The grumpy thread

[Jerzy Woking]

3 hours ago, Talbot said:

34mph, despite being an absolute offence, should be ignored if the guidelines are being followed.

A letter to the scamera team asking them why they are blatantly ignoring not following ACPO guidelines might have seen that quietly dropped.

They are just that, guidelines. The offence is going over 30mph.

Here in Spain, no guidelines or 10% leeway. Get caught doing 31kph in a 30kph limit = a fine. 

[Talbot]

31 minutes ago, Jerzy Woking said:

They are just that, guidelines. The offence is going over 30mph.

Absolutely, but when most scamera groups and police officers follow those guidelines, there has to be a reason for someone to not follow them.

And yes, I have heard that spain can be rather heavy-handed with it's speed limit enforcement.

[sierraman]

16 hours ago, captain_70s said:

RIP.

0 surviving examples in the UK now. 

What has likely happened there is everyone has pissed about wandering around with hands in their pockets coming up with all sorts of batshit plans like A framing it from Dundee to Tavistock on Xmas day on the proviso the spare key has been found along with an affidavit from a garage to say that although the oil change in 1983 was done but there’s no receipt. 

Meanwhile somebody turned up with money and a hiab and away it went. 

[Tadhg Tiogar]

21 minutes ago, Talbot said:

..., I have heard that spain can be rather heavy-handed with it's speed limit enforcement.

Also Switzerland. I'm not sure the French are particularly forgiving either.

[myglaren]

I cross a footbridge over the A1M fairly frequently.  The grey cameras on there say they are not speed cameras but traffic flow monitoring only.

But probably not much use as the local chavs rip the wires out of them.

[Talbot]

23 minutes ago, Tadhg Tiogar said:

I'm not sure the French are particularly forgiving either.

Depends what you're driving in France.  Barrel down the road in a Citroen DS and there's a greater chance you'll be ignored than if you're in a UK registered Ferrari.

Also, if you're not French, but at least make a basic effort to speak French, there's a good chance that +5kmh will see you with a tug, but not be enforced.  If you can't or won't speak any french at all, then I'd not be considering going even 1kmh over the limit.

Had a couple of experiences with French police, and the ability to speak even rudimentary french was absolutely essential.  I wouldn't even attempt crossing france without having some basic language skills, or at least travelling with someone who has.

[lesapandre]

I live part time in France so I can put this in context:

The death rate on the road in France is about X2 the UK.

It is a big political hot potato in all the French Departments.

Visible and rigerous enforcement of the rules has been the answer - so expect to see lots of it. It's all the politics - and if they get 50 drivers at a speed trap it's seen as 'doing  something  about it'.  It even gets reported in the local paper.

There are now a lot of 30 and 20kph zones at black spots - for good reason.

The gendarmerie  are often based far from home in big police barracks - and are not a particularly happy crew - under pressure and depressed.

So...obey the rules, carry all your documents, keep the car OK, be nice - and you will get on fine.

Never drink and drive ever.

They don't target foreigners - France welcomes millions of Brit visitors each year. They are used to foreigners but remember- it is a foreign country they do things differently there and crime is heavily punished.

 

[lesapandre]

Why do people wash perfectly  clean cars at the garage?

I'm seriously degunging one of my cars - half an hour with the jet wash - the last 20mins so a guy is waiting to wash his white Merc coupe. Slight road dirt - nothing you would not pick up in 10 mins on road. I swear the car went out dirtier than when he started what with the dirt splashing up whilst he washed it.

Well it is Lundin I 'spose.

[twosmoke300]

1 hour ago, sierraman said:

What has likely happened there is everyone has pissed about wandering around with hands in their pockets coming up with all sorts of batshit plans like A framing it from Dundee to Tavistock on Xmas day on the proviso the spare key has been found along with an affidavit from a garage to say that although the oil change in 1983 was done but there’s no receipt. 

Meanwhile somebody turned up with money and a hiab and away it went. 

