The grumpy thread

[Cavcraft]

On 12/02/2025 at 07:12, Split_Pin said:

Sorry chaps I need to vent, my 'keeping the lights on' facade will slip off otherwise.

Since being told I'm getting made redundant a few weeks ago the following has happened:

- My severance will give me about 7 months' wages which is good

- I'll be scored for a matched role. There are twice the number of people compared to the roles. My face never fits so I've zero chance, I wrote that off as soon as I knew anyway.

- I've applied for 11 jobs. Been knocked back for 5 so far, had one 1st stage interview but I'm clearly under qualified and I didn't fancy it anyway.

- Audi is falling to bits:

- Intake leak thankfully fixed

- Boot leaking

- Drivers window mechanism totally scrunkled up, window held up with wedges.

- Slow puncture (already bought 2 brand new rear tyres to cure same)

E46:

All back together but because the lower intake pipe is maladjusted by a few mm, none of the rest, including the airbox will go back in. The jubilee clip is inaccessible for the lower pipe now its all built back up. It's definitely going once I get a job sorted, I wish I'd kept the red Audi and sold this instead.

75 has no chance of going back on the road any time soon.

Must keep marching.

So sorry to hear this.  Easy to say, but keep being positive as it gives off good vibes when you do get an interview. Something will turn up and all being well it'll turn out to have done you a favour finding it.

[maxxo]

Fuck

M1 smart motorway around Sheffield area

50 popped up on the gantry above me

FLASH

so that’s another ticket

[cort1977]

22 minutes ago, maxxo said:

 

so that’s another ticket

Maybe, wait and see, in my experience not all flashes lead to a ticket.

That sounds wrong now I've typed it out...

[juular]

Did think there was usually a one gantry leeway for smart motorways especially just after a change of limit.

[alcyonecorporation]

On 11/02/2025 at 20:53, beko1987 said:

Oh no, in a skoda youd get it confusing the 30mph little road running next to/crossing over the a47 with the nsl road your on. It'll then brake itself VERY FUCKING HARD down to hit that speed that it now thinks it should be doing 😂 

It's why I cover the pedals alot now in it. To recover from the above once I noticed as we scrubbed off speed I hit the throttle but too hard, thrusting it into 'here we fucking go' mode and off we fucked going faster than we were before and jerky with it 😡

As you finish fucking about and settle back down you have to be in manual mode anyway as the car still thinks it's in a fucking 30 as its not seen a new sign to update it since so it tells you off for exceeding the speed limit by a shocking 40mph*. I had it do that for 15 mines before as a lorry bloody hid the only repeater on the a14 for bloody ages. 

It's got another spot on the a16 just past crowland where you exit the 60mph averages and it thinks it's 70 so launches you up.10mph in a fraction of a second, before braking heavily by itself for the roundabout 3/4 a mile ahead! It's fun now I expect it... 😂

Many, many, many years ago, I had a similar incident with my 306. 

If the pads/shoes are low they (and ZXs, I believe) stick the handbrake light on permanently, even when the handbrake is off. 

One of my smart arse housemates, sitting in the back, decided to yank the handbrake up 'because it won't do anything if you say there's a fault and I don't believe you.' 

She decided to do this as we were rounding a bend and a bus was coming in the opposite direction. 

Yeah, cheers for that. Massive accident narrowly avoided. 

I didn't allow her in the car again. 

[alcyonecorporation]

On 08/02/2025 at 18:10, Billy - Medhurst said:

Bet they earn more than I do and cant even as a writer / proof reader cant get the model right.

I wasn't involved with this, but it's a howler. A big one. 

It's inexcusable, but I can give some context as to why this might have happened if you like.

Will anyone listen, or will I get shouted down? 

Also, this urban myth that car mag editors and writers are paid more than surgeons NEEDS TO FUCKING DIE. Lavish salaries and press junkets died  20 years ago, and the industry hasn't had a payscale review since then. EMAP pissed most of the goodwill and money straight up the wall, or their noses. Most beloved names are, were - and remain -  independently wealthy freelancers,  even the seminal LJKS. 

The average wage for a staff writer and section editor is pitiful. When I started at Kelsey in 2014, I was on £14k a year. 

[Zelandeth]

On 11/02/2025 at 23:34, alcyonecorporation said:

The very same. It wanted revenge. 

Worst one we had for it was a Q5 (which was an all round utter turd of a vehicle anyway).  Nothing like having it just randomly slam on the anchors in full emergency stop mode out of nowhere when you're cruising on the motorway.  How the car behind us didn't end up parked in the boot I've no idea.

