow much, much further.

Still, makes me feel a bit proud of her.

 

is she david attenborough or martin jarvis

anything interesting?

 

[Inspector Morose]

I don't know, someone might find it interesting.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m000rtf3/our-world-new-orleans-the-year-the-music-stopped

[warch]

Had an unusual car accident this morning, hit a snowman. I was assuming snowmen would be soft and fluffy, this was like hitting a boulder.