What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[Lacquer Peel]

 

My sister's racist, ignorant partner left his laptop and Facebook open.

[rantingYoof]

True that, some of the list items are a little spurious to my uninformed mind (never heard of ferrules ever).

 

But it's generally indicative of someone offloading a car to a dealer to avoid the impending repair bill. Even if you take out the harsher items on the list and DIY the others you're looking at increasing your purchase price by 30%.

 

Sent from my GT-I9505 using Tapatalk

[Eddie Honda]

watched Comfort and Joy ( loads of quality chod on display)

"IT'S DICKY BIRD"

 

Love that film.

[Tamworthbay]

My sister's racist, ignorant partner left his laptop and Facebook open.

Surely that was time for him to come out of the closet.........

[Lacquer Peel]

I think that would have pushed him over the edge, being seen as a "left wing prick" by his degenerate neo-Nazi Facebook friends was bad enough. I'm hiding.

[fordperv]

Surely that was time for him to come out of the closet.........

With an ethnic minority partner who he is going to have a civil partnership with as he popped the question on Christmas day

[Sigmund Fraud]

To be honest at lot of that list is bollocks. It's an old car.

Agreed, he could have condensed all those advisories into one : "The car is not new, and has appropriate wear and tear for its mileage."

[MrDuke]

I'm giving him a feckin' good hiding.

 

FTFY

[Cavcraft]

 

My sister's racist, ignorant partner left his laptop and Facebook open.

 

I can't make that out Is it some sort of Britain First fucking nonsense?

[Lacquer Peel]

It's a status I posted on his wall of racist meathead shit, you can't see it.

[Cavcraft]

Talking  of FaceAche, I've just found this as I was snooping round: John Jackson (tattoo)

 

 

 

It doesn't even seem to be a Photoshop. Fabulous.

[MrDuke]

Can someone tell me what the second sentence is supposed to say? I mean, I'm LOLing heartily at the whole 'eyes turned skyward' thing, but still feel I'm missing something?

 

EDIT: Hang on, I've just looked closer at it. Apparently he's threatening to kick a fox so hard between the back legs, that not only will it leave the ground for an appreciable length of time, it will likely spend the rest of its life squitty-eyed. I still can't quite make sense of the second half. Help?

[Stanky]

I thought I had it, but no, the second sentence is actual drivel and makes no sense whatsoever.

[rantingYoof]

Agreed, he could have condensed all those advisories into one : "The car is not new, and has appropriate wear and tear for its mileage."

 

My car is around the same age and I'd be mortified if the underneath was 'very very rusty'!

 

If it were a 1996 GS300 then I'd understand a wee bit more.

 

Still, what you have done is accidentally challenge me to find the newest car with the worst list of advisories.

 

I mean, you've given me an excuse to go on Autotrader again, really

[Sheefag]

I had a 93, Mk1 GS300, it was reliable, dependable, dull, thirsty and underpowered. It was difficult to believe it came from the same firm that produced the LS400.

I seem to remember that the Mk2, and this is a Mk2, was different only cosmetically from the Mk1.

[Ghosty]

Visited my parent's new house for the first time. it was bought by a lady in the mid 1970s and rebuilt and boy does it show...

 

 

It's all getting torn out and refurbished so I took some photos so you too can bask in it's 1970s awfulness.

 

That vaguely resembles my uncle's flat in south London that hasn't been done up since some time in the 1980s. He has a cooker with a gas grill...

 

My mate bought some bikes off a giffer on eBay, and he had a proper late '70s timewarp house too. He drove a Volvo V40 that stank of stale smoke and the wheels on either side didn't match, two were off a Rover 25 and fuck knows what was on the other side.

[Pillock]

A friend bought us the best pressie ever this year.

 

We now have a light up toilet, activated by dark and motion....

 

[Richard]

A friend bought us the best pressure ever this year.

 

We now have a light up toilet, activated by dark and motions....

 

 

FTFY

[Kiltox]

Give me strength Autoshite for I am seriously considering flogging everything and buying a Dacia with a warranty and service plan!

 

Edit - thought I was on the grumpy thread, bugger

[bub2006]

A dacia is modern shite though. I toyed with the idea of a new duster briefly

[beko1987]

I'd roll in a new dacia if the opportunity presented itself.

 

In 8 to 10 years I fully expect them to be the new goona2 and everyone have one, then the fresh wave of 'this place isn't what it used to be' can start

[privatewire]

I've got a Duster, I can confirm that they are shite. They are a hoot to drive though.

[Kiltox]

I've got a Duster, I can confirm that they are shite. They are a hoot to drive though.

What spec?

[privatewire]

It's a Laureate, so aircon, electric windows, alloys. 2 wheel drive version. Great for lugging bikes and snowboard kit about.

[Kiltox]

Haven't found anyone with the shite spec Access yet

[privatewire]

I looked at an Access spec one before I got mine, I was quite keen, but the one I bought came up at the same price, so it was a no brainer I thought. Also the Access one was at Arnold Shark.....

[DVee8]

Spotted these today made me smile.

[Kiltox]

I looked at an Access spec one before I got mine, I was quite keen, but the one I bought came up at the same price, so it was a no brainer I thought. Also the Access one was at Arnold Shark.....

Speaking of Arnie I'm seeing 1.5 DCI Laureates for less than ten grand on 65 plates - might make more sense than a brand new Access

[Kiltox]

Spotted these today made me smile.

[attachment=99883:20161227_145437.jpg

20161227_145348.jpg

My other half bought me these for a laugh - it's actually lovely beer and it doesn't go on about lease cars when you open it which is a surprise

[hairnet]

Haven't found anyone with the shite spec Access yet

 

 

I looked at an Access spec one before I got mine, I was quite keen, but the one I bought came up at the same price, so it was a no brainer I thought. Also the Access one was at Arnold Shark.....

 

was looking at sh access but the old fart doesnt like white cars and didnt like the bumpers

 

i said for 4k (wasnt buying a new one) what do you expect

 

if snob gonna happen i buy you a car and youll have to use it - sold the civic and bought the panda

 

which she doesnt like but i bought it and she'll have to make do

 

also shes 70 next year and if they stop her driving it would be 4k down the shitta cos i certainly wouldnt keep it