The grumpy thread

23,641 · May 9, 2015

Have spent the WHOLE FUCKING DAY trying to get a ball joint off the Volvo. It WILL NOT FUCKING BUDGE!

I am doing it on my tod and so decided to use a three pronged pulley puller but it could not break it, it would work to a point but the breaking point of the pullers grip was less than that of the ball joint. So I jacked it up from the bottom and smashed the living shit out of it for about half an hour with two large hammers but that did not budge it. So I went to Machine Mart and got a proper tool for doing it and all that did was go straight through the metal where the thread is leaving a mushy lump that I cant get the bolt back onto now, so will have to sort that out before I take it to the garage to put the new ones on for me, as I have had it and given up.

My abstinence from booze whilst I did the GT6 is about to cease. I could have spent the whole day finishing off the GT6 but instead spent it screaming like a lunatic at a Volvo.

28,547 · May 9, 2015

whoop whoop

It's da sound of da police.

18,091 · May 9, 2015

Have spent the WHOLE FUCKING DAY trying to get a ball joint off the Volvo. It WILL NOT FUCKING BUDGE!

I am doing it on my tod and so decided to use a three pronged pulley puller but it could not break it, it would work to a point but the breaking point of the pullers grip was less than that of the ball joint. So I jacked it up from the bottom and smashed the living shit out of it for about half an hour with two large hammers but that did not budge it. So I went to Machine Mart and got a proper tool for doing it and all that did was go straight through the metal where the thread is leaving a mushy lump that I cant get the bolt back onto now, so will have to sort that out before I take it to the garage to put the new ones on for me, as I have had it and given up.

My abstinence from booze whilst I did the GT6 is about to cease. I could have spent the whole day finishing off the GT6 but instead spent it screaming like a lunatic at a Volvo.

fuckin' cars, i hate em (sometimes) cos this is me attempting some "simple" job that turns out to be a goddamned nightmare....

5,965 · May 9, 2015

Have spent the WHOLE FUCKING DAY trying to get a ball joint off the Volvo. It WILL NOT FUCKING BUDGE!

I am doing it on my tod and so decided to use a three pronged pulley puller but it could not break it, it would work to a point but the breaking point of the pullers grip was less than that of the ball joint. So I jacked it up from the bottom and smashed the living shit out of it for about half an hour with two large hammers but that did not budge it. So I went to Machine Mart and got a proper tool for doing it and all that did was go straight through the metal where the thread is leaving a mushy lump that I cant get the bolt back onto now, so will have to sort that out before I take it to the garage to put the new ones on for me, as I have had it and given up.

My abstinence from booze whilst I did the GT6 is about to cease. I could have spent the whole day finishing off the GT6 but instead spent it screaming like a lunatic at a Volvo.

I'm a totally unreliable useless git but don't do shit on your own. Give me a set time and date and I'll be there to help*

Saying that I'm on holiday for a week soon

6,721 · May 9, 2015

Have spent the WHOLE FUCKING DAY trying to get a ball joint off the Volvo. It WILL NOT FUCKING BUDGE!

I am doing it on my tod and so decided to use a three pronged pulley puller but it could not break it, it would work to a point but the breaking point of the pullers grip was less than that of the ball joint. So I jacked it up from the bottom and smashed the living shit out of it for about half an hour with two large hammers but that did not budge it. So I went to Machine Mart and got a proper tool for doing it and all that did was go straight through the metal where the thread is leaving a mushy lump that I cant get the bolt back onto now, so will have to sort that out before I take it to the garage to put the new ones on for me, as I have had it and given up.

My abstinence from booze whilst I did the GT6 is about to cease. I could have spent the whole day finishing off the GT6 but instead spent it screaming like a lunatic at a Volvo.

Have you tried the cure-all of Doctor Heat?

^^^ I love how this is a shutterstock image!

