The grumpy thread

[nigel bickle]

I think there is more of us, than you realise, both here, and in the ' real world'.

 

I recognised, in my early teens, that no one gave a flying f*ck about me, despite my caring, listening nature.

I'm not clever, so reasoned that to obtain munns, I had to do stuff no one else would. I think that probably still applies?

 

At 17, I was a dental assistant in an asylum, permanently carrying a stout broom whereever I went.

After the initial horror of the keys, prison- like doors clanging, aggression & lunacy etc, I found I could live it. Progression meant I moved on to a factory catering facility, briefly, before going down the sewers,& drains.

That was fun....

 

However, it did give me sufficient disposable to do as I pleased, reasonably, so I put up with it till such time as I had a head of steam.

I'm pleased I did it, gave me a good insight into people, and their motives. I found most are greedy, self centred and spineless; the few ' decent' ones shone through- like a light. I was attracted to them , tried to learn to be like them, to grow up a better person. It worked, a bit..

 

Now, daily, everyone lies, tries to mug me ( financially) & I'm surrounded by cut throat spivs.

 

But, I'm my own boss, answer to no one but me. I can make my own decisions, I decide what and when to do, health permitting.

 

I'm old, I still suffer the same self doubt, potential loathing etc, that you do ( I suspect) and am in constant pain, mollified with oramorph, but have the security of a f*ck you stance.

 

So, earn yourself that,money; doing ever/ whatever it takes; then guard it jealously.

You will see the world as a totally different place, with the ability to progress with some choice.

 

And people will be nice to you.

[Cheggers]

I think the fear of being "found out" at work is fairly common. I have it too and I'm sure others will admit to the same feelings.

 

 

Absolutely right. I've not contributed to this as I'm probably one of those well-off, "successful", largely happy people that quite rightly piss you off.

 

I, too, have the fear of being found out at work, despite being in a fairly senior position...

 

Sent from my SM-N910F using Tapatalk

 

 

[fairkens]

What pbk said,don't ignore this it will hold you back forever

[Captain Furious]

Sad to read that people are so down on themselves and life. I know where you're coming from, because I've been there, I've been through some dark times in life where I really just couldn't take it any more, I was so down on everything that the thought of having to carry on like that with no foreseeable way out gave me what I can only describe as panic attacks. I even emailed the Samaritans at one stage because I had no-one I felt I could turn to (don't bother btw, unless you just wanna be told to see your GP) These feelings came and went in 'waves' long periods of lows interspersed with the occasional high for as long as I can remember certainly throughout most of my 20's and early 30's (I'm now 36)

 

So, did I find a cure? Do I have the golden ticket answer to happiness and freedom? Well, no, the sad truth is I don't think there is one, I made a few changes in life, cut down drinking, did some professional qualifications, got a new job, tried to give myself something to focus my mind and fill my time, something I could get a sense of achievement out of, none of it made a difference really though, short term highs to mask much deeper rooted problems.

 

In the end I just learned to cope with it better, got to know the triggers that sent me spiralling into depression mode and how to deal with it better when it came. Now the highs and lows continue, but the low times are less frequent and shorter lived so they don't feel like they dominate my life. But I know that tomorrow I could be back right where I started, I still wake up in inexplicable low moods that I can't snap out of and think 'uh oh'

[Negative Creep]

Our company is going under and I'll be out of a job by August, but the whole procedure is such a shambles we have no idea how long our particular department will be active for. So every day I turn up not knowing if it will be my last. Management have been very much conspicuous by their absence. Until yesterday, when the person in charge walked onto our floor for the first time in months - to see if his fancy dress costume had been delivered because the company was throwing a party in London.

Still, at least he can still go as a giant knob.

[Mr A Lawrence]

I think the fear of being "found out" at work is fairly common. I have it too and I'm sure others will admit to the same feelings.

Me too and I don't work*

[Cavcraft]

Easy to say as everyone is different, but if you still working somewhere then 1) you must be doing something right and 2) you might just as well stay on the train, so to speak, as whatever you did to get the gig clearly has worked and still is.