Funny because its true

[sierraman]

19 minutes ago, twosmoke300 said:

Funny because its true

It’s always the way. Deep pockets, short arms but then when it ends up getting bangered everyone’s up in arms despite not having a viable offer to buy it. 

[Angrydicky]

4 hours ago, Crackers said:

They're bright orange, with hi-vis wasp stripes up the back. Probably more distinctive than a Police van, but since we're all so accustomed to the sight of a police livery on Piggy Bank vans, the orange vans don't give you the immediate "Oh shit police van BRAAAAAAAKE" response. 

Not that you would ever* be going fast enough to need that response, obviously. 

I remember it being a different livery to normal, so as you say, I didn't immediately register it was one.

Which will rake in even more fines for being ever so slightly over the limit. Nice little earner for them.

[Fumbler]

College canteen outdid themselves with this curry they've made for dinner. Two teeny tiny pieces of chicken in weird sauce with weirdly cooked vegetables. Nutricious!

[sierraman]

I suppose I’d done well to get to November 22nd without being bombarded with Slade in the shops

[Jerzy Woking]

2 hours ago, lesapandre said:

I live part time in France so I can put this in context:

The death rate on the road in France is about X2 the UK.

It is a big political hot potato in all the French Departments.

Visible and rigerous enforcement of the rules has been the answer - so expect to see lots of it. It's all the politics - and if they get 50 drivers at a speed trap it's seen as 'doing  something  about it'.  It even gets reported in the local paper.

There are now a lot of 30 and 20kph zones at black spots - for good reason.

The gendarmerie  are often based far from home in big police barracks - and are not a particularly happy crew - under pressure and depressed.

So...obey the rules, carry all your documents, keep the car OK, be nice - and you will get on fine.

Never drink and drive ever.

They don't target foreigners - France welcomes millions of Brit visitors each year. They are used to foreigners but remember- it is a foreign country they do things differently there and crime is heavily punished.

 

My brother was stopped for speeding after being clocked on radar whilst  overtaking two lorries on a D road heading to Le Mans. €750 on the spot fine, motorbike seized (but returned to him three days later). Received a letter when he got back to the UK saying he was banned from driving in France for 6 months.

A few years earlier, three of us were riding from Tours heading to Le Mans. Police car with blue lights on behind us, so I pulled over. My two mates slowed down, and as they drew level with me, stopped by tye side of the road, they gunned it away. Bastards.

Upshot was the cop saying he had clocked us at 148kph in a 80 kph limit, and had been trying to catch us for 16kms. I was polite using my best pigeon French, handed over all my documents, and said I did not know who the other two were.

Expected to have the book thrown at me. Cop seemed very angry that the other two had raced off. He told me to put my documents away, to ride slower, and told me to go.

If my mates hadn't ridden off, who knows what would have happened.

 

 

[sdkrc]

1 hour ago, sierraman said:

I suppose I’d done well to get to November 22nd without being bombarded with Slade in the shops

So here it is @sierraman

Have you been whammed yet?

[lesapandre]

30 minutes ago, Jerzy Woking said:

My brother was stopped for speeding after being clocked on radar whilst  overtaking two lorries on a D road heading to Le Mans. €750 on the spot fine, motorbike seized (but returned to him three days later). Received a letter when he got back to the UK saying he was banned from driving in France for 6 months.

A few years earlier, three of us were riding from Tours heading to Le Mans. Police car with blue lights on behind us, so I pulled over. My two mates slowed down, and as they drew level with me, stopped by tye side of the road, they gunned it away. Bastards.

Upshot was the cop saying he had clocked us at 148kph in a 80 kph limit, and had been trying to catch us for 16kms. I was polite using my best pigeon French, handed over all my documents, and said I did not know who the other two were.

Expected to have the book thrown at me. Cop seemed very angry that the other two had raced off. He told me to put my documents away, to ride slower, and told me to go.

If my mates hadn't ridden off, who knows what would have happened.