20,802 · May 9, 2015

There's been a whoop whoop noise from the Fiesta ST for a bit from the back. I said it must be a bearing as one has already been changed.
Take it to college, up on ramp, spin wheels, rag them about, nothing. Get the tutor to check he can't find anything either.
WWife still not happy (she's obsessed her car makes no weird noises) took it to the garage we always use just to check.
That'll be Ã‚Â£240 for a back bearing and 2 new tyres please... Should have been 3 but I saved one. NSR tyre was deformed and the tracking was off scuffing the front. Although it's really nice to drive the very hard suspension and shitty roads don't go well together

Whoop Whoop? Does it think it's the QE2?

23,641 · May 9, 2015

Have you tried the cure-all of Doctor Heat?

^^^ I love how this is a shutterstock image!

My torch had no gas in it. I was rampaging in the garage looking for that gas canister I knew I had, when I suddenly remembered where I thought it was. I rang up Volksy and its in Sheffield, in the glove compartment of the Shaguar. It was on my list of things to do but wifey was oot so I just put it back together and sacked it off.

53,448 · May 9, 2015

Whoever decided to hide the ugly repairs on the Lancia with filler. So much filler. *cries*

5,965 · May 9, 2015

Whoop Whoop? Does it think it's the QE2?

No its an ungrateful shit that eats tyres

6,277 · May 9, 2015

My sister is so dense I can't believe a black hole doesn't form around her.

Before she was dumped by previous man for being a psycho bitch she bought 2 tickets to foo fighters. She now wants rid as she doesn't even remotely like them. But she's not putting them on stubhub "because they charge to sell and they cost me over Ã‚Â£100".

So how are you going to sell them?

"I've put them on my facebook page"

That's going to work really well given your friends are also in Barnsley and you have tickets for Sunderland.

"They cost me over Ã‚Â£100"

So given the choice of getting back whatever she can on stubhub, or leaving them on a shelf because they cost over Ã‚Â£100, she's going for shelf. Maybe she's adopted.

5,774 · May 9, 2015

Sciatica-ah-ah-ah-ouch!!! Or piriformis syndrome or some other kind bum stabby leg numby knee achey thing.

OW.

6,721 · May 9, 2015

My torch had no gas in it. I was rampaging in the garage looking for that gas canister I knew I had, when I suddenly remembered where I thought it was. I rang up Volksy and its in Sheffield, in the glove compartment of the Shaguar. It was on my list of things to do but wifey was oot so I just put it back together and sacked it off.

If it's screw-on, most are of a certain size. I've used camping gas canisters on the blowtorch and vice-versa in the past. I've also used meths and the like in a cut-down food can to provide heat when needed.

6,621 · May 9, 2015

I ended up pulling the ads for my polo (will prob stick on eBay shortly) as all I got was bloody texts,not even an email. Always the same. Text 1: is the polo still for sale mate. Text 2: what's the lowest you will take for it. Umm,clues in the fucking advert!

6,201 · May 9, 2015

Changed my rear number plate today. Volvo have thoughtfully fitted captive nuts in the boot lid, for mounting the plate. Had they been used? Predictably, no. Dirty great big patches of rust where the self-tappers had been lazily poked in. Bastards.

19,699 · May 10, 2015

Went to wales for a nimble

This is as far as I got

Didn't make it inside......

130,931 · May 10, 2015

The cocky wanker driving a coach through Chester this morning. You'll have a crash one day driving like that, you silly little twat.

6,277 · May 10, 2015

Arse biscuits. Just had a look round the disco as 1 month of mot left, and the chassis is fucked at the back. Not mega fucked, two 6 inch plates will fix it, but prolly be a ball ache dropping the tank to do it.

Think I'm officially going to claim old man status and let friendly* mechanic do it.

May 10, 2015

DVLA. Balls balls balls

Sent a V5 of sold vehicule recorded delivery (not traceable when lost and only deemed lost after 375 thousand years) instead of special delivery (traceable every step of the way and found instantly when even three minutes late.)

Its lost.

I will now get fined for every concievable motoring offence possible that will now be committed by the new owner. Every friggin time. Without fail. I keep forgetting that "signed for" means nothing at DVLA. Balls balls balls. and more balls.

Still, at least the DVLA will be a bit better off cos they sure are not refunding my tax. Got to look on the bright side. Bar Stewards.

