Project A Rock and Rolla Y2K Toyota Corolla

60,356 · January 22

19 hours ago, Split_Pin said:

You're not foolish, just into old cars. I had an awful 2024 with one bad motoring decision after another. All in I must have ended the year taking at least a £2k bath.

This is where @cort16 comes in and says "haud ma Buckie"...

2,815 · January 22

I can’t help with the troublesome Audi but the little red Mini from a couple of pages back looks the absolute bollocks.

Literally nothing could be done to make that car look any cooler than it already does!

35,110 · January 23

Have agreed a few more jobs on the basis that I'm now balls deep into it anyway, so I might as well use this time to get it as straight as I can.

This is me picking up the car later this week.

31,347 · January 23

Laughing emoji only for the video clip 😞

35,110 · January 27

So the Audi is home. The bill was somewhat, err, weighty. For those who like to keep tally (my ex-wife for example) the total bill was £1,411.50. Quite a lot was done, including two new lower arms, new bushes, new alternator, new alternator belt, new front shock absorbers, new rear brake cylinders, shoes and drums, new rear brake pipe and a few other shits and bits. So much for bangernomics, I've now got a thousand pound's worth of car that owes me £2,200. God I'm good at this whole life thing eh?!

I'd love to say it drives brilliantly now, but that would be a bit of a lie. I think it still needs a driveshaft as it has always made quite a groan on full lock under power and the rear shocks (provided by previous owner) will need to be fitted sooner than the MOT in November.

I didn't think I was a snob at all, but I guess jumping from a Saab to this has been a bit of a culture shock. The 3 cylinder diesel has all the refinement of a female Russian bodybuilder with flatulence and the lack of a radio to drown it out is become tedious. (The engine, not the farting).

Nonetheless, it's time the car is put to work properly and has a chance to earn my affections. I went to pick up a desk from Freecycle yesterday and I wasn't completely confident that it would fit in the Sierra. Two minutes later and the seats were out of the Audi.

A quick run to Hitchin and back and here we are!

And installed at the top of the house.

The Sierra is due to go to a different garage later this week for some remedials. I have no idea how I'm going to pay the bill, but unless it's in usable fettle then there's fuck all point in having it.

Cars eh?

42,441 · January 27

58 minutes ago, BorniteIdentity said:

So the Audi is home. The bill was somewhat, err, weighty. For those who like to keep tally (my ex-wife for example) the total bill was £1,411.50. Quite a lot was done, including two new lower arms, new bushes, new alternator, new alternator belt, new front shock absorbers, new rear brake cylinders, shoes and drums, new rear brake pipe and a few other shits and bits. So much for bangernomics, I've now got a thousand pound's worth of car that owes me £2,200. God I'm good at this whole life thing eh?!

I'd love to say it drives brilliantly now, but that would be a bit of a lie. I think it still needs a driveshaft as it has always made quite a groan on full lock under power and the rear shocks (provided by previous owner) will need to be fitted sooner than the MOT in November.

I didn't think I was a snob at all, but I guess jumping from a Saab to this has been a bit of a culture shock. The 3 cylinder diesel has all the refinement of a female Russian bodybuilder with flatulence and the lack of a radio to drown it out is become tedious. (The engine, not the farting).

Nonetheless, it's time the car is put to work properly and has a chance to earn my affections. I went to pick up a desk from Freecycle yesterday and I wasn't completely confident that it would fit in the Sierra. Two minutes later and the seats were out of the Audi.

A quick run to Hitchin and back and here we are!

And installed at the top of the house.

The Sierra is due to go to a different garage later this week for some remedials. I have no idea how I'm going to pay the bill, but unless it's in usable fettle then there's fuck all point in having it.

Cars eh?

Loving the A2! Im in the same situation with my rover 75; its a grands worth of car, and ive spent as much again sorting it. I tell myself its fine as i like the car, and i need something go to as the solid backbone of the fleet for the heavy lifting and trudgery.

8,207 · January 27

What a saga. Hopefully this the end of the shit and it'll be all rosy from now on (and hopefully I haven't jinxed things further by saying that).

Sometimes the Autoshite life is like Northern Soul you gotta

'til the good times roll around again.

27,114 · January 27

Sounds similar to my usual routine!

Buy car for ~£1000, spend £1500 on getting it up to scratch, sell for less than I bought it for!

2,433 · January 27

/quintenwillson This is a proper classic though.

Genuinely, it’ll be worth the effort to say you saved a pioneering vehicle of the ICE / hybrid crossover period.

