The grumpy thread

6,443 · August 27

I lent a pen out for 2 mins and I get it back like this 😵‍💫

7,386 · August 27

The Co-Op have had me off 😁

24,455 · August 27

12 hours ago, Pieman said:

Are you a fan of Photonicinduction? (I live in hope that he will return to YouTube one day!)

more than a fan, he is a good friend of mine! I have had several lamps and lightbulbs for my collection from him

12 hours ago, Pieman said:

12 hours ago, alcyonecorporation said:

so long as someone touches it, goes, 'AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH' then someone else replies: 'I think you'll find that's the same answer the CID gave...'

What's that referring to?

probably the results of after @Zelandeth Slaps such a contraption across the face of the next cold caller at the door :mrgreen:

9,930 · August 27

bottom

31,946 · August 27

1 hour ago, LightBulbFun said:

more than a fan, he is a good friend of mine! I have had several lamps and lightbulbs for my collection from him

probably the results of after @Zelandeth Slaps such a contraption across the face of the next cold caller at the door

Hmm...not a bad idea.

Especially for that twat who comes around at least twice a month trying to convince me to get him to jetwash the driveway and paths, and has been pretty much since the day we moved in. You'd think eventually they would get the message...

9,930 · August 27

Dear housemate,

Maybe knock the smoking on the head if you're needing to go to the toilet every 20 minutes to throw your guts up (at shattering volume)?

And by the way, taking a bath at 4.30 every morning when you're not going out to a job or otherwise working is FUCKING WEIRD.

9,930 · August 27

Furthermore,

Local fucking roadworks.

It should not take FORTY MINUTES to do 1.5 miles. That's my new record.

Why are the locals so wilfully thick?

These same dogshit-brained people blast through pedestrian crossings, run up kerbs, scream across roundabouts, bully people out of the way on dual carriageways, but when there's a limited green filter in a contraflow works, let every single car out of adjacent lanes.

NO. YOU ARE ON THE MAIN DRAG ON A TIME LIMITED FILTER. FUCK THEM, GET THROUGH THE FUCKING ROADWORKS.

I missed the green filter 11 TIMES because THESE BELMING FUCKWITS were either flashing the whole of the city out of sideroads, or people were piling in from the opposite direction on the amber and getting stuck.

That said, people were WORKING on the roadworks today! PEOPLE! WORKING! ON THE ROADWORKS!

That's a first!
I nearly crashed when I saw that.

20,441 · August 27

9 minutes ago, alcyonecorporation said:

Furthermore,

Local fucking roadworks.

It should not take FORTY MINUTES to do 1.5 miles. That's my new record.

Why are the locals so wilfully thick?

These same dogshit-brained people blast through pedestrian crossings, run up kerbs, scream across roundabouts, bully people out of the way on dual carriageways, but when there's a limited green filter in a contraflow works, let every single car out of adjacent lanes.

NO. YOU ARE ON THE MAIN DRAG ON A TIME LIMITED FILTER. FUCK THEM, GET THROUGH THE FUCKING ROADWORKS.

I missed the green filter 11 TIMES because THESE BELMING FUCKWITS were either flashing the whole of the city out of sideroads, or people were piling in from the opposite direction on the amber and getting stuck.

That said, people were WORKING on the roadworks today! PEOPLE! WORKING! ON THE ROADWORKS!

That's a first!
I nearly crashed when I saw that.

There seems to be a growing trend of people suddenly slowing down or even stopping on main roads (sometimes 60 mph limits), to let others out of side roads. You’re not being nice, you’re stupid and endangering others.

3,832 · August 27

On 26/08/2026 at 14:18, Momentary Lapse Of Reason said:

Devon to West Lothian via ...

I don't mind my tins of paint having a stop-over holiday, just as long as they arrive when they should and without damage.

As they were due here yesterday and its Damaged Parcels Delivered I am not optimistic.

<Wonder if the tins of paint got to watch the John McPint 30 years at T' Isle of Man parade lap>

Presumably the "unexpected issue in" my area,

is that my area is in Scotland, not in the Isle of Man...

19,917 · August 27

52 minutes ago, Momentary Lapse Of Reason said:

Presumably the "unexpected issue in" my area,

is that my area is in Scotland, not in the Isle of Man...

Yeah, that would hold it up a bit 😀

19,593 · August 27

4 hours ago, LightBulbFun said:

more than a fan, he is a good friend of mine! I have had several lamps and lightbulbs for my collection from him

He lives about 200 Yards from my old school. I've always wondered what the school would look like with a big plume of electrical smoke descending on the playing fields...

46,099 · August 27

The dam has been breached.

Not even the August bank holiday weekend, and 'Back To School' is cosied up against C*******s stock in Tesco.

Not just some tubs of Quality Street, the full point-of-sale display is out, a full four months away from December.

Christmas foodstuffs - but best before 18th September?