 

Another outlook, the one I choose anyhow, is that if they haven't twigged yet I'm just going to laugh to myself as I mugged them off and they didn't see through it, so it's their problem, not mine. Make hay while the sun shines,

[Captain Furious]

Oh fuck work, that's one lesson I have well and truly learned, spent 7 years at my last place working my balls off, giving up my weekends and free time for the sake of the company in the mistaken belief it would somehow be recognised. Net result was that it got me precisely nowhere. I was on exactly the same shit pile as every other lazy cunt who didn't give a shit

 

At the new job it's bare minimum to get by, they employ me for what I know and the occasional time that my skills and knowledge get them out of the shit. And I go there because they pay me a wage. No allegiances.

[Cavcraft]

That's why I don't get it when people say football players and the like are disloyal when they leave a well paid 'job' to do the same elsewhere for more money. Well, my company trained me to do what I do and if another lot came long and offered to double or treble my wages for doing exactly the same thing you wouldn't see me for dust. There aren't many loyalties that I can see in the working persons world, so get what you can and bollocks to them.

[jakebullet]

Just when you think idiot sister can't get any more stupid she does.

 

She's currently in Cyprus for a 'right keg'. She has decided by the diagnostic power of taking selfies of her eye that there is something wrong with it.

 

Should she:

 

A ) Go to an optician / hospital and get it checked out.

or

B ) Book an easyjet flight to east midlands, then get a taxi to Sheffield A&E?

 

She has of course gone for B. Can't do A 'cos it's their holy day in Cyprus and nobody is open and they don't speak English anyway. B is totally safer, and she's read on the internet there's nothing can go possibly wrong if she just hops on a plane.

[cort1977]

Fear of being found out at work is a thing that has been identified and studied - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impostor_syndrome

.   It says that it affects successful people  .

 

In my experience hard work and doing extra for a company will never be recognized by management so you should absolutely do your best but only for the hours you are paid.   I've been a mercenary contractor for ten years and would recommend it to anybody.

[MarvinsMom]

i am shit at my job, and one day my work will find out just how high the levels of incompetence, ineptitude and general nincompoopery are at my work station.

 

this after been put on"the naughty step" next to the boss severla months ago. now other than speaking to Jo the cleaner, no one speaks to me during the day (generally)

 

i said when i took the job that it will last as long as it lasts. and that was nearly 5 years ago.

[purplebargeken]

Bit mean that no-one speaks to you (apart from Jo).

[eddyramrod]

I'm very good at my job, and I enjoy doing it, but I still suffer savage bouts of "when are they going to find out?"  It doesn't help that my boss is an arse who believes in living to work, and I'm trying (unsuccessfully) to keep my hours below a benefit threshold.  It's a job that isn't recognised as skilled in any way, yet anyone doing it (properly) will tell you that not just "anyone" can do it.  It's all I've ever really wanted to do.  The pay is lousy (minimum wage) and I'm treated like shit by all and sundry, but I still love it and always will.

I was 38 when I met and married MrsR.  She's my first wife.  I was beginning to think I was destined to live alone, but apparently not.  I'm selfish, childish and untidy, you want to talk about self-esteem?  Please do, I have none.  But, I know I'm a nice bloke really, which is the result of positive effort on my part, I try to treat everyone as I'd like them to treat me.  Occasionally it works.

[Timewaster]

Rhod Gilbert did a stand up routine about suffering "Imposter Syndrome" , the feeling that you shouldn't be where you are and will get found out anytime.

Being at work and getting a tap on the shoulder and told "What are you doing here, you're no bloody good, sling your hook!"

 

I think it's more common than we expect.

[Craig the Princess]

If my old office based employers every realised how little I did they would get a massive shock. That said I was still in the to 20% productivity wise but that didn't stop that fear of being found out.

 

Captain 70s, you have loads of talent. Those cartoon style car pictures are amazing. I can barely draw curtains.

[Tamworthbay]

I seem to have come across more that are examples of the Peter principle. One in particular springs to mind, since she has left everything has been so much better, people are happier, everything g is more efficient and £70k isn't being peed up the wall on a salary for making things worse,

[eddyramrod]

Rhod Gilbert did a stand up routine about suffering "Imposter Syndrome" , the feeling that you shouldn't be where you are and will get found out anytime.