It did this several times in the ~6 months we had it.  Though pretty much all of the ones with Pre-sense as Audi call it or equivalent have done at least *something* outrageously dangerous at some point.

The lane departure warning system in the current Multivan it absolutely hopelessly incapable of dealing with seams running along the road surface - makes contraflows through roadworks on the motorway even *more* fun!  The speed limit detection is absolutely awful as well, quite often picking up numbers from things other than speed limit signs.  You'd think there would be some logic in there so that it would do a sanity check before deciding that the 100kph limit sticker on the back of a touring coach from the continent was a 100mph speed limit sign and adjusting the adaptive cruise accordingly.  Apparently not - this is the third vehicle with this feature we've had, and they've all done it.  This one seems to be the worst for it so far though.

I'm also pretty sure in performance terms that the 1.9SDI Caddy I had could give it a run for its money.  It is hilariously sluggish unless the battery is charged...which it never is as the company car scheme refuse to provide the means to do so and instead want you to use the charge point at the office.  One of the three they have.  In a building of 1500 employees, who probably 60% of which have company cars, and who are being pushed (hard) to take EVs or plug in hybrids like this.  Yeah, that's been well planned hasn't it.

[Spiny Norman]

1 hour ago, Zelandeth said:

..randomly slam on the anchors in full emergency stop mode out of nowhere when you're cruising on the motorway. 

...lane departure warning system ..

The speed limit detection is absolutely awful as well...

this is the third vehicle with this feature we've had, and they've all done it. 
 

Shit like this really brings out the inner Luddite in me. How the fuck have we got to the stage where we're allowing cars to randomly brake, change lanes (or prevent you from doing so), speed up, slow down etc with no input from the driver? 
How does all this get through type approval, or is it like VAGshit diseasels where it manages to work properly for 15 minutes on the government's test rig but goes its own way when out in the real world?

What happens if a car doing an emergency stop on the motorway does cause a crash? It's all very well saying the car behind should be following at a distance they can safely stop but if you (or your dim-witted autonomous car) suddenly jams on the anchors for no reason at all, you can and should be prosecuted with dangerous driving.
 

[MVX11V]

I had a brand new merc AMGline A200 in 2021 as a company car and that tried to kill me several times, lane departure through roadworks trying to stuff me into the cones, emergency stop activating whilst pulling out into a busy/ fast roundabout, and 'hey mercedes'. telling me I had 18 miles of fuel left and then conking out several seconds later, in lane 3 at 70*. Shame because I kind of liked that car in the 21,000 miles I had it for, those shit features* ruined it.

That was enough to confirm that I would not be driving anything made after 2005 for the remainder of my driving life.

 

[EyesWeldedShut]

I'm grumpy because I made an assumption:
MoT advisory on a sticky caliper, I looked and found locked/rusted sliders. Got new pins etc etc and went to fit them tonight -  nope, bloody caliper itself is as much use as a chocolate fireguard.
Bloody new pads, discs, tools and shite all over the floor that I now have to tidy away until new calipers get here. 
Bollocks.
 

[Spiny Norman]

13 minutes ago, MVX11V said:

...lane departure through roadworks trying to stuff me into the cones, emergency stop activating whilst pulling out into a busy/ fast roundabout,

 

I've said it before and I'll say it again, any car that does that to me even once is getting left at the side of the road and set on fire.

[High Jetter]

4 hours ago, alcyonecorporation said:

Will anyone listen, or will I get shouted down? 

Colour me interested

[Billy - Medhurst]

49 minutes ago, High Jetter said:

Colour me interested

And me - its a fair view if both side are expressed.

[chaseracer]

On 12/02/2025 at 13:34, Split_Pin said:

Severance pay is not taxable under £30k, I'll be fine.

This is true for the compensatory ("redundancy") payment, but those for notice and 'leave entitlement accrued but not taken' are taxed as salary.

[Split_Pin]

54 minutes ago, chaseracer said:

'leave entitlement accrued but not taken' are taxed as salary.

I'll admit I'm not sure what that is.

I'm being made redundant and getting 5 weeks money for every year I've been working there, plus half my bonus. According to Gov.uk if that's under £30k then it's not taxed?

To add to my increasing anxiety, I've applied for 12 jobs now and got knocked back for 5. I think I'm going to need to start investing a bit more time in my applications now, see if that works.

[Wibble]

11 minutes ago, Split_Pin said:

I'll admit I'm not sure what that is.

I'm being made redundant and getting 5 weeks money for every year I've been working there, plus half my bonus. According to Gov.uk if that's under £30k then it's not taxed?