Ye gads.

11,147 · August 27

I love mince pies. This is the start of my annual test of willpower.

I will not eat mince pies before December, but I may well be still eating in March the ones that I buy cheap in January.

19,917 · August 27

Someone who works for me bought some Christmas presents yesterday

20,441 · August 27

17 minutes ago, adw1977 said:

I love mince pies. This is the start of my annual test of willpower.

I will not eat mince pies before December, but I may well be still eating in March the ones that I buy cheap in January.

I think mince pies should be available all year round.

40,710 · August 27

11 minutes ago, Metal Guru said:

I think mince pies should be available all year round.

Amen.

Just as people claim to like sprouts but only eat them at Christmas, I’d like to see Mince Pies on sale all year to prove my undying affection for them.

I’d be as fat as a house mind. Especially the iced ones. Dang.

16,003 · August 28

10 hours ago, High Jetter said:

Someone who works for me bought some Christmas presents yesterday

A friend used to buy her Christmas shopping in June/July when the stuff was cheaper.

3,832 · August 28

On 26/08/2026 at 14:18, Momentary Lapse Of Reason said:

Devon to West Lothian via ...

I don't mind my tins of paint having a stop-over holiday, just as long as they arrive when they should and without damage.

As they were due here yesterday and its Damaged Parcels Delivered I am not optimistic.

<Wonder if the tins of paint got to watch the John McPint 30 years at T' Isle of Man parade lap>

Place your bets ...

3,832 · August 28

Sat in the front room, watching the road.

Watched a DPD van drive past at speed.

3,832 · August 28

A few minutes later,

Parcel delivered, "I remembered your house".

Well done Mekabe.

🤐

19,265 · August 28

I had lunch with my dad's parents today.

It went so well that I was genuinely pretty close to flinging myself in front of a speeding Jaecoo.

I'm now sitting in mum's back garden chain smoking. I asked how a man as kind and gentle as my dad could have come from that family.

Because he made a conscious effort every moment of every day to be as little like his dad as he could.

7,879 · August 29

9 hours ago, reb said:

It went so well that I was genuinely pretty close to flinging myself in front of a speeding Jaecoo.

Against one of those things, you'd probably come off best.

26,620 · August 29

On 27/08/2026 at 23:22, BorniteIdentity said:

...people claim to like sprouts but only eat them at Christmas...

I love sprouts! Which, admittedly, might explain a lot.

A few weeks ago, I had the cottage pie dinner at the Truckers Rest on the A5 near Cannock (where AS meets of fond memory used to happen). This is a veritable feast, with both roast AND boiled potatoes, and several vegetables. On this occasion, in place of the usual green beans there were SPROUTS, which made me inordinately pleased.

Anyway, as you were.

20,441 · August 29

2 minutes ago, chaseracer said:

I love sprouts! Which, admittedly, might explain a lot.

A few weeks ago, I had the cottage pie dinner at the Truckers Rest on the A5 near Cannock (where AS meets of fond memory used to happen). This is a veritable feast, with both roast AND boiled potatoes, and several vegetables. On this occasion, in place of the usual green beans there were SPROUTS, which made me inordinately pleased.

Anyway, as you were.

We often have sprouts with a Sunday roast, not just at Xmas.

10,680 · August 29

I visited the Gates factory near Dumfries today , my dad worked there , it's massive.

I remember sitting in the car park building opposite with the wage clerk counting the wage packets ..

It is so run down now ..... Weeds , broken glass ...

3,935 · August 29

13 minutes ago, MikeR said:

I visited the Gates factory near Dumfries today , my dad worked there , it's massive.

I remember sitting in the car park building opposite with the wage clerk counting the wage packets ..

It is so run down now ..... Weeds , broken glass ...

I drove past it in June and it is huge. I was going to go back and photograph it but was knackered so fell asleep in my Dumfries B&B. At least I now know what it was. This official notice gives a succinct history:

https://www.kltr.gov.uk/ownerless-property-transfer-scheme-opts/cases/former-factory-heathhall-dumfries/

19,917 · August 29

2 hours ago, chaseracer said:

both roast AND boiled potatoes

Also mashed on the pie?

26,620 · August 29

41 minutes ago, High Jetter said:

Also mashed on the pie?

Yep. You need eat nothing further that day. And possibly the next.

19,917 · August 29

50 minutes ago, chaseracer said:

Yep. You need eat nothing further that day. And possibly the next.

SpudUlike!

6,443 · August 29

In Edinburgh today at the top of Leith Walk, a guy pulling massive wheelies, riding the wrong way on the road, riding on the pavement on a 2 stroke crosser, a Surron rider near Bristo Sq (without a safety balaclava), then another at the bottom of The Mound jumping the lights and riding in front of 2 trams going in opposite directions.

The sooner theses c*nts either wipe themselves out or the police stop them the better.

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