The grumpy thread

[TimothyClaypole]

Cats.

 

I know there are cat people on here and I general just let the ones around here get along but I'm currently engaged in digging a "big hole/grave" in the back garden.

 

 

I don't even mind if they shit there, I'll shovel it into the dustbin and the binmen can rake through it if they fancy. 

 

 

BUT don't do a soft light brown shit in the hole then scrape over it so the first I know of it is when I feel sick from the stink as I mash it up in my rotary sieve.  

 

 

(I'm sieving the soil as it's a mixture of soil/crushed sandstone from an old garage base and sub soil so by sieving it I can put it on Freecycle as sieved/bagged soil and not have to pay £110 a skip so the skip company can sell it on for £40 a ton). 

 

[EssDeeWon]

NowTV

 

I paid £6.99 for 24 hours of Sky Sports on Sunday because I was bored and I fancied watching the Liverpool v Man U game

 

Today two lots of £6.99 are taken from my bank account, and can I get hold of them to get my money back? Can I fuck! Well sod em, I have cancelled my Sky Movies subscription saving me a tenner a month. I bet that gets their attention, im now awaiting the phone call begging me to re-subscribe again.

[DS20]

I really wish Mercedes weren't so mean with their standard equipment - you'd think that indicators would be automatically included on 64-plate Mercedes commercial vehicles, wouldn't you?  After all, only an idiot wouldn't use indicators when turning right lurching across the flow of oncoming traffic, wouldn't they?  

[twosmoke300]

Appears to be a problem with all German cars and some vauxhall agilas

[MarvinsMom]

the hun don't bother with indicators cos they would only cause confusion when invading someone else's country.

[gordonbennet]

NowTV

 

I paid £6.99 for 24 hours of Sky Sports on Sunday because I was bored and I fancied watching the Liverpool v Man U game

 

Today two lots of £6.99 are taken from my bank account, and can I get hold of them to get my money back? Can I fuck! Well sod em, I have cancelled my Sky Movies subscription saving me a tenner a month. I bet that gets their attention, im now awaiting the phone call begging me to re-subscribe again.

 

best of luck with getting shot of them, never again as long as we bloody live, fuckin leeches...SWMBO ended up having to send emails to someone highup complaining about harrassment, that was the only way to get away cos they simply don't listen...it's like the fuckin EU where Ireland had to keep voting till they gave the right answer.

 

should have known what it would be like having been the victims of NTL's customer disservice before.

[Madmick]

I once dug out a full sized pit in my garage. The neighbours kept popping round to ask what I was doing so I had a plaque made that read " Based on an idea by FRED WEST " They laughed a little.

[HH-R]

People sharing Facebook posts with "MASSIVE Facebook giveaway!!! COMMENT/LIKE this post and SHARE with your friends to WIN!!!". "Spam the shit out of your friends!!!", more like. My news feed is now 90% this shite.

[Pillock]

I've come up with a cracking idea. Why not paint lines in the road (say, white ones) that sort of guide you, and stop you from straying where others are already driving.

 

What, that's a thing? I find that hard to believe given how many people just drive where the fuck they like.

 

There's a junction in particular, between Lode Lane and Solihull bus station, that I have to drive with my hand ready to blast the fuck out of the horn because every morning some twat tries to take all the lanes.

[dugong]

Facebook

Yes, I agree.

[outlaw118]

Some generous bastard has given me germs. 

 

Now, under normal circumstances, I can cope with "man-flu", dose up on Beechams or similar, sweat it out.

 

But just the common cold, that's not nearly enough, why not give the fat fuck the shits now too?

 

If I die, I'm leaving my Capri to finance the site.*

 

And the Seat to Billy, so the northern monkey can feel my pain.

 

 

 

*Don't tell Mrs_outlaw

[dome]

Because of this forum I missed my stop on the train. This forum isn't what it used to be etc.

[fred]

I've come up with a cracking idea. Why not paint lines in the road (say, white ones) that sort of guide you, and stop you from straying where others are already driving.

 

What, that's a thing? I find that hard to believe given how many people just drive where the fuck they like.

 

There's a junction in particular, between Lode Lane and Solihull bus station, that I have to drive with my hand ready to blast the fuck out of the horn because every morning some twat tries to take all the lanes.

 

Had a crew putting centre lines down our main road two months ago for the first time in years - last weekend they resurfaced the road - now have no centre lines again .....

[quicksilver]

Been away from my desk for a couple of days being very stressed by the medical school. If I wasn't grumpy enough, I got back to find the maintenance dept had been in and installed partitions no one had asked for on the desks without considering the layout of the other furniture, which was all fine where it is. I was so angry I actually went home to get a screwdriver and remove them but they've buggered a screw head on this one and it won't come out. What a brilliant job - see if you can spot how many problems they've caused by installing the black partition there.

 

[dave21478]

Two days ago I was out wearing just a t-shirt -well, trousers and shoes and stuff too.... you know what I mean- mowing the lawn. Today it is snowing.

[vulgalour]

I cannot attend the 40th birthday do for the Princess at Cowley tomorrow as I have no available time free.