 

 

The roads can be treacherous. Pascal who owned the local historic Citroen specialist near me and was a throughly good chap and experienced driver was killed 3 years ago when his Ferrari clipped the verge on a nearby piece of road coming out of the valley - it flipped and was totally written off - he died at the scene.

I bought one of my Visas off him about 15 years ago and often saw him in the local cafe. He used to have some amazing cars in to fix including a 4x4 BX rally car one time.

There are roads near me dead straight  for about a km through the forest that then immediately drop 50m on a series of tightening corkscrew curves into the valley. It is very easy to get into difficulties on some of these French roads.

Pascal's old garage has a special yard full of totalled cars which regularly gets topped up with the latest wreck. Roads deaths are common.

[TataBobu]

3 hours ago, lesapandre said:

Why do people wash perfectly  clean cars at the garage?

 

Maybe to get away from the wife and kids for an hour or so?

[lesapandre]

Just now, TataBobu said:

Maybe to get away from the wife and kids for an hour or so?

Weeeell...he did have a bored woman in the car who may not have been his wife. 

[TataBobu]

A niece. Usually they are called "nieces"

[lesapandre]

54 minutes ago, Jerzy Woking said:

My brother was stopped for speeding after being clocked on radar whilst  overtaking two lorries on a D road heading to Le Mans. €750 on the spot fine, motorbike seized (but returned to him three days later). Received a letter when he got back to the UK saying he was banned from driving in France for 6 months.

A few years earlier, three of us were riding from Tours heading to Le Mans. Police car with blue lights on behind us, so I pulled over. My two mates slowed down, and as they drew level with me, stopped by tye side of the road, they gunned it away. Bastards.

Upshot was the cop saying he had clocked us at 148kph in a 80 kph limit, and had been trying to catch us for 16kms. I was polite using my best pigeon French, handed over all my documents, and said I did not know who the other two were.

Expected to have the book thrown at me. Cop seemed very angry that the other two had raced off. He told me to put my documents away, to ride slower, and told me to go.

If my mates hadn't ridden off, who knows what would have happened.

 

 

He's lucky to have got his bike back. Above a certain level of infringement (I have never tested it I drive like Monsieur Hulot) they confiscate and crush. No question.  But like I say they run their country differently - I'm a guest I go with the flow and enjoy the cheese.

[captain_70s]

5 hours ago, sierraman said:

What has likely happened there is everyone has pissed about wandering around with hands in their pockets coming up with all sorts of batshit plans like A framing it from Dundee to Tavistock on Xmas day on the proviso the spare key has been found along with an affidavit from a garage to say that although the oil change in 1983 was done but there’s no receipt. 

Meanwhile somebody turned up with money and a hiab and away it went. 

Pretty much. A banger will hand over £2k for an afternoon of smashing a car up and have it away the next day while an "enthusiast" will hand wring about how little it'll be worth once restored and how hard the parts are to get and the extortionate cost of transport etc, etc.

6 hours ago, Lankytim said:

Is it a U.K. model? A lot of these crowns were imported from the continent by racers circa 10 years ago. 

From my understanding it was an original UK car, I'm not sure if they were even easily available or where special order.

[Remspoor]

7 hours ago, Jerzy Woking said:

They are just that, guidelines. The offence is going over 30mph.

Here in Spain, no guidelines or 10% leeway. Get caught doing 31kph in a 30kph limit = a fine. 

Plus the Spanish use these now. No warning signs  either

[Dick Cheeseburger]

23 hours ago, captain_70s said:

RIP.

0 surviving examples in the UK now. 

The comments above about some 'enthusiasts' ultimately being timewasters vs. banger racers stepping up to the mark with the money for a quick, hassle free sale is pretty accurate. 

The key difference is if an enthusiast did buy the car, they'd be more likely to be a custodian and keep the car in a reasonable state. 

The banger racer would be the final owner, the vehicle wouldn't be saved and once it had done a couple of laps it would be the end. 

