What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[paulplom]

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My mate has just sent me that. Not sure wether it's a piss take or a compliment!

 

Sent from my SM-G950F using Tapatalk

[hairnet]

Straight vod in a mineral water bottle?

you can take the man outta chester

[tommytwo]

Reading all these grins on here reminded me of something that happened some time ago now.  The company where I was working was going through much change that we were finding very stressful. So plenty of people signed off sick and soon we were down to half strength in the workshop. The company hired two medical professionals to give every employee a medical examination. So two of us get called to the sick bay, get a full physical, and then get passed on to a nurse for further tests. One of the tests was for lung function. My friend John was always  a joker but this time, he went much further than I would have done. He went first on the lung test but this was not good enough for the nurse, who grabbed the tube from him and said, "NO. Not like that. You do it like this" and she demonstrated how to do it. John pipes up and says " You wouldn't be any good for a blow job" I was shocked and also the nurse, who seemed to rock back on her feet. But quick as a flash, she recovered and replied, "I haven't had any complaints" We all were laughing so hard that that part of the examination was never completed.

 

Looking back now on my working life, I have had the privilege of working with some great people.

[wuvvum]

Worzel_Gummidge lost animated film. - has me on YouTube. Classic - big smiles. Have to show munchkin………

When my parents were first married they lived over the road from John Pertwee.  True story.

[kinkersaab]

[loserone]

Twice on the same page!

[kinkersaab]

Bugger sorry chaps...was on my phone and didn't bother scrolling back.

[fordperv]

[PhilA]

Driving to work at 2am in the lashing rain, howling wind with a sky lit up blue and purple by the lightning, with Gordon Lightfoot - The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald playing.

 

Phil

[Aston Martin]

Jeremy Vine is intolerable... But today we had a dogging call in so.....

[Remspoor]

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I laughed at the very poor photo shopping.

[eddyramrod]

I got a letter today asking me to go for a job interview in two weeks!

[loserone]

Hope you're driving to it Eddy

[eddyramrod]

So do I!!!!!!!

[omegod]

Spotted this outside the local scrappy, an old guy who works there was sitting in it looking very proud of his creation, yes that is Lambo doors and side exit exhaust fitted to a shitty Pug diesel estate, I didn't have the balls to take a frontal shot but it had to be seen to be believed, it's in use  

 

 

 

[mrbenn]

I got a letter today asking me to go for a job interview in two weeks!

 

Bloody good luck, Eddy!

 

What's the job?

[richardmorris]

From the swinley MTB pages on Facebook.

[eddyramrod]

Bloody good luck, Eddy!

 

What's the job?

I don't want to put any kind of jinx on it yet...

(But thank you, anyway )

[FakeConcern]

[cort16]

Some great old car trade pictures on car sales memes

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

https://www.facebook.com/carsalesmemes/

[Kiltox]

FFS Beko, out of order m8

 

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-47391080

[beko1987]

FFS Beko, out of order m8

 

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-47391080

How do you think I got a boot full of parts to fix my car the week before payday...

 

Anyway, James made me do it

[beko1987]

 

Turncoat bastard dobbed me in. I'll be out one day if your listening, I'll rip the motor from your stupid non cord rewind head with a lump hammer whilst you sleep

[Kiltox]

Always thought James was a wrong ‘un

[purplebargeken]

The CQC are due to visit our Trust Very Soon.

 

I have informed my management team that I intend to answer each question the CQC person may ask thusly: 'I believe that may be an ecumenical matter'.

 

I see no flaw with this plan, especially as I retire in 57 days.

[anonymous user]

Hopefully you will not do a full Father Jack if you get fed up with the questions

[beko1987]

AA fun this morning, got our renewal letter yesterday, £29 a month...

 

Called up, best they can do is £24 a month sir, of course we are more expensive than our competitors (I read him my green flag quote for £14.50 a month) as we are the best blah blah added services blah blah we can fix your car at the roadside if you have an accident (WTF, how does that work. "Oh hi, yea I hit a tree at 65mph could you rebuild the front end of my car so I can continue my journey?)

 

OK, thanks, please cancel

But,,,

CANCEL. PLEASE. NOW

 

Amy's ears pricked up at this point as I was on loudspeaker as I was on the laptop at the time, I could see her mouthing 'are you sure, what are you doing?'. Told her to watch, as I couldnt talk as they can still hear me even though I'm on hold whilst he cancels.

 

'OK Mr Watson, that's cancelled for you, however if I could ju... *ping, cancellation email* "Have a good day, bye" - hang up

 

Amy then worries that I've cancelled the breakdown cover, she's obviously come to like it as a safety net, remembering me having to use it in the past (ZX collection, Xantia cambelt failure). Hang on, why have I got an email from the AA welcoming me?

 

Because as soon as the cancellation email came through, I hit buy on an identical policy, same cover, same cars, same bank account... but in Amys name. £15 a month

 

Welcome to the AA love, I'm off to work, bye!

 

Chancing fuckers!

[Kiltox]

£15 a month? Autoaid is £44 a year

[loserone]

Is that home assist too or coming with a warranty or something?

[Sheefag]

Some great old car trade pictures on car sales memes

 

 

 

 

 

https://www.facebook.com/carsalesmemes/

Free Cockbooks. Now that's how you to drag the punters in.