The grumpy thread

[Zelandeth]

Bah!

 

How can so much goop come from the sinuses of one person who has the cold?!? It really doesn't seem physically possible.

[LightBulbFun]

Bah!

 

How can so much goop come from the sinuses of one person who has the cold?!? It really doesn't seem physically possible.

 

the fun starts when toilet roll fails to cope so you switch to kitchen roll and end up making your nose really sore....

[New POD]

Parcel Force attempted delivery of parcel Wednesday

Note left - will redeliver tomorrow

I wasn't in, phoned to ask why not left with neighbour etc

'Neighbours must have refused/not in'

No, they're all retired & we all take parcels for each other

'Parcel will be redelivered Thursday'

I won't be in - leave it with neighbours or deliver Friday

'OK - I've made a note'

Delivery attempted Thursday - I wasn't in & it wasn't left

Note left - returned to depot

I phoned, asked the same questions, it'll be delivered Friday

Waited in all morning - checked tracking - returned to sender

Phoned, Why did you do that - see previous conversations

'It's because you refused delivery'

When did I do that? See previous conversations

'Ah'

'I can arrange delivery for tomorrow Saturday'

I won't be in, how about Monday

'No problem'

Great, give me your managers name & direct telephone number

Ian Healey probably won't be thrilled if he finds out that his number 01159807808

has been posted on the internet for every fucking bot out there to pick up and spam.

 

Perhaps he'll deliver my fucking parcel & I'll edit this post.

 

What a total shower of shit, every other parcel company can manage to deliver to me.

Even Hermes & Yodel.

Quoted so you can't. ( edit it) lol

[Mrcento]

Quoted so you can't. ( edit it) lol

 

Top tip

 

Look for a couple of ridiculous cars on EBay or Gumtree (3 is the optimum, 1 super expensive, 1 boggo average, 1 super cheap to ensure you get every company available interested), Go to a couple of price comparison websites, gets some insurance quotes on said cars, being sure to enter "the targets" name and phone number, make extra sure you've selected that you're happy to be contacted by phone.

 

Your work is done.

 

Months of multiple calls a day to said number calling about "discussing that quote on your Buggatti". Followed by months of PPI chasers and "calling to discuss that accident we have on our records you were not at fault in".

[dozeydustman]

Bah!

 

How can so much goop come from the sinuses of one person who has the cold?!? It really doesn't seem physically possible.

 

 

Sounds more like sinusitis than a cold if you have the major snots.

 

Got any Olbas oil or Vicks? Boil kettle, pour into bowl and add a drop or 2 of oil or a nice dollop of Vicks. head over bowl, cover yourself with a towel & Inhale the steam, nose will start to clear. Every now and then place a hot damp flannel over the bridge of your nose to help ease the pain of sinus inflammation. Clinical studies have proven Eucalyptus to help relieve the symptoms and clear the infection quicker.

[fairkens]

I find brandy helps for sinusitis. Drink it, snort it, rub it on your face, whatever flicks your switch

[dozeydustman]

I find brandy helps for sinusitis. Drink it, snort it, rub it on your face, whatever flicks your switch

 

 

Port & brandy works even better!

[dollywobbler]

Sounds more like sinusitis than a cold if you have the major snots.

 

Got any Olbas oil or Vicks? Boil kettle, pour into bowl and add a drop or 2 of oil or a nice dollop of Vicks. head over bowl, cover yourself with a towel & Inhale the steam, nose will start to clear. Every now and then place a hot damp flannel over the bridge of your nose to help ease the pain of sinus inflammation. Clinical studies have proven Eucalyptus to help relieve the symptoms and clear the infection quicker.

 

It's just part of this cold. I'm just trying to get over it myself. On Wednesday, it was running out of me like very warm 5w30.

[fairkens]

Port & brandy works even better!

Shaken or stirred?

[dozeydustman]

Shaken or stirred?

 

 

Either/or. Makes no difference. Tastes good

[Tadhg Tiogar]

 

 

Sounds more like sinusitis than a cold if you have the major snots.

 

Got any Olbas oil or Vicks? Boil kettle, pour into bowl and add a drop or 2 of oil or a nice dollop of Vicks. head over bowl, cover yourself with a towel & Inhale the steam, nose will start to clear. Every now and then place a hot damp flannel over the bridge of your nose to help ease the pain of sinus inflammation. Clinical studies have proven Eucalyptus to help relieve the symptoms and clear the infection quicker.

I find brandy helps for sinusitis. Drink it, snort it, rub it on your face, whatever flicks your switch

 

Port & brandy works even better!

 

I find that a good hot vegetable curry helps open the pores and really makes you sweat it out. Just as effective as the usual medical / chemical-based remedies.

[Pillock]

I've got some Methanol Crystals... A sprinkle in hot water in a jug and hold your head over it makes you suddenly VERY clear.

 

I always forget what it's called though and can be found in the supermarket looking for "crystal meth".

[Kiltox]

I've got some Methanol Crystals... A sprinkle in hot water in a jug and hold your head over it makes you suddenly VERY clear.

 

I always forget what it's called though and can be found in the supermarket looking for "crystal meth".

Menthol crystals no?

[Guest Hooli]

I've just paid over £100 to the ministry of injustice after a lying bastard copper in september pretended my speed was a lot higher than it was. No point arguing it though as he'd just lie in court, get believed & it'd cost me even more. I found that out years ago last time one fined me for a fabricated offence.