Being at work and getting a tap on the shoulder and told "What are you doing here, you're no bloody good, sling your hook!"

 

I think it's more common than we expect.

It's actually got a name???  Excellent!  I've had it most of my adult life.

[jakebullet]

I'm finding the 'will get found out' thing also extends to the relationship thing. I think a lot kinky girl could do so much better, and maybe one day soon she'll realise I'm a no hope gimp. She must also be thinking something, as she tells me I'll be wanting a younger model.

[ruffgeezer]

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGH

[Captain Furious]

Got to be honest the whole 'get found out' thing is totally new on me, I've never worried that work are suddenly going to 'out me' as a serial Internet forum browser and fire me

 

Although the only thing currently on my agenda tomorrow is to read the 32 page thread on trucks. So maybe tomorrow is the day

[wuvvum]

I don't seem to suffer much with depression or low self esteem, which is strange given that I am 36, terminally single and still pretty much living paycheque to paycheque (although that's partly self-inflicted as any time I do have a bit of spare cash put by I'll go out and spend it on chod, which I then invariably make a massive loss on).  I think this might be down to the fact that I don't think about the future.  At all.  Apart from a visit to a client in Sussex next week, Shitefest in June and a visit to my parents in July, I have absolutely nothing planned beyond this week.  In fact it's quite frequent for me to have no firm plans at all beyond the end of the day.  I have fleeting thoughts about how it'd be nice to be able to buy a house, and occasionally I have fleeting worries about what will happen if I have to move, but generally I just live in the moment.  I've noticed it when I'm on collection missions as well - I won't be worrying about the drive home, I won't be thinking further ahead than the next change of train.  I don't know if this is healthy or not, but it seems to have kept any signs of the "black dog" at bay so far.

[purplebargeken]

Hayfever, you can fuck off too with your sneezing, itchy eyes and shit. Just FRO!

[chaseracer]

I seem to have come across more that are examples of the Peter principle...

 

Unsurprisingly, I see this a lot in my line of work...

[chaseracer]

Don't worry about the whole impostor syndrome thing, you don't have to be smarter than everyone, just the management.

 

Which is not, generally speaking, too difficult.

 

Being more cunning, vindictive, venal and just plain stupid than a significant minority of them is a matter of personal choice - or temporary requirement.

 

[daveb47]

Had bad angina for 2 days now,my appointment with heart specialist is not till 28 june.

[Doctormop]

I heard a quote once along the lines that "I am crippled with low self esteem and thus impossible to insult as nobody can have a lower opinion of me than I have of myself" if this is true then I have been impossible to insult since infant school.

 I have been in the same job for 8 years and pretty much hated the last 7 but somehow having been here longer than many no one seems to notice that I don't really know what I'm supposed to be doing most of the time, last Friday I handed in my notice, can't cope with the 90 mile per day commute anymore not to mention the people I have to deal with on a daily basis, I have got a job paying much less but only 10 minutes walk from home, its just over minimum wage but full time and permanent so I consider myself very fortunate to have been offered it, I really intend to make the best of this and not get bored, pissed off and lazy after a fortnight like I have done with every other job I have had, in my twenties I was known as cannonball because I was always getting fired!

 Other grumps include seeing a sign outside a house yesterday saying "Ears and tongues pierced, babies welcome" I am not a parent myself so please correct me if I'm wrong but would anyone want their baby to go through that?

[UltraWomble]

THIS really pisses me off:

 

Plus 60 pounds documentation fee, Bill Smith Motors Celebrating over 50 years in Business!, £2,195 p/x welcome

On a second hand bike.

£60? for what? An envelope and a stamp?

FRO.

[adw1977]

Car Giant have being doing a £200 admin fee for years.

[Guest Hooli]

 Other grumps include seeing a sign outside a house yesterday saying "Ears and tongues pierced, babies welcome" I am not a parent myself so please correct me if I'm wrong but would anyone want their baby to go through that?

 

Child abuse in my eyes.