Treat it as a long term investment and within a couple of years it’ll be repaying you with routine oil changes and nothing else.

60,356 · January 28

35,110 · January 28

2 hours ago, wuvvum said:

There was a bit of frothing excitement on the (in fairness fairly useful) Audi A2 facebook group about this. Plenty of people thinking that the PD common rail engine could save the world. When I suggested that one particularly vocal poster may wish to stick his gob around my pipe (fnar fnar) whilst I revved the tits off of my car - he stopped replying.

The 3L is an interesting concept but, from memory, to get the 94 mpg they had to take everything nice out of the car, fit cheaper seats, use a tiny fuel tank and even then you had to nurse it.

Mine has had a remap which makes all the difference but, I dare say, encourages greater DERV consumption. My last mixed tank was 58.5 mpg.

PS: the only 3L to have is this:

Fantastiagrün für das guwinnen.

January 29

We saw one in Denmark in 2023! Not green, boring silver. I got excited and we had to get a pic. They’re very cool, bespoke cars. But like you say, a little compromised. Also ignoring all of the other EV stuff, they’re very good at turning energy into motion. Daresay better than the venerable PD?

19,578 · January 29

The a2 and Lupo are both massively underappreciated designs, I fear they'll all disappear before they get recognised as such.

January 29

On 27/01/2025 at 16:43, BorniteIdentity said:

what a bloody fantastic desk lamp.

35,110 · February 3

The luck continues with the Audi. I managed to reverse it into a friend’s house on Friday. Wheel arch scratched and paint on her wall.

Yesterday, the boot resolutely refused to shut. The remedy was to remove the boot trim. I doubt I’ll ever put it back on - mostly because it fell off immediately when I tried once.

Finally, one of the parents reversed his van into it earlier on outside the school.

I reserve this word for special occasions, but it really is a fucking cunt of a thing.

Looking forward to the third ‘bump’ which will probably be me barrel-rolling down an embankment whilst simultaneously on the phone to the insurance company and on fire.

February 4

@BorniteIdentity - Like @Leyland Worldmaster I run an A2 and love it - As you've found out it's a very spacious car for something so small on the outside! Here's a pic of mine:

I

I was very enthusiastic when @95 quid Peugeot picked yours up, but I think you've experienced the price of a "cheap" car that's been passed through a number of owners in quick succession - The A2 when well-maintained is a very hard-wearing vehicle (mine is on a whisker under 180k miles and I know it will do at least that again), but you have to stay on top of jobs as they become a niggle rather than letting progress to issues - which is a natural thing to let happen when you don't intend to keep a car for very long - e.g. all A2s need a suspension refresh at around the 100k mile mark.

The braking system is very reliable normally - you've been unlucky to experience a failed cylinder as it's a fairly rare fault. Re: Your electrical issues, these can all be solved by a chap on the A2OC forum (which I'm sure you're aware of) called Tom (username is Timmus) relatively inexpensively - he also does a number of upgrades and can add pretty much any option you wish to your A2 to make it more comfortable to drive (a must-have for me for long journeys is cruise control, for example).

My point is, join A2OC for advice (or even just lurk and search for the info you need, every single point you've mentioned so far has its own thread on there), spend the money on getting all the issues sorted and it WILL reward you with excellent reliability and fuel economy - I've just done 75 mpg on a mostly motorway 46 mile journey cruising at 65-70 mph - although mine has a six speed gearbox, yours will still be capable of similar as it's a 75 BHP model which is known to have the edge on fuel economy over the 90 version like mine.

A well-sorted diesel A2 is easily worth more than you've paid for it; not necessarily north of £2 grand, but then as I say above, once jobs are attended to you shouldn't have to revisit them in any way. The exception is, as you've found out, the thermostat on the diesels - which seem particularly failure-prone. The accepted fix on A2OC is to only ever fit genuine ones and even then there's a 5% chance of getting a duff one. Pattern ones never work as well as a good OE one, assuming they work at all.

I wish you well with it and hope its character traits grow on you (along with tiny fuel, road tax and insurance bills of course). Final tip from me - Do a diesel purge to clean out your fuel system, or else start using a fuel additive to eventually achieve the same result - I found the Millers additive worked very well for mine, it may even have made it run a touch quieter although that could be a placebo effect (ensuring your undertray and the cylinder head jacket are all present and correct would probably be more effective).