To add to my increasing anxiety, I've applied for 12 jobs now and got knocked back for 5. I think I'm going to need to start investing a bit more time in my applications now, see if that works.

I didn’t have to pay any tax on my redundancy, even with outstanding leave, so I’m sure you’ll be fine. I wish you all the best.

I’m applying for a job tomorrow, which I expect to get knocked back for. They want you to be within 35 minutes from base and I’m 45. Let’s see. I can’t see why that’s so important.

[Split_Pin]

Good luck as well chap.

[alcyonecorporation]

On 11/02/2025 at 19:05, alcyonecorporation said:

Accepted a lift from a friend of a friend with a Tesla. 

On the A14 the stupid piece of shit mistook a gantry for a wall and phantom braked. 
'Oh yeah, it does that sometimes,' he said. 
Oh, really? Well, I'm not OK with that. A lorry nearly flattened us, and you're willingly driving around* with this thing freaking out at gantries?!

Not getting in a Tesla again. Fuck that. 
The bloke driving didn't even say sorry. 
Perhaps you can get the self-drive to take you to EMR Metals, mate, then forget to get out, yeah? Perhaps it'll crash into a gantry/wall on the way there, and you can save everyone the hassle. 

*By the way, before theTesla apologists come on and point out that you can turn said system off, I really couldn't give a fuck.
People are so bastarding lazy when they drive these days that for every so-called self-aware EV driver, there's 10 more in Model 3s on tick relying on systems that are barely Alpha tested. Keep your shit 1:1 Tamiya cars; I fucking hated them before and hate them even more now. It tried to kill us, I don't care what your 'counter' is. If it can't fucking tell a gantry from a wall, it shouldn't be on the car. 


 

Heard from my mate (friends with the bloke whose Tesla tried to 86 us). 

It apparently did something similar on the M11 last night while his wife and sons were in the car. 

He's now told the finance company/Tesla (not sure which) that he will not be renewing the lease (presumably for another Tesla?) in three months time. 
Wife now refuses to travel in it, sons have gone from loving the car to being terrified of it.

I sent him the number for EMR and even feel a bit sorry for him now. Even if he was a total bell-end when I used the door handle on his car to open the door on his car. To get out. With a door handle. Located on the door. Of the car. 

[Pieman]

8 hours ago, alcyonecorporation said:

Many, many, many years ago, I had a similar incident with my 306. 

If the pads/shoes are low they (and ZXs, I believe) stick the handbrake light on permanently, even when the handbrake is off. 

One of my smart arse housemates, sitting in the back, decided to yank the handbrake up 'because it won't do anything if you say there's a fault and I don't believe you.' 

She decided to do this as we were rounding a bend and a bus was coming in the opposite direction. 

Yeah, cheers for that. Massive accident narrowly avoided. 

I didn't allow her in the car again. 

If someone did that to me they'd be instantly kicked out of the car and left to make their own way home.  What an absolute moron!

[alcyonecorporation]

1 minute ago, Pieman said:

If someone did that to me they'd be instantly kicked out of the car and left to make their own way home.  What an absolute moron!

oddly enough

[Zelandeth]

5 hours ago, Spiny Norman said:

Shit like this really brings out the inner Luddite in me. How the fuck have we got to the stage where we're allowing cars to randomly brake, change lanes (or prevent you from doing so), speed up, slow down etc with no input from the driver? 
How does all this get through type approval, or is it like VAGshit diseasels where it manages to work properly for 15 minutes on the government's test rig but goes its own way when out in the real world?

What happens if a car doing an emergency stop on the motorway does cause a crash? It's all very well saying the car behind should be following at a distance they can safely stop but if you (or your dim-witted autonomous car) suddenly jams on the anchors for no reason at all, you can and should be prosecuted with dangerous driving.
 

The moment that scared the crap out of me was when you're stuck in a 50mph average speed limit through road works, and the lorry behind you *really* doesn't want to slow down to 50, and insists on sitting 1" off your back bumper trying to intimidate you into speeding up.  If the car chooses that moment to slam on the anchors (and when there's clutter around like that seems to be where it's most likely to do it), some poor emergency worker would be mopping us up off the road and the M6 would be closed all day while the fatal accident is investigated.  Doubt anyone would give the emergency braking systems a second glance.

Thankfully the only injury we've had from one so far was me nearly breaking my nose on the centre console when it happened on one occasion (I was reaching down into the rear foot well from one of the rear seats to retrieve a Practical Classics magazine that had made a bid for freedom).  Cue lots of blood and me having an air vent shaped bruise on my forehead for a week.  However yes, I do reckon it's only a matter of time until this kills someone (assuming it's not already happened and just been blamed on driver error).