 

I hate living in a 3rd world country at times, who remembers days when plod could be trusted to try & do the right thing?

[HillmanImp]

Just took the carpets out of the GT6 and put it back on its side again. Now, where did i put my safety glasses.....

 

 

Fucksticks.

 

 

*edit* I managed to open the door and reach around... Ooh matron

[Tadhg Tiogar]

I've just paid over £100 to the ministry of injustice after a lying bastard copper in september pretended my speed was a lot higher than it was. No point arguing it though as he'd just lie in court, get believed & it'd cost me even more. I found that out years ago last time one fined me for a fabricated offence.

 

I hate living in a 3rd world country at times, who remembers days when plod could be trusted to try & do the right thing?

 

Hardly surprising when their funding seems to have been cut in real terms. The money has to come from somewhere. Unfortunately 'tis you and me....

[xtriple]

That old fuck Ron has just been round - 'Is Besse with you?'

 

No.

 

She's been gone an hour before he's bothered to try and find her, obviously wanted me to go out searching for her, but it's not happening. I have no idea where to start looking for one thing! A sodding hour! I really fear for that dog.

[Pillock]

Menthol crystals no?

Ha yeah exactly those.

[Bren]

I have two inoperative locks on the passat with neither the time nor inclination to fix myself. Cue ££££.

[stonedagain]

I have two inoperative locks on the passat with neither the time nor inclination to fix myself. Cue ££££.

Have they deadlocked themselves? VW's have a habit of doing that.....

[Bren]

Not yet - rear n/s will not lock with the fob. Drivers door closes on the first catch but will not close well enough to seal.

[richardmorris]

That old fuck Ron has just been round - 'Is Besse with you?'

 

No.

 

She's been gone an hour before he's bothered to try and find her, obviously wanted me to go out searching for her, but it's not happening. I have no idea where to start looking for one thing! A sodding hour! I really fear for that dog.

 

The only issue I have with people keeping animals as pets is their owners!

[stonedagain]

Not yet - rear n/s will not lock with the fob. Drivers door closes on the first catch but will not close well enough to seal.

There's a control unit under the passenger side front carpet. Passats love to piss water into the footwell via the pollen filter housing seal or blocked drains in the plenum.

[Timewaster]

lying bastard copper.

 

 

who remembers days when plod could be trusted to try & do the right thing?

Nobody. Always been bad eggs in uniform the same as the have always been some brilliant coppers.

 

I remember anecdotal stories from the 70s of the local plod who's response to crime was to beat up the suspects down an alleyway.

 

Not a bad idea if they actually did it but I don't think that bothered the copper too much.

[Lacquer Peel]

There's a control unit under the passenger side front carpet. Passats love to piss water into the footwell via the pollen filter housing seal or blocked drains in the plenum.

Also via the A/C condensor pipe.

[Frogchod]

The French sure know how to protest. My local town is empty, everybody has stayed at home to avoid the blockades.

Elsewhere in France it's not gone so well with several injuries and sadly one death

[richardmorris]

The French sure know how to protest. My local town is empty, everybody has stayed at home to avoid the blockades.

Elsewhere in France it's not gone so well with several injuries and sadly one death

Ah, the yellow vests!

No one knows how to protest like the French. It’s why they’re no longer ruled by louis Philippe the 34th.

[richardmorris]

Went out earlier to post a couple of cards -hopped on the bike, down the path to the bottom gate ( my neighbour calls it the M&S gate as it’s opposite the shop, but strictly speaking it’s the station lodge gate). Left the bike, unlocked gate and walked through to the post box and back home. Never left the estate for more than 100m and all in about 6mins. In that time someone has hit the back of the Mercedes bumper leaving a six inch scuff. No neighbours in or out in that time, so obviously a delivery driver.

The only consolation is that it’s going in for some paint and a full polish in a fortnight, so hopefully they can fix it- I tried, but the patch is supposed to be matt not gloss, so overpolishing will make it worse.

[Ghosty]

Royal Mail.

 

Get a package slip at 1pm, having lunch.

 

read it, £13 to pay on what's presumably a Rock Auto package.

Delivery office open til 2 it says - one town over, better go. Finish eating, chuck a fiver of petrol in the Civic, get there at about 1:40.

Council has changed all the free parking in the town to paid.

Pay by app or text only. FRO, I'm parked at the door to the delivery office and the queue is fifteen people out of it, sod paying, I'll just fuck off if das Parkenstasi come. Either that or claim my phone's dead (just install meters you cheapskate cashgrabbers).
15 minutes in the queue, hand over the slip, card in hand.

'It's cash only, we don't have a card machine. Is that a problem?' 

Yes it fucking is, I've queued up for 15 minutes and nowhere at all did it say you don't take card. How fucking daft is that? You have barcode scanners and little electronic signature things, but a card machine? Oh no, we don't have that... 'You could go and get cash and come back?' Aye but you close in five minutes and I don't know where there's a cash machine within two, and there's another ten plus people queuing up behind me. Besides, no money on the debit card, and can't withdraw on the credit card as it incurs fees.

'You can pay online?'

'Ah, I'll do that then'

'...and we'll deliver it to you in 2-3 days.'

BUT I'M HERE NOW!

Dumb fuckers. Complaint on the way for that. Is it not reasonable to expect being able to pay my not insignificant customs fees by card at a delivery office that regularly handles such queries?

[Wack]

Approached the cornish pasty stand at Preston station to take advantage of their £3.99 pasty of the month and a coffee offer

 

Spent £7.65