Millers Oils Diesel Power ECOMAX Fuel Treatment Multishot

35,110 · February 4

4 minutes ago, Dj_efk said:

@BorniteIdentity - Like @Leyland Worldmaster I run an A2 and love it - As you've found out it's a very spacious car for something so small on the outside! Here's a pic of mine:

I

I was very enthusiastic when @95 quid Peugeot picked yours up, but I think you've experienced the price of a "cheap" car that's been passed through a number of owners in quick succession - The A2 when well-maintained is a very hard-wearing vehicle (mine is on a whisker under 180k miles and I know it will do at least that again), but you have to stay on top of jobs as they become a niggle rather than letting progress to issues - e.g. all A2s need a suspension refresh at around the 100k mile mark. A well-sorted diesel A2 is easily worth more than you've paid for it.

The braking system is very reliable normally - you've been unlucky to experience a failed cylinder as it's a fairly rare fault. Re: Your electrical issues, these can all be solved by a chap on the A2OC forum (which I'm sure you're aware of) called Tom (username is Timmus) relatively inexpensively - he also does a number of upgrades and can add pretty much any option you wish to your A2 to make it more comfortable to drive (a must-have for me for long journeys is cruise control, for example).

My point is, join A2OC for advice (or even just lurk and search for the info you need, every single point you've mentioned so far has its own thread on there), spend the money on getting all the issues sorted and it WILL reward you with excellent reliability and fuel economy - I've just done 75 mpg on a mostly motorway 46 mile journey cruising at 65-70 mph - although mine has a six speed gearbox, yours will still be capable of similar as it's a 75 BHP model which is known to have the edge on fuel economy over the 90 version like mine.

I appreciate what you're saying, and I get defensive of cars sometimes too.

Yes - as I said upstream, all of the faults are resultant of delayed maintenance and being laid up. Seized brakes, alternator bearings, worn belt etc.

It may be worth more than the £800 I paid for it, but it's not worth more than the £2,250 it now owes me. Thereth lieth the problemeth. It means I'm sort of stuck with it for now as I can't take a spanking on another car and 2025 simply can't be like last year.

I came into it with high hopes and excitement but I'm already in too deep on a car I don't particularly like. The thought of spending more money on it, at the moment, is completely out of the question. I have no doubt that a nice one is a pleasant thing, but this one just isn't.

PS - whilst it's a 75bhp car it's been remapped. It's running close to 90bhp according to one of the prior owners and you can definitely feel it. I drive sedately and it will always give 62mpg which is very fair indeed. If I had a copy of VAGWOTNOT I'd probably take it back to 75 for extra mingebag.

However, if it's still here at the end of the year I may very well spend £350 on a remap with those guys who can take them to just shy of 120BHP. Then I will rinse it until it grenades itself!

February 4

Understood - These aren't for everyone and it'll be interesting to see whether your opinion of it changes once you've done some proper miles in it without anything else going wrong and hopefully some easier / cheaper fixes you can do yourself. I was thinking after the work you've done it's probably worth around £1500, for what that opinion is worth.

It will definitely be more economical remapped (as long as you drive it fairly carefully as you have been doing of course!). Normally if it's just a map with no other mods you should be on around 100BHP, I'm not sure how you'd get more than that out of it. Either way, I understand they're pretty awful to drive as standard compared with a remapped one due to the narrow power band.

35,110 · February 4

47 minutes ago, Dj_efk said:

Understood - These aren't for everyone and it'll be interesting to see whether your opinion of it changes once you've done some proper miles in it without anything else going wrong and hopefully some easier / cheaper fixes you can do yourself. I was thinking after the work you've done it's probably worth around £1500, for what that opinion is worth.

It will definitely be more economical remapped (as long as you drive it fairly carefully as you have been doing of course!). Normally if it's just a map with no other mods you should be on around 100BHP, I'm not sure how you'd get more than that out of it. Either way, I understand they're pretty awful to drive as standard compared with a remapped one due to the narrow power band.

There was someone on PH who took his car to Stealth and they confessed that all cars are different with varying stock BHP. I guess he had a good one but he got, from memory, 118.bhp.

I will leave it as it is because it's money to change it and - at the moment - the only money it gets is on diesel. I've even given up and left the yellow headlight bulbs in.

Will my opinion of it change? I don't know. I've already done 1,600 miles in it (yes - really) so it's saved me a lot of money on fuel. It just hasn't endeared itself to me in any way.

February 4

Interesting - mine is a 90 version as mentioned and was mapped by Vince at Stealth too, before I got it - the printout that came with the car says 117 BHP.