I find pretty much any VAG product made this century impossible to get comfortable in anyway as I'm just not the same shape as the Industry Standard Human their seats are designed for.  So I'll just stick to my 2007 Volvo thanks if I've got to cover any real ground.

[Metal Guru]

8 minutes ago, Zelandeth said:

The moment that scared the crap out of me was when you're stuck in a 50mph average speed limit through road works, and the lorry behind you *really* doesn't want to slow down to 50, and insists on sitting 1" off your back bumper trying to intimidate you into speeding up.  If the car chooses that moment to slam on the anchors (and when there's clutter around like that seems to be where it's most likely to do it), some poor emergency worker would be mopping us up off the road and the M6 would be closed all day while the fatal accident is investigated.  Doubt anyone would give the emergency braking systems a second glance.

Thankfully the only injury we've had from one so far was me nearly breaking my nose on the centre console when it happened on one occasion (I was reaching down into the rear foot well from one of the rear seats to retrieve a Practical Classics magazine that had made a bid for freedom).  Cue lots of blood and me having an air vent shaped bruise on my forehead for a week.  However yes, I do reckon it's only a matter of time until this kills someone (assuming it's not already happened and just been blamed on driver error).

I find pretty much any VAG product made this century impossible to get comfortable in anyway as I'm just not the same shape as the Industry Standard Human their seats are designed for.  So I'll just stick to my 2007 Volvo thanks if I've got to cover any real ground.

It has been posted several times that HGVs drive at 56 through roadworks using the speed limiter. Indicates 56 is probably 53 ish , not fast enough to get done for speeding but it will be on your bumper if you’ve on cruise at 50.

[Spiny Norman]

It's like Smart* motorways, people are going to have to die before the powers that be take heed and start curtailing all the automatons we've sleepwalked into allowing into our cars.
 

[sheffcortinacentre]

People have already died because of smart motorways, but no one has the decency ( fear of prosecution) to admit there dangerous & don't work.

[LightBulbFun]

1 hour ago, Zelandeth said:

it's only a matter of time until this kills someone (assuming it's not already happened and just been blamed on driver error).

this is one of my biggest concerns about these "driver assist" systems, I really do wonder how many accidents they have already caused, but no ones actually knows because that part of things have not been properly investigated?

also im really quite surprised, just based on the number of reports on this forum alone of these systems fowling up in such dangerous ways, that this has never been looked into? surely during the devlopment of these vehicles/systems, they will send them out with a test driver into the real world to test them out? it wouldn't be hard to send someone out in a test-car doing a loop of the M25's various roadworks etc, and have the system setup so it just just logs every time it wants to take action, rather then *actually* take action, and then the logs can be reviewed along with footage from cameras on the car to try and debug it all

in that regard i'd almost be tempted to setup some sort of interior and dash view dash cam to record everything, so next time it tried to send you off a cliff you can scoop all the footage up and report it to someone...

[sheffcortinacentre]

As valentine's day 2025 crossed the globe no one noticed a pattern of rear end collisions at 6.47 pm that also crossed the globe, no one that is except SKYNET that deep in it's algorithms  registered TEST SUCCESSFUL.

[mercedade]

18 hours ago, alcyonecorporation said:

I wasn't involved with this, but it's a howler. A big one. 

It's inexcusable, but I can give some context as to why this might have happened if you like.

I'd be interested, but appreciate that's not exactly a good reason for Breaking Your Silence and Speaking Your Truth.

[chadders]

11 hours ago, Split_Pin said:

I'll admit I'm not sure what that is.

I'm being made redundant and getting 5 weeks money for every year I've been working there, plus half my bonus. According to Gov.uk if that's under £30k then it's not taxed?

To add to my increasing anxiety, I've applied for 12 jobs now and got knocked back for 5. I think I'm going to need to start investing a bit more time in my applications now, see if that works.

Has there been a mass 'cull' of people with your skills by your firm?

I had this when firms stopped all development work due to Y2K and the market instantly became saturated.

[alcyonecorporation]

18 minutes ago, chadders said:

Has there been a mass 'cull' of people with your skills by your firm?

I had this when firms stopped all development work due to Y2K and the market instantly became saturated.

I'm up to 735 applications (11 months in) and haven't heard a peep from most of them. Occasionally I get a 'sorry you haven't been successful' email. 

[Split_Pin]

4 minutes ago, alcyonecorporation said:

735 applications

Christ 😳