9,452 · May 10, 2015

DVLA. Balls balls balls

Sent a V5 of sold vehicule recorded delivery (not traceable when lost and only deemed lost after 375 thousand years) instead of special delivery (traceable every step of the way and found instantly when even three minutes late.)

Its lost.

I will now get fined for every concievable motoring offence possible that will now be committed by the new owner. Every friggin time. Without fail. I keep forgetting that "signed for" means nothing at DVLA. Balls balls balls. and more balls.

Still, at least the DVLA will be a bit better off cos they sure are not refunding my tax. Got to look on the bright side. Bar Stewards.

On the positive side you do have proof of posting it and when, so if they try to fine you just take it to court and produce the recipt then ask for Ã‚Â£Ã‚Â£Ã‚Â£Ã‚Â£Ã‚Â£ expenses.

4,737 · May 10, 2015

^ This, your liability ends when you put it in the red box, as long as you keep your proof of posting. I'm sure Nigel Bickle will elaborate on claiming back any court-related expenses.

24,008 · May 10, 2015

Idiot this morning on the a319 to Cirencester. Belting up the slip road, so I indicate and move over to the outer lane. He pulls on and accelerates to match my speed. No more, no less. I was in the 2 cv and doing 70, so couldn't accelerate and there was the usual Audi trying to park in the boot. Why do people do this?

19,699 · May 10, 2015

you didnt need to move over - they have to wait for you

people try and do it to wagons

they fail

9,708 · May 10, 2015

Idiot this morning on the a319 to Cirencester. Belting up the slip road, so I indicate and move over to the outer lane. He pulls on and accelerates to match my speed. No more, no less. I was in the 2 cv and doing 70, so couldn't accelerate and there was the usual Audi trying to park in the boot. Why do people do this?

I get this all the time in my work van which is limited, does my head in

1,770 · May 10, 2015

Tyre expense continues!

After two flats in the Merc and a knackered alloy, plus two new tyres in the 126, the Dispatch decided to lose a chunk of tread off one of its rears on the M4 on Friday - then one of the wheels of the sack truck gives up the ghost too - Machine mart, try spending a teeny bit more on your tyres for your trolleys as they are fucking shit! Just as well I have learned and always carry a spare!

Fitted the new alloys I picked up on Saturday though and they look brilliant! I have three on but have to take the fourth (the one with the slow puncture) down to the tyre place to get the nail removed, and puncture repaired (or maybe just get the brand new tyre they have fitted to it). Mercedes, why do you have the same design (fitted as standard to run out models) in 8J on the saloon but 7.5J on the estate?

With luck tomorrow will be the end of tyre woes for a while.

Good news, though, the garage reseated the steel wheel's tyre and it is holding air again!

6,277 · May 10, 2015

The duo won best entertainment show and best entertainment performance for their ITV show Saturday Night Takeaway.

Ant & Dec. ANT AND FUCKING DEC ARE ENTERTAINMENT? IN WHICH UNIVERSE?

62,787 · May 10, 2015

I was driving up the A1 yesterday in the Mondeo and spotted an interesting cloud formation. So I pulled out my phone and took a pic. Just downloaded the pics from the phone, and the camera has focused on the fucking heated windscreen elements and completely missed the cloud. How does it miss a cumulus a mile wide to focus on something the width of a hair? Useless poxy thing.

27,158 · May 10, 2015

The cocky wanker driving a coach through Chester this morning. You'll have a crash one day driving like that, you silly little twat.

Cms206 down to get a punto?

8,930 · May 10, 2015

The duo won best entertainment show and best entertainment performance for their ITV show Saturday Night Takeaway.

Ant & Dec. ANT AND FUCKING DEC ARE ENTERTAINMENT? IN WHICH UNIVERSE?

ITV Universe - where folk openly cry when told they cant sing/dance/ spin on a fucking uni cycle whilst fingering a parrot ...And need life long counseling afterwards - Fucktards

47,365 · May 10, 2015

Ooooohhhhh!!!

8,930 · May 11, 2015

Ohhhhh ! +1

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