37,313 · February 4

A2: (1600 miles / 60mpg) * 4.54 * £1.42p/l = £171.95

Saab 9-5: (1600 miles / 28mpg) * 4.54 * £1.39p/l = £358.01

Difference of £186.06 in like a month-ish of use. So you've got like another 8 months of use and it'll break even on fuel with it, if you call it's current value as £750.

Whether a 22+ year old Audi will last that time without making another repair bill is another matter though.

February 4

@BorniteIdentity - last thing from me before I bugger off and leave your fred in peace (!)

Headlamp bulbs - if the current ones really are that shite and you're able to find the £ to do something about it, then speaking from experience I can recommend the following:

Dipped beam (H7): Philips RacingVision GT200 H7 | Twin Car Headlight Bulbs | PowerBulbs UK

High beam (H3): OSRAM Night Breaker Laser (Next Generation) H3 | PowerBulbs UK

With this setup, night driving is safe with decent performance (the best you can get this side of a HID / LED conversion). Hope it helps in case of a need.

35,110 · February 4

3 minutes ago, Dj_efk said:

@BorniteIdentity - last thing from me before I bugger off and leave your fred in peace (!)

Headlamp bulbs - if the current ones really are that shite and you're able to find the £ to do something about it, then speaking from experience I can recommend the following:

Dipped beam (H7): Philips RacingVision GT200 H7 | Twin Car Headlight Bulbs | PowerBulbs UK

High beam (H3): OSRAM Night Breaker Laser (Next Generation) H3 | PowerBulbs UK

With this setup, night driving is safe with decent performance (the best you can get this side of a HID / LED conversion). Hope it helps in case of a need.

They are fairly dreadful but my eyes have adjusted quite well to the amber glow! It's like driving by sodium matchlight!

I did think about going a naughty 110w upgrade to the H3s in lieu of (very helpful on country lane) fog lights. If one shits itself I will change the lot.

As discussed with a few chums the other day, I think a nice A2 is probably a decent enough thing to have on the fleet. I resent it because it's cost me a lot of money and a usually diligent bloke has had his pants around his ankles a couple of times in the last year. It's my fault alone, but quite a bitter pill to swallow.

31,347 · February 4

3 hours ago, SiC said:

A2: (1600 miles / 60mpg) * 4.54 * £1.42p/l = £171.95

Saab 9-5: (1600 miles / 28mpg) * 4.54 * £1.39p/l = £358.01

Difference of £186.06 in like a month-ish of use. So you've got like another 8 months of use and it'll break even on fuel with it, if you call it's current value as £750.

Whether a 22+ year old Audi will last that time without making another repair bill is another matter though.

Saab never gets below 35mpg, but I get what you mean.

35,110 · February 26

St Neots used to have a lovely, grand old Post Office. So large in fact, that it now houses a vast Wetherspoons with approximately 100 tables in it and a few decorative (but authentic) post boxes set into the walls as a nod to the past.

Scarily, it's been closed nearly 19 years. After that, it moved into the local shop on the High Street, albeit still with three serving positions and the ability to do everything. A couple of years ago, the shop became a 'Morrisons Daily' and, whilst the counter was the same, it was one member of staff for the entire day.

On Monday I went in, and it's now just a tiny booth right next to the tills which causes carnage.

Anyway, I digress. The purpose of my visit wasn't leisure, but to change the taxation class of the Mini from PLG to HISTORIC. "No can do" says the lady. Now, I've had this before so pressed her to do it again and go through the options, but only DISABLED was showing as an option.

I called DVLA and, despite the website saying:

DVLA are adamant that they can't do it.

(My vehicle, for record, was registered on the 5th January 1984.)

So. Why can't they help? Because, apparently, they DO know when my vehicle was built.

I asked, most passively aggressively, the lady on the phone:

"Can I ask a question?"

Yes.

"How can a car be built 11 months after it was first registered?"

(Awkward silence)

I will ask a colleague.

In essence, because there's a build date on there, they're unwilling to change it. Because they don't KNOW when the car was built, they enter the last day of that year. It doesn't really matter because the car will definitely be tax free from April. I'm also not autistic or furious enough to start some sort of fucking war with them. Instead, I'll pay my £15 or whatever to use it in March and then try again in April. They reassured me that, by then, it'll be easy. If not, a trip to the records library with a pencil (you're not allowed pens in there!) and a camera will hopefully get me the evidence required. I doubt I'll need to though.

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