As a spectator, the idea of plentiful £200 snotters doing a few laps in a final blaze of glory rather than be collected from the owners drive and promptly cubed is entertaining. 

The idea of a rare, desirable car which is still restorable, and which many people would like to see on the road/at shows/being enjoyed/still existing being smashed up for the hell of it seems barmy. I know the ethos within banger racing circles is 'the rarer, the better' - it's a sad sight to see though. 

I guess the reality is money talks and most people don't give a shit what happens to their car the second it leaves their ownership. 

[wuvvum]

1 hour ago, Remspoor said:

Plus the Spanish use these now. No warning signs  either

Presumably though in the case of automated speed cameras (rather than a copper at the side of the road with a radar gun) it's now become more complicated since Brexit for EU police forces to pursue UK drivers?

[wuvvum]

Yesterday I went to move the Scénic, flicked the wipers on to clear the dew and they worked fine.  So I decided that the issues I was having before must have been a temporary glitch.  Today I tried them again and they now won't work at all.  Which is fantastic*.  It means that I have a car which is starting to owe me quite a lot of money by the time the MOT work has been done, and which I'll only be able to use on dry days, unless I fork out £300+ for a replacement pair of used wiper motors which may or may not last, or over £600 for brand new ones.  I did think about wiring up a separate switch to the driver's side motor and removing the passenger side wiper arm, so at least I'll be able to see where I'm going in the wet, but I'm not even sure if it's a reciprocating linkage or if the motor just runs in reverse on the downward sweep - if so the separate switch idea isn't going to work.

To add insult to injury (or rather the other way round), I backed the car up onto the ramps and got underneath to compare the spring I've bought with the remains of the existing rear springs, and I appear to have done my back in.  I now can't pick anything up off the floor or even bend over properly without getting a twinge, so unless it sorts itself out before the weekend there's no way I'm going to be up to heaving axles around.

TL; DR: f*ck modern motors and f*ck middle age.

[Wack]

Sold some hifi on eBay 3 fucking times now , 1st one didn't pay , 2nd one didn't pay , 3rd one paid instantly hoofuckingray 

He's only 80 miles away and it's very fragile so I offered to deliver it Wednesday 

The guy is made up , we make arrangements 

Just checked and ,"changed my mind, can I cancel ", what a twat 

So now I've got to wait for another low fees weekend before I can list it again

 

 

[Tadhg Tiogar]

7 minutes ago, Wack said:

Sold some hifi on eBay 3 fucking times now , 1st one didn't pay , 2nd one didn't pay , 3rd one paid instantly hoofuckingray 

He's only 80 miles away and it's very fragile so I offered to deliver it Wednesday 

The guy is made up , we make arrangements 

Just checked and ,"changed my mind, can I cancel ", what a twat 

So now I've got to wait for another low fees weekend before I can list it again

At least you can block all three from bidding again.

[High Jetter]

15 minutes ago, Wack said:

Just checked and ,"changed my mind, can I cancel ", what a twat 

Just say no? Contracts are contracts.

[robinmasters]

10 hours ago, Talbot said:

I heard rumor once that if the variable speed limits are not turned on, the speed cameras are set to something very high indeed, 95mph or something like that, in order to catch only the very worst (and completely indefensible) offenders.  Would make a lot of sense:  a fair balance between being cash scameras and actually catching the worst speeders.

That's my experience. 

I've been flashed loads of times at work (normally by old ladies rather than speed cameras), and that fits with my experience.  I've never been flashed on the motorway (rarely get above 95mph, 100 downhill is pretty much all our vans can manage), and non-motorway cameras seem to be triggered way over the speed limit-30mph area cameras rarely go off if you're doing less than 50mph.  

Having said that, I've been done in my own car for doing 37 in a 30.  

[High Jetter]

4 minutes ago, robinmasters said:

been flashed loads of times at work (normally by old ladies rather than speed cameras)

Yea, you wish! 🤣