[Cavcraft]

People sharing Facebook posts with "MASSIVE Facebook giveaway!!! COMMENT/LIKE this post and SHARE with your friends to WIN!!!". "Spam the shit out of your friends!!!", more like. My news feed is now 90% this shite.

 

+1

I can't believe people fall for this free advertising/bollocks. 

[chaseracer]

the hun don't bother with indicators cos they would only cause confusion when invading someone else's country.

 

They generally only indicate EAST anyway...

[chaseracer]

The Blingo has decided that it doesn't feel like keeping air in its OS/R tyre.  Can I find the bloody footpump?*

 

 

 

 

* No.

[The Moog]

Decent documentary on dark matter on BBC spoilt by David Mitchell doing the voice over.

 

He always sounds like he is sneering and being patronising. Fine for comedy not for proper stuff

[messerschmitt owner]

+1

I can't believe people fall for this free advertising/bollocks. 

I have joined FB in the past week or so to gain access to some UMM info and tips and some of the people who I am 'friends' with do nothing but post up utter, utter shite - I mean stuff that isn't about cars! What's all that about. Get a life! Write about cars!

 

And that means you, little sister!

[robinmasters]

I've had to move desks at work temporarily, and instead of being in a small, quiet office, I'm in a big room full of people who answer the telephone a lot.

 

That in itself is bad enough, but the worst part is what passes for humour. 90% of the time, a witty, insightful, intelligent response to anything is to sing a line from a song which is loosely related to what the other person said.

 

Every other conversation is a string of unnecessary and often nonsensical idioms. For fuck's sake; there's no need to pad every sentence out with 'at the end of the day's and 'to be fair's. JUST SAY THE FACTS THEN SHUT UP.

[xtriple]

Bloody dog!

 

Took her out today (with Chester of course) to the BIG park and deliberately didn't take a ball as she needs to be quiet and steady.

 

First thing she did when we got there was pinch some other poor dogs ball and refused to give it back and ran around like a mad thing. Now, she's crying every time she moves and won't go out for a wee!

[Station]

Dodgy 4x4 seller near me - bought a second hand speedo drive for the Hilux. "We sell them for 80 quid on ebay, you can have it for £50".

 

Checks ebay a couple of days later - they are brand new for £35! Fucking bullshitting sheister.

[steve_earwig]

Decent documentary on dark matter on BBC spoilt by David Mitchell doing the voice over.

 

He always sounds like he is sneering and being patronising. Fine for comedy not for proper stuff

I watched that, I just thought "that's David Mitchell that is" and thought no more about it. I do enjoy a documentary about people spending years and millions looking for things that probably don't exist.

[hairnet]

dugong mode on

 

work

 

worked tuesday then text off them tues aft to say dont come in today - theres fk all to do (not just me)

 

then another text 3 hours later oh we sent out the wrong tesdt and you and few others were on it come in

 

fine no problem

 

did yesterday and same thing text in after noon dont come in today so planned to go and get ickle monsters for sis at lunchtime

 

woke up this morning and theres a text we've had sickies can ya come in - fine no prob but can only do one round then i need to bugga off - ok we give you two small rounds local to depot

 

they give me local rounds but 2 - tell them i could prolly do 1 (taking 3 hours from 8.30)

 

gets to 11 and say to them i can finish off this round and do a little of the next one as it is continuation of where i was - the two rounds can be a mile apart or more sometimes

 

finished off what i had in me bundle and went back to work at 11.45

 

took the unfinished round out and put it back on the table

 

why you do that

 

you were told at 7.20 i could only help doing 1 - im already later

 

(grumble mutter - then he starts getting on the phone)

 

RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

 

on a day off i do them a favour and they fk me about if itd been the other way round........never woulda heard the end of it...........

 

next time they do that 'can ya come in..........click brrrrrrrrrrr'

 

ickle gits place was helpful they were there 15 mins more so i culd go

 

work

[EssDeeWon]

BBC News this morning, covered the awful plane crash in the alps, then went on to a big story on.....

 

Clarkson being sacked from Top Gear and some One Direction kid leaving, and saying 'Where do we go from here?'

 

Honestly, WHO GIVES A FUGGIN SHEEEITE?

 

They were talking like our lives depended on Clarkson and this one direction kid.

 

Sorry, that is NOT news any day of the year.

[Lukas]

I am grumpy because sometimes, a nice drive with a nice car is not so nice because of an idiot behind the wheel who thinks that road rage has to be a part of our day. 

[RobT]

I've had to move desks at work temporarily, and instead of being in a small, quiet office, I'm in a big room full of people who answer the telephone a lot.

 

That in itself is bad enough, but the worst part is what passes for humour. 90% of the time, a witty, insightful, intelligent response to anything is to sing a line from a song which is loosely related to what the other person said.

 

Every other conversation is a string of unnecessary and often nonsensical idioms. For fuck's sake; there's no need to pad every sentence or with 'at the end of the day's and 'to be fair's. JUST SAY THE FACTS THEN SHUT UP.

 

You must work in my office then as you've described it perfectly.  Pop over and say hello, I'm the poor sod sitting between the old biddy who talks shit all day and the Irish twat with an inflated sense of self (no offence meant to the non-twattish Irish folk who may be reading this).

[plasticvandan]

all peoples are arses